Read The Other Half of My Soul Online
Authors: Bahia Abrams
fourteen
In each journey of your life you must be where you are. You may only be passing through on your way to somewhere more important. Nevertheless, there is purpose in where you are right now.
—The Rebbe Menachem Mendel Schneerson
“The Triple Frontier! You want to take me to the Triple Frontier for our honeymoon? You must be out of your mind!”
Rami could not understand why Rayna was reacting so vehemently. At the library, he had mulled through books about the place and had spoken to two different travel agents to learn more. Rami wanted to show Rayna the most spectacular waterfalls in the world and the greatest hydroelectric dam on earth. He wanted her to experience a place she had never been, a place where Yousef intended him to be.
I want Rayna to know everything about me. Why does she not see this?
“Okay, if the Triple Frontier is not the place you want to go, then tell me what your idea of a moonhaven is.”
“Honeymoon! The word is
honey-moon
! There’s no such word as moonhaven. Get it straight!”
“Then where . . .”
“The beach . . .”
“The beach? You can always go to the beach. You were at the beach for a whole week during winter break. Remember . . . with Jonathan in Curaçao?” Rami’s stabbing words added fuel to the fire.
“That’s a low thing to say to me.”
“Well, I think what you said to me was also low. I went to great efforts to plan a very special trip for us, something you would always remember . . .”
“Oh, you bet I would always remember. How could you even think of taking me to such a lawless place?”
“Maybe you should have married Jonathan. He would have taken you on a Jewish honeymoon to the beach and . . . and may . . . ” Impulsively, Rami stopped. He did not like where their harsh words were leading.
“Don’t you ever bring Jonathan into our disagreements.
Ever!
This is between you and me. No one else.”
Rami regretted their bickering. “I apologize. I was wrong to say what I did. Please, I do not want to argue like this.” He wrapped his arms around Rayna. “I love you more than my life. You are my life. I would not ever knowingly put you in danger. In your heart, you must know that.” He kissed her mouth.
“Then why did you choose such a place for our honeymoon?”
“We will be staying on the Brazil side . . .”
“I don’t care which side it’s on. Argentina. Paraguay. Brazil. It’s all the Triple Frontier to me.”
Rami pulled out captioned pictures from his bookbag. “Look.” He attempted to show her the beauty of the region.
Rayna ignored the prints. “What else? What is the real reason?”
“I want you to know everything about me. Everywhere I am . . .”
“What about our safety? My safety?”
“No harm will come to you. You will be with me every minute. I promise. The place attracts over a million tourists each year, maybe more. Do you think so many people would visit if it were unsafe?”
“What if we bump into Yousef or . . .”
“We will not be anywhere near Yousef. He will never know that you and I made this trip.”
“Something tells me we shouldn’t . . .”
“Have I steered you wrong, yet?”
“Don’t even ask me that question.”
Rami did not want to linger on the subject. He knew she was right. “If you really do not want to go, it is okay.” Still, he hoped she would reconsider. “You choose a place for our
moonhaven
,” he smiled. “I trust your judgment.”
“Honeymoon,” she rectified with an easy grin.
“Yes, honeymoon.”
* * *
After completing final exams and securing visas for their trip to South America, Rami helped Rayna move out of the dorm. Packing the car with her belongings, they were going to Brooklyn. Thanks to Eli, Rayna was on her way home and Rami was joining her as a guest in the Mishan house. Eli had championed his sister’s cause, just as he had done so many times before. Grudgingly, Abe and Sarah caved in, just as they had done so many times before. The family dynamics continued as usual.
* * *
“We’ll have dinner around eight when your father gets home,” Sarah said to Rayna.
Rami promised himself to be on his best behavior and appre-ciated Rayna’s family tolerating him, a Muslim, as a guest in their home. He would not take advantage of their hospitality and reminded himself of his own father’s fanatic intolerance. He understood Abe and Sarah’s strong expectations for all of their children to marry Jews, preferably religious Syrian Jews. Rami felt a tinge of remorse about the devastating blow his marriage to Rayna would cause them once they found out. “Sarah, you and Abe are more than kind to welcome me into your home. From my heart, I thank you.”
“Welcome isn’t the right word, Rami. It’s more like coercion. You can thank Eli, not me.”
