The Irresistible Bundle (115 page)

GRADUATE

~ DESIRAE ~

End of Freshman Year, College

"Stop pouting" Carina Lobos, best friend and roommate extraordinaire, narrows her dark brown eyes at me. "You're family now Desirae. There's nothing more to say."

I scowl at my curvaceous bestie. She doesn't budge as we glare at each other. Carina's mother, Yolanda, insists that I attend every family function the Lobos family has. Although I love Carina like a sister I don't want
everyone
in the family to think of me like that.

Nope... I gladly succumb to Yolanda and Ignacio fussing over me like an adopted child but refuse to allow Carina's stepbrother, Diego, to look at me in that way. I sigh with exasperation as Carina packs my stuff too. The woman isn't fucking taking the hint!

"Diego doesn't even want me there" I stubbornly insist. I avoid Diego at all costs. The bastard is too handsome and too smart for his own good.

"He's graduating Cum Laude and included a ticket for you to attend his graduation. END OF DISCUSSION!" Her fiery Latina attitude bursts forth; apparently not understanding my reticence.

"Fine" I grumble as she rifles through the closet. "What are you wearing?"

Carina's shoulders slump with relief as she grabs the red dress off her twin bed. "I'm wearing this" she states. I grab the smooth rayon-material dress and sigh with appreciation as we eye the draped cuff dress. It's comfortable yet beautifully understated.

"Nothing loud or outrageous" She shrugs. "It goes to my knees and covers all my girly parts."

"So you mean the screaming red and off the shoulder look won't garner you any attention" I snicker. "Fuck me! Another Donna Karan! Really?!"

"Valentino got it for me" Carina smiles fondly at the dress. "The man has impeccable taste."

"That he does" I giggle as her face flushes brightly. Erotic memories of Carina with her men, Valentino and Marco, stoke my inner flames. There's nothing better than watching the three of them going at each other. My best friend is one lucky bitch. Not only did she land the coveted Club 69 owner, Valentino DeLuca, but she also got his business partner and best friend, Marco Soriano.

"Wear this" Carina thrusts a black cashmere dress at me. "No zippers or buttons to worry about. You'll fit beautifully in it."

"Another gift" I arch my brows causing her to laugh. She came from California with several beautiful pieces but nothing like the dresses she's pulling out now.

"Hey, you benefit as much as I do. I know you have great clothes but let's go sporting Donna Karan all the way." She winks as we choose matching shoes and accessories for the dresses.

"You're lucky I'm done with finals" I grumble again as she finishes packing our stuff. Carina grunts in response but says nothing more. It's the taboo subject between us. She's seen and experienced the cold indifference from my family and feels like it's her mission in life to remind her best friend what a real family is like.

"Let's go" Carina drapes her arm over my shoulder before exiting the dorm.

~

"He better not have any more obscene pictures" Carina growls as we exit the plane. I cover my mouth but not before she hears the laugh escape my lips.

"That was priceless" I wheeze as she tries to refrain from howling with laughter too. I wouldn't put it past Diego to brazenly hold out another embarrassing picture of his gorgeous sister so that every person exiting the plane will see it.

"Don't encourage him" Carina whines as she warily looks around. Diego easily stands out in a crowd with his wavy black hair, sparkling chocolate eyes, and tall stature. Have I already mentioned he's delicious?

"Yes ma'am" I salute looking out for Diego too, but for different reasons. Our eyes sweep across the sea of people before stopping at the smirking hunk. Diego stands there with a sign in his hand that reads:

Lost a set of double D's

"Is that the best he's got" I splutter, unimpressed with his sign. I guiltily glance between my breasts and Carina's; we each have a set of D-cups that both men and women openly appreciate; 100% real too. Carina stalks toward her brother while I casually saunter over. No sense in rushing over to hear his nonsense.

"Hello ladies" Diego greets. His eyes lock with mine instantly heating my core. I let my eyes travel down his scrumptious body. Tall, fit, and tanned. My legs ache with the desire to wrap themselves around his waist.

