The Heartbreak Cafe (20 page)

Thinking
again about Charlie, Ruth’s stomach twisted at what had happened
when she’d bumped into him. She really hadn’t expected him to still
be so bitter. Granted what she’d done had been pretty hurtful, but
she was sure he’d be over that by now. It was five years after all.
Yet Charlie had never been one to take rejection easily, and given
the circumstances…

Ruth
thought back to how it been when they were together. She’d known
him for as long as she could remember, and their families lived on
the same road. They’d attended the same school and had always got
reasonably well, albeit they moved in very different circles. Ruth
ran with the popular gang while Charlie was quieter, more
studious.

Late in
their teens, he’d disappeared to Dublin for a few years to attend
university, but after graduation, came back with a view to taking
over his dad’s business. When Ruth bumped into him one day, she
couldn’t believe that this was the same guy who used to heckle her
as a child. The skinny, silly adolescent who’d left four years
earlier had come back full-on man.

Their
romance started slowly, they’d flirted casually whenever they ran
in to one another, which oddly enough, happened quite a
lot.

Then one
night, Charlie gave her a lift home, even though her house was only
walking distance from the village centre. She’d known that
something was going to happen and in truth, couldn’t wait. At that
point, she was so ready for Charlie to kiss her that before they
travelled the short distance to her house she asked him to pull
down a side street. Her dad usually kept an eye out for her to
return so she didn’t want an audience. He stopped the car and
looked at her and saying nothing, Ruth used her now-classic ‘come
hither’ expression. Charlie immediately leaned across the centre
console and pulled her close, his lips gentle, warm, and tender.
Ruth kissed him back with a fervent passion, and quickly began
pulling his shirt from the waistband of his pants.

Charlie
stopped. ‘No, no, not like this,’ he said in low growl.

‘
What? What are you talking about?’ Ruth was persistent,
continuing to kiss his neck, his mouth, his ears until finally, he
grabbed both sides of her face.

‘
No, I don’t want to ruin this,’ he said. ‘I think you and I
might have something here – something good, and I want to give it a
chance. If there is an us, I want to give it time to develop, and
if it does happen, I want it to be special.’

She
remembered worrying that she had been too pushy, coming onto him
like that, but her worries had been unfounded, because Charlie’s
next move was to ask her out on an official date. His sweet, almost
old-fashioned approached was surprising, and merely served to make
Ruth want him all the more. Hell, they’d been together for months
before they finally slept together.

She
remembered that first time, how he had told her he loved her, how
tender and sweet he had been. It was like something from a movie,
and she recalled at the time how she’d felt she was in fact playing
a part. Charlie knew all about her dreams of an acting career, knew
how much she wanted to move on from the TV soap, how she ached to
go right to the top.

Then one
night, after filming on the soap had wrapped for the day, Charlie
had come up to Dublin and arranged a special night out for them.
He’d booked a room in the Shelbourne hotel, they had dinner,
dancing, and champagne and when later that night they went back to
their room, there was one more surprise. A diamond engagement
ring.

Ruth
froze, the ring signifying all the things she didn’t want. If she
married Charlie, she would end up stuck in Lakeview, in Ireland.
There would be no Hollywood, no glamour, no film premieres. She was
born to be a star, not an Irish jobbing actor and just the wife of
small-town local boy.

However
much she cared about that local boy.

When
Charlie got down on one knee, Ruth cut him off; not wanting to hear
what she knew he was going to say.

‘
Don’t do this, you know I don’t want this.’

He stared
at her, hurt and confused, and she remembered telling herself that
she was an idiot, that she loved Charlie and would never find
anyone better than him. Still for both their sakes, she had to do
it, had to make sure he didn’t get the words out.

It was
too late anyway; Charlie fled the room and didn’t return and Ruth
wondered if he ever really took her seriously when she told him she
would be a star. Did he think, like the rest of the Irish acting
world, that she was deluding herself, that Hollywood was only a
pipe dream? If so, why on earth would he stop that dream in its
tracks by proposing? There was no question of him going along with
her to LA; he had all his responsibilities in Lakeview, and she’d
always thought there was this unspoken agreement that their time
together would inevitably come to an end.

That
night in Dublin was the last time she had seen him, and a week
later Ruth bought a plane ticket to LA and decided to never look
back.

Out of
sight, out of mind.

Glancing
at her watch again, she noted that almost five minutes had passed.
Right, that stick should surely be done by now.

She
walked tentatively into the bathroom, peeking around the corner
first as if the test had suddenly grown teeth and would snap at her
if she got too close. When she was about two feet away, she closed
her eyes and covered the remaining space by rote. Ruth placed her
hands on the cool ceramic and took a deep breath, hoping to try and
calm herself. She repeated her yoga mantra over and over in her
head. Positive or negative, life would go on … positive or
negative….

Slowly
she opened her eyes, and stared at her reflection in the mirror.
Finally she allowed her gaze move to the surface of the counter and
the white plastic stick that lay on top of it. Focusing in on the
display window, she sucked in her breath.

There was
a tiny pink cross.

She was
pregnant.

Minutes
later, Ruth grabbed a towel and wiped her mouth. So much for her
yoga chant. Almost as soon as she’d seen the positive sign and
realised its significance, her stomach had recoiled and she’d lost
her breakfast. Thankfully she’d been in close enough proximity to
the toilet.

She
grabbed the test and wrapped it in a plastic bag, before burying it
deep at the back of her wardrobe; she couldn’t run the risk of her
mother finding it. Then, collapsing onto her bed, she crawled under
the covers and felt the tears come.

