Where Does My Heart Belong? (19 page)

CHAPTER 47

When
Isabel and I go into the kitchen the next morning, we find it in chaos.  The kids
are screaming and having a food fight.  The men don’t seem to care and are boisterous
and horsing around as well.   When they all see Isabel, there’s an instant
silence.

“What
can I fix you ladies for breakfast?” Luis asks.

“Coffee,
fruit, and toast for me,” Isabel says.

“I’ll
have the same,” I tell him.

Isabel
focuses her gaze on each of her family members, one at a time.  I can almost
feel them squirm.  Gone, is the scared, sobbing woman from last night.  The
family matriarch is back, taking charge. 

After
we finish eating, she turns to them.  “Children, I want you to clean up this food
fight mess.  Then, boys, please go outside and make sure the animals have
enough food and water.  Carmen, I would like you and Angie to do the dishes and
clean up the kitchen, please.  Carlos Antonio, I want to see you in my room.” 

“Hoo,
hoo,” Manny chortles.  “How long has it been since this happened?  What did you
do little brother?”

“Nothing
that I know of,” Tony says as he stares at the floor.  I wonder if Angie told
Isabel about the mustang ranch.  I’ll bet that’s what he’s thinking.  Angie
told me once that whenever someone has been naughty, Isabel takes them into her
room for a talk and deals out their punishment.  Poor Tony, I don’t envy him.

“Don’t
go too far away, Manuel, because when I’m through speaking with your brother,
it’s your turn.”

 “Yes,
ma’am,” he says, not looking at her.

Tony
gets up and follows Isabel to her room.

“Mike
and I are going home to get the big tractor,” Manny says to me.  “We won’t be
gone very long so would you tell Mama where we went and that I’ll be right
back?”

I
tell him that I will and then I help the girls clean up the kitchen.  When Tony
comes back from talking to Isabel, he looks giddy with joy.  That talk must
have been a doozy but he never tells me what they discussed.  I notice that
he’s holding something in his hand.  He tells me that Isabel would like me to
join Manny and him for a talk.  Then he goes to his room, and when he comes
back, there’s no longer anything in his hand.

Once
Manny gets back, we all join Isabel in her room.  She says to me, “Libby, I
want you to hear this since Tony and Angie are living with you.”  Then she lays
into them.

“Ricardo
told me something interesting last night.  Apparently, he’s been asked to be
the best man at a wedding.  It seems that Angelita and Diego are planning
nuptials.   What is this all about?  Do either one of you know what your
children are up to?”

Tony
groans and Manuel is grinning.  “That’s my boy,” he exclaims.

“I
don’t need to tell you what your father is going to do when he hears about this
and he’s not going to hear about it if I can help it.  I’m going to put the
kibosh on this thing right now.  I’ve never told you how to raise your children
but this kind of goings on is not going to happen in my house.”

“Geez,
Mom, they’re just kids, 6 and 8 years old.  What’s the big deal?  They’re just
play acting for Christ’s sake,” Manny tells her.

“Do
not take the Lord’s name in vain.”

“I’m
sorry,” he mutters.

 “The
big deal is that they’re cousins, not blood related as you well know, but if
they blab this around I’m afraid people will think we’re encouraging some sort
of incest here.  I won’t have it.  People outside of the family don’t know that
Tony isn’t Angie’s biological father.”

“I’m
sorry, Mama, I don’t know anything about any wedding plans but I did notice
that they were getting pretty chummy yesterday. We’ll take Angie back to the
city with us,” Tony says. 

“No,
leave her here for the rest of the summer, just like you planned.  Carmen is
staying too.  They’ll be a big comfort to me.   Besides, I think you have other
matters you should be dealing with.  I’ll handle this.  I’m going to separate
those kids.  Manuel, I think Diego needs a job.  I want to put him to work in
the poultry barn, with pay.  Bring him over at 8:00 every morning.   When he’s
done there, he can stay with the Ramirez family until you pick him up.   Alma
Ramirez rules that brood of hers with an iron fist.  She won’t let him get away
with a thing.  If we can keep these kids apart then I hope this whole nonsense
will blow over.  Are you with me on this, Manuel?”

“Yes,
ma’am, whatever you say.”

“Now,
I’m going to call the hospital and see how your father is doing.  I hope he can
come home today.  Luis will drive me and I’d like to take Ricardo and Diego
along.  The rest of you can get that shed roof repaired and plan tonight’s
supper.  Tony if you and Libby will excuse me please, I’d like to talk to
Manuel alone now.”  She gets up and hugs each of us, and tells us she loves us.