"Diego" we simultaneously reply; although Carina's sounds more like a growl while mine sounds snarky.

"Your chariot awaits" he proclaims as he leads the way to the baggage claim area. Carina rolls her eyes before hooking her arm into the crook of his. Diego offers his other arm to me.

I waggle a finger at him. "You're just trying to look like some stud muffin with two beautiful women draped all over you" I huff. "I'll pass, thank you very much!"

"Ah, how I've missed you and that smart mouth Des" He teases. He winks at me chuckling making my freckles disappear beneath my heated blush. Diego loves tormenting us. While everyone else adores and worships us, like they rightly should; Diego feels like it's his job to ensure our heads don't get too big.

"You don't know the half of what I can do with it" I lick my bottom lip smiling as his eyes follow my tongue. I know I get to Mr. Always-so-fucking-prim-and-proper. We talk on the phone all the time, of course with Carina right there. I've seen him during Christmas and Spring breaks. We hang out, amicably. No matter how flagrantly I flirt, or playfully tempt him, Diego never caves.

There's a line in the sand drawn now that I'm considered family... Because the Lobos family really has welcomed me with open arms; I'm included for all holidays, vacations, and gatherings. If Carina leaves campus for a family function, then it's a given that I'm going too.

No one asks about my home life. No one questions why my parents don't give a shit. The Lobos family loves me unconditionally and it scares the shit out of me. But I don't dwell on the possibilities of them finding out. I focus on playing the best dutiful adopted daughter and best friend praying that everything else will fall into place.

"Des" Carina's voice snaps me back to the here and now. "You know Diego can't handle all your awesomeness so stop teasing him."

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Diego huffs. He leads us out of the airport and to an awaiting SUV with his best friend, Griffin, behind the steering wheel.

"Hey hot stuff" Griffin calls from the car. He motions us over ignoring airport security who's yelling at him to move along. We load our bags into the back before crawling in. Carina shoves Diego to the front seat not allowing him to consider sitting with us in the back.

"It's good to see you sugar" I purr already causing trouble. Griffin is Diego's best friend and he considers both me and Carina as hands-off making it so fun to fuck around with him. There's nothing better than getting him all hot and bothered before he takes off running in the opposite direction.

"Behave" Diego growls from the front seat. My lip curls automatically, loving his caveman reaction. Diego doesn't take well to me flirting with his friends but oh-fucking-well. He won't give into my advances so I have no reason to stay away from his friends. Guys may say bros before hoes but they're quick to pull their dicks out for an easy nut.

"So how long is this thing going to last?" Carina quickly changes the subject. She knows exactly what to do and say to veer us in a different direction.

"A couple of hours" Griffin shrugs. "This isn't like your high school graduation. There are thousands of graduates and plenty of long-winded big wigs who love to hear themselves talk."

"Shit" Carina mutters making me laugh. At least I wasn't the only one dreading this. We're here to support the guys but it doesn't mean we won't grumble about it.

"It's so good to have you two back" Diego chuckles from the front seat.

"Did you tell them yet?" Griffin squirms with excitement like some damn little kid.

"Tell us what?" I demand. I don't do surprises. The last time I'd been surprised it fucked up my whole life. "Do you know what they're talking about?" Carina shakes her head equally baffled.

"Calm down" Griffin rolls his eyes. I want to gauge them out instead. "We'll tell you after the ceremony."

"That's a fucking eternity!" I scoff. The ceremony is already going to be long and boring. Now they're going to dangle a fucking secret in front of us and not spill? For weeks now I've had the burning urge to use a whip or cane. I shouldn't have chosen a flogger with my Halloween costume last October because it's haunted me ever since. My fingers flex seeking out the implement I no longer have access to. My skin screams for some kind of aggressive contact.

