Unconditional (8 page)

‘Er, sorry?’ I ask, feeling stupid. I’m so scatter brained lately.

‘I said Joe really likes you. I haven’t seen him this happy since he was released.’

I get a warm, fuzzy glow at her words, but I’m surprised she mentioned his time in jail. It gives me an opening to ask a few questions of my own.

‘Was he there long?’

She tilts her head and looks at me as if she’s sizing me up, then gives a little nod as if she’s decided something. I feel oddly like I’ve passed some kind of test.

‘Only a few months; he got out on good behaviour. If you ask me, he shouldn’t have been there in the first place. But he took it quite hard; feels like he’s let everyone down.’

I nod, thinking of the guarded way he gets when I ask him questions about it.

‘So you’re his mum’s sister?’

Steph chuckles, which makes her cheeks and chin wobble. She’s plump, but in that healthy looking way that suits some people, like you just couldn’t imagine them skinny; it wouldn’t look right.

‘I’m her aunt, actually, Joe’s great-aunt, but sweet of you to assume otherwise. Joe was very close to Gayle – his mother – and it did sent him off the rails a little, poor lamb.’

I can’t help smiling at her calling Joe a ‘poor lamb’. It doesn’t quite fit his cool guy image. If Dean or Dannii were here they’d tease him about it for days.

I want to ask her more about his background when I hear him behind me and turn round on the stool quickly, as if I’ve been caught out.

He’s naked. Well, okay, maybe not quite but he may as well be judging by the blush that starts with my face and
warms me all the way down to my chest. He’s wearing nothing but a white towel round his waist, and only one thought comes to my head.
Wow
. Still damp from the shower, his hair wet and slicked back so that it looks darker, making his eyes look even more intense than usual, and
oh my God that body…Every
inch of him is tanned and toned to perfection, and he’s got the body of a man, not a boy. I swallow, my mouth too dry to speak. Joe winks at me as if he knows exactly what I’m thinking.

‘Put some clothes on,’ Steph says. ‘You’re not taking the poor girl upstairs like that.’

Joe grins.

‘I’ve got shorts on. You coming up, Ash?’ He holds his hand out to me and I take it, a tingle going up my arm as we touch. I slide off the stool and follow him upstairs, my hand still in his.

‘No funny business!’ Steph calls up after us and Joe chuckles low in his throat. Although I know she’s downstairs and he’s not likely to try anything, it feels deliciously – yet nerve-rackingly – wicked to be going into the bedroom of a half-naked boy, being led by the hand. I feel like a blushing virgin from one of my novels. Let’s face it, I am a blushing virgin.

A sudden thought occurs to me; does Joe know? He should do, after all I told him I’d never had a proper boyfriend, but that doesn’t always matter. I know plenty of girls my age who lost their virginity at parties or in the local park to guys they barely know. Dannii’s one of them. Rianne too; although thankfully for the baby, they actually fell in love and stayed together. The thought of just doing that with anyone makes me feel a bit queasy, and I’m hoping Joe has realised that about me and isn’t expecting any level of experience from me. Then I remember my hand reaching for his crotch in the car. What if he thinks I carry
on like that with every boy who tries to kiss me? Not that there’s been that many, of course.

As we reach his room he must sense my hesitation because he stops and turns to me, looking concerned.

‘Don’t think I’m bringing you up here to get into your underwear or anything. I just thought we could chill.’

I nod, squeezing his hand, and he leads me into his room.

It’s a typical boy’s room; posters of cars and girls, a stack of car magazines – I can’t help wondering if he’s hiding a porn stash in them – and a pile of CDs and DVDs next to a small TV and stereo. No fancy plasma or array of the latest gadgets, but there is a small weight bench with a pair of dumb bells on the floor. There’s a picture of a woman on the wall; pretty, with the same colour hair and eyes as Joe. His mum.

The only other thing that strikes me as different is how clean his room is, almost military. The bed is made without a crease and the pile of magazines are in a perfect stack, not all thrown on top of each other like my books. I wonder if it’s a jail thing, or if he’s always been like this.

‘Want some music on?’ he asks, and I nod, flicking through his CDs and choosing a band I like that aren’t too cheesy. He puts it on, then unwraps the towel to reveal he is indeed wearing shorts, if you can call them that. White and tight, he looks like a catalogue model, and as he turns to pull on a pair of jeans I can’t help staring at his butt. To my disappointment he pulls the jeans on quickly and then a t-shirt too, spoiling my view.

