Read The Other Half of My Soul Online
Authors: Bahia Abrams
“I love you, too.” Isaac spoke under his breath so that Eli could not hear, “I want to meet Rami before God takes me. When?”
“Friday. Can you hold on until Friday?”
“I’ll hold on.”
Discreetly, Rayna slipped the band off her finger. In the morning, at work, she would put it back on.
eighteen
If you want to shrink something, you must first allow it to expand. If you want to get rid of something, you must first allow it to flourish. If you want to take something, you must first allow it to be given.
—Lao-tzu
On Friday afternoon, Rayna was submerged in the differences between negligence and malice. She read:
Negligence implies failure to exercise reasonable care. A magazine editor has more time to check a story then a daily newspaper editor has. A television documentary team has more time to verify details than does the producer of the nightly news. Media with an abundance of funds can afford to do more checking. Malice is reckless disregard for the truth. It is lying.
“Hmmm.” As Rayna absorbed the obvious, her cell phone rang.
“Rrawhee, I am here. The train just arrived. I will be there soon. I love you.”
“Me, too.” It had been days since Rayna last saw Rami. She missed him a lot.
* * *
Outside Penn Station, Rami hailed a cab. Through heavy traffic, the driver skillfully maneuvered in and out of lanes. Down Avenue of the Americas, past Greenwich Village, Soho, and Tribeca, the vehicle sometimes lurched forward, sometimes crawled, and sometimes stood still. From the rear-seat windows, Rami gazed up at the tall buildings and gaped at the surroundings. Masses of people attempted to cross at every intersection. Automobile horns blasted at the double-parked vehicles blocking lanes. Stores and restaurants lined the streets in endless succession. All of it had the familiar ring of Aleppo, only on a grander scale.
With his backpack mounted behind him, Rami paid the driver and entered the massive south tower of the World Trade Center.
* * *
“Wow!” He slowly turned, surveying the seven-story glass atrium. He reached for his cell phone. “Hi, rrawhee. I am in the lobby.”
“I’ll be right down.” Coming off the elevator, Rayna caught sight of her husband and rushed toward him. Their hands joined and she guided Rami up to the ninety-first floor.
* * *
After introducing Rami to Marianne, the receptionist at the front desk, Rayna led him back to Kamil’s office. She tapped on the half-opened door. Kamil looked up from his computer. Rayna poked her head in, “Kamil, this is my husband, Rami.”
“Salaam,” Kamil smiled.
“Salaam.”
“Kamil, would it be okay to leave early?”
“Going to see your jidaw?”
“Yes.”
“Have a good weekend. See you Monday.”
“Thanks, Kamil. You and Maddy, also.”
* * *
Leading Rami into her office, Rayna showed him the tutorial she was working on, then handed him Yousef’s profile. “Here’s something to read. Give me ten minutes to finish up.”
“Who is Maddy?”
“Oh . . . Kamil’s American wife. She’s a schoolteacher. They’re expecting their first baby in November. I met her yesterday. She came to have lunch with Kamil and . . .”
Smiling to himself as she spoke, Rami shut the door and planted a long kiss on her mouth. “I could not have stood another moment away from you.”
Rayna’s eyes glistened, “Tonight we stay at a first-class hotel. And tomorrow night. And Sunday night. My parents didn’t want me traveling back and forth from Brooklyn to Manhattan alone at night . . . and for sure not over Shabbat. Little do they know about my easing off of their strict orthodox practices . . . and I’m not about to tell them. They also don’t know you are with me. I’m not about to tell them that, either.”
Looking at her hungrily, Rami kissed her again, “I cannot wait to have you alone.”
“Mmm.” Rayna made some notes, then shut down the computer. “I’m ready.”
Rami had skimmed Yousef’s profile. “This is frightening. Later, I want to spend time studying it. We have a lot to discuss.”
“More than you can imagine. But first the hospital.”
* * *
“Hi, Jidaw,” Rayna gave her grandfather a big hug. The bed was partially raised, and Isaac sat in a semi-reclining position. “You’re looking better than I’ve seen you all week.”
Isaac’s full head of snow-white hair was combed neatly. An impish glow illuminated his eyes. “I’ve been waiting for you to come.”
Rayna grasped Rami’s hand. “Jidaw, meet Rami.”
Isaac squinted. “Rayna, my glasses.” He waited for her to put the spectacles on his face. “Aha! My granddaughter is right. You are handsome.”