I owe Eli a lot for this
, he noted.
* * *
“Aha, you’re all out here in the sunroom.” Eli pecked his mother’s cheek, put his arms out for a hug from his sister, gave Rami a high-five, and plopped himself down on the large curved sectional. “I just finished my last exam and I’m zonked.” Eli had received his undergraduate degree from New York University and had one more year left for his MBA at the same school. Between studies, he worked for his father, who was growing more and more dependent on Eli.
Rosa, the housekeeper, brought in a tray of cinnamon iced tea and Syrian pastries. The conversation politely centered on school, family, and the upcoming summer. Fidgeting from lack of physical activity, Eli rose from the leather furniture. Subtly, he coaxed Rami. “I really need to unwind. Traffic was nerve shattering coming home from the city.”
“Uh-oh. Until my brother finds himself a serious girlfriend, there’s only one way for him to unwind,” Rayna laughed.
“Rami, how would you like to shoot some baskets?” Eli wheedled.
“Shoot baskets?”
“Basketball,” Rayna laughed. “Eli wants you to play basketball with him at the gym.”
“Ahhh, yes, basketball.” Looking to Rayna, Rami shrugged his shoulders.
“I guarantee you have never played basketball until you have experienced the game with Eli. Go enjoy yourself.”
“Give me ten minutes to get out of these clothes.” Eli gestured to Rami, “Come on up. I’ve got plenty for you to change into.”
* * *
“Mom, we’ll be back by seven-thirty. That’ll give us half an hour to shower before dinner.”
Observing her husband and her brother leaving in their shorts and tank tops, Rayna noted their similarities.
Slender, strong physiques. Closely matched height and weight
.
Olive skin. Soft, curly dark hair. Large brown eyes
. She smiled to herself. In very different ways, she loved them both.
Growing up, the bond between Rayna and Eli was unmistakable. Of all her brothers, Eli was the one who always sheltered her. She hated deceiving him now, hated not telling him the truth about her marriage.
Soon, when I come back from the Triple Frontier, I will tell Eli everything
. “Mom, can I help you with dinner?”
“No, thanks. Everything is prepared and Rosa is here to help.” On the sofa, Sarah moved closer to her daughter. “Your absence was noticed over Passover.”
“Has Dad calmed down?”
“Well, you know how your dad gets when it comes to you. Why don’t you go up to your room, unpack and get settled while there’s some quiet time in the house.”
“Mom . . . Mom . . .” Rayna hesitated. “Mom . . . some of my girlfriends from school are going to the beach this week to relax after finals and term papers. They invited me to join them and I’d like to go, especially since I’ll be working in the city all summer.”
A lie
.
“Rayna, is that necessary? Why must you go away to a beach when we live at the shore all summer? We have a magnificent house in Deal and the whole Syrian community will be there and . . . no, you can’t go. I don’t know these friends you’re talking about. No!”
“But, Mom, I have an internship at
InterContinental Weekly
working five days a week all summer long. These are really close friends from school and . . .”
“You already said that. Are they Jewish?”
“Of course they’re Jewish. I know them from Hillel. Please, Mom. Just for one week, before I start work.”
A bigger lie.
“What beach?”
“Ummm . . . Charleston.”
Another lie
.
“What Charleston?”
“Charleston, South Carolina.”
“South Carolina? Rayna, do you know how far that is? How do you intend to get there?”
“Rami will drive me back to school. From there, I’ll ride down to Charleston with my girlfriends. We’re renting a condo for the week. We’ll be together the whole time.”
More lies
.
“Rami is driving you back to school?” Sarah’s tone turned harsh. “Just how much of a friendship is this with you and Rami? I’m not stupid, Rayna.”
“Mom, we’re just friends. That’s all. Honest. He’s a really nice guy. Why do all of my friends have to be females and Jewish?”
“Because it doesn’t look good the other way, that’s why. Think of our reputation in the community. Think of your own reputation as an unmarried female. Your friendship with that Muslim will end. Tomorrow, he leaves. And you’re not returning to Maryland. I suggest if you want to continue with school, you better find one here in New York. You’ll live at home. No more away. And, no, you’re not going to Charleston, South Carolina, and Rami is not driving you back to school.”
“But, Mom, I plan to leave tomorrow and . . .”
