Zandor (16 page)

“I’m not comfortable with that.”

“It’s not up to you. I said we will stand by each other and you agreed. That’s the way it’s gonna be.”

He was getting angry
.

“I need to take care of unresolved issues.”

“When will you figure out that there are some issues that you can’t take care of? Your father should have protected you from day one. He isn’t up for the job, it will be my fucking privilege, Bekah, to do that.”

He opened the door for room service and wheeled the cart in.

“Prime Rib, Kitten, for you. Sit, please.”

He turned the song and it was beautiful.

A girl like me could buy into all of what he was saying, hook, line, and sinker. A girl like me would get caught and tossed back weakened to the sharks and make the mistakes of the past over and over again.

The song he played repeated
Hello My Old Heart
by the Oh Hello’s. He meant for me to hear it.

I sat across from the table eating steak with a beautiful man who was seducing me with his eyes, his words, his promises made in a song. A man who had never done this before. As real as it felt I knew it would end like everything else did. Ugly, sad, and I would be broken.

I knew this would be a fight until the bitter end and I wasn’t ready for that. I chose not to fight with him and enjoy the illusion set before me. For now.

Let Her Go

Zandor

Looking at her across the table
, I felt that feeling in my stomach again. A feeling I felt earlier, down deep. A feeling I’d never had with a girl or woman. I couldn’t stop looking into her eyes. She was the same girl who walked into the shop, confident and beautiful. The girl I knew now was full of shit that day, and just as full of shit right now.

“Is it cooked alright?” I was making small talk about food now.

“Yes, I’m just tired. I should probably go home and get some sleep.”

“No!” Okay Z
, that was real cool you fucking pussy. “I mean stay here. We can have your clothes washed. You said you were going to.”

She smiled sadly
. “Listen…”

I stood up and pulled her chair out
. “No, come here.”

I pulled her behind me
toward the bedroom and when I turned around she was looking down, deep in thought. “I don’t want you to leave. Not now, not…”

She grabbed my face and kissed me. She kissed me hard, not easing into shit
. “I want you.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” She dropped her towel and pulled mine off. “Now.”

“Easy
, Kitten. We have all night.”

She shoved me on the bed and straddled me.

She leaned over and kissed my neck and then up to the top of my head. Her plump tits were in my face. Now I’m no country music fan, but that
Motorboating
song popped in my head and fuck if I could control myself.

She giggled
when I motorboated them tits and flipped her on her back.

“You have the best tits
, Kitten.” I held her arms up and held them down with my knees. “I’m so pissed that I blew those candles out, I want to drip wax on them so fucking bad.”

I pushed them together and shoved my cock between them. She bent down and nipped the tip of my cock and I was shocked.

“Hmm a naughty little Kitten. I should spank that ass and then fuck it.”

She looked shocked and I smirked
. “Just joking.”
For now
.

“You scared me
.” She closed her eyes.

Okay, note to self. She can act like a crazy ass all she wants
, and you can’t tell her what you have in store for her…yet.

I slid down her body and
lay between her legs.

“You’ve never done that?”

“Anal?” She gasped.

“Yeah.”

“Exit only.”

“You might like it.”

“I don’t think I would.”

“Hard limit?”

“What?” She laughed nervously.

“Never mind. Tell me what I can do for you right now
, Kitten. Tell me what you need from me.”

I kissed her neck and let my hand slide down her body. Her little purrs told me what she liked and what she wanted. But as much as I wanted inside her, raw dog, I needed her to talk. Because I was not ready to leave her here without letting her have a reason to come home.

I rolled off her and lay beside her and took her hand and kissed it. “
Il mio dolce gattino
.”

She smiled sweetly
. “What does that mean?”

“I can’t tell you.”

“Say it again?” She yawned

“I’ll tell you when we’re back in Jersey
.” I leaned over and kissed her. “Please listen without getting pissed.” I leaned forward and kissed her. “I want what’s best for you. I want you to move forward and not back. I have a past too, Bekah, I am choosing to keep it there. I wanted to break two men in half today…”

“Okay
, I really don’t want…”

“Two men that hurt you, the girl that has made me, ME want her and only her, to have a relationship? It’s fucking crazy
, Bekah. Beautiful, crazy, and alien to me. I know you’re blaming yourself for…”

“Please don’t, just please
.”

I held her against me.

“Bekah, I won’t leave you here alone. I can’t, not with them, not when you’re unable to see that you are wonderful and deserve far more than what they are capable of giving you.”

“It’s not your choice
, Zandor. I have obligations to my father.”

She was getting pissed, tensing up and distancing herself.

“It’s not your fault that he’s in the hospital.”

“Then whose is it
?”

She sat up and grabbed the towel
, wrapping it back around her.

“Okay
, just lay back down. I won’t push, I get feeling obligated to family. I just wish you’d see that it’s not alright for someone to treat you like that.”

“It is! Did you not hear what I’ve done
? I’m an awful person. A disgrace to my father…” I tried to interrupt. “No! I’m dealing with it. I’m trying to become a better person and then you…”

“Don’t…”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying okay, it’s not you, it’s how you make me feel. Dex was caring and attentive at first and then things changed. After he learned about me he looked at me differently. He wasn’t a bad guy until he knew me, the real me. You’ll do the same Zandor. You already are.”

“I’m fucking trying to tell you none of that shit matters. None of it makes me look at you any differently than I did the day you walked into the shop.”

She rolled to her side, her back to me. “I am going to go home and get some sleep.”

She started to get off the bed and I grabbed her
. “No fucking way!”

“You can’t make me stay
, Zandor,” she said as I pulled her back down.

No, I couldn’t make her stay but I fucking wanted to. I wanted to tie her ass up and not just to fuck her either. I didn’t want her to be treated like scum by two pieces of shit.

