Finding Home (11 page)

‘What do you mean?’ I asked. ‘Are you guys not officially a couple?’

‘I don’t know. He hasn’t asked me, but we hang out a lot, ya know, and…do stuff.’ Lily almost blushed. My diversionary tactics had worked.

‘Like, do
it
?’

I knew that it was immature to say ‘it’ when I meant sex, but the whole concept still seemed rather daunting to me despite my new non-virgin status.

‘Like, sex? Yeah, we’ve been doing that for aaaages.’ Clearly, she had no such qualms.

‘Do you use protection?’ The words were out of my mouth before I could pull them back. Oh God, please don’t guess what I’m actually asking here.

‘Seriously, Amy? Yes.’

‘Like what?’

‘The pill! And condoms! You’re supposed to use both to be on the safe side. What sort of an idiot do you take me for?’

One potentially like myself?

‘Oh, okay. So it’s planned sex, but you’re not dating.’ I tried to steer the conversation back towards the original topic, but my mind was elsewhere. Even if Luke had used a condom, I most definitely was not on the pill.
Crap.
I felt my stomach sinking.

‘But it’s different, you know? I’m starting to like him. A lot. And he comes over to my house all the time. He even cleaned out the gutters for Mum. I mean, she paid him, but he still did it. He’s…it’s — I don’t know, it just feels different.’

‘So, why don’t you ask him to be your boyfriend?’

‘I can’t do that!’ Lily reached across the counter and slapped me on the arm.

‘Why not? He likes you. I think he’d be stoked,’ I said. It was true. And besides, anyone could see that Kyle was a tall, rude, bad-ass guy, and Lily was a delicate, beautiful rock ‘n’ roll chick. People like that were born to be together.

‘It would just be weird,’ Lily said. ‘He needs to ask me. I’m happy just screwing around and…I don’t know.’

‘Don’t know about what?’ Kyle was in the doorway now, dressed only in a pair of boxer shorts. I felt weird and immediately averted my eyes. I wasn’t attracted to Kyle, and I didn’t need to see his hairy chest.
Eww.

‘Don’t know about…’ Lily paused, faltering, looking to me for help.

‘She doesn’t know why she didn’t just tell me about her Mum having a baby,’ I said, jumping in. Kyle looked too hung-over to notice our deception; not that I’d picked him as the most observant bloke, anyway.

‘Oh, that. Yeah, well I guess it is odd. Who’s the father, anyway? And it’s strange she’s having another kid when she’s already got one so old.’ Kyle walked to the fridge and pulled out some orange juice.

‘I’m not old!’ Lily protested.

‘Awesome! I found ham,’ Kyle said, ignoring her. He grabbed it out and threw it on the counter. ‘Make me a toastie, babe?’

‘Well,’ I said, ‘as cute as you and your ham-related banter is, I’m gonna go home.’

‘You’re not going to spill any gossip, then?’ Lily asked.

‘Nope,’ I said, shaking my head.

‘And you’re just going to go home? Not off on some secret rendezvous?’ she pressed. This time there was a serious tone to her voice.

I shook my head again. I did want to see Luke, sure, but I had to wait. I had to make sure he’d broken it off with Coral before we had our next kiss.

Oh, yeah. And I needed to make sure that I wasn’t pregnant.

‘My daughter needs to see somebody, now!’ Mum slammed her fist down on the counter. It made the pile of paper in front of the triage nurse shudder.

‘I have already told you that she’s in the queue and will be seen to as soon as possible.’ The nurse’s face was hard, her eyebrows and mouth set in stone.

‘Mum, it’s not a big deal,’ I said for what felt like the thousandth time. I hadn’t minded when she’d grabbed me and taken me off to the hospital after I’d cut myself picking up that glass, even though Dad said it was nothing. But now that the bleeding had stopped, I just wanted to go back to the car and snooze. Mum, however, wouldn’t have a bar of it.

She marched me from the counter to the green plastic chairs that were set out with military-like precision in the ER waiting room. It was quite busy, which I guessed was normal for a Thursday night. I looked around the room. There were a few people there who were keeping their illnesses to themselves, and one young woman with a baby that just wouldn’t stop crying. Then there was a group of guys who were discreetly drinking beer and laughing at one of their gang who I could clearly see had hurt his ankle. The offending limb was warped, with his shin pointing off in a different direction to his foot. It made me feel sick.