“Tomorrow? The only one leaving tomorrow is Rami.”
“Mom,
please
. I’ve already told them I would go. They’re counting on me as the fourth.”
“I want to know why you suddenly have become so dependent on Rami to drive you around? For God’s sake, Rayna, he may be Syrian, but he is a Muslim. You’re not going to muddy our reputation. I will not have people gossiping behind our backs. Never should we have allowed Eli to talk us into this.”
Not wanting to lie further, Rayna went upstairs to pack for her honeymoon.
* * *
Over dinner that evening, Eli expressed delight in learning from Rami that Rayna had made so many good friends at school. “I think it’s a great idea for Rayna and her girlfriends to have a week together in Charleston before starting her internship.”
“Who are these friends? We don’t know them. I know nothing about where she’ll be staying, who she’ll be staying with. No! That’s my final answer. Eli, what is it with you and your sister? Why are you always doing her bidding, always defending her?” Abe turned back to his daughter. He was not yet finished. “Rayna, you’re not going to Charleston, South Carolina. If you want the beach, come to Deal. Your friends are welcome to stay at our house. We’ll supply food, beds, and a beautiful beach. End of dialogue.”
“But, Dad, that’s so unfair . . .”
“Go spend the week with your grandfather and do something constructive. He’s not well and has been asking for you.”
Rayna’s eyes glossed over. She loved her grandfather. “I’ll go tomorrow and see him. Is he still at Auntie Livia’s in Deal?”
“Yes, he is.” Sarah’s tone bristled with irritation.
* * *
Amid much household uproar, Rami and Rayna left early in the morning and made the hour drive to upscale Deal, New Jersey. Stopping the car in front of the extravagant house of Rayna’s aunt Livia, Rami waited. Rayna walked up the front steps and rang the bell. The live-in maid came to the door, “Nobody home, Missees. Only grandfather.”
“You can go, Rami. My grandfather’s here,” she called out and waved goodbye. They had agreed that Rami would return by three o’clock, which would give them enough time to drive to Kennedy Airport and make their evening flight to Brazil.
“See you at three.” He threw her a kiss and drove off. Rayna had given him suggestions on how to pass the time.
* * *
Isaac was a wise old man. He had a full head of white hair and a devilish grin that sometimes got him into amusing trouble. Rayna and her grandfather sat out on the screened-in porch, sang Syrian songs, and played backgammon. She told him about her year at school and her internship at
InterContinental Weekly
. He cried over the loss of his wife, still not able to accept her death. “It’s been three years. I miss your grandmother more than ever. She was my life. I loved her so much. One day you will understand.”
Rayna reflected on Rami, who often expressed those same words of love. “I do understand. More than you know.” Their interaction switched to one of lively discussion. She knew how much her grandfather always enjoyed debating the Bible. Isaac justified God’s flood and defended Noah for building the ark. Rayna argued for the people and questioned God’s actions to destroy what He had created. The maid served lunch. Rayna helped Isaac eat when his hands became too unsteady. They played more backgammon. The doorbell rang. It was three o’clock. “Jidaw, I have to go. My ride is here.” She gave her grandfather a strong hug and kissed his cheek. “I love you with all my heart. See you next week.”
* * *
Inside JFK International Airport, just before boarding, Rayna swallowed a Dramamine to avoid motion sickness and warned Rami that she would sleep most of the trip. The pair plunked down into their seats, ready for the all-night flight.
* * *
Hours later, early the following morning, they landed at Guarulhos International Airport in São Paulo. From there, Rami and Rayna boarded a domestic flight into Foz do Iguaçu. Two hours later, the small Rio Sul aircraft began its descent, flying directly over the mammoth Itaipu Dam. Leaning across Rayna to view the spectacular structure, Rami gently coaxed her from sleep. “Look. Look.” Rami pointed from the window. “It is the dam.”
Bleary-eyed, she peered down. From the air, the sight of the massive structure straddling the Paraná River was overwhelming.
fifteen
Neither is it allowable to the sun that it should overtake the moon, nor can the night outstrip the day; and all float on in a sphere.
—Surah 36:40
The old colonial style pink-stucco resort, nestled inside the subtropical forest, shimmered against the contrasting backdrop of the glowing afternoon sun. “Ahhh! It looks pink. It looks violet. It looks . . . beautiful. It’s elegant.”
