Yours Unfaithfully (35 page)

Hugh was in sparkling form, as always. “So Ratty, tonight it must be my turn to escort this lovely lady on her walk around the lake.”

“What do you mean?” replied Ratty, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“On the contrary, it’s an excellent idea, especially if we are to preserve her good name, after all being seen with the same man on too many occasions could lead to gossip.”

“Except of course there’s no one here
to
gossip.”

“You only suppose that ... for all you know her husband might have paid one of these Germans to spy on his wife. I’ve been watching that twenty stone fellow over there, he’s never taken his eyes off of her.

“If you’re determined to persist with this foolish notion I think we should ask the
lady
to decide who should escort her tonight.”

“Why don’t you both escort me? That way honour will be satisfied all round.”

“Because, my dear Melanie, Ratty would not be happy with such an arrangement, is that not so dear boy?”

“Hugh, you’ve already said you want to meet my charming assistant Nina upon your return. Don’t compromise your chances by trying it on with her best friend.”

“I can see you’re not happy with Mel’s suggestion, Ratty. Ordinarily I would be forced to challenge you to a duel at dawn, but as I know you don’t like early mornings I’ll concede to you on this occasion, but remember, you owe me.”

The intensity of their bid for her attention was bliss to Melanie. She was enjoying it as much as they were. It was like the trip had become a party that went on and on. She found herself dreading the day soon, when this would all end and she would return to a life of washing, ironing, cooking and cleaning with the odd moment of romance with Tim on Saturday night, after the kids had gone to bed. Ratty kept telling her that there was more to life than she was getting with Tim. She supposed he was right, but it wouldn’t work with Ratty, they’d get fed up with each other, she’d still have underwear to wash, it would just be his underwear instead of Tim’s. You’d better face up to it, Mel, she told herself, once this trip is over your life will be back to the same old boring routine that you left behind. Nothing will have changed except you girl. Better enjoy this while you can. After the coffee Ratty looked at her with that puppy dog look that said, ‘Come on... walkies’. She read his expression and stood up from the table.

“Come on then, Ratty, the lake awaits us.”

They set off together in the direction of the ski slope and before they had reached it he took hold of her hand. They strolled along in a state of perfect contentment, willing this walk to last forever. At the half way point they looked across the lake at the hotel as usual. Ratty led Melanie up the grassy slope until they were some way from the path, then he slumped down onto the grass, gently pulling her down with him. She didn’t resist. He took hold of her and lavished her with cuddles. She succumbed to his embrace readily, making no effort to restrain his enthusiasm. Soon his hands were inside her clothes, one hand seeking the soft flesh of her backside while the other went around her waist. She relaxed and let the moment take care of itself. She couldn’t pretend that she wasn’t happy, or that she wasn’t enjoying having him close to her. Their intimacy was something special, something they shared only when they had each other to themselves. A moment in time that would probably not happen again and before long would be impossible to re-create against the backdrop of her life back home. He gently lifted her bra and held her in his hands. His hands were soft, softer than Tim’s, and he took more care not to hurt her. She knew that he would rather die than hurt her, yet in a way that’s what he
was
doing; she would hurt later when she had to face either the guilt or the end to moments like this. His hand was inside her skirt, inside her pants...

“Stop, Ratty,” she said, grabbing at his hand and easing it back to her waist. “I can’t you know that. I’ve told you it’s impossible, I have to go back to Tim. Try to understand.”

“You don’t have to go back to him, Mel, we can be together forever, and it can be like this every night of our lives. I want to touch you, feel you, hold you, love you. I want to make you mine and most of all I want to be yours.”

“He’s bound to question me about my time here with you and Hugh. I’m already going to have to lie. I couldn’t face him knowing that I’d let you.”

“Then don’t face him. Let me go and see him, let me tell him that we have decided to spend the rest of our lives together. I’ll be friendly, I’ll offer him financial help if he needs it, and I’ll ask him if we can meet to make arrangements over access to the children.”

“Ratty, he’s got some pride ... do you seriously think he’d accept your money, knowing that you had defiled his wife?”

