The Mason List (9 page)

I didn’t
see my family any different than the others.  Yet, Jess saw me as the opposite;
I was his savior when in fact, his family was ours.  The idea required more
thought at a later time when I wasn’t stranded in a snowstorm. 

I watched
the flames jump around in the metal bin until my sleepy head fell against
Jess's shoulder.  My nose tucked close to his hair that still smelled like
soap, despite the smoke in the tiny room.  In the moment, I was cold but felt
safe next to him.  Sometimes, I just pretended his last name wasn’t Mason.

 “
Jess!
”
I screamed, jerking awake.  A log exploded in the fire, causing it to shift and
knock over the metal bin.  He threw the blanket off as the flames spread up the
fabric.

“Come
on!” Jess grabbed my hand and pulled me up.  “We gotta get to the hatch!”  The
room filled with smoke and the old boards soaked up the flames.  “Don’t let go
of my hand.  I’m gonna slide around the outside wall.”

I followed
Jess blindly as we scooted through the haze to the exit.  Something exploded,
sending a wave of flames in our direction.  I doubled over coughing as the heat
scorched my face.  Jess pushed me through the door and I hit the landing
platform on my stomach.  I rolled over and screamed as Jess struggled to get
through the hatch with his coat sleeve on fire.

“
Go!”
Jess
pleaded as he beat his glowing arm against the landing floor.  “I’ll be right
behind you!” 

“No…I’m
not going!”

“
Now!
” 
Jess shoved me off toward the ladder.

I slipped
down the steps, desperately watching for Jess.  At that angle, I couldn’t see
the top of the platform.  Jumping the last ten feet, I fell backward into a
drift.  The whole house burned bright in the cold air with Jess still on the
platform.  I pulled myself out of the snow and climbed back up the steps. 
Orange glowing boards fell all around me.  Something struck the back of my
head, knocking me down in the snow.  The pain radiated down my spine then
everything went black.

My body
moved slowly through the snow.  Ice caked around the waistband of my jeans. 
Opening my eyes, the flames burned hot in the distance.  It hurt to move my
head.  Jess struggled to take another step; his hands pulling under my arm
pits, dragging me away from the tree house. 

“Don’t,
you’re hurt,” I muttered.

“Nah…just
a little.”  His sweet face gritted up in pain.  “Let’s…g…get further a…away.”

Everything
went out of focus.  For a moment, I didn't see anything but darkness.  Feeling
around my head, I located the knot just on the backside.  I looked back up at
Jess, smelling the scorched flesh.  The image of his burning body stayed seared
in my mind.  Turning to the side, I saw something awful.

Jess made
it a few more steps before sinking down in the snow.  Crawling up beside him, I
took a good look at his arm.  My stomach lurched seeing the bloody, oozy mess
mixed with melted fabric.  I stared back into his sad, blue eyes.

“Maybe we
should put snow on it.”

“Ok,” he
mumbled.

I patted
a handful of white fluff into the charred arm.  I was afraid to push too hard. 
What if I knocked off part of his skin?  The idea caused bile to form in the
back of my throat.  Taking another clump, I added a new layer, seeing the blood
darken the ice.  “Feel any better?”

“Yeah.” 
He half-smiled as a tear trickled out of his eye.  The water froze on his
cheek.  My chest hurt, seeing him cringe in pain each time I touched his arm. 
I stopped packing the burn with snow.  Jess needed a doctor.

“I don’t
know what else to do.”

“It’s almost
numb now,” he muttered.  “It shouldn’t be long now.  They’ll see the fire and
come lookin’.”

Scooting
closer to his side, I wrapped my arms around his shaking body.  We clung
together in the snow, waiting to be rescued.  The smell of his burned skin lingered
in the air. 

It wasn’t
long before two beams of light headed in our direction.  The big
four-wheel-drive truck barely stopped before both of our fathers came running
toward us out on the meadow.

The burns
and the head injury landed us both in the hospital.  Tomorrow, Jess would see a
specialist in Dallas.  They held me overnight for observation for a
concussion.  Dr. Mason arranged for us to share a room in side-by-side beds. 
Once again, I slept in the Arlis hospital, but this time as a patient.

Tonight
scared me.  It scared me in ways I didn’t want to think about as I watched my
friend stare up at the ceiling.  I knew he was still in pain. 

“I’m
really sorry,” he whispered softly. 

“It’s
ok.”

