Seeking Me To Find You (Finding You Series Book 1) (23 page)

*

I go through
the motions of the day but my mind is on that cute little blonde probably still nursing a hangover. Nate sent me a text today letting me know she was stilling feeling rough but unfortunately he had to leave to go back to L.A. for a meeting. He sent me his assistant’s number in case I need to reach him if he’s unavailable. I feel like an ass for the things I said about him. He genuinely is her best friend and she’s lucky to have him.

As I am driving home for the evening, I think about my conversation with Nate. I understand that she grew up with a dad that was a Marine, but even Lane showed me that this was not enough. It’s harder on a wife because when a Marine is gone, all responsibility falls on her shoulders. I’ve seen it too many times.

When I turn into my parking space, I see Grace unloading things from her car. She looks like hell, but in an adorable sort of way. Her hair is piled into a messy knot; she’s wearing a white t-shirt and a pair of sweats that sit low on her hips. Getting out of the truck, I’m conflicted on whether or not I should see if she needs any help.
Hell, what could it hurt?

As I walk up to her car, she is not there. Seeing her trunk still full of items, I load up my arms and walk to her door that is propped wide open. Hesitantly entering, I see that Grace is nowhere in sight. What the fuck is wrong with her leaving doors wide open so any degenerate could just walk in? I set the items on her table and check the downstairs bathroom.
Where the hell is she?
As I am walking back into the kitchen she is coming down the stairs.

“Holy Hell!” she screams while throwing up her best kung fu stance.

“It’s just me,” I laugh.

“I don’t know what the hell is so funny. You almost gave me a heart attack.” Relaxing her stance but still on guard, she stalks towards me. “What are you doing in my house?”

“I was coming home from work and saw you unloading things from your car. I thought that I would help.”

Grace walks over to the door and opens it, motioning for me to leave. “Didn’t you help enough last night? You had to tell on me like a petulant toddler.”

Now she is pissing me off. “Well you were the one acting like a
petulant
toddler last night. And since you’re being this way, we need to discuss why your door is always
wide
open for anyone to just come in. What if I was an intruder? Do you think you could have done something about that with your Kung Fu shit?

Well, that did it.

“Get. Out. Of. My. House!”

The shrill of her voice is like none other than I’ve heard. I don’t think my mom ever hit that octave.

Shutting her door, I start to inch closer to her, causing her to back up against her sofa. By being so close to her, I can smell her sweet scent; God I’ve missed that. Dark circles rim her eyes while still looking pale but she is still the most gorgeous woman I have ever laid eyes on.

I lean forward and she leans back, counteracting my every move. Hovering inches from her face, I study her eyes shifting back and forth to mine. The look on her face is not of fear, but of longing. The energy between us ignites. As I am contemplating my next move my cell rings, bringing me back to reality. The number on my phone is from the base. Having to take it, I turn back towards the door.

“Kavanaugh. Damn it. When did that happen?”

Ben explains that a recruit snuck out in the middle of the night and is missing.
Shit!

“I’ll be right there.”

Circling back to where I had left Grace, I see that she is now positioned in the middle of her living room. I jerk open the front door and just walk out. Like. An. Idiot.

*

The whole time
we were searching for the crusty maggot my thoughts were filled with Grace. Lately, she’s all I think about. After about two hours, we received a call from security at the neighboring airport. It appears they found the idiotic recruit dangling by his pants on one of the razor sharp fences. It looks like this Marine will not be going home tonight. The dipshit is pretty cut up so naturally I drew the shortest straw to accompany him to the hospital.

As I’m waiting for the recruit to be released my thoughts are racing at warp speed. I’m so exhausted. Usually during a three year stint as a drill instructor, a Marine will go on ‘quota” for three months to a year, which allows him or her to get a break from the rigor. During this time, a Marine is assigned to other recruit training duties such as instructors in water survival, martial arts, or shooting range. Pulling back to back thirteen week stints is exhausting. Most Marines use this time to reconnect with their family. That’s why I never took one in almost a year and half…I don’t have a family to go home to every night. Feeling extreme fatigue overcoming me, I decide it’s time for a break.

*

The rest of
the week was no better. It got so bad; I decided that it was time for me to speak with the Sergeant Major.

“Sir, I think it’s time for a break. I’ve been full throttle for the past year and a half and my body is taking the brunt of it. I would like to request a quota for six months. I would gladly take any position you may give me. Also, I’m requesting to take two weeks of leave after this cycle because I’m about to lose some leave. I’m at my max for carryover.”