‘I wish I could get a decent coffee here.’ Mum stuck out her bottom lip and started to chew it.

‘They have a vending machine,’ I offered.

‘Decent, Amy, decent.’ She rolled her eyes at me. At least she’d calmed down enough to joke.

The baby started screaming again, bawling its little eyes out. As Mum continued to work at her lip, her jaw moved up and down with a quiet urgency. The noise was obviously getting on her nerves.

I decided now would be as good a time as any to ask.

‘Mum? When we go to live with Lou, is it because it’s good for us?’ The next words stuck in my throat. ‘Or are you and Dad…breaking up?’

‘What? Has he said something to you?’ She swivelled her body in the chair, giving me her entire attention.

‘No, I just —’

‘He’s said something! He wants a divorce? That creep! I’m the mother of his child!’ Mum was all but yelling. The group of guys with the beer looked over in our direction. I cringed.

‘Mum, he didn’t say anything, I promise. I just thought maybe, since you guys have been fighting a bit…’ I let my voice trail off into nothingness.

‘Amy, people argue and disagree all the time. It’s just how the world works!’ Mum looked a little relieved. ‘Your father and I have a perfectly normal relationship. Or, we would, if he wasn’t so bloody famous.’

I sunk further down in my seat.

‘Amy Detrinella?’ I looked up to see a man in a white coat calling my name. Clearly, he was the doctor. Mum and I walked over to him, ready to follow him through the door and into the admissions part of the hospital.

‘Linda! What the hell?’

Dad’s voice roared through the waiting room. He stood in the doorway, still in his stage gear, his t-shirt soaked through and sweat plastering his hair to his forehead. He looked worried, really worried, and it occurred to me that Mum likely hadn’t told him where we were.

‘Our daughter hurt herself picking up glass, so I took her to the hospital.’ Mum didn’t hesitate. ‘Because I am a responsible parent.’

By now we had the attention of most of the waiting room. The group of guys with the beer had taken out their mobile phones, recognising Dad. I’m pretty sure I saw a flash go off. Dad must have noticed too, because he threw his legs forward and crossed the room in a heartbeat.

‘Amy, are you okay?’ His voice was all concern, his forehead creased with worry. He took my hand in his and cradled it, like it was the most important appendage in the world.

‘She will be when she sees a doctor.’ Mum slapped his hand, forcing mine to jolt rather uncomfortably through the air.

‘She doesn’t need to see one, do you, Amy?’ he asked. There was heat in Dad’s voice again.

I didn’t want to answer, didn’t know what to say. Mum and Dad glowered each other, sharing an unbroken look of hatred

It was the doctor who eventually took charge.

‘Look, how about I take Miss Detrinella to get her hand checked out and then you three can leave?’ He opened the door to gesture me through and, after a nod of approval from both parents, I left with him, relieved to escape the mounting tension in the waiting room.

I walked to the nearest bed and perched on the edge, intimidated by all the electronic hospital equipment around me.

‘I’m Dr Williams,’ he said, introducing himself. He pulled the curtain to, leaving us in our own enclosed space within the hospital. I sighed. Finally, I was free from my parents.

‘Rough night?’ The doctor shook his little round head from side-to-side. He had twinkly eyes. I liked him instantly.

He cleaned my hand and put a bandage on it, telling me that the cut could use some stitches but would be okay without them.

When he’d finished, he said I could stay and lie down for a bit. I guess he felt sorry for me. I was grateful for the offer and lay back on the bed, resting my head on the pillow. It wasn’t incredibly comfortable, but it was nice to have this quiet moment of respite. I dreaded going back out to the waiting room. I didn’t want to have to pick a side. How could I choose between Mum and Dad?

I closed my eyes and must have dozed off a little, and when I woke I was completely alone. If only I could have spent the night there.

Instead, I threw my legs off the bed, rubbing my eyes with my non-damaged hand and shuffling back out into the waiting room. I was ready to face my family.

Dad had left, and Mum was sitting on a chair next to the group of boys. She had a beer in her hand, the same brand that the boys were drinking, and a smile on her face. From her bright, cheery smile you’d never guess she was the same woman who’d started going ape-shit not long before.