He flops down on the bed next to me and reaches for a lock of my hair, twirling it between his fingers.

‘It’s a beautiful colour.’

‘What, ginger?’ I scoff. I’ve always been a bit self-conscious about my hair. It’s not ginger, not exactly, but
there’s enough red in it that I was teased mercilessly in junior school until Dannii stepped in on my behalf.

‘It’s more of an auburn,’ Joe says, still playing with it. ‘It’s pretty.’

No one’s ever called my hair pretty before, least of all the hottest boy I’ve ever seen. I smile down at him, feeling the urge to lean down and kiss that lush mouth, still pink and damp from his shower. He pulls me down so I’m practically on top of him and kisses the tip of my nose, then stares intently at me until I fidget and look away.

‘I really like you, Ash. Honestly, I’ve never met a girl like you before.’

I shift uncomfortably. ‘I’m nothing special,’ I protest, and even as I say it I think how true it is, how I can’t fathom what he sees in me. Joe shakes his head at me, looking cross.

‘Don’t say that. You’re so pretty, so clever. You’re way out of my league.’

I cough and almost choke, I’m so surprised at his words. Me, out of his league? He really has been locked up too long. He might just be saying it so he can get his way of course, like most boys, but looking at him I feel instinctively that he means it.

‘I really like you too,’ I say shyly. What an understatement. ‘Like’ doesn’t even come close to describing the way I feel about him. ‘Lust’ definitely. ‘Obsession’ possibly. ‘Love’? it’s too soon for that surely, but I can’t deny the fluttery, excited feeling I get when I think about him or know I’m going to see him, or the crazy jealousy I felt earlier in the library. For a minute I wonder if I should mention what Dannii had said about their conversation on Facebook, then I hear my phone ringing. Right on cue, it’s Dannii.

‘Damn, I forgot, I told her we might meet up with them,’
I tell Joe as I put the phone to my ear. He rolls his eyes as if he can’t think of anything worse.

‘Where are you?’ Dannii asks. She sounds excited, and there are voices and music in the background.

‘I’m at Joe’s,’ I say a touch smugly, expecting her to squeal with interest and ask a dozen questions, but she just pauses and then carries on as if I hadn’t even spoken.

‘Michael’s got some friends round, we’re having a bit of a party; you have to come.’

‘I’ve got classes tomorrow.’

‘Oh, stop being such a bore. You don’t have to stay long. Bring Joe; Dean’s here and some other guys he knows, I think.’

I sigh and look at Joe, who’s sitting close enough to hear. He shrugs.

‘If you want.’

I cover the mouthpiece with my hand.

‘I did tell her we’d go round or something. Maybe we could just go for an hour?’

I tell Dannii I’ll see her soon and ring off. I look at Joe, wondering if he’s pissed off but he’s smiling at me and pulling me gently towards him.

‘We’ll go in five minutes,’ he whispers as his arms go round me. His mouth closes on mine, and I’m lost.

Twenty minutes of frenzied snogging later that leaves me hot and flustered, waking up parts of my body I don’t want to talk about, and we’re on our way to Dannii’s. His arm is slung casually around me as if it belongs there. I like that feeling more than I want to admit to. I feel proud to be on his arm, and not just proud in an ‘I’m so cool look at my hot boyfriend way’. Proud like I want to be his.

Michael flings open the door and looks me up and down with a leer, letting out a low whistle.

‘Well, look who’s all grown up,’ he drawls, running his eyes over my hips and boobs. Joe steps slightly in front of me and holds his hand out to Michael, who slaps it in that boy way that passes for a handshake.

‘I’m Joe, Ashley’s boyfriend.’ There’s no mistaking the unspoken warning tone to his voice. Michael’s mouth makes a little ‘oh’ of surprise, and he steps aside to let us in, keeping his eyes firmly away from my boobs. I’m grinning to myself, mostly because he described himself as my ‘boyfriend’.

There’s already a group of people in the kitchen, mostly boys I don’t recognise, and bottles of beer lined up on the side. Their parents must be out of town. Again. I’ve asked Dannii before if they know or care what she gets up to when they’re not here, and she just shrugged. ‘Not as long as the house is clean.’ Sometimes I feel sorry for her. Mum might not have the money to buy me every new dress and gadget I want, but at least she’s interested. Even my dad tries his best, I suppose. Still, I don’t want to think about them and what they may or may not be doing might now.

‘Babe!’

