Vengeful Shadows (12 page)

With erratic movements, she clawed his jacket from his shoulders and let it drop. She wanted to feel his skin. To taste it. He jerked the tie from his neck. It fell to the floor, forgotten.

She made quick work of his shirt buttons. Several popped off in the process. Her hands stroked across the muscled planes of his chest in reckless exploration. Goose bumps covered his skin, and his nipples beaded tightly as her fingers brushed over them. Changing course, she stroked his back before dipping her hands beneath the waistband of his pants. He groaned. She tasted his skin as she stripped his shirt from his body and trailed her mouth across his hot, rain-damp skin, taking care to scrape her teeth across his pecs. He ground his erection against her. An answering ache throbbed between her legs as a fresh rush of moisture flooded her pussy.

Control wasn’t something she surrendered willingly. Not anymore. Not since
him
. But Zander made her want to scream, “Do me, now!” Taking that step was as improbable as her mother taking a vow of poverty and joining an order of nuns. Instead, Tessa led him to the couch and pushed him onto the cushions. His eyes widened in surprise when she grabbed hem of her shirt and drew it over her head.

The wind wailed outside, a dull echo of the storm that raged through her. Rain slashed against the windows like pebbles thrown against glass. The noise raised goose bumps on her fevered skin. She moved into his warmth.

Zander dragged his hands up her thighs and lifted her skirt. His rumble of appreciation as he bared her flesh sent desire shivering along her limbs. He grasped her hips and dragged his mouth across her stomach. His tongue circled her navel before it dipped into the slight indentation. She trembled at the contact, her internal muscles clenched as she imagined his mouth moving lower. What she wouldn’t give to have his mouth on her pussy. She slid her fingers into his hair and contemplated urging him in that direction, but before she could decide, he found the closure on her skirt. She pushed his hands away and released the clasp. The fabric dropped wetly to her feet. Freed, she straddled him, nervous excitement coiling in her stomach. He arched against her heat and gripped her waist, angling her closer to his erection. The sensation of his cock rocking against her pussy momentarily halted her ability to think. She’d forgotten what it was like to be this close to a man.

His damp, silky hair caressed her skin as he edged closer. She inhaled on a gasp when his lips fastened onto her nipple through the stiff lace of her bra. The wet heat of his mouth, combined with the rasp of fabric almost sent her over the edge. For a moment, she trembled then rocked against him, trying to regain some semblance of control. His hips jerked at her motion, and his shuddering breath warmed her skin. Vibrations of awareness thrummed through her.

He slid his hands over her shoulders to slip into her wet hair. His lips were hot and demanding, but she met every advance with her own. She moved to free her bra clasp but one of his hands engulfed hers.

Realization surfaced through the haze of passion. He’d backed her against a wall tonight and now held her immobile, but neither had fazed her. She hadn’t panicked. She’d barely noticed. Before she could explore the thought, he seduced it away.

“Let me,” he murmured against her mouth. “I need…” His words drifted off as he buried his face between her breasts.

“You need what?” she prompted.

His eyes opened. Brilliant, deep green but clouded with yearning, they held her motionless.

“You.” The word tore from him on a rusty whisper that twisted her insides. He trailed his fingers up her spine.

She wanted to trust him—more than anything. She could do this. She could let herself be vulnerable with him. She closed her eyes as his fingers found the clasp and released it.

Her eyes flew open as Zander took a deep breath, his gaze on her bared breasts. As if in a trance, he raised his hands to palm her nipples. Lowering his head, he captured one and drew it hard into his mouth. Her body bowed as she arched into him.

She gasped at the hedonistic sensation of skin on skin. To stifle the moan that threatened, she sank her teeth into her lower lip. Her eyes started to flutter closed, but the glance he sent her snapped them open. Hot and ravenous, he devoured her with a look.

Tessa summoned up the miniscule dominion she still held over her body and its responses. He might not have triggered her defenses, but true vulnerability wasn’t an option. She tightened her thighs around him, seeking to salvage her control. Holding his head immobile, she took his mouth with a deep, slow, soul-searing kiss. He groaned, and she tasted her name on his lips. This was how it was supposed to be. She was affecting him, not the other way around.