Mum’s face lit up at the sight of me. ‘Baby girl, how was it?’

‘Fine, just a clean up,’ I reassured her.

‘Do you want to meet my new friends?’ she asked, gesturing to the group around her. ‘They’ve been nice enough to delete those photos they took of you, your father and I.’

I blinked. What? I had seen them taking photos of Dad, but it hadn’t even occurred to me that I’d been in them, too. The poor daughter of Stevie D, standing in a hospital waiting room with blood drying on her hand and not a scrap of make-up in sight?

‘Th-thanks,’ I stuttered. I hadn’t thought that people would be interested in me because of Dad. I wasn’t ready for this. I needed Mum and her Lou sanctuary more than ever.

‘No worries, babe,’ one of the boys said, smirking. I immediately wished I was wearing a jumper, so that I could wrap it tightly around me. Something about the way he looked at me, appraising me, made me feel like a piece of meat.

‘Can we go, please?’ I asked Mum. She nodded, thanked the boys for the beer, and then we walked out the front to the taxi stand.

Night-time was over. I could see the silhouettes of trees starting to take a shape on the distant horizon. It had been a long evening.

‘I promise that Dad doesn’t want to break up with you. He hasn’t mentioned anything to me,’ I said. ‘And thanks for getting those boys to delete that photo. I…I really think moving is a great idea.’

Mum pulled me close and kissed me on the top of my head.

‘I won’t ever let anything bad happen to you, baby girl,’ she whispered. ‘Always remember that.’

* * *

Why I don’t like small towns, reason number 442: there are no doctors available on the weekend. Well, none I tried from the phonebook, anyway. And somehow I had the feeling that if I asked Lou for her local GP’s phone number so I could pick up the morning-after pill, she’d be pretty unimpressed.

So first thing Monday morning, instead of getting to school early and waiting around to catch a glimpse of Luke, I was looking for what had been described to me over the phone as a small brick building. I was told there would be a doctor inside who could help and would be non-judgmental.

After wracking my brain for a few hours, I’d texted Lily to ask her which doctor she’d seen when she went on the pill. Thankfully, she’d remembered the place. It was a clinic she’d called the ‘Sexy Hospital’ that was located — you guessed it — within walking distance of the school, Lou’s house, Lily’s house, and pretty much everything else in Cherrybrook.

It wasn’t exactly how I’d expected a sexual health clinic to look. It was a plain, nondescript red brick building, located right next door to an optometrist and a podiatrist, with no big flashy sign out the front that pointed out the nature of the business taking place inside its walls.

I walked inside the brown wooden doors and was greeted by a bright and cheery receptionist. She handed me a form to fill out, clicking her long pink nails over the top of it as she handed it to me, her long chestnut hair pulled back into a shiny ponytail. She seemed to love her job, which probably involved getting to know all the dirty secrets of the people in town. I was just lucky I was new and of little interest. I sat on one of the vinyl orange lounges and waited, trying not to stare at the big bowl of condoms on the waiting room table in front of me. Other doctors gave out lollies…

‘Detrinella?’ a short Chinese man asked the empty waiting room.
Yep, that’s me. I’m the one who had irresponsible sex on the weekend,
I almost answered. Instead, I nodded and followed him down the hall to a small room that smelt like Dettol and cleaning products. Probably a good thing, I decided.

‘So, Miss Detrinella, what can I do for you today?’ He asked, crossing his legs and placing his hands on his knee.

‘Um, well, on the weekend, I, er, had’ —
please, God, strike this building with lightning and save me from having to finish the sentence
— ‘sex. I had sex.’

‘I see.’ The doctor nodded. ‘Go on.’

What? Go on? Go on with what? That was it, wasn’t it?

‘Um, and then I went home?’

The doctor laughed, like I had told him some huge joke. ‘Very funny. So, morning-after pill, condoms, contraceptive pill…what are you here for?’

Oh, right.
‘The morning-after pill, please,’ I said, relieved it was that simple.

‘Did you have unprotected sex?’

‘Um…yes,’ I finally answered. I wished the earth would just open up and swallow me whole. The bad dream you have where you’re naked at school had nothing on this.

‘You know, that’s highly irresponsible.’ The doctor shook his head at me like I had disappointed him. I cringed. ‘Was it with your boyfriend?’