Authors: Hayley Oakes
I nodded, silent again. “I was just thinking how much I loved this city and my life.” I sniffed.
“Too bloody right, we are awesome, independent women with glistening careers ahead of us amounting to more than any of our loser families thought we would.”
“Then I think of Robert and I crumble.”
“Look, Grace, sod him, sod this ‘little girl lost’ routine. He walked away from YOU! You were pregnant. You have loved and brought up his daughter. So you were too embarrassed to ask for help? Sod him! See him tonight as the confident woman who loves her city and is a bloody phoenix from the ashes. Don’t be anyone’s bloody victim.”
“Yeah!” I shouted, and then realised where I was and looked around laughing.
“Yeah!” Maria shouted.
***
The afternoon disappeared in a blur of activity. Anna arrived during my break and Lyndsey went home. I went to the bathroom at 5:30 and touched up my make up. I always carried something in my bag, luckily, for emergencies, usually involving walking from the bus in the rain. I applied more foundation, blusher, and mascara and retied my hair into a high bun. I raked my hands through my fringe and headed back out for the last half hour of my shift.
“Shit,” Groucher said as I went to pick up some orders he had shouted. “You going out or something?”
I smirked. “Do I usually look like death or something?”
“No.” He laughed. “But you’re looking good, who’s the lucky man?”
“It’s not like that.” I smiled.
“Well he better treat you right,” he called after me, and I laughed as I made my way out of the two-way door into the restaurant. I walked forward, plates held high when I saw him by the door. He was early. Anna bounded over to him. I saw her from behind as she cocked her head to the side and talked to him, but he continued to look at me. I tore my gaze away and placed the meals at table four.
“Any sauces?” I asked breezily, my voice a lot steadier than I felt.
“No, thanks.”
“Grace!” Anna shouted to me. I glanced back over to meet Robert’s eyes again, and Anna tipped her head towards him, calling me over.
“A friend for you,” she whispered leaning towards me when I approached. “Full of surprises this week.” She grinned.
“Hi,” I said, grinning sheepishly when I saw Robert. He wore the same dark woollen coat over a pinstriped suit with a purple tie. He smiled easily and Anna walked away watching us through narrowed eyes as she made her way to the kitchen. No doubt she was going to spread the word that a man was here to meet me; it was unheard of.
“Hi,” Robert said. “Sorry I’m early, I had a meeting nearby and it finished early. Should I go for a walk and come back?”
“Oh God no, don’t be silly, take a seat at the bar, I’ll get you a drink and see if I can finish early. God knows I’ve stayed late enough times.” He smiled and followed me to the bar. I was conscious that he could watch me from behind, because I was heavier than when he knew me. Not to mention our uniforms consisted of a stretchy, black skirt that stopped mid thigh and a fitted, white collared shirt, leaving our bottoms exposed to ogling. “Take a seat,” I said, patting a red upholstered stool.
“Thanks,” he said.
Five
Eight Years Earlier
School had finished for the summer. I had taken my GCSEs and was fairly confident that I would get into college with the results I was expecting. I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, but I was pretty sure there was more to life than this town and my depressing mother. After bumping into Robert that day, I had walked Jess past his house as usual for the past three weeks, but hadn’t seen him since. The summer heat was becoming more intense, and I was used to lying around in bed most of the morning and then sunbathing in the afternoon with my friends, Rachel and Jane. Then I would head home, walk Jess, and either sit with Mrs Jones for a few hours, or read a book in the garden.
Rachel’s dad lived in Chicago, and so she was going there for six weeks. Jane’s parents were taking her and her brother to Florida for three weeks. I had other friends from school, but none that I could be bothered to spend the summer with. They were all obsessed with boys … kissing boys, chasing boys and parties where they could pull boys. I liked boys, had kissed a few boys at parties, but the incessant chatter hurt my ears. Rachel, Jane, and I had more to talk about, and we had no interest in the childish, boring boys that we knew from school. Instead, we planned holidays, designed our own clothes from old stuff we had at the back of the wardrobe, and smoked cigarettes on my back porch, after Irene was safely in bed.
