Works of Ivan Turgenev (Illustrated) (405 page)

NATALYA PETROVNA. Tell me.

RAKITIN. Promise that you won’t suspect my motives. Tell me that you believe in my disinterested desire to help you; do you help me too. Let your confidence give me strength, or else let me keep silence.

NATALYA PETROVNA. Speak, speak.

RAKITIN. You have no doubt of me?

NATALYA PETROVNA. Speak!

RAKITIN. Well then, listen, he must go away. [NATALYA PETROVNA
looks at him in silence.’]
Yes, he must go. I’m not going to speak to you of... your husband, your duty. On my lips, such words are . . . out of place. . . . But those children love each other. You told me so yourself just now, imagine yourself now between them. . . . Why, your position will be awful!

NATALYA PETROVNA. He must go. ...
[A pause.]
And you? You remain?

RAKITIN
[confused].
I?... I?...
[Apause.]
I must go too. For the sake of your peace, your happiness, Verotchka’s happiness, both he ... and I ... we must both go away for ever.

NATALYA PETROVNA. Rakitin ... I have sunk so low that I ... was almost ready to sacrifice that poor girl, an orphan entrusted to me by my mother, to marry her to a stupid, absurd old man! I couldn’t bring myself to it, Rakitin, the words died away on my lips when she burst out laughing at the suggestion . . . but I have been plotting with the doctor; I have put up with his meaning smiles, I have borne with his grins, his compliments, his hints. . . . Oh, I feel I am on the brink of a precipice; save me!

RAKITIN. Natalya Petrovna, you see that I am right.. . .
[She is silent; he goes on hurriedly.]
He ought to go ... we ought both to go. ... There is no other way to save you.

NATALYA PETROVNA
[dejectedly].
But what to live for afterwards?

RAKITIN Good God, is it as bad as that? . . . Natalya Petrovna, you will get over it, believe me. . . . This will pass. What, nothing to live for!

NATALYA PETROVNA. Yes, yes, what have I to live for when all abandon me?

RAKITIN. But . . . your family. . . . [NATALYA PETROVNA
looks down.]
If you like, after he is gone, I might stay a few days j ust to . . .

NATALYA PETROVNA
[gloomily].
Ah! I understand. You are reckoning on habit, on our old friendship. . . . You hope I shall come to myself, and turn to you again, don’t you? I understand you.

RAKITIN
[flushing].
Natalya Petrovna! Why do you insult me?

NATALYA PETROVNA
[bitterly].
I understand you . . . but you are mistaken.

RAKITIN. What? After your promise, when simply for your sake, your sake only, for your happiness, for your position in society, in fact. . .

NATALYA PETROVNA. Oh! how long have you been concerned about that? Why is it you have never spoken of it before?

RAKITIN
[getting up].
Natalya Petrovna, I will leave this place to - day, at once, and you shall never see me again. . . .
[Is going.]

NATALYA PETROVNA
[stretching out her hands to him].
Michel, forgive me; I don’t know what I’m saying. . . . You see the state I’m in. Forgive me.

RAKITIN
[turning rapidly to her and taking her by the hands].
Natalya Petrovna . . .

NATALYA PETROVNA. Oh, Michel, I’m unutterably miserable. . . .
[Leans on his shoulder and presses her handkerchief to her eyes.]
Help me, I am lost without you.
[At that instant the door of the outer room is flung open, and
ISLAYEV
and
ANNA SEMYONOVNA
walk in.]

ISLAYEV
[loudly].
I was always of that opinion.
[Stops in amazement at the sight of
RAKITIN
and
NATALYA PETROVNA. NATALYA PETROVNA
looks round and goes out
quickly.
RAKITIN
remains where he is, overwhelmed with confusion.]

ISLAYEV
[to
RAKITIN]. What’s the meaning of this? What’s this scene?

RAKITIN. Oh . . . nothing . . . it’s . . .

ISLAYEV. Is Natalya Petrovna unwell?

RAKITIN. No . . . but. . .

ISLAYEV. And why has she run away so suddenly? What were you talking about? She seemed to be crying.... You were consoling her... . What’s the matter?

RAKITIN. Nothing really.

ANNA SEMYONOVNA. How can there be nothing the matter, Mihail Alexandritch?
[After a pause.]
I’ll go and see. ...
[Is about to go into the study.,]

RAKITIN
[stopping her].
No, you had better leave her in peace, please.

ISLAYEV. But what does it all mean? Tell us.

RAKITIN. Nothing, I assure you. ... I promise to explain it to you both to - day. I give you my word. But now, please, if you have any trust in me, don’t ask me . . . and don’t worry Natalya Petrovna.

ISLAYEV. Very well. . . but it is strange. This sort of thing has never happened with Natasha before. It’s something quite out of the way.

ANNA SEMYONOVNA. What I want to know is what could make Natasha cry? And why has she gone away? . . . Are we strangers?

RAKITIN. Of course not. What an idea! But as a matter of fact, we had not finished our conversation. . . , I must ask you . . . both -
 
- to leave us alone for a little while.

