Woman of Courage (41 page)

“Ta’c meeywi, manaa wees?”

Buck’s eyelids fluttered, but they would not open. It sounded like someone was speaking to him from a faraway place—saying “Good morning, how are you” in the Nez Percé language. Then the words were replaced with a song … a song he remembered hearing a long time ago. What was this gentle, sweet song, and where had he heard it before?

I am dreaming
, he told himself.
Or maybe I’m dead. If I were alive, I could surely open my eyes
.

As the singing continued, Buck felt like he was floating on a cloud. In his mind’s eye he saw a red-tailed hawk circling the cloud. How nice that his winged brother had come to join him. Perhaps he was leading Buck to the valley of death.

Buck shuddered, and cried out in pain. He wasn’t ready to die yet. He needed to see Amanda, if only one last time. Her name was on the tip of his tongue, but he could not open his mouth to speak it.
Come to me … Come to me, my beautiful woman. I will love you forever, even in death
.

As Gray Eagle urged his stallion toward the mission, he thought about Yellow Bird and how he couldn’t wait to marry her. For many moons he had hoped to have this union become a reality, and he had never given up the thought that one day Yellow Bird would return to him. What a joyous occasion it would be having all their family and friends there to witness their union. He thought about Buck, lying in Two Feather’s lodge, fighting for his life.
I hope my new friend will be there for my wedding. It would be a sad thing if he dies
.

“How much longer until we get there?” the yellow-haired man who rode alongside Gray Eagle asked, pulling his thoughts aside.

“Soon,” Gray Eagle mumbled. He glanced over at White Foot and said in their native tongue, “This man seems very anxious to get to the mission.”

White Foot nodded. “He probably cannot handle the cold. Yellow Hair need to toughen up.”

White Foot was right; it was cold today, but at least it wasn’t snowing like it had been a week ago. The weather could be unpredictable, though, and he was glad the trip to and from the fort had been uneventful.

Gray Eagle glanced back at the yellow-haired man. They’d met him at the fort, when he’d arrived with some fur traders who had led him there. When Gray Eagle heard that the man was looking for someone to show him the way to the Spalding Mission, he’d volunteered to take him. It made sense, since that was where Gray Eagle and White Foot were heading. He wondered now if it had been a mistake when he’d offered to bring this man back with them. Because of this white man, who rode much slower than they did, the journey to the mission was taking longer than it should.

The man, dressed in fancy clothes, talked funny, too. He seemed nervous, like he didn’t really belong here. Gray Eagle had seen a few other white men like him before and wondered why they had ventured this far west. This man, who hadn’t bothered to give them his name, said earlier that he was headed to the mission on important business but didn’t say what. Gray Eagle figured he was probably coming to help the Spaldings teach the Nez Percé about God and how to live like the white man. Or maybe he was their chief and had come to check up on them—see if they were doing things the way he wanted to have them done.

Gray Eagle didn’t mind them teaching his people from the Bible, but it wasn’t right that they expected the Nez Percé to give up many of their customs in favor of the white man’s way of doing things. Some of the Indian women and children who went to the mission had even begun wearing dresses like Amanda and Eliza Spalding wore. It didn’t seem right to see them dressed that way. It went against the heritage of his people. They were learning to read and write in the English language, too. Gray Eagle supposed that wasn’t a bad thing, because if white men were going to share their land, then they needed to be able to communicate with one another.

Gray Eagle’s thoughts halted when the Spaldings’ log structure came into view. “There it is,” he announced to the yellow-haired man. “That is the Spalding Mission.”

Amanda had just put Little Fawn down for a nap, when Mrs. Spalding came into the room and told her that Gray Eagle was outside and wished to speak with her.

“Tell him I’ll be right out.” Amanda leaned over and kissed her daughter’s forehead; then she quietly left the room. She couldn’t imagine why Gray Eagle would want to see her. If he was back from his trip to the fort, it would seem more likely that he’d be asking for Yellow Bird.

Slipping her dark bonnet on her head and wrapping a woolen shawl around her shoulders, Amanda opened the door and stepped out of the cabin. She spotted Gray Eagle standing near his horse, and her heart nearly stopped beating when she noticed the yellow-haired man beside him.

“Nathan Lane! What are you doing here?”

D
ost thou not mean
thee?
” Nathan asked, stepping up to Amanda. “Art thou not still a Quaker?”

“Nathan, why are you here?” Amanda asked without answering his question. “And where is Penelope?”

