You're Gone (Finding Solid Ground) (30 page)

Charleigh stood back. With arms folded and resting across the top of her belly, she watched as the man took in his surroundings. It occurred to her that that was only the second time he had ever been inside her home, even though he’d been taking care of her horses for the last few months. The first was when he’d rushed in through the backdoor after hearing her scream like a banshee.

Without a word, Cord took his time to look at the furnishings. Elegant but comfortable, that just about summed up the way he thought of Charleigh Randall. He looked long and hard at the boxes that dotted the room and shook his head before turning back to her. He’d just keep his thoughts on that to himself.

“Where should I start?” Cord asked as he nervously shifted his old rusty toolbox from one hand to the other.

Biting down on her bottom lip, Charleigh took a good look at the boxes. There were so many of them that she wasn’t really sure what they held, but most of the ones with the baby furniture were already upstairs in the nursery. They should begin there, with the cribs, she supposed.

“I guess up in the nursery,” she answered, tossing her thumb over her shoulder.

Without another word, Charleigh turned toward the stairs, and Cord followed obediently. She held onto the rail, taking one step at a time. They were halfway up when she stopped. A brief moment of hesitation passed through her mind as she turned around. A sudden craving for tacos filled her.
Yum!
Corn tortilla shells piled with spicy ground beef, freshly chopped lettuce and tomatoes, shredded cheddar cheese, salsa, and sour cream. Charleigh’s mouth watered just thinking about it.

Meanwhile, Cordell stood a few steps below. He looked up at her in uncertai
nty. Lines formed across his forehead and around his eyes.

“I hardly had anything for lunch today, and now I’m starving,” Charleigh told him, her voice trembling. She shrugged, not quite sure what to do or say next. She never did when it came to this man who stood in front of her.

Cordell continued to look up at her with the same look on his face that he always wore when he looked at Charleigh. He never spoke a word. Most likely, she thought, he was trying to get his point across that he wanted to get up there, get done, and get back to his quiet life on the ranch. After all, he was only there to do what Madie had asked him to do. It was because he was he was being paid to do a job and not because he and Charleigh were friends.

Finally, Cord backed down the stairs, nodded his head along to whatever thought was going through his mind. In his quiet, gruff voice, he said, “I’ll go on up and start, if you don’t mind.”

“Sure,” Charleigh replied, coming back down into the living room. “I’m going to fix up some tacos. Would you like some?”

“No, but thank you, Charleigh.” He cleared his throat, squinted down at her from under long, sooty-black lashes. “I don’t wanna intrude.”

“You wouldn’t be intruding. I spend so much time alone here… I’d actually appreciate the company.” She shrugged again.

“Well, you shouldn’t spend too much time cooped up by yourself. It’s not good for you.”

“No, I guess not,” Charleigh agreed. “I’m just not ready to go back to work at the feed store. And look at me,” she added with a sarcastic laugh and motioned to her ever-growing belly, “It’s not like I can work at the ranch with the horses.”

It seemed like the only thing Charleigh did anymore was sit around, watch television, and stuff her face. At twenty-one weeks, she weighed about one hundred forty-seven pounds. Doctor Emerson said that her weight was fine, considering she was pregnant with twins. And she spent a lot of that time thinking about how she was going to do as a mother. With the help of her family, Charleigh knew she’d get along pretty well.

“Everything at the ranch is fine, and your granddaddy’s holding everything together up there with the clinic and the feed store. Right now, you just need to focus on yourself and those little boys. Let us take care of everything else.” Cordell nodded and started up the stairs. “I’m gonna go ahead and start on that baby furniture. You get yourself something fixed to eat.”

Charleigh nodded. A kind smile spread across her lips. “Yeah, ok. Are you sure you wouldn’t like some tacos? I always fix more than I can eat by myself.”

“I suppose I could.”

