You are a Badass (23 page)
ENVISION YOURSELF WITH THIS MONEY AND THE SPECIFIC THINGS AND/OR EXPERIENCES IT’S GOING TO PROVIDE
As I said, money on its own means nothing. It’s what we attach to it that gives it meaning and inspires us to have it in our lives. It’s what this money makes us feel like that puts us in the proper tizzy to manifest it. Write a mantra that you can run over and over in your mind to help you manifest the money you desire.
I see myself making $150,000 by December 31
st
by being an accountant and serving thirty new clients in the best way possible. I’m so grateful for this $150,000 by December 31
st
that allows me to take my family on a vacation to Bali and renovate our kitchen and donate money to build schools in Kenya. I see myself in the jungle with my kids and my wife; we’re staying at my favorite hotel in Ubud. I feel so happy for being able to give my children this incredible, life-changing experience and for bringing my wife such joy. I can also see the kitchen and how happy it’s made my wife to finally have it. I see the faces of the kids in Kenya as write on the chalkboard in the school I’ve helped pay for. I feel such joy from being able to make a difference in their lives. I’m so grateful for this $150,000 that I will make by December 31
st
. I see the awesome clients I get to work with who are more than happy to pay me $100 an hour for my services. This money is mine, it is on its way to me now, I see it in my bank account and am so grateful for it.
Write one that makes you feel invincible, read it over and over every day, see it and feel it and become a crazy person about it. I know, this sounds like a pain in the ass, but do it anyway because, trust me, it works. Lame, vague goals are the best way to live a lame, vague life. If you want to knock it out of the park, you need to know exactly what you’re shooting for. And be so excited about it that you’re almost annoying to yourself.
TAKE HELL-BENT-FOR-GLORY ACTION
Do every single thing you can think of to manifest this money/new lifestyle. If you’ve got your own business, what new programs could you offer or what new products could you sell? Can you raise your prices? Leverage your time? Sign on bigger and fancier clients? Sell more to the clients you already have? Pick up a part-time job? If you work for someone else, ask for a raise or look for a new job that pays more. Listen to everyone around you with new ears. Is there an opportunity for a new, better paying situation there that you may have not noticed before? Is there a position you can create or suggest that would get you at your desired income level? Continue to do everything humanly possible to magnetize it to you, and then surrender to The Universe and be on the lookout for something unexpected to come in: an inheritance, someone who wants to pay you for your expertise, a brilliant idea that you’d normally pass over as too out of the question, or a conversation between two people looking for someone just like you to help redesign their new offices. Look for some opportunity or person to make an appearance that’s not in your usual path of income. You are leaping into a new reality here—it’s not your job to know the
how;
it’s your job to ask for what you want and wait to discover the
how
, then take action.
When the unexpected money or the new job or the big client comes in is up to The Universe. It can literally happen immediately or it can take years. Your job is to do everything you can to manifest it and have unshakable faith that the Universe is moving it toward you in perfect timing.
GET MENTORING
Surround yourself with people who know more than you do. Read about them, study them, hang out with them and hire them. Be on the lookout for the perfect coach or mentor or book or seminar, because when the student is ready, the teacher appears. Pay attention to who and what flies in your radar and learn as much as you can from them.
Love Yourself
And you will have it all.
Surrender to what is. Say “yes” to life and see how life suddenly starts working for you, rather than against you.
—Eckhart Tolle; author, channeler, high priest of being present
Imagine yourself sitting by a window, looking out at a garden on a lovely spring day. You see birds and bees and butterflies merrily flitting about, when all of a sudden, the most beautiful butterfly in the world catches your eye. Its stunning turquoise wings make your heart explode, its joyful flight makes your soul sing, its metamorphosis from wet wormy thing to creature of soaring beauty fills you with inspiration. Suddenly you leap up, overcome and crazed with a fierce desire;
it must be mine mine mine!
You sprint to the closet, grab your net, sneak outside and tiptoe through the tulips, stalking your beloved prey, all senses alert, focused, determined, tenacious, swinging your net over your head as you chase your butterfly around the garden. You chase it
for hours and hours, but all you seem to be able to do is scare it off, rather than catch it. It’s only when you stop trying so desperately, relax, breathe, and surrender your desire to The Universe that the butterfly of your dreams calmly comes and lands on your nose.
When we want something so, so badly and are working tirelessly to get it, if we don’t surrender, we end up pushing it away instead. There comes a point where we need to hand the job over to The Universe. This doesn’t mean that we give up or discontinue taking action. This means we let go
energetically
, release our kung fu grip and create some space for what we want to come to us. It’s about allowing instead of forcing. It’s about releasing and trusting that if it’s in alignment with our life’s purpose, it will come back to us (or that something or someone even more perfect will come in its place). It’s about surrendering and letting The Universe do its thing while holding faith that our highest desire will come into our lives.
Your faith in The Universe must be stronger than your fear of not getting what you want.
It’s like hiring someone to clean your house so you can focus on the other work you enjoy doing. You explain in detail what they’re supposed to do, show them where the broom is, tell them you’ll beat them to death if they break the ceramic mugs your niece made for you, but you trust them with the job. If you’re constantly hovering over them and grabbing the sponge out of their hands—
here, let me do that!
—they’ll never get their work done and you’ll stay in overwhelmed struggle, preventing yourself from reaping the benefits that inspired you to hire your cleaning crew in the first place.
