Threads of Steel (Bayou Cove) (8 page)

Anna Marie touched Miss Ellie’s white hair then placed a finger on the tucks of her white blouse.

Nancy sniffled and held Anna’s hand. Neither said a word. A gentleman who resembled Miss Ellie reached out his hand. “Thank you so much for
the
flowers. Someone told me who you two were when you walked in. My sister always spoke highly of you. She loved you.”

“And we loved her,” said Nancy and Anna Marie together.

The man looked straight at Anna Marie. “Are you Miss
LaFaire
?”

Anna Marie took his hand and held it longer than necessary. “You can’t imagine how sorry I am. If there was something I could’ve done, you know I would have.”

The gentleman nodded, but didn’t respond
.

They were introduced to several of Miss Ellie’s nephews and nieces and a grandson who refused to shake Anna Marie’s hand. One older lady stared at her as if she wanted to say something, but didn’t open her mouth. Anna Marie took the hint, told her she was sorry and turned to leave. The room had gotten silent. She felt as though all eyes were on her.

She held her head up without actually making eye-contact with anyone and headed out the door. Nancy followed close behind. They hadn’t talked about staying until the night viewing was over, but Anna Marie knew she couldn’t stay.

The evening air had cooled slightly by the time they’d reached the parking lot. Anna Marie took a breath. “I’m glad that’s over.”

“I think you did just fine.” Nancy dug through her purse for her key,
then
looked around the parking lot. “I wonder why they didn’t come,” Nancy asked as Anna Marie walked with her toward her car.

“If you’re talking about Ronnie and Dot, I don’t know, and I don’t care. They might be here tomorrow, but as I said before, it won’t matter if they’re not.”

“As you say,” Nancy said with a flip of her head and a quirky smile. “As you say,” she repeated and gave her friend a quick hug
.

CHAPTER
5

The next morning Anna Marie chose a pew in the back church where Miss Ellie’s funeral would be held. As soon as she’d entered the carved doors, she was surrounded by scents of candle wax and wood, reminding her of her childhood Sundays.

Wearing a black suit and black heels, she hoped she’d blend in with all the other mourners and no one would notice her. The back pew suited her just fine.

Nancy would fly through the back doors a few minutes before the service so she’d probably have company, but if Nancy didn’t see her, that would be okay as well. At times like these, a moment alone is sometimes better than one shared.

Family and friends filed through the massive double doors, most of them she’d seen at the visitation last night. Some walked up front to pay their respects to the family. Some chose their pews. Several people looked at her on the sly, but didn’t speak.

She tried not to look for
Doti
or Ronnie. It was hard to pretend she didn’t care if they were here or not.

Ronnie never remarried after his and
Doti’s
divorce. Even so, she had to assume he’d grown up and taken on the responsibilities of an adult—something he hadn’t done during her own short marriage to him and obviously during the time he was married to
Doti
.

Responsible adults don’t find themselves in the jams he’d faced. Maybe if he’d grown into such a man and showed some remorse for what he’d done, maybe, just maybe, she‘d quit harboring whatever those feelings were that twisted her insides every time she allowed herself to think of her past. She refused to believe she still hadn’t forgiven them, but it was hard to ignore the anger she felt when she thought about their affair.

She felt sure
Doti
would come to the funeral. How could she not? Even if Miss Ellie didn’t approve of her lifestyle, she had been such a meaningful part of
Doti’s
earlier life.
Doti’s
absence at the visitation bothered Anna Marie. It had to be her health, but nothing else could be more important than saying goodbye to someone so dear to them.

As Anna Marie’s thoughts settled on
Doti’s
health, the back door opened. She looked up in time to see Ronnie step into the dim light. He hesitated, looked around the church,
then
walked to the opposite side
.

Anna Marie watched him excuse himself and slide into the middle of the last pew.

Age had done nothing but add to his good looks. He wore a white button-up shirt open at the collar and a pair of dress pants. His six-foot frame had filled out over the last few years and he’d obviously kept in shape since his latest divorce.

She guessed that ought to please her. It didn’t. In fact, the idea that he looked even better today than in high school irked her. Maybe had he not been so damned good-looking,
Doti
would’ve kept her hands off him.

Nancy had asked if she still loved Ronnie. How could she think such a thing? Love wasn’t anywhere near what she now felt for the man.

Anger surprised her.

She’d told Nancy that she’d forgiven him and
Doti
, but had she? She looked at the altar of the church and felt horrible. She was sitting in a church and couldn’t find the decency to offer her ex a smile.

She looked back and tried to be discreet as she watched him settle down for the service. He
looked so ill-at-ease, she almost felt sorry for him. Pulling her attention away from Ronnie, she opened her small clutch bag and found a tissue, but before looking up, she felt Ronnie’s stare. She raised her head and turned slowly knowing he was looking in her direction. When she caught his eye, he didn’t turn away
.

He looked at her with the eyes of the man with whom she’d fallen in love, the young man who’d taken her from being a girl to being a woman and the man with whom she thought she’d spend the rest of her life.

When he winked at her and offered a slight smile, anger again flashed through her body. She acknowledged him with a slight nod,
then
turned her head. She might be in church, but there was no reason to be a hypocrite and feign a smile.

“You see him, huh?

Nancy slid in next to her before she realized her friend had entered the church.

