Twisted Rose: Motorcycle Dark Romance 3 (The Darkness Trilogy) (10 page)

“You mean like a hotel?”

“Yeah,” Josh said.

“Sure, there’s a hotel. It’s nothing fancy, though. Just go down the street there.”

XXI

T
HE MOTEL ALONG THE MAIN
street was called Motel Classi. Rose smiled at the name. There was a small stone building with the office and then a wooden structure across the lot for the rooms.

“We better hide our bikes,” Josh said as they pulled into the lot. There was space behind the stone building where a dumpster was kept and they put their bikes back there.

“If anyone comes into town,” Rose said, “this is the first place they’ll come looking for us.”

Josh looked around. The town was tiny. It was clearly the only place to stay.

“I know it,” he said, “but what are our choices? I don’t want to keep you out on the road all night.”

Rose was touched. She knew that if she wasn’t there, Josh would have kept riding. It was because of her that he wanted to check in to somewhere comfortable.

“We’ll just get up really early,” she said. “If we’re back on the road at dawn we should be alright, right?”

Josh smiled. He reached out and touched her on the arm. It felt to Rose as if it was the first time he’d actually touched her since her crazy incident in the bedroom.

“Let’s go see if they have any rooms for us,” he said.

Rose followed Josh into the small office. Inside was a desk and a couple of chairs. An old woman wearing a pair of bone-rimmed reading glasses was sitting behind the desk. There was a TV on in the corner and the lady was watching the same soap operas that Murdoch had watched back at the Cat. Seeing them on the TV made Rose think back to that terrible place. She vowed to herself that she would never go back there. If the DRMC caught up with her and Josh, if they captured her, she wouldn’t let them take her back there. She wouldn’t let herself go back to being anyone’s slave and whore. She would kill herself before letting them take her there.

“Evening,” the old lady said.

“Evening,” Josh said. “Do you have any rooms?”

The old lady looked over at Rose before answering. She seemed to be assessing her, measuring her up, as if for a fight.

“Is she your wife?” the old lady said.

Josh paused. He hadn’t been expecting a question like that.

“I know how it is these days,” the old lady continued. “In my day it was different. Girls didn’t sleep with boys until they were properly married.”

“She’s my wife,” Josh said.

Rose was surprised at herself. She was actually blushing. She was being silly. Josh had only said that to please the old lady but she couldn’t help it. Hearing him say those words had an effect on her.

He looked at her and she looked away. She didn’t want him to see that she was embarrassed.

“How much for the room?” Josh said.

The old lady was staring at Rose in a way that made Rose uncomfortable.

“You think I was born just yesterday?” the old lady said. “I know she’s not your wife.”

Josh took Rose by the hand and looked the woman in the eye.

“I love this woman and I always will,” he said. “If that’s not enough to get us a room in this hotel then we’ll go someplace else.”

The old lady looked at him and then again at Rose.

“You love her?” she said quietly.

“I do,” Josh said.

She sighed. “Alright,” she said, “but just remember this is a respectable establishment. The room is forty bucks. How you paying?”

“Cash.”

The old lady nodded and got them a key. She made them out a receipt.

“Towels are in the room. Check out is noon.”

“Thank you,” Josh said and led Rose out of the office.

*

O
NCE THEY WERE INSIDE THE
room it felt to Rose like she was finally safe. She could breathe freely again. The room was small but comfortable. It was warm which was the most important thing. She opened the zip on her racing suit and then collapsed onto the bed. It was the only bed in the room.

Josh sat down next to her and started pulling off his boots. He was as exhausted as she was. She could tell.

“Thank you,” she said, “for everything you did.”

“I only did what needed to be done,” he said.

He seemed a little softer now. He’d lost some of the stony fierceness that she’d seen on his face earlier in the day.

“Well, I really appreciate you risking yourself for me,” she said.

Josh looked at her. “I just figured it would be easier for you to move forward with your life if you knew that the men who’d hurt you had met with justice.”

“I think it will help me,” she said.