How the
hell had she got herself into this mess?

She’d
give anything to go back and do that stupid party all over again.
If she could turn back time she would have refused the champagne
and the compliments, would have kept her wits about her, would have
never have fallen for Troy’s romantic claptrap.

Troy.

Ruth
groaned, thinking of the upcoming Glamazons shoot when she’d have
no choice but to see him again. Thinking about the series brought
everything sharply into focus. Oh no, she couldn’t have this baby,
her career would be over, her body would be ruined, everything that
she had worked for flushed down the toilet, all because of one
stupid drunken night!

How had
she been such an idiot? How was she going to tell Troy, or the
producers…

Then
again, Ruth thought quickly, maybe Troy didn’t even have to know,
nobody might have to know.

No no,
she had to tell him, there was no way that she could get through
this without him knowing what had happened. Regardless of the fact
that she owed him nothing and they weren’t a couple, weren’t even
dating, she still knew that telling him would be the right thing to
do.

Then they
would be in it together, and who knew, maybe the show’s writers
might be able to work it into the plot, and come up with an even
better storyline as a result? Actually Ruth thought, her mind
racing, it could be the making of them. Not of her and Troy as a
couple, surely there was no question of that, but imagine the
publicity!

She
grabbed her cell-phone and scrolled through her contacts. When she
came to his name she paused for a moment thinking of that night,
the way he felt, the things he said to her. Her hands
subconsciously moved to her stomach. Wow, to think that they’d
created a life that night.

Then Ruth
shook her head; she couldn’t think about that just now, couldn’t
waste time wondering about it. It was the implications that
mattered at the moment.

She
pressed a button on her phone and waited for their call to be
connected across thousands of miles. It rang four or five times and
she was sure it was about to go to voicemail when:

‘
Hello….?’ Troy said groggily, and at the sound of his voice,
Ruth felt her stomach twist involuntarily. Then she checked the
time. Uh-oh, she’d forgotten it was the middle of the night in
L.A.

‘
Troy?’

‘
Yeah, who is it?’

‘
Um …did I wake you?’

A low
groan. ‘Yeah…who is this?’

‘
It’s Ruth. I’m so sorry – I can call you back …’

‘
No, it’s fine, I’m awake.’

‘
Lookit, it’s grand, it wasn’t that important, and I suppose it
can wait –’

‘
Wow, your accent is really strong!’

Ruth too
realised that her Irish accent had come out in full force. Nerves,
she supposed. ‘Well, after a few weeks here, I suppose it does come
back a bit.’

‘
So hey, how are you babes? Did you get my message from before?
That morning – you just took off.’

She
realised he was talking about the last time they saw each other. ‘I
got your message, thanks and yes, I’m sorry about that.’

‘
Why?’

She
frowned. ‘You mean why am I sorry, or why did I run
off?’

There was
a laugh on the other end. ‘Maybe both. I would have really liked to
kiss you good morning.’

Was he
flirting with her? ‘Oh.’

‘
So what’s up Ruth? Why are you calling now? Did you miss me?
Just had to hear the sound of my voice, huh?’

Bloody
hell. Ruth had almost forgotten about the size of the guy’s ego but
of course it was almost in direct proportion to… Shocked by her own
train of thought, she shook the idea out of her head.

‘
Well I’m calling for a reason actually,’

‘
I knew it. You do miss me. So when are you coming
back?’

‘
No. I mean … well, I’m actually not sure.’

‘
You want me to catch a plane over there to you, babe? Finish
what we started?’

Ruth felt
annoyed, wishing he would just shut up for a minute so she could
get this out.

‘
Troy, please, I need to talk to you. This is
serious.’

It seemed
he finally got the message. ‘Hey, are you okay?’

‘
Yes, yes, I’m fine. Well, actually, I’m not fine, I’m sort of
shocked and really confused and well…’

‘
What is it? Whatever it is, I’ll help you get through
it.’

Ruth
raised an eyebrow, liking the way he said that. Maybe she would
actually be able to count on his support? Maybe his notorious
playboy image was just that – an image, and by the flirty way he
was talking to her, maybe there might be a future for
them?

‘
Really? It’s good to hear that Troy, because …you see, well
actually …it’s just that … I’m pregnant.’

For a
long moment, there was complete silence on the other end of the
line.

‘
What the hell?’ he spluttered eventually, his velvet tone
turning to venomous. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

Ruth’s
heart raced. ‘It means… that I’m pregnant Troy, I just took a
test.’

‘
And you’re telling me because…?’

It was as
if he’d slapped her. She wasn’t sure exactly what kind of a
response she’d been expecting from him, but it certainly wasn’t
this. ‘Why do you think?’

‘
Ah come on Ruth. You’re not thinking it could be
mine?’

Her eyes
widened. ‘Thinking …Troy, we had sex about a zillion times that
night and remember that whole problem with the condom? I realise
the night is probably a little fuzzy round the edges – for both of
us – but surely you remember that much?’

‘
Yeah, but who’s to say it happened that night?’

Ruth
froze. He’d basically implied she was a whore, suggesting the same
thing that the papers have been saying about her.

That
might have been easier to take if there was any truth in it, but
the thing was that he was the one who was constantly hooking up
with his co-stars, while she on the other hand, hadn’t dated anyone
seriously in years.

‘
What are you trying to say to me, Troy?’ she replied, ice in
her tone.

‘
Well, you know, I read the papers too and…’ he trailed off and
she sensed him shrug.

As if
this sort of stuff should be just par for the course for
her.