After partaking in the little fuck-a-thon at the sex estate
Hedonism,
with Carina and the guys, something in me shifted. I wasn't giving myself away so easily after the New Year. Yeah I still sought out sex but it lacked color, warmth, sensations. It was systematic, indifferent. I was no longer seeking experiences. I'd had them. There wasn't much out there when it came to college guys and sex. I thought leaving home would rid me of the monster Father and the others created. I thought the dark beast would remain dormant.

But I was wrong.

Touching that flogger awakened the monster. Made it long for things it shouldn't want. The darkness inside me refuses to be locked away again. I don't know how to tame it. I can no longer ignore it. Soon enough I'll have to deal with it.

~

"You've been quiet" Carina whispers. I haven't said much for the rest of the ride home with the whirlwind of activities. Now that the ceremony is over we're all hustling to exit the building to meet up with Diego. The graduation ceremony had been predictably boring but I barely noticed. I was too focused on the restlessness within me. Can Carina see it, sense it? Would she be afraid of me once she learns about it?

"I'm on my best behavior" I smirk. She knows I tone things down around her parents. No one truly loves anyone unconditionally. It's an unrealistic expectation. They're just empty words with hypocritical actions to back it up.

"My parents love you regardless" Carina chides already knowing where I'm going with this. Her words cause my chest to tighten. No matter how much time passes it still hurts to think about the loveless life I've lived. The years can't numb the painful memories or their bitter resentment.

"Griffin's family is coming over too" Diego announces as he poses for pictures with the family. I stay out of the way knowing it isn't my place to be included in it.

Yolanda vibrates with excitement as we enter the house. Whatever announcement Diego has to make it must be a good one. Ignacio continually whispers to Yolanda as if ensuring that the surprise won't prematurely spill from her lips. Griffin and his family come in right behind us. Everyone gathers into the living room waiting to hear the announcement.

Diego and Griffin begin by thanking everyone for their love and support. Really do I want to hear this shit? I'm already restless and edgy. Technically I'm not part of the family. "Griffin and I will be interning again this summer." Diego's voice captures my attention.

"That's wonderful" Griffin's mother beams. Apparently she's not in on the surprise like Yolanda appears to be.

"And" Griffin continues, "We've been accepted to the school of our choice to continue our education."

"At minimum we're pursuing our Master's," Diego spins off Griffin's sentence "Potentially doctorates."

"Where?" Carina's voice quivers. My heart squeezes at the thought. Diego and Griffin are so fucking smart they can literally go anywhere in the world. Carina barely sees him now. I can't imagine if he goes somewhere far that keeps him so busy that they can't even see each other during breaks.

"Right next to you muñeca" Diego proudly beams. He loves calling her his little doll. The words finally register. That's the bombshell he was waiting to drop. Carina squeals with delight and runs full speed into his arms. He throws his head back laughing at her enthusiasm before spinning her around in circles.

"Thank you" she happily sobs into his chest. Claws rake my throat threatening to gouge my insides. The beautiful sight before me hurts. It fucking hurts but it shouldn't. I should be happy for them. I should be joining in the hug-a-thon and be ecstatic for my best friend and her brother. Instead everything hurts, like one of those evil bastards placing a branding iron against my skin. What the fuck is wrong with me?

"They're being major cheese puffs" Griffin teases as he wraps his arm around my shoulders.

"What" I ask because I don't know what the hell he's talking about.

"You look like you swallowed a rock so I'm agreeing with you. Unless that scowl means that you can't handle me and Diego on a fulltime basis."

I relax my face not realizing I'd been so obvious about it. I roll my eyes trying to get back into the façade everyone else sees. "I can handle you two just fine." In reality I can barely handle Diego in small doses. He's too aware; too inquisitive; too fucking persistent. Every time he notices the cracks in my foundation he zeroes in on them. But it's always about the same time that we're parting ways.

Then it starts all over again. Each time the man thinks he's got something he realizes he's grasping at handfuls of sand. For a moment he has something, but then it's gone.