“She is in New York. We did not get married after all, Amanda.”

“Oh really, and why is that?”

“Because I still love thee.” Nathan opened his arms wide, as though expecting her to accept his embrace. When she took a step back, he dropped his arms to his side. “I am sorry, Amanda. I never meant to hurt thee,” he said. “Canst thou forgive me for breaking our engagement?”

Amanda clasped her hands tightly together to keep them from shaking. She remembered her father saying once that it was important to forgive someone who had wronged you, but that forgiving didn’t mean you had to be in a relationship with them. Sometimes it was best to keep a safe distance from the person who had done you wrong.

“I have already forgiven you,” Amanda said, trying to keep her voice calm. “And you needn’t have come all this way just to ask for forgiveness. You could have sent me a letter.”

Nathan shook his head vigorously. “That would not have been good enough. I needed to see thee in person and try to win thee back.”

“I am not going back,” Amanda said with conviction. “My place is here at the mission, teaching the Nez Percé Indians about Jesus and how to read and write.” She glanced over at Gray Eagle, hoping he might say something, but he was busy putting the horses away.

“I am not asking thee to leave,” Nathan said. “At least not until thy work is done here. I am willing to stay and help thee teach the Indians.”

Amanda hardly knew what to say. In her wildest dreams she’d never expected Nathan to show up at the mission, much less offer to stay and help out.

What does all this mean?
Amanda wondered. She’d thought she had moved on with her life. Was Nathan’s coming here a sign from God that they were supposed to be together? Could she trust Nathan not to break her heart again? And what about Buck? Nathan’s sudden appearance had taken Amanda by surprise. How would he feel once he found out she had a daughter? All these questions whirled in Amanda’s head, making her more confused than ever.

Two Feathers smiled when she touched the young man’s forehead and it felt cool. He had faded in and out of consciousness ever since he’d been brought to her. In part, it had been from his raging fever. Plus, she had kept him sedated. It would not have been good for him to thrash about too much with his broken leg and ribs. Now that the fever had broken, she would ease up on the sedative.

Two Feathers hummed as she stirred a pot of rabbit stew. The tantalizing aroma caused her stomach to growl. She’d been so busy caring for the injured man these past few days that she hadn’t taken time to cook a decent meal.

As Two Feathers took a seat in one corner of her tepee, she thought about Amanda, the young white woman who had come by several times, asking to see him.
Perhaps the next time she comes by I will let her in
, Two Feathers decided.
Maybe this woman means something to him
.

Two Feathers didn’t know why she felt so protective of her patient. It wasn’t like he was a relative or even a friend. Until the day Gray Eagle had brought the man to her tent, she’d never laid eyes on him before.

Two Feathers rose from her mat and returned to the pot of stew, stirring it again and breathing in the delicious aroma. It was almost ready. Perhaps when her patient woke up, he would eat some, too.

As Two Feathers poked the wood on the fire, she began to sing.

Buck opened his eyes and turned his head to one side, curious as to who was singing that chant-like song. He’d heard it before but didn’t know where. As his eyes began to focus, he noticed an Indian woman bent over a heavy dark pot hanging over the fire. Her black hair was streaked with gray, and she wore two white feathers at the ends of her braids.

“Ah, you are finally awake,” the woman said in English, turning to look at him. “I figured the smell of rabbit stew might cause your eyes to open.” She left the pot and moved across the lodge, then knelt beside his mat.

Buck groaned when he tried to move. “Where am I?” he asked, taking short, small breaths. He couldn’t breathe normally because it hurt too much.
Did I get run over by a stampede of buffalo?
Buck wondered.
It sure feels like I did
.

“You are in the Nez Percé camp, just outside the Spalding Mission,” she replied.

“Who are you?” he asked.

“I am a medicine woman. You were brought to me when you fell from your horse.”

Buck winced as a jolt of pain shot through his right side. “I remember now. The trail was icy and covered with snow. My horse slipped on a rock that was hidden under the ice. We went down, and he rolled over on me. The last thing I remember is seeing him stand up, and wondering if I would freeze to death.”

“Your friend Gray Eagle found you and your horse,” the woman said. “It was good he came along when he did, or you would have surely died.” She touched his arm gently. “Your leg and several ribs were broken, and there was a gash on your head. Your body was cold, but the fever was hot. I have been caring for you many days.”

“Thank you. I appreciate that. How’s my horse?”

“Horse had only a small gash, but it has healed,” she answered, reaching out to feel his forehead again.