When Our Worlds Collide (13 page)

This was the closest I have been to him. I admire the bronzy
gold hint to his pupils as the light reflects off of them from the morning sun.
Just as I had last night, I reach my hand up and gently trace the outline of
the bruise that now plagues his beautiful face with the unwarranted
imperfection.

I am aware of Graham’s hand that is now resting on my lower
hip right above where my tank top rides up exposing a splinter of skin. His
skin against mine makes my stomach flip over a few times. I can’t take my eyes
off of him in fear that when I do he will come to a realization, a realization
that I was hoping he would never find.

“About last night…” Graham breaks the silence.

“I know what you are going to say,” disappointment hangs in
my voice. I don’t even bother to try to hide it.

“I don’t think you do Kennedy. If you did then you wouldn’t
be looking at me like that.” He closes his eyes trying to concentrate on what
he’s trying to say.

“How am I looking at you?” My hand moves away from the side
of Graham’s face and moves down onto his chest where it lays lifeless.

“Like you’re afraid that I regret any of it…coming here. If
you’d pay attention you’d know that the only thing that I regret is not doing
this last night.” Graham’s hand moves off of my waist and without dropping
contact with my skin makes the journey up to my face intertwining his fingers
into my messy wavy hair.

Before I can protest, before I can even think about it his
perfect lips are mashing into mine eagerly exploring every inch of my mouth
giving me by far the best kiss that I can ever imagine. Graham finds his way
over the top of me nestling between my shaky legs. His tongue skims my bottom
lip asking for permission to enter. I part them in eager response. My heart
began to race and I can feel it beating against my chest as if it needs an
escape. As the kiss deepens I feel our legs mingle together. When our lips
finally separate it’s only for a short second. I’m surprised that his breaths
are as shallow as mine.

The kiss continued feverishly and with that I am comfortably
secure in the arms of a boy whose world is much darker than I imagine is
possible, whose secrets dig far deeper than what I have dreamed up in my own
head, and whose life may not be as perfect as he has led us all to believe.
None of that matters because from last night to this morning everything has
changed.

Chapter Twenty-Two

-Graham-

My initial plan, the simple plan that I swore by, was to
stay away from Kennedy as if she is the carrier of a new bubonic plague. It
seemed like the right thing to do until now. Explaining to her last night that
I’m not this nice guy that she convinced herself I am and that I’m not worth
befriending was awkward. She refuses to admit to the truth no matter what I
say. I know it is only a matter of time till I screw up. I always screw
everything up. Something as easy as this can’t last forever. I have already
managed to disturb her life enough and the last thing I want is to make things
more complicated for her. Everything about me screams complicated.

All that self-loathing aside, I don’t regret what I had done
last night lying in bed with her or the kiss we just shared. It is something
that had to happen. I could see it in her eyes as she brushed her slender
fingers down my face and onto my chest that she needed it just as badly as I
had. Her lips are the nearest thing to perfection. I knew they would be. I
can’t seem to force my eyes away from them when she’s in front of me. The pull and
attraction towards her isn’t something to be easily explained. The affection
just was there…ever present without waver.

As she’s still below me looking up at me with wondrous eyes,
I’m trying not to put my full weight on her. I can’t muscle up an excuse to not
be in this moment with her. It’s new, something to strive for. Something worth
doing, even if it would screw everything else up.

Through ragged breaths she parts her lips from mine.
“Graham…” she whimpers making me stand at half mass.
From just saying my
name? Christ.
I tuck a few strands of hair behind her ear and she shutters
under my touch. To know that I do that to her makes me want her even more. I
push the thought back.

“Kennedy,” I whisper lower than necessary.

“We should probably get ready for school.” We both glanced
over at her alarm clock as it continues to beep in reminder that we need to get
up. We must have been too wrapped up in each other to notice it go off. I
carefully roll over onto my back lying beside her unsure of where we are supposed
to go from here. I stare up at the ceiling trying not to kick myself for what
had just happened.

Kennedy’s nothing like the other girls I have wasted time
with in the past. She’s unsure of herself somehow even with how bright and
beautiful she is. That’s what’s so damn endearing about her. I can’t just turn
my back on her and I don’t understand why I’m allowing myself to be entranced
by her innocence. What is with this girl that has me all worked up?

Most girls got the boot in the morning if they were lucky
enough to make it through the night. As I watch Kennedy sit up in bed
stretching her back I notice every muscle contort with her movement. The
motions are rhythmic. She clearly has the body of a dancer, but luckily still
has that appealing curve that makes your eyes wander a tad bit too long on her
hips and chest.

