Their New Beginning (Oh Captain, My Captain #5) (11 page)

Avery

Damn Jax and his great kissing skills. I groan in frustration as I clean up from the lunch we had. I walk into the living room and I can tell that he’s still in pain. I know that he didn’t take any pain pills today. I grab one for him and a bottle of water.

“Take this and go lay down.”

I’m ready to fight him because I know he’s going to protest, but surprisingly, he doesn’t. He takes the pill, kisses me once more, and heads to the bedroom. His arm must be killing him to do so without complaint.

While he is upstairs, I make a quick list of what we need from the grocery store. It’s obvious that Jax hadn’t been to the store at all since I left. I go to the bedroom to check on Jax, and he’s out like a light. I jot a quick note, letting him know I’m heading to the store.

After a couple hours at the store getting everything that we need, I head back to the house. I check on Jax, who’s still asleep, and then I put everything away. I think about Jax and the fact that the roles have reversed. Now, he’s fighting for our marriage, and I’m the one pushing away.

Why?

Isn’t he what I want?

The truth is he’s the only one I want. There’s no one else but Jax.

A smile appears on my face thinking about our fourth date. It’s the one where I told him I loved him, and the first time we had sex. The only way to describe that night is magical. If I could have dreamt up a perfect date, it was that one.

The problem is, now, it’s the hardest one to recreate. I push the thought out of my mind and figure out what I’m going to make for dinner. I lay everything out and I figure I should check on Jax. He should be waking soon. I grab the one thing from the bag that I know my help him and go to his bedroom.

Our bedroom.

I shake my head.

When I open the door, he’s sitting on the side of the bed. He’s shirtless and in his boxer briefs. He leans up, looking at me, and smiles. I gaze up and down his chest. If there’s one thing that I can say about Jax: the man has great abs and a hard chest.

The first time I saw him with his shirt off, I know I drooled on myself. I’ve seen hard bodies before. I mean, come on, this is Vegas. They’re like a dime a dozen, but Jax’s is different. Jax’s is more defined because of the hard work he puts in on the ice.

“I brought you a surprise,” I tell him, trying to not rip off my clothes and jump him at that very moment.

“You did?”

“Yes. Sit back against the headboard.”

He does. After I realize that after telling him to do that, this might be harder than I thought.

“What’s wrong?”

I shake my head. “Don’t read more into this than what it is,” I tell him in firmly. I push the covers down farther on the bed, and I straddle him.

“I’m liking this.”

I lightly slap his non-injured shoulder. “I’m helping you. Take off your sling.”

“I’d rather take off your clothes.”

“Stop. Now.”

He rolls his eyes at me, but does as I ask. I rub the Icy-Hot cream in my hands and begin to softly, but firmly, rub his shoulder. He winces slightly.

“Sorry.” I continue to rub. “You need to put a heating pad on it today. Just for twenty minutes. I figure you should be back on the ice in a week or so.”

“So, you’re a doctor now?”

“No, I’m not; I’m making an observation.” I continue to rub his shoulder for another minute. I don’t need to, but I’m enjoying teasing him a little bit. Mainly because he’s usually the one doing it to me. “Do you need anything else?” I ask before I leave my position on him.

“You could just stay here and keep rubbing.”

“Your shoulder, right?”

He smirks. “Of course.”

I shake my head. “Liar. However, I do want to ask you a question. Would you like to have date tonight?”

“Yeah, we should probably leave the house at some point today.”

“Well,” I sigh. “I was trying to do date number four, but you know I can’t recreate that. So, let’s settle on a movie and dinner, okay?”

“Just because we can’t do all of it doesn’t mean we can’t do it all together. We can still go see a musical.”

“Jax, you hate musicals. The only reason you went all out that time is because you were hoping to get laid.”

“I did not,” he frowns. “I did it because I knew you’d love it. That’s the only reason, Avery.”

“Don’t get upset. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to get you stressed out. Why don’t you rest some more and we can figure out something, okay?”

“I’m tired of resting,” Jax smiles.

“Fine. Do whatever you want because I’m going to get ready and we can go out to eat dinner.”

I climb off his lap and rush down to the kitchen. I put up the food I was going to use to make dinner. The thoughts of that date night keeps playing around in my head. I go to the office and find the box that I know hides every precious moment of our
short-lived
dating experience.

I sit on the office couch and look at the Playbill of Grease. It’s one of my favorites to go and see. Each actor and actress had signed it. I look at the few pictures of me backstage with the same performers who were just on the stage, singing and dancing. And there’s Jax with me. I know how much he hates musicals. Give him an action movie any day of the week, and he’ll be happy. However, he goes with me anytime I asked him to, just like a good husband would.

Now, look at him. He’s fighting for our marriage, and I don’t know if I can let him. What happens if we ever see Rob again? I mean, I know Vegas isn’t small, but what were the odds we’d see him that night?

I shake my head, looking through the box. The dried flowers, the ticket stubs, the puck where he scored the first time with me in the stands. All these memories, all these small experiences, made us... well...
us
.

We did everything fast. He never stops for a second, and I’m the same way.

Am I?

Am I that girl that said yes to marriage after six weeks of dating?

Am I that twenty-one year old who fell in love with a guy after four dates?

No. I’m the wife of a man I loved the second I saw him at the nurse’s station with six sandwiches. I love that guy.

Regina’s words bounce in my head. Do I have one more round left in me? Maybe I do. But, I don’t want to go too fast. What if he changes his mind? I don’t think I can take that,
again
.

I close the box and put it away. I log on to the laptop and find a musical that has good reviews, and tickets are still available. I call Jax’s favorite steakhouse and make a reservation.

