Vulture (14 page)

15 - Not A Human

They didn’t talk on the way back to the cabin. Kaliel threw herself on the grassy mound the moment she crossed the creek and buried her head in the circle of her arms. She took in a mouthful of the familiar scent and tried to calm her nerves. She was a mess even after the hours of walking with pain in her legs and feet. This was worse than one of her nightmares. This was the other side of an ugly reality she created. She heard Krishani sit gingerly beside her but he didn’t say anything. She knew him well enough to know he wouldn’t berate her for her stupid decisions. She regretted going to the waterfall but she couldn’t help it—she had to know. Part of her wished she never existed. She rolled onto her back, suffocated by the recycled air in her lungs. She rubbed her hands along her torso trying to find some comfort. Krishani was on her right with his knees pulled up, forearms resting on them, and his gaze on the creek.

“I ruined everything,” she whispered more to the sky than to Krishani. He looked at her with sympathy. Apparently this wasn’t hard for him and part of her wondered when he suffered the worst of it. He didn’t want to talk about what happened after she died. He seemed happier ignoring it, creating a giant blotch in her memory.

“You didn’t ruin me,” he said.

“Avristar was perfect before we were together,” she mumbled. His input was comforting but it didn’t help with the numbness, guilt, and pounding sound in her ears. The Flame inside threatened to rip her insides apart with its heat and she attempted to quelch it.

Krishani pulled up a long stem of grass and began chewing on it. “Avristar was in peace, but it wasn’t perfect,” he corrected.

She sat even though her limbs felt like they had been flattened by fallen tree trunks and glared at him. “It was better though.” She put her hands to her lips and held them there, not wanting to say what was on her mind. It hurt too much to think she had no real home. Everything she loved about Avristar she would have to leave behind. She thought of the trees. They were her best friends–silent, strong, and sometimes uncomforting–but they were the ones she told her secrets to. She wasn’t sure who she could talk to in the Lands of Men. Who would be her friend there? And did she want them, knowing that as hard as she tried not to bloom the weed, it was impossible to think she hadn’t. Atara didn’t spell it out but Kaliel knew what the Great Oak would say, what the Gatekeeper would say about what she was.

And she desperately wanted to hide that part of herself.

“The Lands of Men aren’t so bad,” Krishani said gently.

She scowled. “Why do you hate Elwen?”

Krishani grimaced. “I don’t hate him. He’s not exactly the ancestor I was expecting.”

“You wanted someone like Istar?”

Krishani shook his head and turned away. “You wouldn’t understand it, Kaliel.” He didn’t say anything else, and she sat there staring at him for a long time, trying to figure out what she could say that would make him open up and tell her all the things she was missing. There had to be something she could still hold onto. Life slipping away like this made her crazy. She sidled up next to him and wrapped her arms around his left arm.

“I don’t know what to do anymore,” she said.

“Just promise you’ll love me, no matter what,” Krishani said, still looking at the creek.

She released him and fell back into the grass. “The last time I loved you no matter what, we burned. Everyone burned.”

“That was a long time ago.” He pushed his back into the grass and glanced at her sideways. She bent her arm up and he followed, twining their fingers together. “Nothing has to end this time.”

She smiled for his benefit even though she felt sick. They stayed like that until it was dawn again, much too soon. Kaliel hated how quickly the days passed. Her eyes traced patterns of leaves against the canopy of the sky and she sighed. “I wish we could stay in Nandaro.”

Krishani gave her a half smile. “One more day,” he said, moving to his feet. He held out a hand and she took it. She didn’t feel comforted by the idea of staying in a place that didn’t want her. “Besides, we can’t leave until nightfall anyway.”

• • •

Someone banged on the door repeatedly. Krishani woke abruptly, with Kaliel sprawled on top of him, her face pressed to his chest. The banging came again and Krishani slipped out of the cot, throwing on his tunic and crossing the floor barefoot. He pressed his ear against the door to see if he could figure out who it was. His thoughts were filled with worry and regret. What if it was Istar? The banging came again, louder this time. Krishani flung the door open prepared to face whoever it was and before he had a chance to say hello, the fully cloaked figure on the other side of the door hauled him out of the cabin by the hair and threw him onto the grass.

Krishani tumbled down the hill, almost bashing his head against a rock as he fell half into the creek. His clothes were soaked as the cloaked figure came at him again and this time Krishani raced to his feet prepared to meet his attacker head on. They locked arms, swaying back and forth dangerously on the hill, trying to gain power over each other. Krishani had to admit his opponent was strong and skilled in the art of combat, but he wasn’t about to let him win. He glanced behind the first attacker and noticed two others. They entered the cabin, and Krishani heard a scream. His heart leapt into his chest at the sound of Kaliel wrestling against them.

Krishani swiftly hooked his leg around the attacker’s leg and they both tumbled to the ground falling over each other as Krishani fought to stay on top. He threw a punch in the attacker’s direction and missed, hitting the grass behind his head. He glanced up and saw Kaliel being pulled outside by the other two, one gripping each of her arms. Krishani went to punch his attacker again but stopped.