I decided that if I was going to be alone for half the summer then I had best get a job, and so I trawled town for a place that would take me. I managed to get a job as a waitress at a local café, and it couldn’t have been better. I did four hours in the afternoon and got £15 a day.
It was Friday and I had done two shifts. I walked home in the sun and listened to my latest obsession, Beyonce. I strode into the house and mum was sitting in the dark watching television. She stared blankly ahead when I entered, and so I ran straight upstairs. I changed out of my work clothes and released my hair to fall down my back. I grabbed a pair of denim shorts, a white flowing top, and some flip flops. I ran back downstairs before mum noticed I had even come in and went next door to get Jess.
“No friends today?” Mrs Jones asked, referring to Rachel and Jane, who sometimes accompanied me.
“No,” I said as I shook my head. “They’ve both gone on holiday.” I smiled.
“Never mind,” she said. “You got the weather here, no need to go abroad.”
“True,” I said. “I’ll take her for a nice long walk today, tire her out.”
“Good girl,” she nodded, “Now I’ve made some apple puff pastries today.”
“Great.” I grinned. This woman was determined to make me eat sugar, and I wasn’t sure if I had actually eaten all day, so perhaps it would be all right.
I headed the other way from my usual route out of our long, leafy street. Jess strode ahead sniffing as she went, and I basked in the late afternoon sunshine with a spring in my step from my music. I rounded the corner and headed through the centre of town, passed the local park and walked past my primary school. We reached full circle after an hour and I decided to cut back through the large grassy area that we usually run around on, to get home.
Tonight would be another night of mindless television or reading a good book around the house. Perhaps I’d organise my wardrobe or re-vamp some of Diane’s old stuff. I was just making my way to the entrance of the field from the pavement when I heard my name. It must have been loud if I heard it over my music, and as I turned, Robert stood directly next to me laughing, sitting on his bike. I took my earphones out.
“What have I told you about this field?” he asked and smiled. “It’s dangerous.”
I smiled back and looked across the field. “I can’t see a single psycho, now back off.”
He hopped off his bike and reached down to pat Jess, “Not seen you about.” He shrugged and asked, “You been avoiding these parts?”
“No,” I shook my head. “I’ve been doing my usual route, you just obviously haven’t been looking hard enough.”
“Hmm,” he said, putting one of his hands in his pocket. “I must remember to ramp up watching out the window from 20 hours a day to 24.”
I rolled my eyes and muttered, “Well, I better get Jess back.” I nodded to the field. “You going this way?”
“She got a curfew?”
“What?”
“The dog, why’s she gotta get back?”
“Oh …” I said walking into the field, him behind wheeling his bike. “She’s not my dog; I walk her for my neighbour. She’s an old lady and can’t get out anymore, so I can’t get her back too late.” I patted Jess affectionately as I let her off the lead to run ahead.
“That’s sweet,” he said.
I scrunched my nose and looked at him. “Sweet?”
“Yeah … a nice thing to do.”
“I’m not twelve.” I laughed. “I do it because I want to, not because it’s sweet.”
“Okay.” He held his hands up. “You’re not sweet, you’re a cold-hearted bitch who likes dogs. I get it.” I laughed and he did, too.
We reached the end of the field and Jess was waiting patiently, his house was looming again. “How about this time you let me walk you home? We can drop Jess off and I’ll treat you to an ice cream in town?”
“Oo tempting.” I smiled.
“Well?”
“How about I drop Jess off and meet you in town?”
He looked at me through narrowed eyes. “How about I walk you home, we drop Jess off, and you treat me to an ice cream?”
“Hey, that’s a worse deal.”
“My first offer is always the best.” He grinned, winking at me.
“Fine.” I nodded. “But I get the first deal.”
“Done,” he said, “Come inside a minute, I’ll just tell my mum.” Before I could protest he led us up his driveway and let himself in the front door. I hooked Jess back on to the lead. “Come in,” he said as he motioned. I shook my head.
