Zombie Rules (28 page)

RULE NUMBER 9: THEY HAVE A HERD MENTALITY.

RULE NUMBER 10: THEY FOLLOW THE PATH OF LEAST RESISTANCE.

             
“Don’t forget to sign it.” Julie said. I smiled and added my trademark signature, a capital Z in block form.

             
Julie watched me, and then turned to Fred. “Well Fred, did he watch Zach painting?”

             
Fred lowered the binoculars. “Every word I believe. It looked like he read it out to his friends on the radio as well.” He looked over at me. “We can sit here and wait on them I suppose. Or we can try something else.” I looked at him questioningly. “I believe if we just get in the van and drive off, curiosity will get the better of them.”

             
Julie frowned. “We’re not going to leave are we? They might know something about Tommy and mom.” I knew she would be even more upset if we left without trying to talk to these people.

             
“Alright, I think Fred may be on to something. We have a dozen steaks sitting in the cooler, plus a grill.” We had been keeping the meat on ice, but they were going to turn rancid soon and we either needed to cook them or throw them out. “Let’s find somewhere nearby, but away from all of these corpses and fire up the grill. I’m willing to bet somebody will come check us out.”

             
“Do we just sit here? Can’t we signal them somehow?” I gave her a shrug. She was getting impatient. I understood, but there was nothing any of us could do to alleviate that.

             
Fred grunted. “Baby girl, they know we’re here. They might be a bit worried. They might believe we’re up to no good.” Fred took his hat off and scratched his head while looking at the buildings. “Of course, they could have a sniper in one of the windows about to shoot us.” He put his hat back on. “I wouldn’t try to go through their entry gate uninvited.” Fred made a good point.

             
We were hungry, and we all agreed we did not want to eat while in close proximity to a bunch of stinking corpses. “There’s got to be somewhere close where we can set up.” I said as I carefully drove over the bodies. Every few seconds, there would be audible crunching noises. Occasionally I’d run over a head and there was a distinctive popping noise, like a watermelon exploding. Rick would have laughed in glee. I would have too if it was just him and me, but today I kept quiet and continued down Sidco Drive.

             
In many places the bodies were stacked two and three deep. We travelled about a hundred feet before the roadway finally cleared. Fred suddenly straightened. “Let’s stop here. The parking lot is clear and the business might have some stuff we can use.” I looked at the business he was pointing at. It was a manufacturer for swimming pool heaters.

             
“Okay, fine with me.” I looked in the backseat to see if Julie would object. She looked at me wistfully, but didn’t say anything. I drove in and circled the parking lot. The back gate was open, so I stopped in front of the building. “Uh, Fred, is there anything in particular we’re looking for?”

             
Fred gave a slight nod. “Copper, and copper fittings. I told you I was an engineer. I got a few ideas.” He was animated now. No, not really. He just kind of dipped his head when he was talking about something he felt passionate about. “We’re going to build a greenhouse for you two, and I’m going to work on some modifications. We’ll need plumbing for irrigation.”

             
“Oh.” I said, but I was a bit perplexed. There was a Home Depot approximately four blocks from us. Plenty of plumbing fittings there.

             
Fred must have read my mind. He pointed back toward Houston Barracks. “We stop here in sight of them, they’ll come. You wait and see. Besides, I got a few more ideas as well. C’mon, let’s go inside and I’ll show you.” He turned back at Julie. “Baby girl, why don’t you set the grill up and get a fire going. I expect we’ll have company very soon.” He gave her a wink. “We’ll fill their bellies up and they’ll answer anything we ask them.” Julie understood the logic and smiled hopefully.

             
We had no trouble prying open one of the bay doors. We waited a minute to see if the noise we made attracted anything. There was no response, so we went inside and spent the next ten minutes clearing the building of any possible zombies. We were fortunate. Not a single one.

             
The business had various types of heavy machinery. There was no way we could haul any of it back in the van, we’d need to use a tractor trailer rig. But, there was a lot of material consisting of tubing, fittings, thermostats and plain sheets of copper in various gauges. Fred motioned me over and pointed.

             
“We’ve got everything we need right here to make solar water heaters. The only power you’ll need is for the water pump, but we can incorporate solar panels, or even fashion a windmill for power.” And then Fred did something quite odd. He smiled. “We can make some really good stills too.”

             
“You mean moonshine?” Fred nodded. “Do you drink a lot Fred?”

             
“Seldom, if ever.” Now he gave me a wink. He was very emotional today. “I’m betting there are a lot of survivors who do though. Alcohol will be an excellent trading commodity.” I nodded and smiled in understanding. I had to hand it to him, this man was smart.

             
“Besides, a still doesn’t have to be used only for alcohol. They make great water distillers as well.” He was right. A still could be used for a lot of things. I was about to enumerate a few dozen, and then thought better of it. Fred looked around and shrugged.               “Are you getting hungry?” I nodded. “Me too. We can load up this stuff after lunch.”

             
I agreed, and we went back to the parking lot and joined Julie. She had the grill going and had even found some chairs for us to sit in. She looked up as me as I approached “Do you think this will work?” She asked.

             
I kissed her on the forehead and sat down. “I think so. Look.” I pointed. “You can see a couple of the upper floors of the tallest building. You can bet the soldier with the binoculars is watching us. I don’t think they’ll ignore us. They probably have to talk about it first, but eventually somebody will come to check us out. Probably a squad of four or five men. We’ll talk to them, offer them some food, and most importantly, we’ll ask about Tommy.” I gave an encouraging smile. I hoped I was right.