ISLAYEV. Indeed? There’s some secret between you, then?

RAKITIN. Yes . . . but you shall know it.

ISLAYEV
[after a moment’s thought].
Come along, Mamma. . . . Let us leave them. Let them finish their mysterious conversation.

ANNA SEMYONOVNA. But. . .

ISLAYEV. Come, let us go. You hear he promises to explain.

RAKITIN. You needn’t worry. . .. ISLAYEV
[coldly].
I’m not worrying.
[To
ANNA SEMYONOVNA.] Let us go.
[They go out.]

RAKITIN
[looks after them and goes quickly to the study door].
Natalya Petrovna, Natalya Petrovna, please come back.

NATALYA PETROVNA
[comes out of the study. She is very pale].
What did they say?

RAKITIN. Nothing, don’t worry yourself. . . . They were rather surprised, certainly. Arkady thought you were ill.... He noticed how upset you were. ... Sit down, you can hardly stand. . . . [NATALYA PETROVNA
sits downJ]
I said ... I begged him not to worry you ... to leave us alone. NATALYA PETROVNA. And he agreed? RAKITIN. Yes. I had, I must say, to promise I’d explain it all to - morrow. Why did you go away?

NATALYA PETROVNA
[bitterly].
Why indeed! What are you going to say?

RAKITIN. I’ll . . . I’ll think of something to say. But that’s no matter just now. We must take advantage of this reprieve. You see that this can’t go on. ... These violent emotions are too much for you. . . . They are unworthy of you. ... I myself. . But that’s not the point. Only be firm and I’ll manage. You agreed with me, you know. NATALYA PETROVNA. About what? RAKITIN. The necessity of ... our going. You do agree? If that’s so, it’s no good to delay. If you’ll let me, I’ll talk to Beliayev at once. . . . He’s a decent fellow, he’ll understand.

NATALYA PETROVNA. You want to talk to him? You? But what can you say to him?

RAKITIN
[in embarrassment],
I’ll . . .

NATALYA PETROVNA
[after a brief pause].
Rakitin, listen, don’t you think that we’re both behaving like lunatics? . . . I was in a panic, I frightened you, and perhaps it’s all about nothing that matters.

RAKITIN. What?

NATALYA PETROVNA. Really? What’s the matter with us? It seems only a little while ago everything was so quiet and peaceful in this house . . . and all at once . . . goodness knows how! Really we’ve all gone out of our minds. Come, it’s time to stop, we’ve been silly enough. . . . Let us go on as before. . . . And there’ll be no need to explain anything to Arkady; I’ll tell him about our antics myself and we’ll laugh over them together. I need no one to intercede between my husband and me!

RAKITIN. Natalya Petrovna, you are frightening me now. You are smiling and you’re as pale as death. ... Do remember what you said to me only a quarter of an hour ago. . . .

NATALYA PETROVNA. I dare say! But I see what it is. . . . You’re raising this storm . . . that you may not sink alone.

RAKITIN. Again, again suspicion, again reproaches, Natalya Petrovna. . . . God forgive you . . . but you torture me. Or do you regret having spoken so freely?

NATALYA PETROVNA. I regret nothing.

RAKITIN. Then how am I to understand you?

NATALYA PETROVNA
[eagerly].
Rakitin, if you say a single word from me or about me to Beliayev, I will never forgive you.

RAKITIN. Oh! so that’s it! ... Don’t worry, Natalya Petrovna. So far from telling Mr. Beliayev anything, I won’t even say good - bye to him, when I take my departure. I don’t mean to pester you with my services.

NATAYLA PETROVNA
[with some embarrassment].
You imagine perhaps that I have changed my mind about... his going?

RAKITIN. I imagine nothing.

NATALYA PETROVNA. That’s not so. I’m so convinced of the necessity, as you say, of his leaving that I mean to dismiss him myself.
[A pause.]
Yes, I will dismiss him myself.

RAKITIN. You?

NATALYA PETROVNA. Yes. And at once. I beg you to send him to me.

RAKITIN. What? This minute?

NATALYA PETROVNA. This very minute. I ask you to do so, Rakitin. You see I am composed now. Besides, I shan’t be interrupted just now. I must seize the opportunity. ... I shall be very much obliged to you. I’ll question him.

RAKITIN. But he won’t tell you anything. I can assure you. He admitted to me that he felt awkward with you.

NATALYA PETROVNA
[suspiciously].
Ah! You’ve been talking to him about me. [RAKITIN
shrugs his shoulders.]
Oh, forgive me, forgive me, Michel, and send him to me. You’ll see, I will dismiss him and all will be over. It will all pass and be forgotten, like a bad dream. Please fetch him. I absolutely must have a final conversation with him. You will be pleased with me. Pray do.

RAKITIN
[who has not taken his eyes off her all this time, coldly and mournfully].
Certainly. Your wishes shall be obeyed.
[Goes towards door of outer room.]

NATALYA PETROVNA
[after him].
Thank you, Michel.