***

The kitchen was filled with the wonderful smell of food cooking. It wasn’t unusual because, like paint and horses, food had become another way for Charleigh to work out what was going on in her mind. She thought about her daddy and what he would think about becoming a papa. And she thought about Jamie. How it should be him who should be up there putting baby furniture together. Not Cord. She would have to settle for whatever help she could get.

Chopping the lettuce and tomatoes, Charleigh thought about the land she had bought
and the summer camp she had planned to build there. She’d almost forgotten about it, but there was still the desire to bring her father’s dream to life.
To give my children a part of their father’s and grandfather’s legacies
. Coming to that conclusion, Charleigh scooped the vegetables over into bowls.

She thought about Davison and Associates and how she didn’t want a thing to do with that company. She hadn’t wanted it when Greg first told her she had majority ownership, and she especially didn’t want it now. There were the overseas partners and Fredrick Mac
Millan’s office in Dallas. Once the camp was built, she’d approach them with the idea of buying out her interest in the company.

Once supper was ready, Charleigh took down two plates, two glasses, and two set of utensils, and she set placemats out on the island for her and Cordell. Looking at her watch, she realized the man had been working for almost two hours, and she hadn’t heard a single sound come from upstairs. Charleigh knew how hard he worked, and she knew he was the kind of worker who didn’t stop until the job was done. She just wondered how much of the furniture he’d put together.

Putting the dish rag down on the countertop, she headed toward the stairs and up to the nursery. In the hallway, Charleigh saw two of the long, flat boxes were empty and resting up against the wall. These were the ones that had held the pieces for the cribs. She shook her head, with a smile, and took the last few steps to the doorway.

From there, she saw a pretty amazing sight. Both of the carved mahogany cribs were assembled. They were positioned at an angle with Cordell seated on the floor between. His attention was focused on the matching changing table currently under construction. A rocking chair completed the group, and it sat a few feet in front of the man. A couple of the teddy bears sat side by side in the seat.

“Wow,” Charleigh said, going over to it. She picked up the bears and sat down in the chair, holding the stuffed animals in her lap. “You got all of this put together in only a couple hours?”

Cordell looked up at her.  “I work fast.” A smile brightened his face. “My mama always used to have to tell me to slow down and take my time. I just like to get the job done and done right.”

“You sound like my dad,” Charleigh told him, smiling as she imagined Mike saying those words.

“Your daddy was a good man,” Cordell say, and continued to tighten one of the bolts on the changing table. “He always did right by you. Which is a whole lot more than I can say for some men.” The smile faded from his face. A pain flickered in the man’s eyes as he turned back to the project.

A part of Charleigh knew he was speaking of his own father. She hadn’t known Cord before he went to work on Madie’s ranch. Still, because he lived such a quiet life, she didn’t know much about him after then, either. His mother had died a short time before that, Charleigh recalled, but couldn’t remember a thing about his dad. That was the reason for the pained look, she supposed.

“My mama was a good-natured lady, though, like you,” Cord spoke softly, not looking up. “St
rong-willed and stubborn, too. That’s how I know you’ll be just fine.”

“I appreciate your confidence in me,” Charleigh told him. “What was she like, your mother?”
             

“Kind, smart, beautiful. Her only fault was her taste in slackers. Like my father.” He shrugged but kept working. “He left when I was six. Walked out the backdoor one morning to go to work, and never came back. My mama never quite got over it.

“It wasn’t an accident, no matter they say, the night Clarabelle Allan died. I watched her stare at that backdoor every day for twelve years after that loser walked out on us, and that’s all the proof I need. She just couldn’t stand the loneliness anymore, I suppose. She was so unhappy, and there was nothing I could do to change that.”

“It wasn’t that she didn’t love you, though, Cordell,” Charleigh told him, hoping her voice sounded convincing. “Take it from someone who knows. I miss Jamie with everything in me, but
nothing
could ever make me feel anything but love for the children we created together. Maybe our two situations are just that, but nothing will ever make me love them any less. Your mother felt the same way about you.”

