Worth the Risk (17 page)

‘Steady angel.’ He lifted his head, his breathing ragged as he stared at her, his hand moving downwards.

‘Sean, please…’

‘Not yet…’ He slid down further inside the sleeping bag and she gasped as she felt the warmth of his tongue touch her sensitised breasts. Heat flooded her cheeks as his hand slid further down still and found what he was searching for, his fingers stroking her with wicked intimacy.

‘Please…’ She was writhing under his skilled touch and he lifted his head, his eyes glittering as they focused on her glazed eyes.

‘I’ve wanted you for so long…’

‘I want you, too…’ She was going to die. If he didn’t make love to her soon she was definitely going to die.

He paused for a moment, his jaw tense. ‘Are you protected?’

She hesitated briefly and then nodded. It would be all right. It was totally the wrong time of the month and she wanted this man. Oh, she wanted him so badly.

This time when he held her she felt the power of his arousal, felt him part her legs and take her mouth again in a kiss that reflected the wild hunger between them.

He entered her with a powerful thrust, and she thought her sudden cry of pain had been lost in his mouth as the heat and the agony mingled inside her. But he must have felt her sudden tension because he froze and lifted his head.

‘Ally?’ He stared at her in utter confusion and she shook her head, sliding her hands over his hard buttocks to stop him withdrawing.

‘No! Don’t stop…’

‘Stop? You think I’m Superman?’ He gave a soft groan and kissed the tip of her nose, obviously fighting his hunger for her. ‘I don’t think I could stop if you begged me but that doesn’t mean I want to hurt you.’

‘You’re not hurting me now. It was just for a second.’ She gasped and stroked a hand over his satiny flesh. ‘Please, Sean…’

His breathing was laboured. ‘Why the hell didn’t you say something?’

‘It’s not relevant.’

He moved slightly and frowned as her nails curled into his skin. ‘Relax, sweetheart. It won’t hurt if you relax. Trust me angel.’

So she did. And once she relaxed the pain went, and Sean stayed very still, kissing her gently, nibbling and licking at her lips until she was desperate for more. With a mew of impatience she shifted under him and he gave a sharp intake of breath and captured her face in his hand, forcing her to look at him. And then she felt him move inside her, powerful and male yet still touchingly careful with her. He held her gaze, watching her intently, and then with a grunt he dropped his head onto her shoulder and scooped up her hips so that they were joined even more closely.

‘Oh, Sean!’ The closeness was like nothing she’d ever felt before, but like everything she’d ever dreamed of in all her secret fantasies. The feelings overwhelmed her and instinctively she wrapped her legs around him, his harsh breathing confirming just how much control it was taking for him to hold back.

But she didn’t want him to hold back. Not any more. The pain had gone, and with it any shyness and inhibition she might have had. She wanted it all, everything he could give, and she was ready to give back in full measure. She stroked her hand teasingly up his back and moved her hips under his, feeling a thrill of excitement as she felt him respond.

‘You’re a witch.’ He kissed her again, his tongue delving deeply inside her, and she moved restlessly under him.

‘Sean, please…’ Her sob of need was trapped by his searching mouth and he growled deep in his throat and thrust deeply inside her.

‘Better?’

‘Oh, yes!’ She arched towards him, their bodies moving as one until the pressure burst and her cries of fulfilment mingled with his harsh groan as he shuddered against her.

Tears seeped from under her closed lids and she heard him give a muffled curse, before wrapping her in his arms and rolling them both so that she lay almost on top of him.

‘I’m sorry, sweetheart.’ His voice was a groan of apology. ‘I was too rough.’

‘No.’ Her voice was little more than a whisper and he stroked the blonde hair away from her damp cheek and ran a thumb over her bottom lip. ‘You weren’t rough.’

His grip on her tightened. ‘I made you cry, for heaven’s sake.’

She turned her head and gave him a watery smile. ‘Because you made it so fantastic, and I never guessed it would ever feel like that.’

He stared at her for a long moment and then closed his eyes briefly. ‘There’s so much you need to tell me but somehow I just don’t want to hear it yet.’

That was fine by her. She snuggled closer into the warmth of his body, her smooth skin sliding over his rougher, muscled thighs.

‘Carry on like that and we won’t get any sleep tonight,’ Sean warned, his mouth tantalisingly close to hers.