“I guess he wouldn’t, but I could give you money which you could give to him. You could make sure he had enough to buy a place of his own. He knows you’re earning well these days, you could convince him that it was your way of saying sorry to him.”

“But that would be lying to him, wouldn’t it? I don’t want to lie to him, and I don’t want to see my kids for only half of their lives. Please get it into your head, Ratty, it can’t happen. I have to go back to Tim and you have to try and forget me. Come on, let’s go, it’s getting cold.”

Melanie was up and walking. He knew the moment had been almost within his grasp, but once again it was gone. He was thrilled that she had let him share this moment of intimacy, it meant she had genuine feelings for him. She wasn’t a woman who could let a man touch her unless she loved him, at least a little bit. But he was filled with sadness too, at the impossibility of the situation back home where the demands of her children and her husband made it impossible for him to give her all the love that he was aching to give her. Back at the hotel they took drinks on the balcony lounge overlooking the lake. It reflected the hotel lights in a way that was as beautiful as the experience. He sat her on his lap and in silence they stared across the lake to the place where an hour ago they had lain on the grass and she had in part given herself up to him. He tried to make light of their escapade.

“Can you see the spot where we flattened the grass?” he said pointing.

“Yes, I think so,” she said. “Do you think we’ll ever find that spot again?”

Ratty knew it was a reference to them and not the location.

“I hope so Mel. You made me the happiest man in the world tonight. I wish it didn’t have to end when we finish our drink. Come back to my room for a drink and let me hold you again, like before but longer, let me hold you until morning. It hurts me to let you go.”

“I know, Ratty, I know how you feel about me, but I wish you wouldn’t. I can’t give you what you want. I’ll come back for one drink but then I have to go and get some sleep, OK?”

“Of course, let’s go.”

Monday evening in the Globe was usually busy and tonight was no exception. Ben held his pint high above his chest to avoid spillage in the jostle to get away from the crowded area by the bar. Once safely in the corner where Tim was sitting by the window, he eased himself into a wooden arm chair and took a sip of his drink.

“Just like old times, Tim, you and me and no women to bugger our evening up! I’ve missed these nights. That’s the only thing I have missed though since I moved away from here.”

“Not missing Nina then?”

“Are you kidding? Nina gave me hell for all those years and I never realised it. It’s only now, now that I’m in a happy relationship that I can see just how crap those years were.”

“Come on, Ben, it wasn’t all bad, surely?”

“Well let me think... no… I’m sorry, Tim, but I can’t remember any good bits, and do you know why that is? ....cos there weren’t any.”

“Ben, you spent a long time with Nina, you’ve got three kids together, don’t you feel anything?”

“Oh yes, relief, Tim, relief at never having to go into that house again and have her stinging me with her spiteful tongue. Christ, Tim, you don’t know the half about that woman. She can curdle milk with her scowl and strike fear into a Rottweiler with her tongue. You wouldn’t want to spend more than five minutes with her Tim, trust me.”

“So what happens now?”

“‘Now... well I know everyone is saying there’s too big an age difference between us, but sod em, Beckie and I are happier than either of us have ever been. I know it sounds corny, Tim, but I love her and she loves me.”

“Love, that old chestnut, don’t talk to me about love.”

“Things gone pear shaped again with Mel?”

“I don’t know, I haven’t seen her for weeks.”

“What?’ Ben choked on his beer. ‘Where is she, she hasn’t left you has she?”

“She might as well have. In a manner of speaking she has left me, she’s gone to Poland with a couple of blokes from work on some project for the bank. Nina’s boss is one of them; he’s the one that made her go. I’m well pissed off about it.”

“Why did you let her go then?”

“Ben, she didn’t ask me, she told me, that’s why. Do you seriously think she’d take any notice if I said, ‘Sorry Mel, but you can’t go’? She’s due back in a week’s time, but I’m so pissed off with her I’m going to be struggling to say hello to her when she gets back.”

“Big mistake Tim. Your Mel wouldn’t do anything she shouldn’t, you know that. She’s probably spent every night crying her eyes out for you and the kids. Don’t screw it all up by being horrible to her, welcome her back with some flowers, that sort of thing, take her down the Walnut Tree like you did before. Show her you’ve missed her.”