“He’s gonna hurt you.”

“My father?”

“No, Dex.”

“He says he loves me
, Zandor. He wants to get back together.”

I let go of her, it was instinct to pull back
. “So why did you even fucking bother coming back here?”

I fucking knew something was wrong with the way she was acting. Not while I was touching her, not while I was kissing her. I had her then, no doubt about it.

“I didn’t know.” She stood and I walked into the bathroom.

“I know, you needed to get fucked. Take your clothes and just go, thanks for the illusion
.” I grabbed my boxers and pulled them on. I looked up and she was staring at me. “I’ll call you a cab.” I walked over and grabbed her phone and saw four missed messages from Bryant Dexter, “Your boyfriend messaged.”

I had never felt so angry in my life. I was pissed at her father, her fucking BOYFRIEND and her. I was pissed at myself
, too. I always prided myself on the fact that I knew women not only physically but I could read their body language and mannerisms. I was way fucking off with her.

“He’s not my boyfriend,” she whispered.

“Tell yourself whatever you want. There’s a term for what’s going on with you. You’re an enabler.”

“Is that what I am?”

“Apparently, and fuck if I wasn’t wrong about you. Thanks for the lesson.” I grabbed my shirt and threw it on.

I stood all pissed off looking at her
.

“I need to make sure my father’s okay.”

“Well that’s great, Bekah.”

“I thought you might understand something like that. That’s why I came. I …never mind.”

“No, let’s hear it!” Damn, I was gonna lose it.

“I won’t fight with you.”

“Why not?”

“Because I like you! Because I think you’re a nice person
. Because just like everything else in my life I screwed up being a friend to someone who has treated me decently. I’m poison, Zandor!”

“Are you gonna fuck him?”

“No I told you I’m staying to help my father. You may think I’m an idiot and I just may be, but I’m not heartless. You know what? Fuck you!”

I grabbed her
coat away from her and threw it to the side. “Ladies don’t FUCKING TALK LIKE THAT.”

She went and grabbed them
. “I’m not a fucking lady!”

I picked her ass up and threw her on the bed
. “Why the fuck did you come here?”

She pulled her knees up to her chest and buried her head
. “I needed you!”

She was shaking
. “Then don’t fucking pull this shit, Bekah!”

I grabbed her and laid her down and laid next to her
.

“I’m staying here to help my father.”

“Then I will too. I can make him like me.” I was rubbing her back harder than I should but I was so amped up I couldn’t control it.

She looked back at me
. “Not now okay?”

She was crying, of course she was
. I was a fucking ass.

“I can’t leave you here alone.”

“I can’t have you here in a hotel while I’m trying to take care of him.”

“Why? Shit sorry, I’m really not trying to be a fucking ass
, Bekah. But I don’t think I can leave.” I wiped her tear away.

“I’ll be fine.”

“And you won’t fuck that …” I couldn’t even say his name.

“No
, of course not.”

I wanted to ask if it was because he was a piece of shit or because of me but that wasn’t gonna happen.

“I trust you, not him.”

She smiled a little
. “You threw me on a bed.”

“Yeah, I didn’t hurt you though.”

She shook her head no.

“Good ‘cause I’d have to kick my own ass for that.”

She closed her eye.

“You
tired ?”

“Yeah.”

“Will you stay with me tonight?”

“Yes.”

I closed my eyes and gave a little thanks to the good Lord and then I felt her lips on mine.

I didn’t move I just opened my eyes and she looked fucking beat.

“Just stay like this?”

She shook her head no.

“I promise to always be honest with you, just do the same, please.”

She
nodded and my hand moved up her shirt. “This alright?”

“Please,”
her lips whispered against mine.

I was going to take my time with her. I was going to make her walk out of here tomorrow knowing how I felt and missing everything about me.

I took her lips between mine, slowly tasting and sucking on them. I held the back of her head firmly and slowly eased my tongue in between her lips. I licked her tongue in slow strokes, up then down, up then down. Her hand was in my hair holding on as I continued tasting her sweet minty wet mouth. Her hips began to move beneath me and her legs spread making more room for me. I reached behind me and pulled my shirt up and took my mouth off of hers to remove my shirt.

I kissed her again and she moaned into my mouth. I pulled away
, startling her again as I unbuttoned her shirt. After each button was open, I kissed her exposed flesh, slowly, softly, with no urgency. I took my time with her, licking, sucking, teasing, every inch of the tits I knew I was in love with. I laid my lips above her heart and felt its beat intensify as I looked up into her eyes.

“Your heart
, Bekah, is a beautiful thing, let me guard it.”

She closed her eyes and moaned
, arching her back into me.

I slowly made my way down to her thong and pulled
it down kissing her from hip to hip as she tried to lay still, tense and wanting. I threw it to the floor. I kissed up her ankle, kissed her sweet little lips, and I couldn’t help but give them a lick.

I looked up at her watching me
. “Tell me what you want from me, beautiful Bekah.”

“I want you inside of me,” she panted.

I kissed up her stomach and knelt between her legs and rubbed my tip against her clit. “Nice and wet, Bekah, you don’t disappoint.”

I eased a finger inside of her and stretched her. I pulled my finger from her and sucked it
. “I’m a selfish lover, Kitten, and I just needed a taste of your sweet pussy’s milk. Now I’ll give you what you want.”

“Please,” she was breathless.

“Anything for you.” I rubbed her with my cock, lubricating it in her saturated slit.

Slowly I pushed inside her stilling as she moved her hips against me making room for me. Each inch I fed into her
, she savored. The moans of pleasure weren’t making it easy to control myself from slamming into her and fucking her until she screamed my name. But I was on a mission, one that would leave her remembering every fucking minute of tonight.