The Miting (29 page)

Leah walked through the arch and encountered a room full of bodies in similar condition to those of the girls she’d just seen. Everywhere she looked, young people swayed and drank while they laughed and smoked. None of them seemed coherent, and a few of them were stumbling. She recognized the bowl cuts of Amish young men and could see some of the girls had their hair pinned back, but not severely. Though they wore jeans and T-shirts, their thick-soled black Amish shoes hadn’t been replaced yet. Some were obviously Amish kids who were out to party for the night.

Leah searched for Martha, but the press of people kept her from finding her friend right away. She wandered through the room and then down a short, narrow hallway. At the end of the hall was a tiny, pink-tiled bathroom. The stench of vomit filled the air, and she pulled back as a girl with heavy black eyeliner stumbled out of the bathroom, wiping her mouth on her gray hoodie sleeve. The girl moaned and leaned against a door to the right, pushing it open with the weight of her body. Leah watched as she fell into the room, landing against the edge of a messy bed.

“Get outta here, Anna! My gosh, what is
wrong
with you? Get up! You stink. Go in there and tell Abe to give you some coffee. Go! Whew. You can’t handle any kind of alcohol, you Amish geek.”

Leah could see a pair of hands tugging at the girl, who she supposed was Anna, and she thought she recognized the voice now cursing at the nearly passed-out teen. Could that be Martha?

Leah walked toward the bedroom and peered in. There was her friend trying to make Anna stand on her own two feet.

Leah was shocked, not only by Martha’s pale and puffy face, but at the sight of her bulging belly! Martha was obviously pregnant and not long from delivering her baby. She hadn’t heard a word of this news from any of the former Amish—or
Englishers
, for that matter—in the months since Martha had left home.

The anger coming from Martha was as fierce as the music pounding Leah’s brain. “Martha!” Her friend did not hear her above the din, and Leah called several times before Martha finally turned her way.

“Leah!” Martha squealed. She let the drunken girl fall back onto the bed and ran to hug her. “You came! I was hoping you got the word I wanted to see you. Here, help me get this girl out of here, and then we can close the door and talk.”

Leah was too shaken to do anything but nod. The two managed to push Anna up and onto her feet. They half dragged her into the living room and plopped her down in a beat-up recliner in the corner. Leah was a little concerned about Martha doing so much heavy lifting at her late stage of pregnancy.

Martha motioned Leah back to the hallway and then led the way into the disheveled bedroom. Coats of every kind were flung on the bed, but Martha unceremoniously swept them onto the floor. She lay down on the bed, her legs splayed out uncomfortably before her. She patted the bed for Leah to sit. “I bet you’re shocked, huh?” she laughed. She rubbed her stomach and giggled.

“I am a little. I had heard about you living with Abe, but—”

“Gossip? Yeah. I just bet I was talked about by all the old women and the girls at the last quilting, right?” Martha scowled.

Leah shook her head. “I wouldn’t know. I’ve been gone a while now.”

“I heard that, but I could hardly believe it. Why’d you go?”

Leah pulled her feet up under her and told Martha her story.

Martha snorted. “I can’t believe you want to live there! They have a reputation of being strict. Why go from the frying pan into the fire, Leah?”

“It isn’t like that at all. I have as much freedom as I need, and I’m working to get my GED. I’m also practicing to get my driver’s license, and I have some work. It’s not bad.”

Martha regarded her friend skeptically, shaking her head. “Too much religion for me.”

“They do like us to go to church, but you know I’m born again, so I like going to church anyway.”

Leah’s enthusiasm seemed naive and childish even to her own ears as loud music and the noise of the drunken partygoers filtered through the shut door. Martha cackled and adjusted herself into a more comfortable position. “Good for you, but I like the life I have here.”

Leah looked at her. “When’s your baby due?”

“Two months, they say. I don’t know. Seems like he might come at any time.” She nodded toward the door. “Abe’s in seventh heaven now that we know it’s a boy.”

“Are you—do you—have the right things for the baby?”