Kennedy goes into the bathroom shutting the door behind her
without looking back at me as I lay in her bed. After a few minutes the shower
turns on. There’s a hint of a humming coming from the other side of the door
just loud enough to hear through the stream of water. I’m racking my brain
about what that kiss meant when her cellphone starts beeping on her nightstand.
I pick it up. It was an obvious invasion of her privacy and none of my
business. I look at the message screen to see a missed text from Craig.

Son of a bitch.

I don’t read it quickly pushing the button on the side to
black out the screen. I have a good feeling I know what it’s about. I turn the
door knob of the bathroom without knocking. The door swings open to a very wet
Kennedy wrapping a towel around her body just in time. I was seconds too late
from seeing her entire body in all its glory. I swallow hard as she looks
straight ahead staring at herself in the mirror before turning her attention to
me punishingly slow. She knows I’m standing here, but doesn’t shy away like I
assume she will, how she should have.

“Umm…I probably knock next time, huh? That was stupid of me,
but your phone went off and I thought that it might have been important,” I
explain extending my hand for Kennedy to grab the phone from me. She comes up a
few feet short forcing her to step out of the tub to make several short strides
until she’s directly in front of me. Our chests are close enough to each other
that every time she takes a breath in and out it bumps against mine. 

The only thing that stands between Kennedy and I is a
miniscule towel that barely skims the top of her thighs. Anyone would have
expected a girl like her to shy away from standing in front of anyone,
especially someone like me, with dripping wet hair that’s clinging to her damp
skin. The moisture causes a dew to plaster every inch of her pale skin. I have
to fight back the urge to bend down and kiss the pool of water that gathers at
her collarbone.

Instead I cast my hand down her arm picking up the remnants
of her shower on my finger. Standing this close to her I can smell her
body-wash or maybe it’s her shampoo. It infiltrates my senses and forces me to
take slow deep breaths to try to memorize it. It’s sweet and has a hint of
coconut and vanilla, something that I don’t ever want to forget. Not sure if
she has noticed what I’m doing, but she tilts her head up towards me exposing
her neck. It’s an invitation, if I have ever seen one before.

I panic. Go ahead, call me an idiot. I know the opportunity
I just let slip through my fingers. Most guys would have already had her
splayed out on the bathroom rug screaming their name. I was once one of those
guys. In fact, I’m pretty sure I am still one of those guys. If it would have
been anyone else but her I suppose this moment would have happened completely
different.

Frozen in the same spot, I kiss Kennedy on the forehead
breaking the trance we are in. “You better check that,” I nod towards the phone
in reminder. And that’s how I leave Kennedy standing in the bathroom alone with
her cellphone with a waiting text from Craig.

Did I seriously just kiss her on her forehead?
For
fuck sakes, we were practically mauling each other this morning in her bed and
now I downgrade her to a brotherly kiss on the head
. I’m an idiot. I’m the
biggest kind of fucking idiot.

It’s no surprise that Craig had texted Kennedy this morning
to see if she needed a ride to school. She told him no without giving him any
type of explanation. I don’t understand why. She could have easily told him
that I was the one that was picking her up. She chose to keep it a secret, to
keep me a secret. Would I keep her a secret too if the roles were reversed?
Maybe she’s more into Craig than what I originally thought.

The ride to school is driven in silence. Neither of us says
a word to each other. I don’t know what to say. We allow the music to fill the
small space in my car instead. Kennedy makes it easy, making her that much more
intriguing. I don’t think it’s necessary to say anything when she’s around.
There’s a comfort that radiates off her. I’m in more trouble than I think when
it comes to having Kennedy hanging around.

There’s plenty that Kennedy and I can discuss. I practically
rejected her in her bathroom this morning, that’s how she feels about it. I can
tell by the way she looked at me as we ate breakfast. She felt discarded. I
didn’t give her any reason to feel differently. Feeling her eyes on me while
I’m driving isn’t easy. Knowing I had done the right thing by her helped me get
through being in such close proximity. 

My mind flicks to the night before, the way Craig eyeballed
Kennedy and rubbed her leg under the table at the restaurant. Perhaps I’m
thinking too deep into our little “situation” that we both had participated in
willfully. Maybe that moment this morning was just a fluke, a temporary moment
between two people who clearly shouldn’t have let it escalate that far. It’s
pure sexual attraction, that’s all. I’m the man-whore who sleeps with my fair
share of girls and she’s the sweet virgin who happens to have killer legs to
pair up with all that innocence.

I pull into my normal parking spot luckily to find everyone
is already inside the school. Explaining arriving at school together wasn’t
something that Kennedy or I would be able to do. It’s something I’m sure
Kennedy wants to avoid by her lack of an explanation to Craig.