“Uh-oh. What else did Rayna tell you?”
“Rayna, I want an hour alone with Rami.”
“Jidaw, just what are you up to? Where did you get this sudden burst of energy?”
Weakly, Isaac motioned with his hand. “Has Rayna told you?”
“Told me what?”
“The secret.”
“You sure are feisty today. I think we can take you home soon.” She fluffed Isaac’s pillow and straightened his blanket.
“Rayna . . . an hour alone with Rami. Please . . . for me.”
Rayna looked at Rami, then back at her grandfather. “Jidaw, Rami and I will be just outside your door for a couple of minutes. We’ll be right back.”
* * *
“What is this all about, Rayna? What am I supposed to say to your grandfather? And the secret? You and I have a commitment. No secrets, remember?”
Rayna did not know what her grandfather had planned, and said so. She suggested to Rami that he do a lot of listening and speak cautiously.
“And the secret?”
“There’s no secret. So much has happened this week. I was planning to tell you everything tonight.
Everything!
Including the three million dollars my grandfather is leaving me.”
“Three million dollars!” Rami could not comprehend having so much money.
“My grandfather is waiting. Go to him.”
“Where will you be for an hour? No . . . an hour is too long. Come back in half an hour.”
“There’s a gift shop in the lobby. I’ll go there and browse, maybe buy something for him.”
The couple returned to the room. “Half an hour, Jidaw. You have Rami for half an hour, then I’ll be back.” She kissed Isaac’s forehead.
“An hour, Rayna. I want one hour with Rami.”
“No, Jidaw. Half an hour.” She quickly exited the room to avoid Isaac’s hassling.
* * *
Seated on a chair beside the bed, Rami waited for Isaac to speak.
“I love my granddaughter very much. The first time I held her, she was only four days old. I was drawn to her angelic beauty. My wife, may she rest in peace, and I . . . we lived just down the block from Rayna. We saw her almost every day.” The old man labored to stay alive. Rami grasped Isaac’s hand and held it. “Water. I need water.” Rami reached for the cup on the tray table and put the straw to Isaac’s lips. Isaac sipped, then pushed it away. “Rami, I don’t have much time. I will be gone before Rayna returns. I sent her out because I don’t want her to see me go. And because you and I must talk.”
“Isaac . . .”
“First listen, please. This is not how it should be, Rayna married to a Muslim. She doesn’t deserve this kind of struggle in her life.”
Rami said nothing.
“From the beginning, Sarah never had the patience or love for Rayna . . . not like she has had for her sons. Abe’s love for Rayna runs very deep. I suspect my daughter is jealous of that. Other than me and Rayna’s grandmother, the only other person Rayna has been close to is Eli. I know my daughter resents that relationship.” Isaac wheezed. Rami lifted Isaac’s head and fumbled for the buzzer. “No. No nurse. We need to talk more.”
“Isaac . . .”
“No. Please. Be patient with me.”
Rami let down Isaac’s head and tried to make him more comfortable.
“Rayna’s determination to go away to school has upset the whole family. And now this happens. You, a Muslim. We’re religious Jews. We marry within our own people, just as Muslims do. Have you any idea what this union is going to do to Rayna’s life? Why did you force her into . . .”
“I did not force her into this marriage.”
“I think you did. I know my granddaughter. She must have expressed some misgivings. Do you know that Rayna’s family will disown her? She will be ostracized from our community, a community that has been a major part of her existence. You have pulled out her roots, snatched Rayna from all she knows. How will you protect her from this? What kind of love made you do such a thing? And what will be your own family’s reaction?”
Remembering Rayna’s advice, Rami was careful with his words. “I love Rayna, and she loves me. I loved her before I ever met her. And I
will
take care of her.”
Isaac rested his head on the pillow. “Rayna’s wealth. Greed is a powerful motivator.”
“Do you think I married Rayna for her money? I knew nothing about any wealth. Rayna never even hinted at it. When we were married in March, I still did not know. It was only after I took her home for Passover and saw the extravagant house that I realized the family’s fortune. I married Rayna because I love her. Money is not my life’s blood. Rayna is.”
“Rayna is so young. You’re both so young. Her life with you will bring enormous hardship for her. I worry about Rayna’s future . . . if your love will survive.” When Rami started to respond, the old man raised his hand and stopped him. “Tell me your innermost thoughts. I want to know the insides of Rami. Then I will have my answer.”