“No, it’s
not.  I do stupid stuff sometimes.  I get caught up in the moment and I…I know
we joke ‘round but you’re my best friend.”  The blue eyes glistened in the dim
room as he rolled over to face me.  “You wouldn’t wake up after you got hit.  I
kept shakin’ you and you just laid there.  The boards were fallin’
everywhere…and I was scared.  I don’t know what I’d do if somethin’ happened to
you.”

An odd
pain stabbed me in the chest.  I sucked in a deep breath.  Every time I closed
my eyes, I pictured his body covered in fire.  I pictured the orange flames
eating up his skin.  I pictured a life without Jess.  The image hurt.  It hurt
deep inside my chest in a way nothing else could reach me. 

“I would
cry,” I whispered. 

“What?”
His voice cracked like it often did these days.

“I would
cry for you, Jess.”

Chapter 15

Today,
10:52 p.m.

The
hospital still has the same wallpaper.  I notice this as I open my eyes.  The
dim moonlight illuminates a man sitting in the chair; his hand resting across a
knee.

“Dad?”

“Hey.” 

Wiggling
my hand, I move it free of the restraints.  I lift it up to see ugly red marks
across the blue stars inked into the skin on my wrist.  Bruises speckle the
rest of my arm, disappearing under my sleeve.  I hurt in every possible way a
body could hurt.  I hurt from my skin to my soul.  

“What
time is it?”

“A little
before eleven.”

“What’s
happening?  I want the truth.”

“You need
to get cleaned up and we can talk.”  His face constricts on the words.

“Stop
it.” 

“Alex,
you broke the stained glass window in the chapel with a plant.  You need to
take it easy.  I know you’re upset.”

“
Upset?
 
You think I’m
upset?
  You of all people should understand I’m not just
upset!
”
Panic grips my skin.  I can’t breathe.  Tucking my knees close, I grab on
tight.

“Pumpkin,
it will be ok.”

“Stop
lying to me.”

His rubs
his tired eyes.  “I’m not lying.  I just don’t have an answer, so it’s the only
thing I know to say.”

“So you
don’t know?”

“No,” he
mutters.  My father stands up from the chair.  He sits down next to me on the
bed, pulling me against his shoulder.  “I would tell you if I did.  I won’t
keep it from you.”

“Promise?” 
Two tears slip down my cheeks upon hearing that word.  Those two syllables
represent something powerful in my world, the very one that spins in a perilous
orbit.

“I
promise, Pumpkin.”

Chapter 16

When
I was fourteen…

Arlis. 
Not
big enough to spit on
, according to those passing through the
hole-in-the-wall Texas town.  It didn’t take long for me to know exactly what
Jess meant when I arrived at Sprayberry.  Arlis was not a wealthy place, which
made the Masons stand out as local royalty among the gossipmongers and
coat-tailers.

My
involvement with the family became fodder of many dinner table discussions. 
The snippets of our legendary scandal caught my ear through the years. 
How’d
those con-artist Tanners wiggle their way in with the Masons?  You know they
pay for everything.  Bought the dad another new truck just last year.

For Jess
and me, those wild days at Sprayberry made the rest disappear into oblivion.  A
bubble built by children destined to burst, but we lived every moment happy and
together.  That worked until this summer.  In a few weeks, high school would
start, bringing the full world of Arlis right to my doorstep.  It was an
understatement to say I was worried.  Those thoughts plagued my subconscious as
I sat sketching poolside at the Masons.  

“When are
you getting your ass in the pool?” Natalie demanded from the cool, blue water. 
I looked up at my only other friend besides Jess.  She’d spent the last hour
floating around on a reclining raft in his pool while I sketched in my notepad.

“Um,
maybe later.  I want to finish this and then I’ll jump in before we head
back.” 

“Good
luck, Nat.  She’s not gettin’ in unless you push her.”

Hearing
his deep voice from the white lounge chair, I tilted my eyes up long enough for
a nonverbal,
shut up!
  Jess winked back. 

“Jerk,” I
mouthed at him. 

I met
Natalie when she moved to town during seventh grade.  The school board members,
who graduated high school with Moses, thought junior high students still needed
a jungle gym.  This just drove some kids to hang out behind the bus barn
smoking whatever they could rustle up, and the rest to stand around with petty
stares of social-ranking popularity. 