“It didn’t bring me any pleasure to do it,” Josh said.

“I know,” Rose said. “I’m sorry it had to be this way. I’ve brought you nothing but trouble.”

“You’re not trouble.”

“Yes I am. First you have to rescue me from the Cat. Now you’ve got the blood of seven men on your hands.”

Josh looked down at his hands as if he might actually see the blood on them. He looked almost frightened at the thought of it.

“Six,” he said.

“Six what?”

“Six men. I’ve got the blood of six men on my hands. I let that kid go.”

“Oh,” Rose said.

She tried not to give anything away with her voice but it was too late. Josh had noticed.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“You know that kid?”

Rose said nothing. She stared at the floor. She didn’t want to bring that up. She didn’t want to have to explain to Josh how she knew Patrice or what had happened between them.

“Do you?” Josh said.

Rose looked up at him and then down at the floor again.

“His name is Patrice,” she said.

“You do know him.”

“He raped me, same as the others.”

Josh was shaking his head. “And I let the little twerp go.”

“It’s alright,” Rose said. “He was just a soldier obeying orders.”

“I should have killed him,” Josh said. “I’m such an idiot.”

“You’re not an idiot. He’s young. You had mercy on him.”

“There was just something about him,” Josh said. “I couldn’t bring myself to end his life. I trusted my instincts. I shouldn’t have. When it comes to the DRMC, the only thing to do is kill the sons of bitches.”

“It’s okay, really,” Rose said. “He’s a kid. He might still turn out good.”

“Do you think he will?” Josh said.

“It’s hard to say.”

“The funny thing,” Josh went on, “is that I asked him. I asked him what kind of a man he was.”

“What did he tell you?” Rose said.

She didn’t want to continue the conversation about Patrice but she was eager to know what he’d said. She’d spent countless hours thinking about him during her two years as a captive. Her memory of him was extremely painful, almost too painful to think about, but she couldn’t help it. Something about the way Serge and Fat Boy had forced him to rape her while she was covered in the disgusting stench of her own piss. That wasn’t the sort of memory that it was easy to let go of, no matter how badly she wanted to.

“He said he didn’t know,” Josh said.

Rose nodded.

“I’m sorry,” Josh said. “I should have killed him. The whole point of going there was to give you some closure. I wanted to make it so that you didn’t have to think about those creeps ever again. I wanted to erase what they’d done to you.”

“I know,” she said soothingly.

“I wanted to undo what they’d done.”

“I know,” she said.

Josh looked around the room frantically. He was agitated. She’d never seen him that way before. He was always so calm and collected.

“I wanted to make it so that none of it had ever happened. I know that doesn’t make any sense. I know that’s impossible, but that’s what I was trying to do for you, Rose. That’s what I was trying to do.”

“I know it was, Josh,” she said, as soothingly as she could.

She was sitting next to him, rubbing his back. She tried to imagine how it would make him feel to kill six people but she couldn’t.

“It’s all my fault,” he said.

“What do you mean?”

“What happened to you, Rose. All of it. It’s my fault. If I’d done what I was supposed to do, none of it would ever have happened to you. If I’d been more of a man, you’d never have had to go through any of that.”

“What are you talking about, Josh? How does any of it have anything to do with you?”

“Rex Savage,” he said, “the man that turned you over to Serge. He’s the same man that killed my father. He’s the same man that double crossed your father and the rest of the Sioux Rangers ten years ago. I was supposed to kill him ten years ago when I rode out from my father’s MC. I was supposed to kill him and I never did it. I never did my duty. I was too much of a coward to do what was required and everything that followed is my fault.”

“Josh, stop it. That’s nonsense. None of it’s your fault. You did what you could to avenge your father. You did what you could to preserve the memory of my father too. The things that Rex Savage did are not your fault.”

“If I’d killed him when I first set out, all those years ago, none of this would have happened.”

“Josh, that’s not how it works. That’s not how life works. No matter what you do, something always happens. You can’t avoid it. You can’t avoid the bad things any more than you can the good things. All you can do is respond to them as best you can.”

