Three Thousand Miles - Forever, (book #3 of Three Thousand Miles, Series) (20 page)

“Come on Adrian we both know that’s not true. You knew that I was pregnant
when we were together, so why are you acting surprised?”

“You told me that you got rid of the baby and then you left. How was I
supposed to know that you lied to me?” Zara rolls her eyes at me and I can feel
my temperature rising – if she wasn’t a woman then I would punch her right
now.

“Because it was so obvious, I lied to you and I left you, but Adrian that was the
biggest mistake of my life.” Zara moves closer to me and she tries to catch my
hand. I bat her away from me as I take several steps backs from her. I run my
fingers though my hair as I check to see that the boy is okay. I briefly smile as I
see him sitting on the ground - gazing down at the fish pond. I turn my
attention back to Zara.

“You leaving was the best thing that has ever happened to me.” Zara looks
furious – again.

“Wake up Adrian, you were devastated when I chose Chad and were mortified
when I told you that I got rid of the baby. You wanted me and you wanted our
baby. You wanted us to be a family and I believe that something inside of you
still wants that. You just have to open your eyes, Adrian.” I lunge forward and
grab Zara.

“What planet are you living on? I don’t love you in fact I despise you. I have
only agreed to see you because of the boy and I will have a family, but it will be
with Alanna and the sooner you realise that the better.” Zara pushes me away
from her as she marches over to William. She leansdown and jerks him
forward and I can see that she has hurt him. He istrying to hold back his tears,
but he can’t as Zara begins to drag him across the pathway, towards me. When
she reaches me William is sobbing and my heart is breaking as I watch her
scowl at him. The more I look at them the more theyremind me of when I was
younger and of me and my mother, Alice. I can remember days like this when
she would pull and shout at me in the same way thatZara is doing with
William. I look into his eyes – the same eyes as mine and I can see myself. I feel
as if I am looking back on an image of myself and it’s alarming and scary to me.
I want to hold onto this little boy as I feel his pain.

“Tell daddy how much you love him,” Zara shockingly says to William. My head
is pounding and I can’t believe what she is saying. I am a stranger to the boy
and how dare she torture this child like this. William looks so scared and his
eyes are full of stress and worry that a five yearold child shouldn’t have. I want
to scream at Zara for the way she is treating him, but I know that I can’t. I can
tell that this child has a difficult life and I wouldn’t want to add to his stress by
shouting at his mother –in front of him. Therefore, I will hold my tongue when
he is around.

“Mummy is he really my daddy?” William asks as he begins to wipe away his
tears with the sleeve of his jacket. I feel sorry for him and I hate that Zara has
told him that I am his father. It must be really confusing for him to understand
all this and I feel that he shouldn’t know what’s going on –until we know for
certain that he is my son. However, I do feel drawn to him and I want to make
nice with Zara as I don’t want her to take him away from me.

“How about I buy you an ice cream, mate?” I say as I take William’s hand in
mine. He smiles up at me and I think that he is relieved that he didn’t have to
obey his mother’s rude and inappropriate orders. I begin to lead William along
the pathway of the zoo and I look back at Zara as we continue to walk.

“Are you coming?” She rolls her eyes at me and her actions have angered me.
I don’t look back her as I continue to walk along the pathway of the zoo
however, I know that she is following us as I can hear her footsteps on the
slabs.

When we reach the ice cream stand I see that it’s closed for winter and now I
have break the news to an already upset child.

“I am sorry mate, but it’s closed. Do you want me to buy you a drink, instead?”
He smiles at me and I am surprised at how upbeat he is and at how nothing –
not even the crying has fazed him. He seems to haveforgotten all that has just
happened and I am starting to think that he is usedto his mother’s neurotic
behaviour. I lead him along the pathway again, butthis time I escort him in
through the doors of the restaurant. I walk him up to the counter and I order a
two teas. I let William chose for himself and I am surprised when he chooses
exactly the kind of thing that I would have chosen as a child. He asks nicely for
a piece of chocolate cake and a glass of apple juice. I pay our drinks and then I
march him over to an empty table – Zara follows behind us. I sit down and I
give him his snack and as he begins to eat, I stare at him as I can see so much
of myself in him. I feel attached to him and now I am anxious and scared to
find out if he is actually my son. I am terrified that if he is then he will turn out
like me. I would hate it if he grew up with the same insecurities and the same
control and anger issues as I do.

“William why don’t you go over and play in the sand pit,” Zara says nicely to
her son. I let out a massive exhale at her stupid behaviour – god I hate this
woman. William smiles at me and then he rushes over to the large sand pit and
he immediately begins to play with another little boy who is playing with toy
tractors in the sand pit. I can’t stop smiling as I look at him and Zara is quick to
point out my emotions.

“You feel connected to him, don’t you?” I take a sip of my tea as I try to hold
my nerve whilst I speak to Zara.