Rami sighed with relief.
Good, so far
.
Emerging from the taxi, he valiantly took Rayna’s hand, helping her out. “Shhhh. Listen.” The tranquil sound of running water welcomed them.
“It’s the waterfalls.” Rayna squeezed Rami’s hand.
Lifting his brow, Rami smiled, paid the driver, rolled their one large piece of luggage through the entranceway, and checked into the Tropical das Cataratas. The spacious lobby glistened with splashes of pastel colors that highlighted the surrounding dark woods. The guest rooms were spread out over a number of wings and Rami and Rayna were happy for the exercise, taking the long walk through the corridors in search of their accommodations.
“There it is!” Rayna pointed, waiting for Rami to open the door. “Ohhhh! Wow!” The deluxe room with hardwood floors, dark wood furniture, accents of vibrant colors, and modern bath with granite countertops met with Rayna’s approval.
Contrary to the gloom Rayna had initially expressed about the trip, this early enthusiasm was more than Rami could have hoped for. Raising his eyes toward the heavens, he silently thanked Allah.
They unpacked, made love, and fell into a sound sleep. It was nighttime when they woke. Their stomachs growled. Rami called the hotel’s concierge. “If you would like to eat out on the terrace, we can seat you in forty-five minutes,” said the man at the other end of the line.
* * *
After showering and dressing, they dined leisurely on Brazilian cuisine. The food was not what they were used to. Keeping to their religious dietary laws took some thought. They settled on a meatless Brazil nut soup, a meatless black bean stew with rice, kale fried in olive oil and garlic, and a green salad. For dessert, they ordered one flan and shared it. Rami had coffee. Rayna drank tea.
Afterward, they strolled the grounds. “Look,” Rayna pointed upward. The moon and stars in all their splendor lit up the night sky. Rami took Rayna’s hand. In the vastness, they tried to grasp the enormity of space. “It’s magnificent. I have never experienced the sky quite like this.” In awe, they breathed in the universe, not wanting their euphoria to end.
A strong breeze soon whipped up, and Rayna felt chilled. They returned to the hotel and browsed in the gift shop. Rayna set her eyes upon a Brazilian carnival doll. Rami observed her admiring it and bought it for her.
* * *
Having breakfast out on the terrace the next morning, the couple were calmed by the sounds and views of the waterfalls, and the serene isolation from the outside world. “Look, Rami. Look at the bright colors and the large bill. It’s a toucan. Have you ever seen one before?”
Rami smiled. “Never.”
* * *
Leaving the resort, the couple caught the bus crossing the Tancredo Neves Bridge connecting Foz do Iguaçu in Brazil with Puerto Iguazú in Argentina. They showed their visas, checked through border patrol, and began the trek into the jungle of Argentina’s Iguazú Falls National Park.
Hand-in-hand, Rami and Rayna walked down the path to where the Iguazú and Paraná rivers converge. Captivated by the two waterways plunging off the plateau, separating the Triple Frontier boundaries of Argentina, Brazil, and Paraguay, the couple stood mesmerized by the breathtaking display. To them, it seemed like an ocean pouring into an abyss.
Along the rim of a two-mile-long crescent-shaped cliff, disconnected cascades plummeted three hundred feet straight down into the gorge below while others sent up clouds of mist and spray, creating a dazzling spectacle of rainbows. Never had Rami and Rayna known such beauty. Everywhere they turned, they were stimulated by the surroundings. “Rami, I’m sorry for giving you such a hard time about coming here. You were right. I’ll never forget this place.”
Rami was happy to see Rayna in such good spirits. He thought of how he had almost canceled the trip when she had so fiercely protested. Now he was glad they had come.
* * *
The next morning, they went for a swim, indulged in a buffet breakfast on the terrace, and returned to the room to gratify their hunger for one another. Afterward, they showered and dressed, then set out to view the five-mile-long Itaipu Dam that harnessed the waters of the westward flowing Paraná River. The colossal concrete structure soared high into the air. Rayna wrapped her arms around Rami’s neck, “This is humongous! Thank you for bringing me here.”
“Allahu akbar,” Rami murmured under his breath.