Her heart raced. ‘Who needs sleep?’

He stared at her and his mouth curved into the sexiest smile she’d ever seen. ‘Who, indeed…’

CHAPTER EIGHT

T
HEY
were up at first light, packing up the tent and the rest of the gear and struggling into their walking clothes.

Sean didn’t say much as they walked down the mountain and, staring at his massive shoulders leading the way down the narrow path, Ally felt a twinge of disquiet. Something was wrong. After the intimacy they’d shared during the night he should have been holding her hand or casting her the odd tender smile. Instead, his hard features were set and grim, his whole attitude one of single-minded intent as he concentrated on getting them down the mountain.

Part of her longed to put her arms round him and tell him how much she loved him, but pride stopped her. This was Sean, after all, and she knew he kept his emotions firmly in check. Except for last night. Her body warmed as she remembered the details of the night before. How he’d held her, touched her, driven them both to incredible heights of sensation and emotion. But he’d never mentioned love.

Had the emotion been all hers and not his? Had she imagined the soft way he’d spoken and touched her? Maybe that was all part of his seduction technique. Oh, heck, what was the matter with her? She lifted her chin and walked a little more briskly. She’d known all along that Sean didn’t want emotional involvement—he’d made it clear enough, hadn’t he? So what had she expected? That he’d drop on one knee and declare undying love?

Yes, she admitted miserably, suddenly stopping dead and staring at the path in front of her. That was exactly what she’d expected, or at least hoped for. But it had just been a fantasy. It wasn’t going to be like that. Sean’s rule was no commitment and she’d thought she could play by that rule, but she’d been wrong. She couldn’t have a short-lived affair with this man. One night had been bad enough. The memories left her breathless, desperate for more, and she knew that time would just make it worse for her.

She just wasn’t the sort of person who could have a fling, have fun while it lasted and then move on to someone else. She was a constant person, someone who believed that when you loved someone it was for ever. And she loved Sean.

‘Are you all right?’

She blinked, suddenly aware that Sean had stopped and was frowning down at her.

‘I’m fine.’

‘Are you hurt or something?’

Part of her wanted to scream at him. Of course she was hurt! How could he possibly not understand that? She was in agony. It depressed her to admit just how self-contained and controlled he was this morning. Didn’t he care at all, for goodness’ sake? Obviously not. Well, push on, Ally, she told herself grimly. Just get home and then you can work out what you’re going to do.

She summoned up a casual smile that cost her more in effort than the entire walk had. ‘I’m fine. Just admiring the view.’

For a brief second she thought she saw a shadow flit across his face and then it was gone.

‘Good. Let’s crack on, then.’

She followed him on autopilot, her legs feeling like lead as she picked her way over the rocks towards the bottom of the valley.

They met Jack, coming up. His eyes gleamed when he saw them.

‘Just checking up on you.’

Sean gave him a wry look. ‘Go on, say it. What the hell were we playing at?’

Jack laughed and rested a foot on a rock, surveying the view with obvious pleasure. ‘Enjoying yourselves, I imagine.’

Ally blushed furiously. ‘Sorry, Jack.’

‘What for?’ Jack shrugged and fell into step beside her. ‘You didn’t drag me out of my bed.’

‘We must have worried you.’

Jack glanced across at Sean. ‘Can’t say you did, really. If I had to get lost on a mountain with someone and it couldn’t be Jennifer Aniston, I suppose I’d be glad it was Sean.’

Ally stared at Sean, her eyes skimming over his powerful physique, remembering the way he’d made love to her—despite everything, she was glad it had been Sean, too…

‘Can I give you a lift home?’ Jack gestured towards his van in the car park, but Sean shook his head and caught Ally’s arm in a vice-like grip.

‘No, thanks. We need to sort out this gear and have a debrief.’

‘A debrief?’ Ally glanced over her shoulder and waved as Jack pulled away, before turning back to Sean who was unlocking his car.

He gave a wry smile and heaved their gear into the boot. ‘I think we’ve got things to talk about, don’t you?’

Somehow that didn’t sound very lover-like and Ally’s mouth dried. If he was regretting last night then she certainly didn’t want him to spell it out. She was much too tired for a confrontation.

They both climbed into the car and Sean started the engine, his breath clouding the freezing air until the interior of the car slowly warmed up.