Surrendering is the part where you hand the job over to The Universe.
What often happens is that, regardless of our best intentions and hard work, we’re trying to control our circumstances by using our limiting beliefs and old patterns. We think that we need to try and
take charge
of the situation (fear based thinking) instead of having faith and gratitude and
allowing
The Universe to deliver (love based thinking). In short, we think we can do a better job of manifesting than The Universe can.
Imagine that someone invites you to a party. They’re all excited about their big old rager, are fully certain that it’s going to be awesome and are truly delighted by the thought of having you come. They extend the invite with much glee and merriment and a deep desire to see you there but with zero pressure—they know if you come it will be awesome, they know if you don’t come it will be awesome. Their party is going to rock. They believe this in their hearts. It is the truth.
Now imagine that someone else invites you to a different party. This person demands that you come, acts like their party will be a gigantic failure unless you show up and reminds you that they came to your last party so you have to come to theirs. They are whiney, manipulative, controlling, a big fat drag. They know they can have an awesome party, and really believe they can, but have decided that it all depends on you coming.
Both people can do the same exact things to prepare: decorate their houses, buy the cheese plates, get the booze, order the ice sculptures, but one person is much more likely to manifest what they want—you showing up and actually wanting to be there—than the
other because they have surrendered. Surrendering isn’t about what you do, but who you’re being as you do it.
Your life is your party. You get to choose how you invite people and experiences and things into it.
If you’re broke as a joke, it’s not about working until you’re half dead to make ends meet and whining about your pathetic situation. It’s about showing up everyday with an excellent attitude, doing your best, leaning back, celebrating what is and steadily working with the grateful expectation and belief that The Universe is sending you a new, more lucrative opportunity.
If you’re single, it’s not about boo-hooing the fact that you can’t find someone good or half-heartedly forcing yourself to go on a million dates. It’s about keeping your desire strong and your faith unwavering, brushing your hair and teeth, leaving the house, flirting your ass off, joyfully going about your life and being grateful that not only is the person you’re seeking also seeking you, but that The Universe is conspiring to bring you together.
Doubt is resistance, faith is surrender. Worry is resistance, joy is surrender. Control is resistance, allowing is surrender. Ridicule is resistance, believing is surrender.
Energy needs to flow or else it stagnates. Surrendering puts you in the flow.
Not only does surrendering create the space to manifest your desires, but it opens you up to manifest good feeling experiences and things that are presently outside your realm of awareness (a.k.a miracles).
As I mentioned before, when you’re moving into a new, awesome life that you’ve never lived in before, you can’t expect to know
how
to
get there because it’s new territory, so you can only do that which you already know how to do and stay open to discovering the new
how
. Likewise, you need to be open to the fact that you may not know exactly what your new reality will look like because you’ve never seen it before. You’re only able to envision that which is already known to you, so the mind-bogglingly awesome new life may be out of your scope of imagination, and by stubbornly holding on to the exact vision of what you want instead of surrendering, you set yourself up to miss out entirely on the very thing you’re looking for. Sometimes your new reality will look just as you pictured it, sometimes totally different (and way better).
Here’s the basic breakdown on how to surrender:
• Get crystal clear on what you desire to manifest
• See it, feel it, taste it, fall in love with it, believe it is already here
• Decide you will have it
• Inform The Universe of your intention by behaving and thinking
as if you already have it
• Meditate, connect with infinite possibility, your intuition and Source Energy
• Take hell-bent joyful, passion-fueled action
• Be grateful that it’s yours, that it’s already here
• Breathe, let it go, let it in
When you believe that everything you desire already exists, you are in a natural state of surrender.
Surrendering is the free-falling backwards into the unknown and trusting that The Universe will catch you. And this can’t be done from a place of lack or a place of mistrust—
OK, I’m releasing, you better come through beotch!
—you have to give it all you’ve got and totally let it go for reals, you must fall back, have faith, be grateful, and wait. And while you’re at it . . .
Love Yourself
And the Motherlode shall bestow her magic upon you.
God will not have his work made manifest by cowards.
—Ralph Waldo Emerson; fearless writer/poet, highly-skilled spewer and doer
I have a friend who had the word “Duh” tattooed on the inside of her upper arm in homage to the fact that all of our big ah-ha moments are no-brainers; “Fear is a choice!” “I am lovable!” “Don’t worry, be happy!” Every time she high-fives, or lifts her arm to see if she needs a shave, she gets reminded of how often the sublime lies waiting in the obvious.
You know countless of these truisms of which I speak, you’ve heard them or thought them a million times, but when they finally sink in and you “get it,” they suddenly become earth-shattering news.
An epiphany is a visceral understanding of something you already know.
Once something moves from our brains to our bones, that’s when we can use it to change our lives.
The million-dollar question is, will we?
Oh, the years people spend talking the talk, rolling out the shoulds, woulds and coulds, attending classes, trolling the seminar circuit, and burying themselves in all sorts of shelf-helpery before they finally, if ever, DO anything with it all.
There’s a statistic that says only 5 percent of people who sign up for something, like a course or a seminar, actually do anything with it. And this includes very, very, very high-priced somethings, not just the money-management class at the community college down the road. This is because lots of people wish for change, really, really want it, are willing to invest the time and money into it, but are ultimately not willing to get uncomfortable enough to actually make anything happen. Which means they don’t want it as badly as they say they do.
“I tried” is the poor man’s “I kicked butt.”