“I’m not pleased with how you grabbed him back there. That type of behaviour
is unacceptable and if I am his father then I can assure you that I won’t stand
for you abusing him like that. Is that clear?” Zara blushes and I feel that I have
embarrassed her by confronting about her actions – but I don’t care as I am
not going to stand back and watch a child be hurt regardless if that child is
mine or not.

“I didn’t mean to hurt him, but I am just not cut out to be a mother.” I laugh at
Zara’s pathetic excuse.

“Then answer me this, why did you keep him if you weren’t cut out to be
mum?” Zara blushes again and I feel that I am making her feel uneasy – I like
this feeling.

“When I left I was miserable and I did think about aborting the baby, but I
couldn’t because he was the only part of you that Ihad left. William is your son
and you know it. Please let us be in your life.” I shake my head at her.
“If he is my boy then he will be a major part of my life. I will provide him with
everything that he needs and I will be the best father that I can be, but there is
no place for you in my life.”

“You can’t honestly be telling me that you are happy with that little American
gold-digger?” I can feel the colour draining from my face at her words. How
dare she bad mouth Alanna? Zara is not fit to kiss her shoes let alone stand
next to her. I will not let her off with talking bad about my wife.

“Shut up, I can’t listen to you. Don’t you ever bad–mouth her again. Alanna is
worth a million of you and you may be the mother of my child, but Alanna will
always have my heart and that’s something that you will never have.” Zara
holds back her tears as I my firm words ring in the air. Her hands are beginning
to tremble and I know that she is just trying to play me for a fool. I am not
going to fall for her absurd actions.

“Adrian why are so mean to me when I have done nothing but love you?”

“Love me? You are saying that you loved me when all you did was use me to
make your husband jealous. You wrecked our family and you tore my bother
away from me.”

“Everything I did was out of love and anyway you are better off away from
that family. They are poisonous and they will rip every inch of goodness that
you have from you. Trust me Adrian you are better off without the Jenkins
family.” My head is spinning and I can’t listen to her foul words any longer. I
jump out of the seat and now I am towering over Zara as she looks up at me.
“Please don’t leave.” She pleads with me to stay and I feel that I should stay as
I look over and see William staring at me. I want to stay for him, but if I am to
put up with Zara, then I will need a few moments away from her. I need to cool
down or perhaps I will say and do something that I will live to regret. I
straighten myself out as I push my hair away from my forehead.

“I need a minute,” she smiles at me, but I don’t return her gesture as I walk
away from the table. I march outside and into the zoo once again. I begin to
pace around the pathways and then I march over therailing where I gaze down
into the fish pond. My head is pounding and my heart is aching -god I wish that
Alanna was here. With an image of her in my mind, Ireach into my inside
jacket pocket and I take out my BlackBerry. I look through my contacts until I
find her name. I hit send and I wait with heart in my mouth until she answers.

“Hey doll,”
she says in her sweet American accent. I feel complete as I hear her
voice.

 

“Baby, where are you? Are you okay?”

“Yes, yes, I’m fine. How’s it going with William and the witch that is his
mother?”
I smirk at her words and then I fill my baby in on what’s been going
on. I don’t hold anything back as I don’t want to keep anymore secrets from
her – I have enough things that I am hiding from her already and I don’t want
to add to the list. Her reaction is spot on as she replies.

“I have to say that I am glad that I’m not there. I couldn’t watch her miss treat
William and I couldn’t listen to her throwing herself at you.”
“Baby, you know that I don’t feel anything for her, right?”
“Of course I know that, but I also knew that she still has feelings for you. It’s so
obvious in the way that she looks at you.”

“She is nothing to me.”
Alanna sighs down the phone and I bask in the sound of
her breathing.
“Baby, why didn’t you answer me when I asked you where you
were?”
The phone is silent as I await her fluid reply.

“I went to see Michael and I am with him right now. I hope you don’t mind?”
“Alanna, have you told him about my meeting with Zara?”

“No, I never said a word to him. I’m outside in the garden right now and he is
inside, he can’t hear me.”
My heart races and then slows down again, but my
mind is rushing as I think of her with him. Michael is my brother and although
he has said that he has moved on from Alanna I still don’t trust him around
her. Michael has the tendency to get obsessed withpeople and I am convinced
that he has an obsession with Alanna. I know that she cares deeply for him and
I wouldn’t want to hurt her by taking Michael away from her, but I do feel that
she is yet to meet the real him. Before Alanna came into our lives Michael
wasn’t in a good place. What many people don’t know about Michael is that he
is a college drop-out and he fell into a deep depression when he left Oxford. It
all started when he met this girl, Becky. She was in the same class as him at
college and he was smitten by this girl. She had long blonde hair and deep
brown eyes. Her skin was pale and she was a pretty girl and when she caught
the eye of Michael she was ecstatic – at first. Becky had a deep kind heart and
she didn’t like to disappoint anyone so when Michael asked her to be his
girlfriend she agreed out of loyalty to him. The first few months of their
courtship was normal, but by the end of the summer term things weren’t going
as planned –for Michael. Becky had told him that she just wanted to be friends
and that she didn’t feel strongly enough for him to be his girlfriend. So she
ended things with him and that’s when Michael changed forever.