 Oh
my, what a woman.   Tony and I go out to the living room.  “Let’s sit down,” he
says.  “Is it okay with you if we stay another night here?  I’d like to spend
some time with my father.”

“Of
course, we can stay as long as you want.  Your family is terrific.   Your
mother is the most wonderful woman I have ever met.  I love her.  You’re so
lucky to have a mother like her.  Oh, here she comes.   I wonder what the
hospital said.”

“José
will be released at noon.  Manuel, take those kids home and get them cleaned
up.  Where’s Luis?” 

“Relax,
Mama, I’ll go find him.  Can I get you something to drink or eat?”

“No
thank you, Tony, just go and get Luis.  I can’t wait to have the love of my
life back home with me.”

Once
Luis and Isabel have left, Tony and I plan the supper.  We decide on roasted
chickens, potato salad, bar-b-que beans, cole slaw, and biscuits.

“We
can cook the chickens and potato salad here.  We’re going to have to go into
town later to get roofing supplies so we can stop at a KFC and buy the beans
and cole slaw.  Let’s make this as easy as possible.  I’ll get the chickens
thawing out and the girls can get the potato salad started.”

“Great,
but what can I do?”

“Just
watch.  I know you don’t cook but Carmen is a whiz.  Luis is a gourmet, if you
can believe that, and he’s taught Carmen everything he knows.  That young girl
could whip a dinner for twenty people in a moments notice if she had to.”

“Wow. 
Your Mom told me she taught all of you to cook.”

“Yep,
but that’s not the only thing.  She taught us how to wash and iron our own
clothes, how to sew, how to clean house and do the yard work.  By the time she
was done with us we could all manage a household as well as she could.”

“I’m
more impressed with her by the minute.  I think I’ll just stay here forever. 
You and Angie can live at Sea Cliff house,” I tease.

“Not
without you, we can’t.” 

After
Isabel gets home with José, the house is in an uproar.  I watch as they all
crowd around him, giving him hugs, and telling him that they love him.  Isabel
sits him down in his recliner and then he looks up and sees me.

"Libby,
come over here and give an old man a hug.  I'm glad you're here.  Isabel told
me what you did for her last night.  Thank you for being there for her."

"I'm
so glad you're okay, José," I say while giving him a hug.  "I loved
being with her last night.  Your wife is the greatest woman that I know."

"I
think so too, but tell me, what's going on between you and that youngest son of
mine?"

"Not
now, José," Isabel interrupts.  "Supper is ready.  Let's eat."

After
supper, we all gather in the living room and I watch the family interact with
each another.  They're all so happy and loving.  I start to feel like I'm going
to cry so I get up and go to the bathroom.  I've only been in there a short
time when someone knocks on the door.  When I open it, it’s Isabel.

"Libby,
you've been crying.  What's wrong, dear, did something happen to upset
you?"

"No,
I've just never been around a loving family like yours before and it got to
me.  I didn't have a nice family life."  She puts her arms around me and
now it's me sobbing in her arms the way she did in mine last night.

"Listen
to me, Libby.  I want you to think of us as your second family and this house
as your second home.  No matter what happens between you and Tony, we'll be
here for you.  I want you to come out here more often.  Girl, I can't teach you
how to cook if you're all the way down there in San Francisco.  Now, fix your
face and come back out.  Luis and Manuel are going to entertain us with some
guitar playing and probably some of their dirty songs."

The
rest of the night is fun.  I enjoy the guitar playing and the songs, even
though they're all in Spanish and I can't understand all the words.  Tony sits
with me on the couch and drapes his arm over the back of it, not touching me,
but I can tell he wants to.  At one point, I see him and Isabel wink at each
other and wonder what that's all about.

The
next afternoon we go back to San Francisco but not until José and Isabel make
me promise that I'll come back again before the summer is over.

CHAPTER
48

August
1974

A week after we get back
from the farm, Tony asks me if I would like to go on a little jaunt with him.

“A jaunt, what kind of a
jaunt?” I ask him.

“A surprise jaunt, just
for the day.   You’ll find out when we get there.”

“Well, what do I wear? 
Is this dress-up or casual?”

“Casual dress-up.  Come
on, show me what you’ve got in your closet, I’ll help you pick.” 