Martha shrugged. “We’ll be ready, I guess. I have a lot of stuff I’ve been buying at garage sales, and there’s this place called Catholic Charities where we can get vouchers to buy stuff, too.” She hung her head. “I’m trying to find a job, though. Abe thinks he might get laid off from the factory. It makes him grumpy sometimes. He worries too much.”

She glanced toward Leah. “You hear of anything coming open anywhere? I was thinking of waitressing or maybe cleaning, fast food, whatever. I can do just about anything.”

“No. I’m sorry. I don’t know of anything. Are you sure you’d feel like working, though?”

“Sure.”

Leah could not imagine being in Martha’s shoes. She was really worried about her, but it was none of her business, so she changed the subject.

“You should have Abe bring you over sometime. I have my own apartment—almost my own. I share it with another former Amish girl. She’s really nice.”

Martha seemed suddenly depressed. “Maybe I will.” Martha picked at some fuzz on her bedspread and Leah grew uncomfortable when she stopped talking altogether.

Finally, Leah stood and gave Martha a tight hug. “I should get going. Is there a phone I can use to call someone to come pick me up? It’s earlier than I’d arranged.”

“Here. I got my phone fixed.” She leaned to her right side and pulled the red cell phone out of her pocket. It was the one she’d shown Leah months ago, the day of the summer frolic, when she’d told about her stepbrother Abner. It seemed a long time ago now, and while Leah felt a longing for the simple days that had existed for her back then, she remembered none of those days had been simple or safe for Martha.

She glanced at Martha’s sad eyes and wished she could make everything right for her.

Leah sighed, took the phone, and punched in the Schrocks’ number, but then she snapped the phone shut. What was she doing? She couldn’t call the Schrocks—they were gone for the evening, and she’d have to wait another two hours, at least, for Hannah and her boyfriend to be ready to pick her up after their movie. How would she get home? Leah surely didn’t want to stay here any longer.

“What’s the matter?” asked Martha as she handed the phone back.

“I forgot, the Schrocks aren’t home, and my ride won’t be picking me up until after eleven.”

Martha laboriously pulled herself from the bed and motioned for her to follow. “What’s wrong with staying until eleven?”

Leah tried not to sigh, but her heart grew heavy thinking about being in this place any longer. It was sad seeing her friend this way, and Leah was caught off guard by the noise and drinking. The whole situation made her anxious to leave.

Martha grinned. “Oh, I get it. Not your favorite kind of party, eh? I’ll get Abe to drive you back.”

Leah hesitated as she imagined the shape Abe might be in. Martha saw her concern and laughed again. “Don’t worry. He takes turns staying sober with the other guys so he can drive everybody home. He’s dry as a haymow tonight.”

They pressed their way back through the crowd until Martha found Abe in the corner of the living room, shouting about a movie he and Martha had watched the night before. The thud of the bass made Leah’s head pound, and a time or two, she felt her heart beating in time with the music. A strange, lonely wave rolled over her. Though she was surrounded by former Amish kids just like her, she did not fit in. Would there ever be a place in the world for her again?

Martha balanced her swollen body on the arm of the chair Abe was sitting in and leaned over to rest her head against his. She looked tired.

The smoke that fills this room can’t be good for the baby.
Then Leah was shocked to see Martha take a drag from Abe’s burning cigarette. On a closer look, she realized the smoking white stick wasn’t just a normal cigarette. She frowned. Leah would have never guessed Martha would put her own child at risk by smoking pot.

Martha caught her disapproving look and grinned. She nudged Abe and said in a loud voice, “My goody-two-shoes friend here is not happy with us, Abe.”

Abe glanced up for the first time and nodded dully to Leah. He went back to his conversation, but Martha wasn’t through needling her friend. She grabbed the arm of one of the girls swaying nearby and yelled, “This is my
Christian
friend. Her name’s Leah. She doesn’t approve of our party, ladies.”

One of the girls turned her head and stared with an angry scowl. “What’s she doing here then?” she asked sharply.

Martha giggled. “She thought she was coming to a singing.”

The gang of girls howled and giggled as they broke out singing a song from the old hymnal. They linked arms with Martha, substituting silly and filthy words for the old Amish ones. They burst into new fits of giggles.

