Counseling Through Your Bible Handbook (22 page)

Medications and drugs:
Certain legal and illegal drugs can cause depression, such as analgesics, antidepressants, steroids, contraceptives, and cardiac medications.

Chronic illnesses:
Medical problems such as a thyroid deficiency and even a bout with the flu can cause chemical imbalances in the brain, which can cause depression.

Melancholy temperament:
Orderly, gifted, and creative, the person with a melancholy temperament can, at the same time, be moody, overly sensitive, and self-deprecating. Because they are analytical, critical, and hard to please, they can take everything too seriously—too personally—and quickly become depressed.

Improper food, rest, exercise:
A deficiency in the physical basics of life can contribute to a chronic sense of fatigue, lack of energy, and social withdrawal.

Genetic vulnerability:
Based on statistical data, those with family members who suffer from depression are two times more vulnerable to depression than those with no family history of depression.
³
Likewise, “50% of those with bipolar have at least one parent with the disorder.”
⁴

If you are concerned about depression, learn what you can about your family history and treatment options.

“A simple man believes anything, but a prudent man gives thought to his steps”

(P
ROVERBS
14:15).

Some people say, “Depression is anger turned inward.” This is not always true, but is true when anger
is repressed
. Repression occurs when unacceptable desires and emotions are blocked from a person’s awareness and left to operate in the unconscious mind.
⁵
This stuffed or swallowed anger causes masked depression and keeps underlying bitterness from being exposed. Bitterness is a major cause of depression.

“Each heart knows its own bitterness, and no one else can share its joy”

(P
ROVERBS
14:10).

…a loved one, expectations, self-esteem, respect for others, control, health or abilities, possessions, personal goals? If so, read Ephesians 4:31: “Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice.”

…losing a job, abandonment, dying, growing old, empty nest, being alone, failure, rejection? If so, read Isaiah 41:10: “Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

…work difficulties, financial obligations, relocation, family responsibilities, marital problems, troubled child, workload, alcoholic spouse? If so, read 1 Peter 5:7: “Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”

Even our deep disappointments must be resolved or our bitterness will cause trouble. Unresolved anger and bitterness can hurt those who are close to us.

“See to it that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many”

(H
EBREWS
12:15).

Disobedience and guilt provide enough fertile seed to turn any white cloud into a dark storm.

Unless you apply the remedy of confession and repentance—a change of mind and a change of direction—you may find depression sweeping over your soul and spirit, and, like the disobedient Israelites, “you will find no repose, no resting place for the sole of your foot. There the L
ORD
will give you an anxious mind, eyes weary with longing, and a despairing heart” (Deuteronomy 28:65).

When you ask God to forgive your sins through the power of Jesus’ death and resurrection, He becomes your forever Savior.

At times, you will be disobedient and need to confess and repent. This is not a renewing of your salvation, but a maintaining of your relationship with the Lord. On the other hand, if you’ve never confessed your sins and asked Jesus to become your Savior…

True joy from God is greater than a life without struggle. It’s a peace that remains when life falls apart. It’s an assurance deep within that enables you to find satisfaction in Him, to trust in His sovereignty through the most harrowing storm. This is possible because God, and no one and nothing else, becomes your greatest delight. And right now, He wants to share this joy with you.

“As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love…I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete”

(J
OHN
15:9,11).

Allow the light of God’s love to permeate your “ditch of darkness” and guide you to the Road to Transformation. Here are the steps you can take to C-O-N-Q-U-E-R depression:

C
Confront any loss in your life, allowing yourself to grieve and be healed.

“[There is] a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance”

(E
CCLESIASTES
3:4).

O
Offer your heart to God for cleansing and confess your sins.

“If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness”

(1 J
OHN
1:8-9).

N
Nurture thoughts that focus on God’s great love for you.

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness”

(J
EREMIAH
31:3).

Q
Quit negative thinking and negative self-talk.

“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things”

(P
HILIPPIANS
4:8).

U
Understand God’s eternal purpose for allowing personal loss and heartache.

“We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose”

(R
OMANS
8:28).

E
Exchange your hurt and anger for thanksgiving, and give thanks even when you don’t feel thankful.

“Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus”

(1 T
HESSALONIANS
5:18).

R
Remember that God is sovereign over your life, and He promises hope for your future.

“For you have been my hope, O Sovereign L
ORD
,
my confidence since my youth”

(P
SALM
71:5).

Following are suggestions for how you, one gentle tug at a time, can begin helping your loved one out of the ditch of depression.

— Learn all you can about depression—read books, watch videos, attend seminars (see Proverbs 23:12).

— If suicide is a concern, ask, “Are you thinking about hurting yourself or taking your life?” The person may get mad, but it’s better to have a
mad
friend than a
dead
friend (see Proverbs 18:21). (For more on this, see Suicide Prevention on page 395.)

— Take all suicide and self-injury threats seriously. Fifteen percent of those who are depressed ultimately kill themselves
⁶
(see Proverbs 18:4).

— Be an accountability partner and say, “I’m with you in this, and I won’t abandon you” (see Ecclesiastes 4:9).

— Initiate dialogue regularly through frequent phone calls and intentional contact (see Proverbs 16:21).

— Listen and hear the person’s pain. Listening affirms the person’s value (see James 1:19).

— Talk about depression. Talking helps remove the stigma of depression (see Proverbs 25:11).

— Verbally encourage the person sincerely and often (see 1 Thessalonians 5:11).

— Realize the power of touch, such as a hand on the shoulder or appropriate hugs and kisses (see 1 Peter 5:14).

— Play inspirational praise music to lift spirits. Music is therapeutic (see Ephesians 5:19).

— Bring laughter into the person’s life—through fun notes and cards, videos, movies, and people (see Proverbs 17:22).

— Provide “nutritional therapy.” For example, vitamins B-6 and E, calcium, magnesium, and folic acid are helpful for combating depression. Ask your doctor for more information (see Ezekiel 47:12).

— Help the person set small, daily goals that require minimum effort, and check on his or her progress regularly (see Proverbs 13:4).

— Enlist help from other family and friends. Be specific about concerns (see Galatians 6:2).

— We may never understand it all, but we can know this:

“Though he brings grief, he will show compassion, so great is his unfailing love. For he does not willingly bring affliction or grief to the children of men”

(L
AMENTATIONS
3:32-33).

When your heart feels weary and deeply pressed down, let the weight of your depression press you closer to God.

—JH

Psalm 130:5

Psalm 42:11

Psalm 54:4

Proverbs 15:22

Philippians 4:8

Isaiah 43:2

Philippians 4:6-7

Job 6:10

James 1:12

Jeremiah 29:11

For additional guidance on this topic, see also
Anger, Codependency, Critical Spirit, Dysfunctional Family, Evil and Suffering, Fear, Forgiveness, Grief Recovery, Guilt, Hope, Identity, Illness, Marriage, Rejection, Self-worth, Victimization, Worry
.