Dannii sashays up to me, grabbing me in a perfumed hug and kissing me on the cheek with sticky glossed lips. She looks great as usual in hot pants and a long tee and I wish I’d gone home to get changed before coming. I glance at Joe over her shoulder and see him looking at her legs. My enthusiasm dampened I wriggle out of Dannii’s embrace and grab myself a beer, popping the top with my teeth and taking a long swig. It tastes foul.

‘Looks like you’re making a bad girl out of her,’ Dannii quips to Joe, who looks at me intently. I take another swig.

‘You not having one?’ I say, flipping my hair in a Danniilike manner. Joe reaches for a beer, frowning at me.

‘You okay?’

‘Sure. Let’s go dance.’

I wander into the front room, taking another swig of beer and telling myself to get a grip. Being around Joe opens up such a tangled box of emotions I can’t seem to sort through them all. I go over to Dean by the iPod docker, who is clearly acting as DJ, and start swaying to the music. I can’t really dance, but all Dannii ever does is this hip swaying thing and it seems to work for her.

‘Nice ass,’ I hear behind me and I turn round, half expecting Jake but coming face to face with a boy I immediately recognise. It’s Jason, the ringleader from the park. He looks surprised as he recognises me, then smirks.

‘We meet again.’

‘Hi,’ I say cockily, feeling braver in a room full of people with Dean to one side and Joe in the other room talking to Dannii. Why is he still talking to Dannii? I crane my neck over Jason’s shoulder to see into the kitchen but there’s no sign of either of them, only Michael talking to a girl with pink hair. He catches my eye and winks at me. ‘Where’s Dannii?’ I mouth but he’s already turned away to carry on his conversation. I turn back to Jason, who’s still looking at me, and there’s something predatory in his gaze that makes me step back, closer to Dean.

‘Hey, man,’ he says to Jason casually. Somehow it doesn’t surprise me that Dean knows him. Dean is the kind of middle class wannabe thug that would find idiots like Jason cool. I bet he wouldn’t be so friendly if he had heard the comments Jason and Adam were making about Dannii in the park. I look at Dean making ‘help me!’ eyes, but as usual he’s oblivious to anything that’s going on. Not for the first time I wonder what the hell Dannii is doing with him.

‘Feeling a bit friendlier today?’ Jason smirks at me, ignoring Dean. I swallow, all my cockiness gone. Out of all the guys I know, it should be Jason that’s been to prison,
because there’s an air of barely repressed nastiness about him that probably makes old ladies cross the street to avoid him. Hell, after that incident at the park, I’d cross the street to avoid him.

‘I’m fine,’ I try to say in a snotty voice but it comes out as more of a frightened squeak. Jason steps forward and I visibly flinch, but he’s only leaning into Dean to talk about tunes. Seeing my cue to escape I decide to go and talk to Michael, then I see Joe coming towards us. Danni isn’t far behind him, her face slightly red.

‘What’s this idiot doing here?’ Joe stands next to me, glowering at Jason, who glowers back but looks a lot less sure of himself. He shoots a look over his shoulder at two equally sulky looking boys slouching near the sofa who immediately stand to attention, no doubt poised in case he needs back up. Trust Dannii to let just anyone into her house.

‘I invited him,’ Dannii says looking puzzled. ‘What’s the problem?’

‘He tried to grope Ashley in the park. Get him out of here. Before I do.’ Joe speaks quietly, but through gritted teeth, never taking his eyes off Jason, who squares up to him as if he’s about to hit him. Joe doesn’t move. The two cronies near the sofa sidle a bit closer.

Dannii looks at Joe, at Dean, who looks confused, and then turns towards the kitchen and waves urgently at Michael, who walks over with a frown on his face, just as Jason’s two friends come right up behind him, making a perfect trio of teen boot camp candidates.

‘They’re causing trouble,’ Dannii says firmly, and Michael nods. He might be laid back and a bit of a joker, but he’s also a few years older than us and well-built. Standing next to Joe, they look more than a match for Jason and his little crew.

‘Out,’ Michael says firmly. Jason nods at his friends to indicate it’s time to leave, but not before shooting Joe a threatening look.

‘Later,’ he says. Joe raises an eyebrow. They’re doing that secret macho code, where few words are spoken but they each know what the other means. Of course if they were girls there would probably be a screaming match followed by an emotional make friends in the toilets. This though, feels serious and as I watch Jason beating a hasty retreat I feel worried for Joe. I snuggle into him, feeling cold and he kisses the top of my head tenderly. Dannii looks at me with a funny expression on her face.