His hands cupped her waist, and he thrust against her as he lavished open-mouthed kisses on her neck. His whispered words of pleasure caressed her skin, and her arousal heightened. Of their own volition, her hips rocked into his.

Without warning, he captured her nipple, grazing it with his teeth and drawing hard on it. At the same time, he slid his hand across her belly, slipping his thumb inside her panties and skimming it over her neglected clit. That slight touch, nothing more than the mere brush of flesh on flesh, set off a riot of sensations exploding through her body. From a distance, she heard a low keening she recognized as her voice. Release more intense than anything she’d ever experienced mingled with vague dread.

Zander stroked her back, and for a moment, Tessa rested her head against his chest. The warm scent of his skin soothed her until she realized tears dampened cheeks, and she tasted blood in her mouth. She must have bitten her lip.

Disgust and fear slammed through her at the sound of their ragged breathing. This wasn’t supposed to happen. She never lost control. Not like this.

He tried to wrap his arms around her and hold her, and panic pushed forward, clogging her throat. Evidently, her body trusted him enough to let go, but she couldn’t convince her heart and mind. She shoved at his shoulders, desperate for space. He released her, but uncertainty shadowed his eyes.

Scrambling off his lap, she backed away and crossed her arms over her chest. “I’m sorry…”

“Tess?” He rose and walked toward her. “Are you okay?” He reached out to wipe the tears from her cheeks, but she flinched, and he dropped his hand. His eyes clouded with concern.

“Did I hurt you?”

She shook her head, aching at the worry emanating from his eyes. She was such an idiot. She couldn’t even manage casual sex without screwing things up. “I’m sorry. I can’t do this.”

His hand hovered near her face then dropped to his side.

“What’s the matter?” he asked.

Tears of shame and disappointment pricked her eyelids again. “Nothing.”

She could tell from his contemplative manner she’d answered too quickly. He pulled an afghan from the back of the couch and moved to wrap it around her. When she instinctively took a step back, he held it out.

“Are you okay?” he asked again.

“I’m fine.” With a trembling hand, she grabbed the blanket and turned around while she adjusted it over her shoulders. She glanced back but couldn’t quite meet his eyes. “I can’t do this. I need you to…”

“Go,” he supplied.

His expression was inscrutable, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out what he was thinking. He thought she was a freak. Plain and simple. The sad thing was he was right.

“Tess, talk to me. Please.”

She shook her head, willing her tears not to fall. “Just leave, please. I need you to go.”

Silently, he scooped his clothes from the floor. Hand on the doorknob, he turned to look at her, his reluctance to leave obvious. “If you need anything, I’m right next door.”

The door closed, leaving her alone in the darkness. Latching all three locks, she sagged against the door and cried. More than she had in years. She’d thrown away something important tonight, something she hadn’t even realized she’d held. For a short time, she’d thought she might be capable of acting on desire rather than a need for control.

His
face rose in her mind, and for a moment, she could hear his pitiless laugh. Shaking with cold and sadness, she dressed in flannel pajama pants and a sweatshirt, wincing as she drew the fabric over her skin. Her nerve endings were hypersensitive, and the scent of her arousal mocked the moment of bliss she’d found in Zander’s arms.

Tessa double-checked the locks on the doors and windows. When she got to her bedroom window, she froze and her heart dropped into her stomach. A figure stood in the shadows near the house across the street. Was it her stalker?

The temperature in the room plunged twenty degrees in nothing flat. Her sadness turned to fear, and her teeth began to chatter.

She watched the faint, orange glow of a cigarette burn in the darkness. The person dropped it on the sidewalk and walked away. Eventually, the spark faded to black.

* * * *

Tessa had managed to avoid any morning-after awkwardness with Zander by leaving early for work. Sure, it was cowardly, but it was better than the alternative.

When she arrived at the shelter, she found several notes waiting for her. They were all variations on a theme.

I’ve been patient.

I haven’t forgotten what you did.

Payback’s a bitch.