“Krishani?” the attacker asked. He huffed like he was out of breath from their little sparring match. Krishani recognized that voice and immediately moved off his opponent. This wasn’t like the Lands of Men. It wasn’t like Osvanir in the cabin by the beach. This wasn’t a fight to the death. Krishani scrambled backwards in the grass, sitting there dumbfounded as Benir removed his hood and looked at him, curious. His blonde hair had grown past his ears, and his blue eyes were as bright as ever.

“What are you doing here?” Benir asked diplomatically as he brushed the grass off his cloak. He went to help Krishani up but the boy refused, moving to his knees first and then to his feet. Krishani wasn’t happy about being wet. This interruption to a completely imperfect day was off putting. He tried to quell the festering emotions wanting to erupt and attempted to hold his face in a smooth, relaxed position. It looked more like a scowl. He glanced at Kaliel who struggled against the others, a distressed expression on her face.

“Let go of her,” he said, commanding.

Benir glanced at them and nodded. They let Kaliel go. She raced down the hill and wrapped her arms around Krishani. He almost fell over at the action but held himself up. Benir crossed his arms and glared at her. “Why are you here? And why did you bring a human with you?” He said the word human like it was a disease that would poison Avristar the way the black skinned creatures had.

Krishani didn’t know what Benir was doing or why he was there. It was so unlike the Brotherhood to go confronting people randomly. “Did Istar send you? Does he know I’m here?”

Benir looked surprised. “No.” The other two flanked him. They didn’t remove their hoods and that bothered Krishani. He clenched his fist and thought about clouds and rain. He knew the land would react to him–he just had to want it badly enough. His eyes trailed to the sky, the appearance of clouds forming in the distance.

“We were guarding the shores when we saw smoke from the cabin,” Benir explained.

Krishani looked bewildered. “Don’t the gargoyles protect the shores?”

“At night they do. We guard the shores during the day,” Benir said.

Krishani didn’t know what to think. He looked at Kaliel only to find her staring at Benir with a baleful look in her forest green eyes. “And she’s not a human,” Krishani said, quiet.

“I don’t care who she is. You need to leave.”

Krishani gulped. It was one thing to come to Avristar unseen and to leave unnoticed but being confronted by Atara and Benir was a shot to his pride. He stood taller and met Benir’s gaze evenly. “We never meant to stay long,” he seethed. He took a step towards Benir and his former brother took a step back.

“Something is different about you,” Benir said as Krishani pulled Kaliel to the cabin. Huge droplets of rain splattered the land, a light gray raincloud passing over their heads.

Krishani turned back to Benir and looked at the sky. “Not much has changed about you. Do they call you a guardian now? What about your dreams to go to Lands of Men?”

Benir pulled his cloak taut around his shoulders as the other two guards threatened to attack Krishani again. Benir held up a hand and smoothed out his features. He pretended not to notice the rain. “I know you’re the Ferryman, Krishani. I know you’re not a Child of Avristar.” There was an accusation in his tone.

Krishani was dead to those words. He snickered as he whispered gently in Kaliel’s ear, telling her to pack their bags. He watched her move into the cabin, a warning look on her face. He wanted to end this stupidity with Benir but it was pointless. The Brotherhood of Amersil wasn’t superior, and Krishani had seen more bloodshed and chaos in the Lands of Men than they would ever see. The idea of Benir protecting the shores of Avristar was laughable. Nothing would touch them again.

“At least I’m not a coward. Tell me, Benir, am I really the biggest threat to Avristar?”

Benir seemed stunned. He fought to keep his composure, and when he couldn’t he threw his hood over his face. “Istar seems to think you’re dangerous. I
know
you are,” Benir said coolly.

Krishani wanted to attack him for throwing his childhood in his face. He didn’t want to talk about what he was; being a Ferryman changed him. Flashes of Rand begging for his life on the beach passed through his mind. Benir didn’t know the half of how dangerous Krishani could be. His eyes turned angry as Kaliel returned with the bags. He pulled the drawstrings taut and slung one over his shoulder. “Are we done here?”

Benir lifted his head. “Not quite. I need to escort you to the shores.”

“Fine.” Krishani took Kaliel’s hand and stalked after Benir and his entourage. They pounded through the forest with the grace of an elephant and reached the hill. Krishani couldn’t even appreciate the sight of the lake in the midafternoon sun. The boat waited for them, and the woman with the pearly white eyes looked directly at them. Krishani moved to the boat without words as Benir and the others stood to the side bowing their heads. Krishani threw the bag into the boat and helped Kaliel without a word. Before he got in Benir clapped a hand on his shoulder. Krishani shot him a vile look.

“I’m sorry, my friend. Farewell,” Benir said, letting go.

“Be well,” Krishani grumbled. It was a customary response and one he couldn’t deny to Benir, who had once been his oldest friend. He climbed in after Kaliel and Benir push them into the water. He didn’t know what to feel anymore. He stood at the bow, staring at the island for a long time. Arms circled his waist as the island grew smaller in the distance.

“We can never call it home again,” Kaliel whispered, her voice wavering. He covered her hands with his and hung his head in response. Nothing was left for them on Avristar, nothing but cruelty and punishment.

* * *