* * *
Late Monday morning, they set out for Parque das Aves, the bird sanctuary. Rayna got carried away when they came upon two giant otters. “Just look at them, Rami. Look at them playing. In my next life, I want to come back as an otter. They eat, sleep, play, and make love.”
* * *
On Tuesday, they hurried through breakfast and rushed out to make it on time for the Macuco Safari tour. They rode in an open wagon towed behind a jeep, hiked the trail to Macuco Falls, and traveled in a motorboat to the base of the falls. They were not prepared to get so wet.
* * *
The honeymooners saved their last day to venture into the most notorious region of the Triple Frontier, the place where Rami would return to meet Yousef. Not far from their hotel, on Rua Almirante Barroso, they caught the bus marked
Ciudad del Este
. They were warned to prepare for long delays crossing the Paraná River via the Puente de la Amistad.
From a distance, Rami and Rayna caught sight of the decaying iron overpass and the miles-long backup of cars crawling at a snail’s pace. Before reaching the infamous city, they jumped off the bus and walked the rest of the way, realizing they could get across much faster on foot. They zigzagged through the congestion of hundreds of people traipsing across the bridge, pushing carts filled with black-market merchandise or carrying large bags of contraband. Rami and Rayna followed the narrow walkway that ran along the outer edge until they arrived on the other side. The sharp contrast from where they had come unsettled them. Here, in Ciudad del Este, they found dirty streets, blatant crime, drug trafficking, and illicit merchandising—all exposed like bright red flags. Anything in this infernal tax-free pit could be had by haggling. One could buy sex, murder, drugs, weapons, passports, visas, and bogus American dollars.
Tourists from Porto Alegre stopped to talk with Rami and Rayna. They spoke of the billions of dollars in drug money that moved through the city each year. A strangulating knot formed deep inside Rami’s stomach.
A man in a drug-induced stupor stumbled out of a decrepit doorway, shouting incoherently. A bedraggled prostitute came out after him, demanding her money. The panderer pushed her to the ground and stomped on her. Seedy-looking people gathered around, cheering him on. Three teenage boys sat on a corner sniffing cocaine. A young woman stuffed a handful of jewelry into her bag and walked off. She was shot in the face by the vendor.
Frightened for Rayna and conscious of the sleaze and lasciviousness spewing forth from the streets, Rami firmly grasped her hand, “We are getting out of here right now.” Before she could react, he pulled her down the street and onto one of the white buses marked
Línea Urbana Internacional
that would carry them back into Brazil.
* * *
Totally unnerved by the experience, Rami and Rayna were relieved to be safely back in the center of Foz do Iguaçu. Tired and hungry, they wandered into a coffee shop. While sipping on maté, Rami apologized. Rayna intertwined her fingers into his, “I’m afraid for you. I don’t want you coming back here this summer. Promise me you won’t.”
“I am the one who is afraid for you. Today, I put you in danger. How could I have been so stupid?” Rami withdrew into quiet contemplation.
Rayna reached under the table and softly squeezed his knee. “A kiss for your thoughts.”
“Al-Shahid has made major inroads here, trading arms for drugs and carrying out hundreds of executions each year. Also, many suicide bombers are trained in this place. I am only just beginning to understand it all. Rayna, I want no part of this, but I do not know how to free myself from Yousef’s clutches without putting us both in danger.”
Disturbed, they left the coffee shop and returned to their room to pack.
* * *
All week, Rami and Rayna carefully monitored their food, eating no meat, since they had found none to be kosher or halal. On this last evening of their honeymoon, they discovered a Syrian restaurant in the center of Foz do Iguaçu. Seated at a small round table, they noted at the top of the menu printed in Arabic:
All our food conforms to the most stringent rules of halal
.
The couple shared a large maza platter filled with an array of their favorite appetizers. Casually, they ate every morsel until they were stuffed. “I do not know where I can put another bite, but shall we split a dessert?”
“Rami, I think I gained five pounds tonight. Tomorrow is diet time.” She looked down and loosened the tie in the waist of her slacks.
“Uh-oh,” Rami teased, letting out a notch in his belt. Thinking this hilarious, they both burst forth in laughter.
“Mmmm. Yes, dessert. But only if you promise to love me when my tummy is no longer flat.”