Jax is in the living room, and I tell him that we need to get ready, because we’re going out soon. He gives me the smile that still makes my knees weak, and we both get ready. I have to help Jax a little bit with his shirt and tie, but he gets it done.

I drive since he is still in a sling, and there’s a smile on his face when I pull up to the valet at the restaurant.

“How am I going to cut a steak, Avery?”

I tilt my head not sure what he means. Then I remember that he’s in a sling. “I’ll do it for you.” I shrug. “Or you can pick it pick it up with one hand and eat it like a barbarian?”

He takes my hand as we walk in. “You called me that one other time. Do you remember?”

I try to remember when I did that, and I gasp. It was the night I stayed all night at his crappy apartment. He had thrown me over his shoulder and tossed me on the bed. “I’d forgotten that.” I smile at the memory.

We’re seated right away, and of course, Jax orders a massive steak. Our conversation is light. It’s mainly about Reed, the drum set, and how Brooke isn’t pleased with us.

I know that I shouldn’t bring up the topic, but I want to know where he stands on it now.

“Jax, this isn’t probably the best time to talk about this, but have you thought about us and kids? I mean, I know that we said we would wait, but do you see a future like that?”

“Of course, I do. I don’t know when, but yeah, I see it. Do you?”

“I did before all this happened.” I wave my hand in between us. “I know I shouldn’t be thinking about it now, but I see how you are with Reed, and I was wondering. I think you’d make a great father.”

“You’d be a wonderful mother, Avery.” He pauses for a second before asking, “You don’t see it anymore?”

I look into his dark brown eyes, and I see a hint of sadness in them. I take a deep breath and know that I have to be honest with him. “I don’t know anymore, Jax. I want to work on
us
first and make sure we make it. You know how I feel about broken homes with kids. I can’t do that to my, or our, child. I don’t want them growing up like Regina and I did. It’s too sad. I’d always hoped that it would be more like your parents. You know, they’ve been married forever, they’re always happy, that sort of life.”

“I want all of those things, too. When my parents came to visit, I kept thinking about that. How happy they always are after all this time. I want that too, with you.” He reaches for my hand.

“I know that. I do. I was just wondering.” I think for a second, trying to keep our conversation open, and keep us talking about our lives. “I have been meaning to say something to you, and please don’t look at me like I’m crazy because I think you forgot, too, but,” I clear my throat and sit taller in my chair. “I’m sorry I gave you divorce papers on our anniversary.”

Jax gives me a small smile. “It wasn’t exactly how I planned our fifth anniversary, but it’s not like you purposely picked that day.”

“I promise I didn’t. But,” I smile back at him. “What would you have planned? I mean, if all this hadn’t happened.”

“I would have sent you flowers, taken you to your favorite restaurant, and then surprised you with a long trip this summer to anywhere in the world you wanted to go.”

“Even to New York City to see
several
musicals?” I tease him.

He laughs harder as our food arrives. I do cut his food for him since he’s unable. Jax leans in close to my ear. “Even to New York City. Even if you wanted to see one every single day we were there.”

“Well, that’s better than what I had planned for you,” I mumble, pushing the plate back to him.

“What are you talking about?” He takes a bite of his steak.

When I’d thought out the plan for his gift, I wasn’t nervous at all. I thought it would have been perfect for him, something he always wanted. Now, since everything is different between us, I’m unsure what he’ll think.

“I got you this.” I reach into my purse, where I’ve been keeping it. I didn’t want him to find it. “A while ago, I saw online that Mario Lemieux was auctioning off personal memorabilia for his charity. That is a puck that he signed, from the 1992 Stanley Cup game. I know he was your favorite player, and there are only three of them. He has one, the owner of the team at the time, and you. So, there you go.” I shrug, trying to act like my hands aren’t shaking as I hand it to him.

He stares at it like it’s the Holy Grail. “Wow, Avery. Thank you. I... I…” He looks back me confused. “How were my plans better than this?”

“Because you would rather eat broccoli then sit through a musical. I know how much you dislike them and broccoli. Nonetheless, you were willing to go through all that trouble for me, and I hope you like your gift. I thought it would be something for you.”

“You’re my wife and you love musicals, it wouldn’t be me ‘going through all that trouble.’ I think you’re wrong, anyway.” He gives me a little smile. “I rather go to a musical than eat broccoli.”

I laugh at his child-like statement. “That’s why you and Reed get along so well.” I look at him and very seriously tell him why I did it. “I wanted to get you something that you would remember. I don’t think you ever know how special I felt every day with you, up until everything started changing. You were everything I ever wanted in a husband. And you still are. I do love you. I do want this to work, but I want to go slow because I don’t think I can take you walking away from me again.”

He quickly shoves the gift back in my hand, and resumes eating. I’m not sure what to make of it.

“I love it, Avery, but I shouldn’t have it. It’s a very thoughtful gift, but I don’t deserve it from you. I stopped making you feel special, Avery, yet you gave me something like that. I don’t deserve for you to give it to me. And I’m never walking away. That’s not something I’ve done before, and I don’t plan to change that.” Jax isn’t looking at me; he’s looking down. His voice is low, and I hear it crack. I don’t know if I should be honored or offended.

Yeah, I’m pissed.

“Jax, I spent twenty four hours on the laptop refreshing the screen just to ensure that I had the highest bid. I got this for you because I love you. I barely ate or even peed that day because you’ve gone to thirty-eight musicals with me. You take care of all my bills and my clothes. I mean, Christ, you bought me a new car just because you felt like it that day. You deserve this gift more than any other person I know because you’re a great guy, a selfless husband, and above all, I know you want it. This is more than an ‘I love you’ gift. This is a ‘thank you for everything’ gift. I want you to have this. I want you to display it, and when you look at it, you might remember how special it was when I gave it to you. This is yours. Period.”