             
The steaks were just about cooked when Fred gave us a heads up. A Humvee loaded with five soldiers drove up. We waved. They stopped near the entrance about fifty feet away and got out casually. They were in military uniforms and all were armed with M-4 automatic assault rifles. I stood and waved again. Two of them tentatively waved back.

             
I looked at my partners, shrugged, and walked over to our new guests. “Are you men hungry? We’ve got steaks and boiled corn. We only have water to drink, but it’s clean.” The smoke was carrying the aroma toward them and it could even be smelled over the lingering stench.

             
The passenger looked to be in his mid-thirties. I could see the rank insignia affixed to his headgear, a silver rectangular bar, indicating he was a First Lieutenant. As I looked him over, he removed his hat and wiped his brow. His ebony black head was clean shaven. His features were sharp, chiseled. He reminded me of a track athlete. He was obviously the one in charge, but before he could speak, the driver interrupted.

             
“What’s your name boy?” He demanded.

             
Did he just call me boy? I looked him over. The name tag said Hart and his rank indicated he was a corporal. He was maybe twenty or twenty-one. He was a couple of inches shorter than me, maybe five-eleven. The loose fitting uniform made it difficult to tell how much he weighed, but nothing disguised his butt-ugly face. He had thick lips that were severely chapped, heavy lidded eyes, and a greasy face dotted with acne.

             
“Knock it off Hart.” The lieutenant responded. He directed his attention to me. “I’m Lieutenant Ward. I’m in charge here.” He pointed at the other two. “These two are Privates Dawson and True.” They waved half-heartedly. “And this one is the never ending pain in my ass, also known as Corporal Leon Hart.”

             
“It’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m Zach.” I pointed to Julie and Fred. “These are my friends Julie, and Mister McCoy.” I leaned forward a little bit toward Leon. “If you see a boy anywhere around here, you just go ahead and knock him down.” I punctuated it with a challenging wink. He responded with a humorless smile, showing yellow teeth. They reminded me of kernels of corn.

             
“Are you serious about those steaks?” Private Dawson piped up. “I haven’t had a steak in a coon’s age.” Dawson was obviously from a more rural area. He had a distinct southern twang. He was also one of those people who could go without eating for a week and still be fat. His double chin jiggled when he spoke. It was hard to tell his age, but he appeared to be the same age as Hart. He smiled at me hopefully.

             
I glanced at True. He was a light-skinned biracial man. Clean shaven with just a hint of a moustache. He reminded me of a smaller version of Jason. I hoped it was only a similarity in looks and not the personality. He cradled his M-4 in a safe manner, but could bring it on target quickly. He never said a word, just kept scanning the area. I presumed he was watching for zombies. Or perhaps he was on the alert for an ambush. Pretty smart.

             
“Of course,” I said. “We were hoping to meet survivors, so we brought extras. Come join us by the grill.” The lieutenant nodded a tacit approval, and the men walked with me over to where Julie and Fred were now standing. Fred nodded at them but made no effort to shake hands.

             
Leon leered at Julie and offered his hand. “Wow, you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve seen in quite a while. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Julie reluctantly extended her hand. Leon pulled close and kissed it sloppily. Julie yanked her hand back, which just caused Leon to chuckle. “Relax babe, you’ll grow to like me. All the women do.”

             
His crass remark got a chuckle from Dawson. Leon glared at him. Dawson shut up immediately.

             
“Corporal Hart, could you mind your manners just for a few hours?” Lieutenant Ward said tiredly. It looked like there was an ongoing battle of wills between the two men. I also noticed the Lieutenant visibly grimaced when he sat in one of the chairs. Fred glanced at me. He noticed as well. Ward looked over at Private Dawson. “Dawson, get some of those bottles of Gatorade out of the back. The least we can do is share.” Dawson grinned and trotted back to the Humvee.

             
Ward looked around and pointed at the building. “What were you two doing in there?”

             
“Waiting on you gentlemen of course.” I said. He looked at me questioningly. “We were not sure what kind of reception we’d get if we walked in the front gate, so we went for plan B.” I said and gestured toward the freshly cooked steaks. “C’mon guys, let’s eat.”

             
I did not have to say it twice. Julie played hostess and filled each plate with a large steak and two ears of corn on the cob. I watched as the men savored every bite. Leon ogled Julie continuously, but she acted as though she did not notice. Fred caught my eye again. I knew what he was thinking. This Hart was potential trouble and would bear watching.

             
Corporal Hart finally turned his attention to me and smiled without humor. “So, Zach is it? Where are you guys from?”

             
“Well Leon, we live not too far from here.” I pointed out to some nondescript area over his shoulder. “Out in the country. We thought we’d come into town and see if there were any other survivors, scrounge around for stuff we could use, you know.”

             
He grunted. “Just so you know, this building, all of these buildings in this area, are under military jurisdiction. Nothing leaves without our approval.”

             
Fred had remained quiet until now. “That’s awfully pretentious of you young man. Perhaps you would be good enough to show us the paperwork giving you this so-called authority. Maybe those steaks are under your jurisdiction as well. Hell’s bells, maybe we should ask for your forgiveness for butchering the poor cow.” He was leaning casually against the van. He looked very nonthreatening, at least to everyone else. Julie and I knew better.

             
Lieutenant Hart was working his mouth trying to phrase a response. Leon reacted by hurling a bottle of Gatorade at Fred. Fred deftly caught it and looked at it.

             
“I prefer the purple flavor, but orange will do. Thank you,
boy
.” He emphasized the last word. I liked it. Leon didn’t.

             
Butt ugly boy had his M-4 slung across his shoulder. He scowled and started to reach for it. I held up my hand and pointed. “Lieutenant, is this the way you normally treat people? Is this how the military is supposed to act?”