“I don’t think there’s
any such thing as casual dress-up.  Besides, I’m too fat. Nothing in there is
going to fit.  I need to go shopping for some maternity clothes.  I can’t keep
running around in sweats and muu-muus.”

“Let’s go shopping then.”

He takes me to a
maternity store, where I buy several outfits.  He chooses one with light green
linen pants, a lemon colored blouse and adds a straw hat to it for me to wear
on our ‘jaunt’.  “You’ll need comfortable shoes too.  We’re probably going to
be doing some walking. I’ve got it scheduled for day after tomorrow so get
plenty to sleep tomorrow night, a car will pick us up at 8:00 Friday morning.”

“Oh, please Tony, tell me
where we’re going.  I don’t like surprises.”

“I’ll tell you once we
get on our way so you can’t change your mind.”

Friday morning a limo is
here waiting for us.  I recognize it as Fred’s but he’s not in it.  “Where’s
Fred, isn’t he going too?”

“Nope, I borrowed his
limo.  This trip is just for you and me.”

The limo takes us to the
airport where there’s a jet similar to mine waiting for us.   Good, lord, he’s
leased a jet.  This must be costing him a fortune.  We board the jet, and after
we’re airborne, I start badgering him.

“Come on; tell me, its
Reno isn’t it.”  He shakes his head no.  “Vegas, then, its Vegas.”  Another
shake of his head.  “Tell me, tell me, tell me.  I’m going to find out in a little
while anyways.”

“Nope, you’re just going
to have to wait.”

“Well, I know we’re
headed south because that’s the Pacific Ocean on my right side.”

The flight takes about an
hour and I still don’t know where we are when we land.  “Okay, now tell me, where
are we at?”

“We’re not there yet,”
and he leads me over to where a helicopter is waiting.  We get in the chopper
and head out over the Pacific.  Oh, my God, now I think I know where we’re
going, Santa Catalina Island.

“Come on, give me one
little hint.” 

He starts humming The
Four Preps song,
26 Miles,
and then says, “So how does Catalina for the
afternoon sound?” 

I can feel my jaw drop. 
He
was
referring me to that night when he said he had fallen head over
heels for some woman.  He’s taken my dating suggestion on how to woe her and
acted on it.

“It was
me
you
were talking about that night?”

“Yes, Libby, it was you. 
I’ve been crazy about you since that first day we met on the loading dock at
the food bank.  Let’s not talk about it now though, let’s just enjoy this
beautiful day together.”

After we land, a taxi
takes us to a hotel where he’s rented a room for the day so we’ll have some
place comfortable to relax.  Next, he’s booked us on a tour to see the island. 
After that, we have lunch and then take a nature walk on our own.  While we’re
walking, I find a pretty rock.  “Oh, look, look at this,” I say.

“Oh, my goodness, it
looks like a rock,” he teases.

“I know it’s a rock, but
it’s a special rock.  Look at it, look at all the colorizations.  Here, I want
you to have it.”

“A rock, oh, honey, you
shouldn’t have.”

“Just take it, you goof,
and every time you look at it, think of me and this wonderful day.”

“From now on, this rock
will be my lucky charm,” he says and puts it in his pocket.

After our walk, we go
back to the hotel and I confront him about his feelings for me. 

“So, what does all this
mean?  Where are you coming from with all of this?”

“Oh, Libby, I know I’ve
never told you how I feel about you.  I didn’t know how.  Jessie said you didn’t
want anything more to do with men.  So I just tried to be your friend.  Do you
remember the first day we met? I knew right then and there, that you were the
one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.   Most people spend all of their
time looking for that someone special.  The day I met you was the day I stopped
looking.  I love you.  I want to marry you.  I want us to be a family, you, Angie,
and me, and I’ll love this baby you’re carrying as if it was my own.  I know that
you’re probably not in love me, that you still have feelings for Red, but I
promise you, if you marry me, I will do everything I can to make you the
happiest woman on earth. ”

“That’s where you’re
wrong, Tony, I do love you, not in the same way I loved Red, but in a better
way, a more meaningful way.  The feelings I had for Red are gone.   They’re
dead.  I’ve never told you how I feel about you either.  I flipped out for you
too that day at the food bank.    I never thought you’d be interested in
someone like me.  I was coming off a bad relationship and  I didn’t want to get
hurt again.”