“I don’t know you … this is weird,” I said. He smiled thinly and disappeared inside. I could see a floral hallway that was decorated tastefully in creams and lilacs and a mahogany telephone table facing the door with a large bunch of fresh flowers in a vase. He re-appeared, closely followed by a plump woman, with dark shoulder length hair and square rimmed glasses.
She smiled at me warmly. “Mum,” he said shoving her back inside.
“Hello, Grace,” she said. “I’m Barbara, Robert’s mum.” She held her hand out to me and he rolled his eyes.
“Jesus, mum. I’m going to town, be back in a bit.”
“No later than ten, Robert,” she said with a smile, “and who’s going to put this bike away?” He groaned and we continued to walk away. I glanced back to see Barbara watching us and going to pick up the discarded bike.
***
We walked down the street, and suddenly I was nervous. We were just going for ice cream, but we barely knew each other. Was this a date? I didn’t know if he would try to hold my hand, or if he might even try to kiss me. I had butterflies in my stomach at the thought. All the boys I had been out with I knew most of my life and went to school with. They had asked me out at school, and we went to the cinema or to a party together. I had never been out with someone that I didn’t know before, that I had to get to know from scratch. Although it was exciting and different, it also scared me to death.
We turned on to my street. It was a lofty and forgotten lane that had a number of large detached houses of all types of architecture, laid out in no particular order. They had sprung up over the past fifty years when families had bought land and just designed their own homes. Our house was large, white, and in serious disrepair. It had been my grandfathers’ and my dad Jeff loved it, but Irene didn’t have the energy or the inclination to keep it up to scratch. It wasn’t money she lacked, as she got lots of that from Jeff’s garage that she still owned.
“Wow, I always thought this street was scary,” Robert said as we headed to Mrs Jones’s house.
“Really?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.
“Why?”
“Well, it just doesn’t look lived in, and there are no street lights, and it just seems dark.”
“It is dark,” I replied and laughed. “Now come on, I need to drop Jess off first, then I just want to put some jeans on.”
“Ah I like the shorts,” he complimented and winked.
“I bet you do,” I laughed.
Mrs Jones’s house was very close to the road. It was a red brick bungalow, and our two houses were the closest in the street. I walked up the front path and Jess ran ahead. Robert stayed by my side unfazed by the strange house.
“Grace,” Mrs Jones said, approaching the front door as I pushed it open. “You’ve been a while; I was worried.”
“I’m fine.” I smiled, standing at the door rather than going inside.
“Are you coming in?” she asked. “I’ve got those pastries.”
“Maybe tomorrow,” I said softly, grateful but anxious to get going. “I’m going to pop into town with a friend.”
“Oh,” she said curiously. She walked to the door and looked behind me to see Robert waiting. “I see.” She smiled. “Well, you two have a lovely time.”
I shook my head and smiled at her. “This is Robert,” I introduced him.
“Ah, the doctor’s son.” She smiled. I looked back to Robert and he nodded, shrugging at me.
“See I’m famous,” he said with a grin.
“Well, hopefully I’ll see you tomorrow, Grace,” she said breezily and with that, we said our goodbyes.
“Your dad’s a doctor, eh?” I asked.
“Yep, he sure is, and the old dears love him. She’s probably seen my picture on his desk. She must be a regular.”
I laughed. “Probably.” We walked next door. “This is my house, my mum has a migraine,” I lied. “So, best just wait out here if you don’t mind.”
“No probs, it’s a nice day. I’ll top up my tan.”
“I won’t be that long,” I sighed.
I ran inside and mum was nowhere to be seen. The house was still and grey in the late afternoon as sunshine filtered into the hall. I rushed upstairs, changed my small shorts for a pair of jeans, threw on a new white shirt, grabbed my handbag, and ran my fingers through my hair. I quickly applied some mascara, blusher, and lip gloss, and rapidly brushed my teeth. Then I ran back downstairs in record time to find Robert sprawled back across our large grey step. I stood over him until he opened his eyes under my shadow.
“Ready?” he asked, springing up.
“Yep.” I nodded. He took my hand and we walked into town. It was then that I realised that this must be a date.