“Yes, I saw him come in.”

“He’s still looking this way.”

“Yeah, well, he can find someone else to smirk at.”

Nancy leaned f
orward to look around Anna Marie
and waved to him. “He hasn’t taken his eye off you.”

“Nancy.
Stop.”

“You could at least smile back at him.”

Anna Maria leaned against the wooden back of the pew, reached out a hand and gently pushed Nancy back as well. “I’ll do no such thing. If I run into him later, I’ll talk with him, but I’m not going to smile like everything is hunky dory between us.”

“I told you, you need to forgive him.”

When she did nothing but stare back at her friend, Nancy settled back against the wooden pew. “
Doti’s
not here, is she?”

“I haven’t seen her if she is.”

“I called her home phone last night. . .”

Anna Marie snapped her head to look at Nancy. “You called
Doti
? Why?”

“Miss Ellie died. I thought that was a good excuse to touch base, but no one answered. I don’t know her cell number. I called a number from the phone book that I thought might be her.”

“The number she gave me was also her home phone so I can’t help you.”

Nancy let out a loud breath. “Maybe she’ll show up before the
day’s
over.”

But she didn’t.

By the time the last prayers were said at the cemetery, and
Doti
hadn’t shown, Anna Marie had a feeling that
Doti
had to be really sick, maybe in the hospital. Several friends from their high school days agreed with them as they talked following the service. One of them actually brought up the subject of Anna Marie’s dad and said she was sorry.

Nancy excused herself and pulled out her phone. Knowing she was worried about the children, Anna Marie wondered how she handled the responsibility of having four children. A nice responsibility, she thought to herself—one she’d probably never know.

“Anna Marie?
”

She turned to find Ronnie standing behind her. Glad she had the time in church to let her anger seethe a little before talking with him face-to-face, she now pulled up a small smile. “Ronnie.”

He nodded. “It’s been a long time.”

“Yes, it has.”

A long awkward silence stood between them.

She spoke first. “I saw you in church.”

“Yeah.
I wasn’t sure I should even come to the funeral,” he said. “Miss Ellie wasn’t exactly my best fan. But, well, I couldn’t let her go without saying goodbye.”

Anna Marie knew all too well how Miss Ellie wasn’t his fan, but she let it go. “We all need closure,” she said instead.

She looked up and again saw the sadness in his face she’d witnessed in church—but just as quickly as it came, it was gone, replaced with his quirky smile that threatened to bring back the anger she’d felt earlier.

He looked around. “She had quite a send-off.”

Remembering why they were standing in this cemetery, she pushed aside the fact that this man had torn her dreams apart. She tried to answer with civility. “I’m glad. I think the only person we’re missing is
Doti
.”

His head snapped up at the mention of her name.
“Yeah.
It was hard not to notice. Maybe she felt the same way as I did. You know, not wanting to offend Miss Ellie’s memory by coming.”

“I don’t think that’s it at all. You don’t know, do you?”

“Know what?”

“
Doti
might be sick.”

His dark eyes told her he didn’t know.”

“I don’t want to spread rumors,” she said, “but Nancy and I think she might be having some health problems.” She went on to tell him what she knew.

He stuck his hands in his pockets. “I hadn’t heard anything. I don’t have much contact with anyone around here. I stay around the Birmingham area. I hope what you say isn’t true, you know, about
Doti
.”

“Me too.”

He gave her another half-smile. “You don’t still hate her—and me—do you?”

Anna Marie looked around, then back to Ronnie, wanting more than anything to lash out at him, to get the pent-up anger out of her, but today wasn’t about her and Ronnie. It was about Miss Ellie.

She took a deep breath. “I keep telling everyone I don’t hate you two,” she said, “but, like Miss Ellie, I’m not either of your fans.”

“Don’t blame you.”

She watched him swallow, stick his hands in his pocket and look away from her. Again the wall of silence separated the two of them.

She wanted to say everything was okay between them but she couldn’t. She knew she had a good, successful life right now in New Orleans, but it wasn’t the life she’d envisioned herself in, and even though she tried not to hate the man, she still blamed him and
Doti
for having to reroute her life’s dreams.

Would Ronnie ever remarry after his short marriages to
Doti
and to herself? Had he grown up at all? Or had his idea of the institution of marriage been blighted like hers.

“Are you still in New Orleans?”

She pulled her attention to his question, surprised that he knew where she lived. “Yes. I have a design business with a partner. We’re growing every day. In fact, I probably shouldn’t be here. It’s the beginning of our peak season, but I couldn’t stay away.”

“I’m glad to know you’ve made a success of yourself. I’m not surprised. I always knew you
were the smart one in the group.”

“Well, I don’t know if you’d call me a success or smart, but I am happy with what I do.”

Since I can’t have the cozy home, loving husband and children as I dreamed of having.

She cleared her throat. “And I love going to work every day. What about you?”

“I’m still in sales. Gives me a chance to move around when I want. I do a little construction on the side too.”

That’s what she wanted to know, and he’d answered her question without having to ask. He was still roaming, unable to put down roots. He hadn’t changed a bit.

“But, I might be looking at a steady job when I get back. I’m not too sure about staying in one place for long, but maybe age is catching up with me.”

She looked at him closely. Had he finally started to grow up? “I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you with the job—if that’s what you want.”