He gets down on the floor
on one knee and pulls a jewelers box from his pocket.  When he opens it, I see
the most precious white gold ring with a little diamond that’s about a quarter
of a carat, set in a beveled diamond shaped setting, which makes it look larger
than it really is.  Its dome shape mounting is filigreed down the shoulders and
all the way around the gallery.

“This was my
Grandmother’s.  Mama gave it to me that day she had a talk with me back at the
farm.  I know it’s not much and if you don’t like it I’ll get you anything you
want when we get back to Frisco.  Will you marry me, Libby?  Will you make me
the happiest man alive?”

“Oh, my God, it’s
beautiful, I don’t want anything else.”  Then it hits me, the baby, I'm going
to be able to keep my baby.  I start to cry and whisper under my breath,
"I can keep him, oh my God, I can keep him."

"What's wrong,
sweetheart, why are you crying and keep who?  What are you talking about?"

"The baby, I was
thinking about giving it up for adoption because I didn't think I could raise
it by myself."

"I know.  I saw
those pamphlets you brought home from the doctor's the night of the
earthquake.  Of course, you can keep your baby; there’s no way I would want you
to give it up.  And you won't be raising it alone, I'll be right there with
you.  But, you haven't answered my question yet, will you marry me?"

“Yes, I’ll marry you,
Tony, yes, I’ll marry you.”

“Woo hoo, when?  Don’t
make it too far off.  I’ve waited long enough already.”  He takes the rock I
gave him out of his pocket.  “I told you this was going to be my lucky charm,
didn’t I?”

“Just as soon after the
honeymoon as we can.”

“So, you want the
honeymoon first, huh?”

“Don’t you?  Just to make
sure we’re compatible.”

“I’ll go along with
whatever you want, but honey, I think we should do it the old fashioned way. 
Let’s get married first and then have the honeymoon.”

“Okay, but if you end up
not liking what you get you’re going to be stuck with me.”

“Oh, I think I’ll like
what I get and I can’t wait to be stuck with you, babe.”

EPILOGUE

Three
Years Later

Relaxing in my chaise lounge,
I gaze out over the sparkling blue of the Mediterranean Sea and then turn my
head to watch my wonderful family play on the beach.  We’ve been spending the
summer in beautiful Majorca, Spain.

My husband, Tony, whom I
have come to love more than life itself, is playing fetch with a stray dog that
wandered up.  It’s taken me a long time to learn to trust a man again but with
Tony’s unconditional love and patience, I no longer feel paranoid that I’m
going to be dumped on.  He has given me the most splendacious life and a love
that I could never have dreamed possible. 

Beautiful Angelita, 9
years old, joyous, and full of life, is busy building pyramids in the sand. 
She’s growing up to be such a wonderful human being, so kind and loving, always
thinking of others, before herself.

Then there’s two and a
half years old Michael, my little green-eyed gremlin, with his daddy’s curly
red hair, mischievous grin and jovial personality.  He’s gleefully destroying
one of Angie’s pyramids, jumping up and down on it.  He is Red’s best and last
gift to me.  I wish Red could have known that he had a son, but he didn’t and
he never will.  He passed away eight months ago. After he left Eagle Valley, no
one ever heard from him again until his parents got word that he died from a
car accident in Colorado.  Barb sent me his obituary but it didn’t say what
caused the crash.  It only stated that his car struck a guardrail, crossed the
centerline, and collided head on with another vehicle.  His death hit me hard.
He was my first love and even though I’ve hated what he did to me, I will
always love him.  I wish I could have seen him or talked to him one last time. 
I'd tell him about his son and that I forgive him, but now the only way I can
see him is when I’m asleep.  Once again, he occasionally haunts my dreams.

Tony comes over, kisses
me, and rubs my swollen belly.  In three months, I will give him the thing that
he’s always wanted, children of his own.  I’m pregnant with twins, a boy, and a
girl.  

Later today, we’ll be going
back to San Francisco, cutting our summer vacation short by a month.  My doctor
here wants me on bed rest because I’m having occasional contractions, and Tony
doesn’t want to take the chance of me going into premature labor while we’re
away from home.  He picks me up and carries me in his arms up the pathway that
leads to our vacation rental.  The children and their nanny follow us into the
house.   The housekeeper tells us that the pilot just called, the jet is ready
and waiting to fly us home.   Tony sets me down on the couch and the kids
gather around, patting, and kissing my belly.  I kiss them both and say, “It
hurts a little.”

“What hurts, the babies?”
Tony says in alarm.

“No,” I tell him. 
“Happiness.”