“Okay, please don’t tell him. Oh and Alanna, how isMichael today?”

“He seems rather quiet actually and he hasn’t said anything to me about Chad.
But don’t worry, I will make him see sense one way or another.”
Alanna’s words
alerts me into action, I can’t let her question Michael on his relationship with
Chad who knows what will happen to her if she does.

“No baby, don’t ask Michael about Chad it will only anger him and you know
that you don’t want that. He will realise in time that he is making a mistake by
having him in his life.”
I try to convince Alanna, but I know that she will have a
stubborn reaction to my demands.

“I can’t just sit by and let Chad destroy Michael’s life.”
“Alanna, please just don’t, okay?”
I can hear as she huffs and puffs at my
words, but she soon agrees with what I am asking of her.

“Okay I won’t. Now you better get back to William.”
I breathe a sigh of relief
and then I end the call. I shove my phone back intomy pocket and I inhale a
deep breath of air as I can’t get the image of Becky out of my head. I haven’t
allowed myself to think about her in so long and Ihave especially tried to put
what happened to the back of my mind.

When Becky ended her two month fling with Michael he started to act out in
desperate ways. He would sit by her house every night - without fail, hoping
that she would change her mind and take him back. When Becky didn’t
respond to him stopping by her house Michael decided that he needed to up
his game. So he started to send her flowers and chocolates and when she
finally confronted him and told him to stay away from her, that’s when the
threating messages started. Becky’s parents grew tired of his obsessive
behaviour so they called the police and Michael was taken into custody and he
was given a formal warning. Things after that started to calm down, Michael
went back to class and Becky carried on with her life, but Michael’s obsession
was still very much a factor in his life. I saw first-hand how hurt he was when
she broke up him and I was terrified when I walked into his college room to see
that there were pictures all over the walls of Becky. He must have been
following her and that’s when I realised that Michael needed help. I sat him
down and I talked with him for hours and he was mortified that I had found
out what he was up to and he was quick to react. He assured me that he was
just looking out for her and that’s why he had her followed. Of course I didn’t
believe him, but I did recognise that he needed me to stand by him. I stayed
with him for a few days and I called Charles who immediately came to our aid.
Charles booked Michael into therapy and after a while he seemed to regain a
sense of normality – or at least that’s what he led us to believe. Michael
continued to harass Becky by sending her threating texts and calling her at all
hours of the night. Becky’s parents grew so worried about her safety that they
eventually sent her away to live with her grandparents in Spain. But Michael
still found a way to get to her and in the end up Becky couldn’t cope any
longer, so she took her own life. When I found out about what had happened
to Becky I was, horrified. I couldn’t bear to look at Michael because I knew that
he had forced her into such a drastic action. She was just a young girl who had
her whole life in front of her and I can’t understand or forgive Michael for what
he did to her. Becky’s parents were convinced that Michael was to blame, but
because it was a suicide case and the fact that it happened outside of the UK
meant that they had no case. The police didn’t question Michael, after all he is
from a very respectable family and of course he had nothing to do with what
happened – so Michael got away with driving an innocent girl to suicide. His
family – including me stood by him. He dropped out of college and he came
back to London – back to his life. He acted as if nothing had happened – at
least for a while. Thing’s became too much for him and he started to slip into
depression. He wouldn’t eat or sleep, he just binged his life away on alcohol
and parties. Charles and Tabatha were worried thathe was going to hurt
himself, but I knew that he wouldn’t. Someone likeMichael is very conscious of
their own safety. He knew exactly what to say to the police so that they would
rule him out as a suspect in Becky’s suicide. He has a way of manipulating
people into believing what he says. I should know as I have fallen into the trap
many times. Michael carried on his depression for month or so and then he
surprised everyone by changing completely. He acted as if nothing had
happened and this time he did return to normal. He stared to work with
Charles at the company and he would make sure that he had dinner with his
parents every Sunday. He even started to attend company events and that’s
when he saw Alanna. He was immediately drawn to her and I watched as she
became his new obsession. Michael watched Alanna’s every move that night
and I was terrified for her safety. My anxiety stared to build when I saw him
outside her hotel room and when she told me about the rose I knew that
Michael was only getting started. He sent Alanna those Lamborghini car keys
and he made out that it was a threat from the Marshalls, but as soon as Alanna
told me about them I knew that it was Michael who had sent them to her. I
tried to tell her to stay away from him, but I knew that it would be impossible
for her do that. Michael saved her life and I will always owe him everything for
that, but I will not stand around and let Alanna be Michael’s obsession.