“It’s about time, Marine. You’re one of our best instructors, but you’re no Superman, despite what the Corps tells you. Every DI needs a break, so don’t beat yourself up.”

Standing at attention, I respond with a “Yes, sir.”

“Request granted. Anything else?” he barks.

“No, sir.”

“You may be excused.”

I turn to make my way out when he stops me.

“And Marine, no matter what has been engrained into your thick skull, there is a life outside of the Corps, there is room for a family. You just need to make the room.”

Turning back to the Sergeant Major, I end with, “Sir, yes sir.”

Feeling a weight lifted off my shoulders, I head home for the evening.

*

Now that I
have made my decision, the next couple of weeks go at a snail’s pace. The weeks become so mundane from the repetitive cycle that faces us. Ben, Logan, and I have everything so choreographed that we could do this in our sleep. That’s one of my problems. I use to be able to come home from the day and sleep like a rock. Hell, I’ve slept many of times under a humvee while flying in a C130 but I can’t sleep in my own damn bed knowing that she is two units away. Every time I drive by and see a light on, I try to imagine what she’s doing. That’s why two shots of whiskey has become my nightly ritual.

Graduating this platoon has been the most challenging task since coming to MCRD San Diego. Some days I want to strangle the recruiters for some of the piss ants they put in. This platoon started out with multitudes of problems, but I think we finally got them on track.

Now that these thirteen weeks of hell are over, I’ve decided to take my two weeks of leave to visit my mom. Before my sister and I were born, my mom was a special education teacher. She gave up teaching to raise my sister and myself because dad traveled so much. After my father passed away, she bought a horse farm. Seeking her passion once again, she and my sister run a program for autistic children, where they use horses as therapy. When I deploy, I usually send Thor to live on the farm where he can be carefree and get spoiled by two doting ladies. I think it’s about time for a little therapy for the both of us, plus I long for my mom’s cooking instead of a MRE or chow hall food.

As I’m packing the truck I notice Grace jogging into the complex. Slowing down, I can see her struggling with some sort of decision. Instead of turning towards her door, she makes her way slowly towards me. Thor, with his graceful self, lunges his body knocking Grace off balance, into my arms. We stand pressed together for what seems like forever, when she finally pulls away.

“I’m sorry that he’s always so rude.”

Tucking a stray hair behind her ear, she looks away. “He’s fine. I love him and his rude self.” Grace shuffles from one foot to another. “I see you’re going somewhere.”

“Thor and I are going away for some peace and quiet.”

“Hmm,” she says quietly.

“I can only roll over so many days of leave and I’m at the point where I am going to lose them if I don’t use them.”

I don’t know why I feel the need for explanation but I do. Seeing her standing before me makes me long for the time when I had the right to pull her in for a passionate kiss… or just hold her hand gently.

“Well, I don’t want to get too late of a start. If you need anything, I know Adam or Ben would be more than happy to help you.”

I load Thor into the passenger seat and jump in the driver’s seat. Grace is still standing there looking as if she wants to say something, but she doesn’t.

“Grace…,” I say longingly.

“Have a good trip,” she says as she turns away.

Grace

A
s I make
my way into the house my thoughts begin to race. I relive every conversation between Jackson and myself, searching for how we got here. The energy and desire is still there, but both of us are so guarded. I can’t live my life that way.

Walking into the kitchen, I notice that my back door is ajar. I’m going to have to get someone to come over and take a look at the door. It must not be closing properly, causing the wind to blow it open. I look around, yep, everything looks in order. I grab a bottle of water out of the refrigerator and proceed to go outside on the patio.

The morning is a little cool and crisp, which made my run refreshing. Thanksgiving is coming up soon and I haven’t made any plans. My mom has tried to make me commit to coming home for the holiday, but it’s such a short break to fly east. I told her that I’ll come home during my Christmas break. She was disappointed, but was excited that I would be there for Christmas. Nate said I’m welcome to join him and his new gal pal in Hawaii but I don’t want to play the third wheel. Maybe I’ll just stay home to get caught up on work and start my Christmas shopping.

I make my way inside to take a quick shower when my doorbell rings. I open the door and who do I see? Evan. Questions start filling my head. How did he find out where I lived? Why did I not check the peep hole? Why is he here? Why is he holding flowers? Why is he wearing a smug look on his face?