“I guess you’re right.” It was his way of casting the issue aside.

When the last of the changing table was assembled, Cord stood up. With his head cocked to one side, he backed away from it for a moment before coming back to test its sturdiness. He gave a satisfied nod.

“So, what do you think?” He asked, looking over at Charleigh with his big, blue eyes, and smile.

“I think it’s amazing,” she replied, looking around the room at all of the beautiful furniture. “Thank you so much.”

“It was nothing. Madie asked me, and so I did.” After taking another long look at Charleigh, Cordell began to gather up his tools and put them away.

“Still, I appreciate,” she replied, getting up from the rocker. “Are you hungry?”

“Nah.” Cordell shook his head as he left the room a few steps ahead of Charleigh. “I can fix myself something later when I get back home.”

She took a deep breath, nodding as she followed Cord down the hall. A feeling of disappointment settled in Charleigh’s heart at the thought of spending the rest of the night in her big house all alone. Maybe she’d been alone in the kitchen, fixing supper while he’d been up in the nursery, but the point was that the house hadn’t felt quite so lonely in those short couple of hours. It had felt like before, when her life hadn’t so empty and quiet.

“Yeah. Okay, but would you at least let me put a plate together that you can take home with you?” Charleigh asked as they stood face to face at the front door. “There’s so much food, and it’ll just go to waste if you don’t take some of it home. And it’s just
… I don’t know. I wish I had somebody to talk to. Somebody to just listen, I guess.”

Cordell watched Charleigh intently. He knew what she meant because sometimes he felt the exact same way. It got lonely in his little cottage that was tucked away on the Matthews ranch. All the rest of the ranch hands had families. Wives, girlfriends, children. All Cord had was himself.

He got the occasional supper invitation from some of the guys who worked on the ranch. Madie and Lenore were always preparing food for him. Sometimes he went up at The Rusty Wheel to toss back a few, play pool, and just fool around. Not to mention the ladies he occasionally spent the night with. But when it was all over and done, he was still alone.

The sadness in Charleigh’s eyes pulled at Cordell’s heartstrings. It was so much different from the light her emerald green eyes used to hold. Then again, as he knew from personal experience, heartbreak could pale the shine of any soul, break any spirit. Looking at her now, Charleigh Randall didn’t appear to be the same rugged tomboy from even a few months before but as a bird with a wounded
wing.

What would an hour spent eating good food in the company of a pretty lady take away from Cordell’s night? What would he rather be doing? Losing a few bucks over a game of pool at The Rusty Wheel? Sitting at home alone in front of the television? Eating an old bologna sandwich on stale bread and a beer? Was there anything waiting on him back at Missus Matthews’s ranch besides a dark, empty cottage? Of course not. So what was it going to hurt?

“Do you season the meat with crushed pepper the way your daddy used to?” Cord asked with a smile, setting his toolbox on the floor at the end of the couch.

Charleigh returned the smile. “Who do you think taught me how to cook?”

“I hate you, Gavin. I hate you,” Charleigh seethed as he led her down a long hallway. 

She knew that much only because he told her so. Where exactly that hallway was located, and why they were there, were the important parts he and his accomplice had left out. There was a black handkerchief tied around her head, blocking out all daylight. Gavin held Charleigh’s hands gently in his own as he guided her along.

“That’s nothing new,” Brad laughed from behind. He kept Charleigh steady with one hand on each of her shoulders. “I wonder if she can stil
l take you, even though she’s got a couple of buns in the oven. I got twenty bucks that says she can.”

“Why don’t ya’ll let me go, and we can find out?” Charleigh offered, hopeful. She agreed with her ex’s best friend. It wouldn’t take much to have him on his knees.

“Um, no.” Was Gavin’s only answer.

Brad laughed again. “Why not, dude? Are you scared?”

“Oh, shut up, man. You know they’ll kill me if we don’t get her there in time.”