“About this morning, Graham…” her voice trails off as if
she’s in deep thought. As if she struggles trying to piece the words together.
I don’t let her stammer along at what I know is bound to come. I’ll put us both
out of our misery.

“I know what you’re going to say and you’re right. It was a
mistake. Last night made me flustered and vulnerable. I played on those
emotions and ran straight to you. It wasn’t fair,” I lie opening my driver’s
side door before getting out. I bend down to peer in at Kennedy who sits still
in her seat staring towards the school. “And I’m sorry for everything. I
shouldn’t have allowed myself to get so comfortable with you just because you
showed me a tiny hint of empathy.” I admit not knowing if I believed it myself.
I take that back, I know I’m full of shit.

Kennedy steps out of my car pulling her crutches from my
back seat. Peering over the top of the car she looks my face over a couple of
times allowing her eyes to rest on my bruised eye. “It was…a mistake,” she
whispers lightly. I’m not sure if she means for me to hear that, or if she’s
telling herself.

I close my car door making my way into the school knowing
that Kennedy’s lagging behind. I peek back towards her.  I think I see sadness
in her eyes. Without the courage to slow my pace and fall in line with her I
continue with my long strides. Putting distance in between us is the only thing
I know to do if I want to keep my hands to myself. I’m not exactly sure if
that’s even what I want. I know that nothing good can come from Kennedy and me.
We’d end up hating each other. I’d just hurt her more than I already have.

In the end it doesn’t matter anyways. As soon as Kennedy
sees Craig her eyes light up with a smile as he runs over to her placing his
arm around her shoulder to greet her. She doesn’t shy away from him. I guess
that’s my answer. It all was a mistake.

I was the one to utter those words just before coming into
school. I can’t be upset now with the way she laughs along with all of the
things Craig says when I see them standing by his locker. It’s not that they
are trying to throw it in my face. Besides Kennedy, Craig has no idea what
happened this morning. He has no reason to back off. She’s fair game.

Opening my locker and throwing my bag in a little too
roughly causes unwanted attention. Craig glances over at my outburst. “Dude,
what happened to your eye?” he observes the brutal black and purple bruise on
my face.

“Ugh…I…” trying to come up with an excuse isn’t easy. I
almost forgot about my face with everything that had happened this morning with
Kennedy. No one knows what my family is like. I intend on keeping it that way.
Kennedy eyes advert before catching me in her gaze.

“Umm…that’s actually my fault,” she interrupts. Craig and I
both look back at her waiting for her to continue. I can’t wait to hear where
this is going. “Last night after we finished at the pizza place I was helping
Graham with some homework assignments and I accidently elbowed him in the
face.” Craig takes the chance to move his stare between the two of us and
quickly figures he believes the lie that Kennedy has told him.

 Craig swings around putting his hand on Kennedy’s hip
dangerously close to her ass. I shudder at the gesture. “Damn girl. Remind me
not to mess with you,” Craig jokes tucking a strand of loose hair behind her
ear. It was just earlier this morning that I was the one touching her like
that. Kennedy must feel my eyes on her.

Kennedy turns her attention towards me letting her eyes
linger on me long enough for me to know that she is unsure, unsure of
everything.

“I’ll see you guys later,” I half ass a wave in their
direction storming off like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum.

The entire day is spent avoiding Kennedy’s inviting glances.
She sits directly across from me in the cafeteria beside Craig. It bothers me
the way she’s flirting with him. I keep reminding myself that I don’t have any
sort of claim on her. I thought that she had looked at me this morning in a way
that was only reserved for me. I am clearly wrong once again. Amanda comes up
behind me and plants a kiss on my cheek, but I move away from it.

“Damn Graham, what happened to your face?” Amanda grabs my
chin forcing me to look in her direction.

“My girl here clocked him last night,” Craig chimes in a
little too proudly at the way he tries to claim Kennedy publically. Kennedy and
I simultaneously freeze in our seats locking eyes.

“What!” Amanda shrieks looking between the two of us.
Everyone is unaware of the unease between Kennedy and me.

“She accidently elbowed me when we were working on homework.
It’s not a big deal,” I explain trying to keep the original story straight.
Amanda attempts to run her hand across the bruise and I move away from her
touch again before standing up from the table. I need to get away from everyone
and quick.

I’m officially turning into an emotional girl. I need to get
laid or something.
This is getting to be ridiculous.

Reaching my locker, there is footsteps coming up behind me.
Well, not exactly footsteps but the familiar clicking of a pair of crutches. A
sound I am all too familiar with, a sound that is becoming to be music to my
ears.

I don’t turn around, but she speaks up anyways, “Are you
okay?”

“Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?” I offer as I turn
around to see Kennedy’s face full of worry.