One lunch
period, while trying to escape the courtyard of fake smiles, I found a girl
kicking the crap out of the Dr Pepper machine with her laced up Dr. Martens. 
She wore a black ruffled skirt and a tight, Nine Inch Nails t-shirt.  As I
watched the strange girl, she turned and gave me a twisted smile that screamed,
back the hell up!
 

That was
the day I met Natalie, the most unique person I’d ever seen.  She came to Arlis
kicking and screaming louder than me with a family-forced move, courtesy of her
grandfather’s dementia.  I understood and accepted the fellow outsider to this
place.  Despise plus despise equaled a match made in despicable heaven.

Hearing a
splash, I glanced up again over my paper.  Jess slipped in the deep end and
surfaced close to Natalie.  He slicked the dark hair back off his forehead. 
Swimming up to the raft, he grinned close to her face.  “You wanna play
volleyball?”

Seeing
Natalie’s hateful snarl, I chuckled to myself.  Those two basically tolerated
each other because of me.  I don’t think Jess disliked Natalie; he just didn’t
understand her harsh personality or love of black clothing.  On the other hand
Natalie, saw Jess as the spoiled rich kid.

Jess
assembled the net across a corner section of the pool.  Natalie reluctantly
climbed off the raft to play with him.  Sitting under the large umbrella
covered table, I focused again on my sketch, adding a few more lines of shadows
around the windows.  I had to admit, the architecture of Mason Manor was very
interesting to reconstruct on paper.  Jess
hated
the nickname I gave the
house.  I used it as much as possible just to grate on his nerves. 

“Alexandra,
would you care for some lemonade?”  I looked up to see Mrs. Mason standing over
me.  Her drawn out words practically turned the last one into four. 

“Yes,
ma’am.”

She
handed over a glass with her perfectly manicured fingers.  Mrs. Mason’s eyes
paused briefly on my Rangers baseball cap.  I thought the blue canvas looked
nice with my red braids sticking out on each side.  She apparently thought
otherwise.

“What are
you working on, dear?” she smiled, the sun reflecting off her glossed lips.

“Um, some
drawings.” I noted her carefully selected outfit.  The crisp white pants and
gold dress sandals complemented the yellow sleeveless sweater top. 

“Do you
mind if I have a look?” Reluctantly, I handed over the paper.  I didn’t like
someone seeing my work.  Even if it was just a building, the picture was a
little part of the person I was inside.  Mrs. Mason scanned over the drawing.
“Very nice, Alexandra.”

“Hey Al,
show her your book.  She’s really good.” 

Thanks,
I glared at him.

Taking a
deep breath, I opened my backpack.  Thanks to Jess and his big mouth, I really
didn’t have a choice except show her my drawing pad.  A flush of nausea shot in
my stomach mixed with the pretty lemonade.

Mrs.
Mason thumbed through the pictures of animals and buildings and flowers from
the meadow.  She paused on the sketch of Jess perched on Clive’s saddle.  The
entire picture was gray and white pencil except a few highlighted points.  I
added bright blue watercolor to Jess's eyes and the blue bonnets in the
background. 

“Your
sketches are very good, Alexandra.  Did you ever take lessons?”

“No,
ma’am.  Not formal ones.”  Feeling the judgment, I absently chewed on my bottom
lip. 

“Hmmm, I
see.  Well, carry on, dear.”  Handing back the sketch pad, she walked toward
the house.  “Jessup, you really should put on sunscreen.”

“Yes,
ma’am.” Jess agreed to her motherly request even though he never burned.  The
sun just turned his skin into dark caramel.

Jess and
Natalie climbed out of the pool to get some lemonade.  They each took one of
the decorative poolside cups, accented with a lemon wedge in the top corner. 

“Stop
dripping all over my stuff!”  I spat at Jess, pulling my sketch book away.

“Maybe you
should just get in the pool,” he grinned, taunting me.  Bending down, he
scooped me up from the chair.  I kicked my feet in every direction and tried to
elbow his chest.  Walking over to the edge of the pool, his arms held me in a
vice grip, making my clothes wet. 

“Don’t
you dare!”

“What’d
ya think, Nat?”

Natalie
just nodded her dyed black head in agreement. 

“What? 
You two are agreeing on things together now!” 

I twisted
around trying to get free, but Jess gripped harder into my skin.  He’d spent the
entire summer training with the high school football team.  I couldn’t beat him
anymore.  His toned up body got stronger every day.

“Ok,
let’s do this,” his voice cracked with a laugh. “One, two… and three!” 