Finally he turned towards her, a muscle working in his cheek. ‘Right, then. Confession time.’

‘Confession?’ Ally blinked, confused. This wasn’t what she’d expected. ‘What do you mean, confession?’

He frowned impatiently. ‘Oh, come on, Ally! Don’t play more games. How come I found myself making love to a virgin instead of a woman with a child of five?’

Her heart was thundering in her chest. He seemed angry. Why would that make him angry? ‘Why does it matter?’

‘Because you lied to me, dammit!’ He slammed the palm of his hand against the steering-wheel and drew a deep breath, obviously controlling his temper with difficulty. ‘OK. Let’s start at the beginning. Who the hell is Charlie’s real mother, then?’

‘My sister.’

There was a long silence and then he turned to look at her, his expression baffled.

‘Your sister?’ He shook his head slightly as if to clear it. Obviously he was also suffering from the total lack of sleep. ‘The one who died?’

Ally nodded. ‘She was madly in love with Rob, even though she knew he didn’t care that much about her.’

‘Hold on, let me get this straight.’ He rubbed his temples with those long, strong fingers and took a deep breath. ‘Rob was her boyfriend, not yours?’

‘That’s right.’

‘And she got pregnant?’

‘It was an accident.’ Ally stared out of the window, not seeing the outline of the fells that she loved so much. All she could see was her sister’s face. ‘She rang me and told me and she was so thrilled—you can’t imagine.’

Sean’s voice was rough. ‘Even knowing that Rob was a louse?’

‘Even knowing that.’ Ally’s tone was soft and wistful and she glanced down at her fingers, surprised to find them tangling in her jacket. ‘Needless to say, Rob didn’t hang around.’

‘But she carried on with the pregnancy?’ He sounded surprised and Ally rounded on him, her eyes challenging.

‘Of course she carried on with it!’ Her blue eyes blazed. ‘We’re like that in our family, you see. We love babies and children. We believe totally in marriage and commitment, and if something does go wrong we all stick together. No way would Fay have had a termination. She knew we’d all rally round and help out.’

‘So what happened?’ The hard edge had gone from his voice and Ally closed her eyes and shook her head.

‘The crazy thing is, I don’t even really know—it was so quick. One day we were shopping together for baby things and she was telling me how well she was and how excited, the next we had a call from the consultant at the hospital, whom I knew vaguely, telling me that she’d been admitted and was in a critical state.’

Sean frowned. ‘With what?’

‘Pre-eclampsia.’ Ally stared at her fingernails. ‘Seems daft, doesn’t it? People still dying of pre-eclampsia in this day and age, but that was what happened. Her blood pressure shot up, her liver enzymes were all over the place, she went into massive liver failure and died. It was so quick.’

Sean hesitated. ‘I’m sorry.’

Ally shrugged and blinked away the tears. ‘Yes, well, they delivered the baby, obviously, hoping that it would improve her condition, but it made no difference.’

‘So you were left with a tiny baby with no mother or father.’

Ally’s jaw clenched. ‘Not exactly. Rob appeared on the scene once he found out what had happened.’

‘He wanted the baby?’ Sean sounded surprised and Ally’s laugh was bitter.

‘No.’ Her fingers curled into her jacket as she fought to control her anger. ‘He wanted money. And plenty of it.’

‘Money?’ Sean’s eyes narrowed. ‘What for?’

‘For letting us keep the baby.’

There was a long silence and then the breath hissed through his teeth. ‘Let me get this straight. The guy wanted you to pay him for leaving you alone—is that right?’

‘In a nutshell.’

Sean gave her an odd look. ‘And knowing you, I’ll bet you gave it to him.’

She held his gaze defiantly. ‘Of course I did. What choice did I have? She was Fay’s baby. I couldn’t let him take her. He was threatening to have her adopted.’

For a moment he was silent, his expression unreadable. ‘So what did you do?’

‘What do you think?’ Ally turned her head away from his and stared back out of the window. ‘I paid him every penny he asked for.’

Sean shook his head slowly, disbelief written all over his features. ‘And your parents agreed?’

‘They didn’t know.’ Ally’s expression was blank. ‘They still don’t. They were so devastated by Fay’s death, the last thing they needed was to battle for Charlie as well. I used all the savings I had and—well, Will helped me. I just wanted that rat away from my family.’