“Who’s ‘they’?” She gulped. “This is kidnapping; I hope you guys know that you could go to jail for a very long time.”

“It is not, Charleigh. You’ll find out soon enough. Stop having a cow.”

“I’m not having a cow. You’re the ones who’s gonna
feel like he’s having the cow when my foot is lodged up your butt.” The threat wasn’t as believable as Charleigh would have liked it to be.

She heard the sound of a door with squeaky hinges being opened. Nervously chewing on her bottom lip, Charleigh locked her knees, not wanting to go any further. With the blindfold over her eyes, there was no way of knowing what was on the other side of that threshold.

              “Come on,” Gavin said, gently pulling on her hands. Charleigh only shook her head.

             
“Go.” Brad told her a little more forcefully. He let out a heavy sigh when she didn’t budge and scooped her up in his brawny arms. “God, girl. You’ve gotten fat.”

             
“Oh, ha, ha, ha!” Charleigh let out an exaggerated laugh. “I’m pregnant, but you’ve always been fat, Brad. So, what’s you’re excuse?”

He didn’t answer the question. Instead, he carried her several feet inside the room and sat her down in a chair. “Now, you have to promise not to scream when I take this thing off, okay?”

“Yeah, fat chance,” Charleigh answered, but Brad removed the blindfold anyway.

When she opened her eyes, Charleigh could see several blurry figures standing a few feet in front of her. It took a long moment for her vision to focus. At last, she could see clearly but was confused to find all of her friends and family were there. After another moment, Charleigh realized that they were all in the communion hall at the church.

“Surprise!” Everybody yelled at the same time.

“What in the world is going on here?” Charleigh asked nobody in particular. She looked from Gavin to Brad, who were still standing close by where she sat.

“It’s your baby shower,” Gavin explained, wearing a pleased look on his face.

“Oh, surprise, honey,” Madie exclaimed again. She came over and pulled Charleigh up into a hug.

“Wow, this is definitely a surprise,” the young woman said. Her chin rested on the old woman’s shoulder, but her eyes were still focused on Gavin’s face. She shot him an angry look, still fuming because of the way she‘d arrive to the party. In return, Gavin gave her an innocent smile.
I told them that I didn’t want a baby shower. Obviously, some people need to have their hearing checked.

When Madie finally released her, Charleigh looked around the room at all of the people. Her granddad was there. Uncle Josh and Aunt Carrie. Even Aunt Denise was there, which was a surprise in itself. All of her cousins. Not to mention all of Jamie’s family was there, including Jenna and Kevin. Everyone who worked at the clinic.

Half the people who lived in Magnolia appeared to be present in the room.

The room was decorated with light blue, yellow, and green streamers and balloons. Some of the balloons were filled with helium and secured to chairs and tables with ribbon. Others were floating freely in the air. Even more were scattered around on the floor. There were teddy bears setting all over the place. A banner with the words ‘Congratulations, Charleigh!!!’ hung from the ceiling. Presents were piled high on a long, rectangular table, and even more were on the tiled floor.

At that moment, Charleigh felt a twinge of gratitude pull at her heart. The anger evaporated.

“You did all of this for me?” she asked, looking from Madie to Gavin, and then to the large crowd who still watched her every move. Tears caught in her throat.

“Well, of course we did,” Mellisande spoke up, stepping out from the middle of the group. “It’s because we love you so much, darling.”

“Oh, Nana,” Charleigh cried out, reaching out to hug her. “I didn’t think you could make it in for my birthday.”

“Well, Pop and I might’ve told a tiny fib,” her grandmother whispered against her hair. “We wouldn’t have missed this for the world.”

“Pop? Where’s he?”

“Right here, cowgirl.” Grant placed a large hand on her shoulder.

“Aw, I can’t believe you planned all this. Getting these guys to kidnap me and all. Never knew Gavin could keep a secret.”

“Do what?” Madie, Mellisande, and Grant asked in unison. They turned to look at the two young men.