“I don’t know, Rose.”

“You tried to avenge your father when he was killed. That means something, Josh. When you found out that the DRMC had taken me captive, you did something about that too.
That
means something. When you found out just how badly those men had harmed me, when you saw how distraught I was at the memory of the things they did to me, you did something about
that
too. You rode into Val-d’Or and you killed six of them. All of that means something.”

Josh was still shaking his head. Rose put her arms around him and held him close.

“Shh,” she said in his ear as if soothing a child. “You let go of it all. You did what you could. It’s more than most men would ever do. You can’t control destiny but you can control your own actions, Josh. And you’ve done that.”

“And what about the kid, Patrice. Should I have done something about him too? Why did I let him go. He raped you and I let him go.”

“You didn’t know he raped me.”

“I could have guessed.”

“You followed your instincts, Josh. You followed your heart.”

“I shouldn’t have. It’s just, there was something about him. Something about him that just made me feel pity for him. What was that?”

“I don’t know,” Rose said, and she genuinely didn’t, “but if you think it will help any, I can tell you what happened the night he raped me. I can tell you the way it went down. Maybe that will help you understand.”

XXII

T
HEY WERE SITTING NEXT TO
each other on the bed. Rose noticed the thin cotton of the sheets, the faded curtains, the stained paint on the walls. The place was poor and it showed but to her it was a palace. Compared to the places she’d been forced to live for the last couple of years it was like heaven. She would have happily stayed there for the rest of her life with Josh.

Josh looked at her. She felt self-conscious under his gaze. There was something about him that was different from any other man she’d ever met. He seemed harder, grittier. It was as if he came from a different world, a place where things were harder and meaner. He seemed ready for anything.

“I’m not sure I want to hear this story,” he said.

“I don’t have to tell it,” she said.

And she knew she shouldn’t. It was a bad idea to tell Josh too many of the details of the things that had happened to her before he’d rescued her. It might make him see her differently. He might look at her as a victim, as weak, or worse, he might look at her as dirty, tainted. But there was another reason too. He might want to punish every man who’d ever hurt her, and that could get him killed.

“You said earlier that he was a soldier, obeying orders.”

“Yes,” she said.

“But they didn’t order him to rape you, did they?”

Rose looked at Josh and knew she was crossing a line. She was going to tell him things that would have consequences, things that it would be better never to speak of. But for some reason she felt compelled to speak.

“They did actually,” she said. “Serge and Fat Boy made him rape me as a final show of his loyalty to the club.”

Josh looked thoughtful for a few seconds. “Why would that show loyalty?”

“Because he didn’t want to do it.”

Josh was quiet again. Rose looked at him as he sat there, lost in his thoughts.

“What are you thinking?” she said quietly.

“He was sweet on you, wasn’t he?”

She nodded.

“He was nice to you?”

“He was. At least for a time he was.”

Josh shook his head. “That’s why I spared him. I could tell he was kind, at least deep down.”

“I knew he didn’t want to rape me. He didn’t even want to look at me. Fat Boy and Serge had left me in a terrible state. I was tied to a bed.”

She thought about telling Josh that they’d made her piss herself but the words just wouldn’t come. She wasn’t able to say it. It had been the most humiliating, brutal thing that had ever happened to her and she simply wasn’t able to voice it out loud.

“So Serge and Fat Boy figured out he was sweet on you and they made him rape you?”

“That’s what happened.”

Josh was still shaking his head.

“That’s the way they did things. I don’t understand it. It’s almost as if they sought out beautiful things in the world just so they could destroy them. That’s the reason they had you in the first place, so that they could disrespect the memory of your father. Why would they want to do that? I just don’t understand it.”

“And the way they wanted the strippers in their clubs to be there against their will.”

“That’s sick too,” Josh said. “I’ve been to strip clubs in the city and the girls there are dancing because they want to. They’re doing it because they love it, or they need the money, but either way they’re there by choice.”