I flew in
the air and then landed in the cold, blue water.  Thrashing around, panic
climbed from my chest into my throat.  My toes fought against the cement bottom
until I stood upright in the shallow end.

“You
asshole!”  I surfaced, coughing up water.  “I hate both of you!” 

Jess
landed with a cannonball next to me, sending another splash over my head.  I
wiped the spray from my eyes. “I’ll get you back.  You better watch it.”

He
laughed, getting close to my face. “What’re you gonna do ’bout it.”

“Take you
down.”

“
Really.
”

“
Yes
,”
I taunted right back into his blue eyes.

“Like
this?”

I
screamed as he dunked me under the water and pulled me back out again.  I got
in a few good punches to his side.  He just laughed in my ear as he carried me
to the side of the pool.  Jess dumped me next to Natalie on the cement.

“You
really should wear a suit.  I can see through your shirt.”

“Then
stop looking,
jerk!
”

Crossing
my arms over my tank top, I turned to Natalie.  She seemed bored, flicking her
purple toes in the water.

“We still
on for tonight?”  Jess climbed up next to us on the side of the pool.  “I
lifted the keys this mornin’ to the Jeep.”

“You want
to come with us?”  I invited Natalie knowing she would say no.

“Where
are you going?”

“We’re
sneakin’ out drivin’ tonight,” he said in that syrupy voice.  “Maybe out toward
Nickel Creek.”

“That’s
lame.”

Ignoring
her stupid comment, he turned a sweet smile over to me.  “I’ll be over ‘round
eleven-thirty.  Your dad should be asleep then, right?”

“Yeah, I
think so.”  My stomach did a little flip flop at the prospect of sneaking out
of the house.  However, it was just too tempting not to go driving with Jess.

I heard
the phone ring after dinner.  My father answered, and I knew immediately from
the tone of his voice, he was discussing something with Mrs. Mason.  My body
tensed up, hearing the phone click back in the cradle.

“Hey
Pumpkin?  You in the kitchen?” My father yelled from the living room.  I’d just
finished putting away the dishes in the cabinet.

“Yeah,” I
said back a little hesitant.

He leaned
against the door jam. “I just had an interesting discussion with Mrs. Mason.”  

“Um, you
did?”

“So I
guess she looked at some of your sketches this afternoon.” 

I didn’t
see that one coming.  I knew something flashed on her face as she looked
through the pictures.  Anger festered under my skin.

“Well,
Mrs. Mason talked to a friend over in Fort Worth and found some fancy
instructor who’d like to see some copies of your work.   If he finds you
promising, her words,” he chuckled, “this instructor would like you to come
over two Saturdays a month to work one-on-one.”

You
had to be kidding me!
 
Her interceding involvement in our life would never stop.  I’m sure this
fancy
instructor, who only took a student based on an audition, would be extremely
expensive.

“Isn’t that
exciting?”  He smiled while the silent screams stayed inside my body

 “No, I
don’t think it’s a good idea.” 

“Are you
sure?” His smile fell just a little.  “If you’re worried about the money…Mrs.
Mason said she’d handle the cost.” 

Of
course she would
. 
I shook my head, knowing this couldn’t happen.  We had to draw the line
somewhere. 

“Dad, I
don’t want them paying for it.”

“But I
want you have these kinds of opportunities.  You’re good, Pumpkin.  I’m proud
of you.” 

He always
wanted the best for me and I didn’t want to crush my father.  A snarl formed in
my throat.  He was going to guilt me into letting the Masons pay for it. 
Fine!

“Ok, I’ll
do it,” I muttered.  Taking a deep breath, I let it out slowly.  I wished I
felt differently, but I just couldn’t.

After
finishing in the kitchen, I went back to my room to wait for Jess.  I pulled
out my list, penciling in the new entry.  Most of the columns were full on the
front side.  The large, blank backside waited for more of the inevitable
charity that came from the family.  I chewed on my bottom lip as I absorbed the
magnitude of the debt.  Shaking my head, I tucked the paper away in the
drawer.  No one had ever seen the list.  I’m not sure how I would explain the
columns of items if anyone every stumbled across the hidden paper.

Climbing
under the covers, I pulled Carrot up next to my face.  A deep purr vibrated
through her entire orange body.  She was my favorite present from that crazy
boy.  I thought about Jess coming by later.  This wasn’t the first time we
snuck out after dark.  Sometimes, we took the four-wheeler to his thinking spot
on the meadow.