“Hmmm. I have been keeping a secret from you. It is your tummy that I love most. If that changes, well . . . I cannot be responsible for my feelings.” Their playfulness had lightened the heaviness of their encounter earlier in the day.
Sharing a custard-rice pudding, they took pleasure in feeding each other from one another’s spoons. Rami sipped Turkish coffee from a demi-tasse cup, and Rayna drank cinnamon-spiced tea from a clear, narrow glass. The week appeared to be ending on a good note when, in an instant and without warning, everything changed. All color drained from Rami’s face. Partially digested food trickled up his esophagus and he choked.
“What’s wrong, Rami? Something just happened. What is it? Are you okay? Are you in pain? What is it Rami?” With a look of fear, she rose from the chair.
“Rayna, sit down. Do not say one word.
Not one word
. Let me handle this.”
“Whaaat?” she lowered herself back into the seat.
He muffled his voice. “Yousef, Abdallah, and Omar just walked in. They are coming toward us.” With his heart racing, Rami grappled to find a way to cope with the advancing threat.
I must protect Rayna. I must not leave her vulnerable to these predators
.
“Well, well, well,” sneered Yousef. “What brings you to this part of the world? We did not expect you until July.”
At first Rami said nothing. He observed Abdallah’s obvious contempt and Omar’s weak smile. “Hello, Omar. It has been a while. How are you?”
Omar responded clumsily, “Fine, Rami, and y . . .”
“Mind if we join you?” Yousef intruded, signaling for Abdallah to pull up three chairs.
“We were just leaving.”
“No, Rami. You’re not going anywhere.” Scrutinizing Rayna, Yousef’s lips curled sardonically. “Tell me, Rami, what brings you here with this stunning lady?”
Rami attempted to leave, but Abdallah moved to block the couple. “So Rami, I didn’t catch the reason for your visit. Business or pleasure?” Yousef baited.
“Pleasure.”
“Oh. Using my money to vacation? How nice of you.”
“Yousef, I have been doing everything you ask of me . . .”
“And I have been generous with you.” Yousef spoke to Rami, but his covetous eyes were all over Rayna.
Tension mounted and Rami’s awareness sharpened. “Yousef, the professor and I have reached a critical point. It seems we shall soon have a breakthrough. I will provide you with an update on Monday.”
“Good. You do that. Now introduce me to your friend.”
Rami kept still. Rayna slowly put down the glass of tea she was holding. Yousef snatched her wrist and held it firmly. “Is this your wife or someone else’s wife?”
Rami’s discomposure magnified.
Yousef has spotted the gold band on Rayna’s finger
.
Yousef maintained his firm grip on Rayna, addressing her personally. “All that I have heard of your beauty does not do you justice. Yet, if you are an American, your loveliness is wasted.”
“Rayna is Syrian,” Omar blurted.
“Ahhhh, Syrian,” Yousef toyed in Arabic. “
R-a-y-n-a
,” he deliberately articulated her name, sounding out each letter. “Where are you from in Syria?”
“Halab,” she answered.
Thank you, Allah
. Rami was grateful she responded with Halab and not Aleppo.
“Are you Muslim?”
Again, Omar protected her. “Yes, she is.”
Yousef’s nostrils flared with lust. “If I were you, Rami, I would have my wife cover herself like a proper Muslim woman, so as not to tempt men such as I.” Still fixated on Rayna, Yousef continued, “I see you know her also, Omar. Tell me, are you as familiar with Rayna as Rami is?”
Impulsively, Rami shoved the table against Yousef. “I have no idea how strongly you want the bacteria in your possession, but it must not be much of a priority since you persist in provoking me. Now, get your sleazy hands off my wife!” He thrust Yousef’s hands off of Rayna and pulled her up. “As I said, we were just leaving before you so rudely interrupted.” Rami grasped Rayna by her waist, discreetly gave a nod of gratitude to Omar, threw some money at the waiter, and led Rayna to the door.
“I’ll go after him, boss,” Abdallah lunged forward with a depraved twist extending across his face. “Let me at him!”
“No, Abdallah. Let him go. You know I have other plans for Rami. I need him to negotiate that arms-for-drugs deal with Carlos el Negro. After that, he’s all yours. Be patient until July when Rami returns. And Abdallah, find a replacement to work with Nolan, someone who will not fail us this time.”