The messages had transformed from unsettling to threatening. She’d bring them to Detective Duritz, but first, she needed to meet with Karen who was already waiting. It looked as if Tessa wasn’t the only one who’d had a bad night. Hopefully, this information would turn up something useful.

By the time Tessa finished her appointment with Karen, Duritz was out on a call, so she left everything with the young desk officer who’d promise he’d give it to the detective as soon as he returned. Frustrated, she drove to the library, constantly checking her rearview mirror. There didn’t seem to be anyone following her. She checked the dashboard clock. Late again. She hoped Emily wouldn’t miss class because of her.

“Nice of you to join us, boss,” Emily sniped as Tessa ducked through the doors. “I’ve been dodging McFeely all morning.”

Tessa sighed as the man approached. “Speak of the devil,” she muttered. “Can I help you with something?” she asked him.

“She,” he pointed at her assistant, “refuses to give me the
New Joy of Sex
.”

Emily snapped her gum. “Damn straight. Can’t give you something we don’t have.”

Tessa stifled a groan at the glare he shot her assistant. “You’re on the waiting list. That’s the best we can do.”

“Will you help me pick out something else?”

She stepped around the desk and headed for the nonfiction section, motioning for him to walk in front of her. This morning, she sensed something different, something coiled and tense. Anger.

“I don’t appreciate you setting the cops on me,” he hissed as soon as they’d rounded the bookcase.

“Pardon?”

“A detective stopped by my office yesterday, asking a lot of questions about you.” He moved closer, menacing.

Was McFeely her stalker? She wouldn’t have thought it possible. She’d only given his name to Duritz because he’d pushed for more people to investigate. McFeely’s intensity made her question that assumption. She took an involuntary step back then stopped and stood her ground.

“What did you tell him about me?” he demanded.

“If you’d keep your hands to yourself, you wouldn’t have had to worry about talking to the police.” She straightened her spine, refusing to let him intimidate her. “I should have said this a long time ago, but I’m saying it now. Touch me or any of my staff again, and you’ll be banned from this establishment and brought up on sexual misconduct charges.”

His eyes narrowed, and he inclined his head at her before turning on his heel. She watched as he stormed past the front desk and out the door.

“Nice work, boss.” Emily draped her arm around Tessa’s neck. “I’m impressed.”

“Thanks.” She should be proud of herself for telling him off. Instead, she just felt drained.

“Oh, I almost forgot. Some guy has been calling for you.”

A chill washed over Tessa’s skin. “Did he leave a message?” she asked, hoping her voice didn’t tremble.

“Oh yeah. Only about a hundred of them. He seemed pretty desperate to get a hold of you.”

Her stomach tightened.

“He said his name is Zander.”

Tessa felt as though her body was a rubber band that had just snapped. It was a wonder she didn’t sag to the floor. She sighed. Of course, he would have tried the library. She’d already ignored all the texts and calls he’d left on her cell.

She could just imagine how that conversation would go.
Hi, Zander. So sorry I’m a psycho.

“The messages are on your desk,” Emily said, breaking into her musings. “I’m going to class now. See you tomorrow.”

“Okay. Bye, Em.”

Her assistant waved and grinned as she grabbed her backpack from behind the desk and headed out the front door.

Tessa checked the clock. Five hours until she could lock up and leave for the night. After reading Zander’s messages, she wasn’t sure she wanted to go home right away. He wanted to talk. Too bad. She wanted to avoid. Maybe, she’d invite Cat and Annie to dinner tonight.

* * * *

Tessa scanned the restaurant, looking for her friends. She’d gotten there forty minutes later than she’d planned on. When she’d left the library, she found yet another envelope on her car. The message had made her blood run cold.

I’ll content myself with the rest until I’m ready for you.

The rest of what? Or more precisely who? How many people would suffer because of her?

She’d gone to see Detective Duritz immediately. He’d tried not to let it show, but he’d been frustrated by her inability to think of other suspects. No more frustrated than she was. So far, he hadn’t turned up any promising leads from the names she’d given him earlier. He’d scrawled his cell phone number on the back of his business card and given it to her. Next to it, he’d written day or night. It wasn’t a comfort.