“I don’t know if I can, Ben, I’m too upset at the moment, she’s hardly phoned me since she got there. What kind of a wife does that make her?”

“She’s a bloody sight better than Nina, that’s for sure. How’s the new job going?”

“Brilliant, better than I could have hoped for. Simon, that’s my boss, he’s a millionaire, mind you, he’s a gem, terrific bloke. He’s the best person I’ve ever worked for, looks after me like a brother, we’ve become really good mates.”

“What’s it like driving that car around? I bet you get a few looks don’t you?”

“I should say, and because Simon insists on me wearing a good suit – he even bought it for me, – it looks like it’s my motor. I tell you, when I park up somewhere on my own and get out people open doors for me, even had one guy call me sir.”

“So, Mel did you a big favour getting you that job and making you pack in at the yard then?”

“She did, but don’t forget why she did it. She just wanted me to have a snob job like she has. She didn’t know that Simon would turn out to be such a decent bloke, I doubt if she’d have cared, as long as I came home without oil on me at night.”

“That’s not fair Tim. She could see you were going nowhere. Ask yourself, what would you have been doing down at the yard in say, five years’ time?”

“I don’t know.”

“Yes you do ... the same as you were doing the day you left, mate, crawling under trucks, bumping your head, splitting fingers on sharp bits of engines and getting covered in shit and grease. If you can’t see that she was right to get you out of there you need contact lenses. She’s bright, your Mel, had the sense to see that you couldn’t go on doing that job forever, got you out just in time.”

“Maybe, but I still wish she hadn’t pissed off to Poland. I can tell you one thing for certain, I won’t be letting her go off anywhere else after this little lot, and if she kicks up a fuss then so will I.”

“Good for you Tim, let her know who’s the man in your house.”

“Is that what you do with Beckie?”

“No need mate, she’s too clever anyway to be fooled by that kind of thing. I let her make all the decisions, she’s better at it than me, and anyway she wouldn’t go to Tesco without me, let alone go to Poland. We’re like that, we are.” He crossed his fingers to illustrate the bond between them.

“She let you out tonight on your own though?”

“It was her idea. She said I shouldn’t drop my mates completely. She’s having a drink with Sophie at the wine bar in town. Does Nina still ask about me?”

“Not much, not any more. I think she accepts that you’ve made other plans, plans that don’t include her. Maybe she’s got plans of her own.”

“What are you saying, Tim, has she met someone?”

“Oh, I don’t know, do I? I just meant she might be thinking about looking for a new relationship, after all she can’t wait forever for you to come back can she?”

“No, especially as I’m not coming back. Still it sounds a bit strange, like, hearing you say she might have another man in her life. I don’t know if I like that idea much.”

“Ben, do you seriously think she is going to wear black and take a vow or something because you dumped her?”

“No of course not, but it’s a bit soon isn’t it? I mean... I’ve only been gone a few weeks.”

“Ben, you didn’t die, you pissed off with another woman!”

“That’s not the point, if she’d loved me that much she would still be too upset to think about going with another man. You don’t think she has do you? I mean you don’t think she’s actually, you know, done anything like that, do you?”

Tim felt his face reddening, his lungs refused to take in oxygen, his breathing would have indicated to anyone that he was suffering intense discomfort, embarrassment, guilt even. Anyone except his best mate, Ben.

“You all right, Tim? you look like shit. You’re probably as shocked by the thought as I am, but I suppose it’s possible. Christ you live with someone for all those years, you think you know them, then you turn your back for a couple of weeks and they’re at it with some other bugger. Well she can piss right off if she thinks I’m paying bloody maintenance, she earns twice what I earn and more. If I have to climb on the balcony of Buck House dressed as Batman to protest then fine, but they won’t get one bloody penny out of me.”

“You can’t stand heights, Ben. You wouldn’t even get over the wall.”

“OK, fair enough, but you know what I mean. I’ll go on the dole first.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time, Ben, would it?”

“No, Tim, it bloody wouldn’t. Anyway, I told you before, we’re trying for a kid of our own. We’ll have a struggle to pay for that one, let alone paying for hers.”