For some unexplained reason, Rami spoke of a recurring dream that haunted him over the years. “I was holding the hand of a beautiful young girl, someone I deeply loved. We were running from somewhere, or to somewhere. I do not know. People all around were being slaughtered . . . massacred. Suddenly, she was swept from me. Frantically, I searched for her, but she was gone. In my sleep, I would call her name, awakening myself . . . and my parents. My nightmares became a family joke. Then, this past January, when Rayna and I made love for the first time . . . I felt peace. No more nightmares.”
A profound silence fell on the teenager and the old man. They were drawn to one another. “Tell me more about you and my granddaughter.”
“Rayna and I have much in common. We have the same values. We like the same foods. We have the same birth date. On August tenth, we will be nineteen . . .”
“Much too young, but . . . these are my last few moments. I must know that Rayna will be in good hands before God takes me from her.”
“I trust Rayna implicitly. We learn from each other, and share honesty and respect. When we make love . . .” Rami caught himself.
“What happens when you and Rayna make love?”
“We feel Allah’s presence all around.”
“Do you think God, your Allah, will protect my granddaughter from the struggles this marriage will bring?”
“I will protect her.”
“Is my granddaughter’s life in your hands or God’s hands?”
“Rayna and I will not deny our love because others decide that we are different and should not be together.”
“People can be cruel. That’s reality. I’m worried about Rayna.”
“I adore Rayna. I will be good to her, take care of her, and love her until the end of time. I give you my word.”
“And al-Shahid? Yousef? Terrorism is a destructive force.”
“It seems Rayna has told you everything. Is there nothing she left out?”
“I must know from you. Why do you think your Allah has dealt you these cards? Can you be smarter than your opponents? Can you play to win?”
“I must win.”
“Eli is the one person who will stand by you both. Don’t . . . ghaaa . . . ghaaa.” Isaac convulsed.
* * *
Returning from the gift shop with a present in hand, Rayna was shaken to see her jidaw’s condition. She rushed to his side and pressed the button for the nurse. Rami cradled Isaac’s head, but it was too late. The old man choked out his last breath and closed his eyes.
“No, Jidaw! Don’t leave me! I need you! Don’t leave me, Jidaw!” Rayna threw herself over her grandfather and wailed. “Come back. Come back. I need you. You can’t leave me. I need you . . .”
Drawing his wife close to his heart, Rami comforted her.
* * *
Rami had been surprised at the marked similarities between Judaic and Islamic burial rites. Isaac’s body had been ritually washed. His corpse was wrapped in a plain white shroud, and he was buried 39 hours later. When the wooden coffin was lowered into the ground, mourners shoveled earth on top. A seven-day grieving period called
sitting shiva
was held in Deal at the home of Sarah’s sister, Livia. The bereaved family received hundreds of visitors who came to pay their respects, bring meals, join in prayers, and reminisce about Isaac.
Rami found it disturbing that such a deep division existed between Muslims and Jews.
We believe in the same God of Abraham and share similar customs and rituals
.
How could such intense hatred occur in a human soul?
Why must religion have such a dark side? Why must it pit man against man?
* * *
According to Isaac’s instructions, the lawyer paid a visit to the family at the end of the shiva week. Gathering the siblings together, he informed them of their father’s iron-clad trust. Angrily, they accused him of being in cahoots with Rayna and manipulating Isaac. The lawyer assured them that these were Isaac’s wishes long before Rayna ever knew anything.
Incensed, Sarah berated her daughter and forbade her to return to Maryland. “If you want to continue your education, it will be done in New York and you will live at home.” She ordered Rayna to spend the rest of the summer in Deal with the Syrian community and not to bring shame upon the family. “Your friendship with that Muslim will cease as of this moment!”
In a rare move, Abe supported his wife and spoke harshly to Rayna, “We will no longer allow your brother Eli to come to your rescue. It won’t work anymore.”
In tears, Rayna ran out of the house and called Rami on her cell phone.
* * *
Rami abruptly left campus, packed his things and, within hours, met Rayna at her parents’ home in Brooklyn. “You do not need to stay here any longer. You are coming back with me.”
“I can’t . . .”
“Yes, you can. I gave my word to Isaac that I would protect you from the ravages of this world, and I intend to do just that.”