Leah’s face grew warm from embarrassment and anger. Though she didn’t want to be a part of the Amish anymore, she didn’t like the way these girls were making
sputz
of the sacred hymns they had so often sung together on Sunday nights. Leah retreated to a chair in the corner and sat with her head down.
Why did I come here?

One of Abe’s friends stumbled over to squeeze into the chair with her. She tried to push him off, but he perched precariously on the arm, waving his cigarette around her face. His breath was as foul with alcohol as everyone else’s in the room, and his aftershave was strong and cloying. She gagged at the sickening combination of odors. Her head continued to pound with the music.

“You friends of Abe an’ Martha?” the man slurred. He spit on her hand as he talked.

“
Ja
.” She wiped the moisture from the back of her hand.

“Me, too. I come from Hartville way. You from around here?”

“Yes.”

He stopped talking but continued to stare. Then his eyes traveled up and down her body, and Leah cowered further into the chair, trying to ignore him.

“You want a
real
man to take you home—show you a good night?” he blurted out suddenly.

Leah glared sharply at the man. His leering smile and drunken eyes sickened her. She shook her head and tried to stand up, but he grabbed at her clothes and wrestled her back to the chair. He tried to slide under her just as she lost her balance and fell into the seat. Leah fought to jump up and away from his smelly body. She was amazed a person so drunk could still be this strong. He would not let her stand. Panic flew through her at his touch, and she struggled harder. “Stop! Please! I have to go home—let me up!”

Leah looked around for help, but Martha was still joking and singing with her friends, and no one else seemed to realize what was happening. She continued to fight his groping until finally she was able to wiggle away from the man’s sweaty grip.

She fell to the floor and hurriedly crawled away from his grasp. He leaned back in the chair, hooting and jeering at her. “What a
dumbkopf
,” he sneered. “Go on home, you ugly
Englisher.
” He waved Leah off and began to chuckle at nothing.

Leah stood on trembling legs as she forced her way through the crowd of partiers to Martha.

“Martha, I’d like to go home
now.
Could you ask Abe again?” Leah had to yell for her to hear.

Martha glanced her way, stopping her swaying as she regarded Leah’s frantic expression. She turned to Abe and asked him to go get the car to take Leah back to her Christian family. She emphasized the word
Christian
again with a smirk.

One of the young people standing near Martha turned and asked Leah what she was bothering with religion for. “You got out, right? So why go back to all those rules?” The girl slurred her speech and leaned toward her, sloshing beer on Leah’s sleeve. Now she reeked of alcohol, too.

Leah was past talking about her Christianity. All she could think about was getting out of the smelly room and back to her peaceful apartment. Martha wasn’t in any condition to argue with or reason with, either. In her heart, Leah knew Jesus made all the difference in her life but saying that now seemed like a waste of breath. Most of the former Amish at this party wouldn’t care or listen. It hit her that they were trying everything else but God to fill the holes in their hearts.

Tears of compassion flooded her eyes, and Martha noted them. Something melted in her. She reached out, grabbed Leah, and hugged her close. “I’m sorry.”

“Martha, I really want to go,
please
,” Leah whispered. She couldn’t understand how Martha could take this noise and chaos night after night, especially with a baby on the way.

Martha looked around and saw Abe by the door. She gave Leah another hug and pushed her through the crowd. Leah took one more look at Martha.

“I’ll be praying for you, Martha. Please let me know if you need anything and call when the baby is born. Okay?”

Martha nodded, staggering back to her friends and her party life, giggling.

The deep notes thumped through the air and wrapped around Leah as she descended the shaky stairs. Abe was waiting in the truck and sighed loudly when she climbed in.

“Sorry to take you away from the party, Abe.”

He nodded as he tuned his radio to a loud station.
So much for trying to talk.

She stared out the window and watched the quiet houses as they passed by in the night. Leah was unsettled and lonely. The face of Jacob Yoder came to mind, his smile something she sorely missed. She was disconnected out here in this
Englisher
world. Sometimes, it was very tempting to give up and go back. If only she could do both: live under grace and be with her family and community. There was no way she could go back on the Lord, but was there still hope the bishop would give in about her going against the
Ordnung
?