Treasure Yourself (10 page)

ourselves with others. A rose is beautiful in its own way as a daisy and a sunflower. They are unique. It’s

not until we fully understand, embrace and accept our individuality that we will truly shine.

My tips for dealing with jealousy:

– Identify what is making you jealous and why.

– Sit with it and accept it.

– Instead of focusing on the negative feeling jealousy can produce, look at it as an act of motivation.

By doing this you will be less likely to concentrate on the things you don’t have and develop the

drive to obtain the things you want.

– Take time to appreciate what you have.

– Get it out of your system. Write down how you feel, or talk to someone about it. This is better than

letting these feelings bottle up where they can do more damage.

– Stop comparing yourself with others. Always keep in mind that everybody is different and unique

in their own way. Make a conscious effort to think about your own good qualities and your own

uniqueness.

– Be accepting of yourself.

Getting Personal:

– Who are you jealous of?

– What is underneath your feelings of jealousy?

– How can you transform these negative feelings into positive action for yourself?

relationships are your strengths…

Relationships in your life can vary from smooth and easy to temperamental and challenging. They don’t

just begin and jump straight to ‘happily ever after’. Relationships take time, acceptance and effort to grow

into something beautiful. I have found that the best relationships are founded on trust, honesty and

communication. If one of these elements is lacking, relationships crumble. I strongly believe that the

beliefs and values you hold about yourself and your life are reflected in all your relationships. Your

relationships with others can tell you a lot about yourself.

Sometimes when I’m facing challenges in a relationship I wonder if I would be better off being on my

own to find peace. Then I realise it is precisely those challenging relationships that help me become a

better version of myself.

Relationships force us to look at our least desirable qualities or traits so we can recognise them. Just as

rocks bumping into each other in a stream eventually polish each other smooth, life polishes us through the

challenges of our relationships.

This does not mean we should stay in relationships that we’ve outgrown. Sometimes the highest way to

honour ourselves is to walk away when the relationship no longer meets our needs. One of the hardest

things I’ve had to do in my career was change agents. This was a difficult decision to make, as my agent

was someone I was personally fond of. In the end I needed to let it go because it wasn’t satisfying my

business needs.

Respect yourself… If you don’t respect yourself, how can you expect others to? If you are continually

beating yourself up about every mistake you’ve ever made, the people around you will focus on the same

and criticise you as well. Once you begin to value yourself, others will start to value you too. The truth is;

if you treasure yourself, everyone else around you will recognise your worth. The people in your life will

only treat you as well as you treat yourself. This applies to any type of relationship you have with other

people, and is sometimes especially obvious with a romantic one.

My advice when it comes to dating is to be true to yourself and know what you want. If a date doesn’t

call you back, realise that it’s obviously not meant to be and let it go. After a bad dating experience, be in

control of the things you are thinking about and you’ll realise that your thoughts are creating your reality

and the way you feel. You can either start picking apart the relationship and everything that went wrong,

or you can learn from what happened and be a better person for it.

Mending a broken heart… In my experience, when a relationship ends, I try to take it day by day. Some

days I’d rather be alone, while at other times I am in the mood to go out dancing or hang out with my

friends. It’s okay to get upset and go with your emotions instead of fighting them, while keeping in mind

that you can get through this. It’s like going through any other personal journey, there are always going to

be ups and downs along the way. It’s important to remember that you’re a unique person with plenty of

gifts to offer the world. Don’t forget all the other relationships you have – with your friends and family.

Because I’m so busy there are times when I don’t even get the chance to really sit and think about what

is happening in my personal life. Sometimes this can be a blessing in disguise, for a while at least.

However, ultimately you can never escape the healing process no matter how busy you are. Break ups are

never easy but they have given me some of my best life lessons. Once I have a chance to reflect, I can see

how I have grown as a person and how it has inevitably made me stronger.

I believe that every relationship comes into your life for a reason and it is important not to compare

them because they are always going to be different. It is a journey that you travel together where you enjoy

the experiences and love that you share. Relationships can really teach you a lot about yourself. It’s

important to reflect and focus on yourself and what you want before you get involved with someone else.

Taking some time out and getting to know yourself is vital to ensuring you make better choices next time.

The person you are today is because of the experiences that have occurred in your life. Take a moment to

think about all your past relationships and the valuable lessons they have taught you. If anything you

should have a clearer knowledge of what you don’t want.

Don’t look for someone else to complete you; likewise don’t look for a partner who thinks he/she needs

someone to complete them. We are all whole and complete just as we are. Looking for happiness through

someone else ultimately leads to disappointment as only you can make you happy.

Flying solo… Being fulfilled as a person doesn’t always mean you have to be in a romantic relationship.

In fact it’s also great to be single! Try to live in the moment and engage with every aspect of your life.

Take the time to do the things you want to and like to do. For me that means dancing, yoga, hiking,

enjoying good food with great company, or writing. Ask yourself what are the things you most enjoy

doing? Pursue your passions whatever they may be, because whether you’re single or with a partner, your

life’s goals and dreams are your own, and will energise you and make life more meaningful. Sometimes

when you are in a relationship it can be easy to forget the things that you want to do as an individual. You

can be so focused on being a couple that when you are no longer in a relationship it’s harder to find your

feet again. This is a good opportunity for reconnecting and getting back in touch with yourself and what

you need. You also have the time to maintain contact with the friendships that are important to you. It’s

good to always remember that you are not alone. There are other people around you who are also

enjoying the journey of flying solo.

The power of friendship… My friendships are a strength that I know I can rely on. When I have true,

meaningful friendships in my life I know I have the support to handle anything that comes my way. I’ve

always thought that friends are the angels that are sent down to help you along your life’s path. They bring

encouragement, understanding, strength, fun and laughter. Besides my family I know exactly who I’d call