“Well, I can think of one other secret Gavin kept besides this one,” Brad mumbled awkwardly. “Ooh, is that cake?” He turned and hurried away from the group.

***

After the party was over and Gavin had delivered Charleigh and her gifts home safely, she sat in the middle of the large living room, looking at all of the pictures. Madie and Lenore had had the pictures developed at Wal-Mart’s one-hour photo lab in Durant, and then Jenna and Kevin brought them out to her.

Do I really look that big?
Charleigh smiled as she looked at one picture of herself unwrapping packages.

Setting the stack of pictures aside, Charleigh got up and went over to take two photo albums from the top of the television armoire. Opening the first one, she saw a picture of Jamie and herself at the engagement party in Madie’s backyard. His face had been black and blue from the run-in he’d had with Gavin a few days before. They were sitting together at the table with Lenore, Greg, Madie, and John. She had been looking up at him, laughing at something he’d said. Jamie was smiling at Jenna as she took the picture.

“I look like a retard in this one,” Charleigh had said a few days after the party as they had looked through the pictures together.

“I think you look amazing,” Jamie had told her and kissed her cheek.

In her mind, Charleigh could still remember what he’d said to make her crack up. It still made her laugh, thinking back.
“Charleigh says they taste like burnt funnel cake,” Jamie had said after Lenore made a comment about how beautifully the centerpieces had turned out.

She continued flipping through the rest of the photographs until the end. After that, Charleigh started on the second one. The first half of the album was filled with pictures from the party Greg and Claudia had given for them at The Plaza. The other half was blank; where she planned to put the pictures from the baby shower.

A professional photographer had been hired to take pictures of that evening. Charleigh didn’t recognize eighty-five percent of the people in them, unless they happened to be famous or kin to her and Jamie. Most likely, she thought,
they were somehow associated with Claudia.

Close to the back, there was one photo of Jamie and Charleigh together, out of more than one-hundred.
Only one!
It was taken of the two of them dancing as the orchestra played,
You Had Me From Hello
.

Charleigh’s cheek was leaned aga
inst Jamie’s shoulder as they swayed. A slight smile played at Jamie’s lips as his chin rested on the top of her head, with his eyes closed. How closely he held her body to his own.

The camera captured the thousands of twinkling rhinestones, without a bit of glare. It looked so magical.

The baby shower had been so much fun. For the first time in a really long time, she let herself enjoy the moment.
It was a happy day
, Charleigh thought, putting each picture into its own empty slot. Even though one important person was missing. Charleigh tried to remember that he was there in spirit, but it still wasn’t the same.

Jamie was supposed to be there for real. Not just in spirit. He was supposed to be there for every little detail. Everything from seeing that second pink line to the two announcements of ‘It’s a boy!’ and their very first cries. He’d been robbed of those moments. They both had. And so much more.

Feeling a faint flutter inside her belly, Charleigh wiped away a tear.
A life has ended, but two more life will soon begin. Cherish them always.
Someone had told her that not too long ago, and she agreed. Charleigh really, truly cherished the short time she’d had with Jamie, and also those two tiny lives living inside her own body, because they were the last connection she had to him. They were the proof of the love she had shared with Jamie. She just didn’t think it was fair.

No. No, she wasn’t going to torment herself anymore like that. Charleigh had grieved for everything that she lost when Jamie died; she was still grieving. It would take some time before the agonizing pain in her heart lessened to a simple sting, but Charleigh knew that she couldn’t keep beating herself up over something that she had in no way been able to control from the start.

As she had told herself many times over the last few months, Charleigh would raise her baby boys as a single mother, using the lessons learned from her own father. Drawing on all her strength, she’d do a dang good job of it, too, and the little guys would grow into strong, confident men.

At that moment, Charleigh felt another quiver, as a tiny hand or foot or head moved inside her body. She touched a hand to her belly and then to her face to wipe away the moisture. This time, they were tears of happiness.