The Girl by the Thames (8 page)

But now those feeling were seeping out and a sadness heavier than a planet hung behind her eyes. Seeing this beautiful creature lying helpless on a polluted mud bank among beer cans and shopping trolleys had awakened something powerful within her.

She couldn’t stay like this for much longer. She looked weird just standing there staring at the whale. She wanted to turn and walk away but she couldn’t seem to tear her eyes from it. 

All her ambition and scheming had evaporated now. She felt bad for wanting to get this close to it, like it was some freak show. Her reasons for coming were purely selfish, just like everyone else’s. She wanted to be here and look at it, so she could say
I’ve seen the whale, I was there
. It was just to show off and feel special, something she could boast about to impress everyone.

But now she was here in front of it, she felt ashamed of herself. This thing was a living, breathing, thinking animal. Maybe it was just as smart as her. She’d read in her book how clever whales were. What must it be thinking right now? Tanya was only adding to its misery, another strange little ant person staring at the weird sea creature stuck here all alone.

“Excuse me miss,” said a voice behind her. Tanya was snatched away from her thoughts. She turned to see one of the policemen she’d given the tea to. “Can I see your pass please?”

The old Tanya swiftly returned.

“Did you like your tea?” she said, pretending to search her pocket.

“It was lovely, thanks. I need to see that pass. Only authorised people can be down here,” he said.

Tanya checked everywhere and found nothing but ancient food wrappers and a piece of chewed gum that had cemented itself to the one of the pockets. 

“Silly me.” She smiled. “I must have left it at the café when I went and got the teas. I’ll pick it up on the way back.”

“Well, thing is, none of the other council workers know you …”

“She’s with me,” said a voice Tanya recognised, but couldn’t quite remember who it belonged to. Tanya turned a little too eagerly to see who it was. The squelchy mud nearly made her lose her balance.

“Have you forgotten your pass again?” It was Greg, the guy from that weird charity, the one that rescues animals. What was it called, the BDSM? No, wasn’t that the kinky stuff with whips and leather?

Greg was in the same waterproofs he wore when Tanya first met him, except now they were filthy. A broad smile stretched across his face even though he looked desperate for sleep.

“Er, yeah,” said Tanya.

“Unbelievable,” said Greg, turning to the Policeman. “This is the girl who first discovered the whale. She’s a hero.”

“Oh,” said the PC. “Well done to you.”

That was a first for Tanya, being praised by a copper.

“She can find a whale in the middle of London, but she can’t find her pass. That’s our Tanya,” said Greg.

Tanya couldn’t believe Greg even remembered her name.

“Oops, silly me,” she said.

Greg undid the chunky zip that ran across the front of his waterproofs. He reached in and took out a small plastic card.

“Here, you can have mine,” Greg said, handing it to Tanya. “Everyone knows me by now so I probably won’t need it.”

She took the pass and slipped it into her back pocket.

“Well, that’s all cleared up, then,” said the policeman, turning to walk away. “Oh, and thanks again for the tea.”

Greg looked puzzled. “Have you been buying tea for the local constabulary?”

“Yeah, how else do you think I got past them?”

“So where’s mine then?” Greg asked.

“Where’s your what?”

“My tea, I’m gasping.”

“Oh, er, I binned the rest of it. Want me to get some more?”

“Tanya, I’m kidding. Hey, do you want to meet him?”

“Who?”

“Who do you think?” Greg pointed to the whale.

Chapter 9

Tanya twisted one foot so it buried into the gloopy mud. Her face turned away towards the metal ramp. “Er, actually I was just going.”

“Not scared, are you?”

“I ain’t scared of nothing,” said Tanya. Greg had pushed the right button. Tanya’s face became pinched with anger.

“I didn’t think you were,” said Greg. “Follow me, but watch your footing.”

Tanya took small, slow steps towards the mountainous sea creature. She was still shaky and managed to hide her fear, but she was glad when Greg distracted her with talk.

“This poor fellow is just a young-un, like you,” he said.

“Really?”

“Oh yeah, he’s a juvenile. Should really be with his mother. Probably got separated from her.”

“Shit, that’s harsh,” Tanya said, concentrating on keeping up with Greg, who had a knack of moving across the mud without looking like he’d just learnt to walk.

“We need to keep him calm, otherwise he’ll go into shock and we won’t be able to pull him off this bank when the tide comes in. That’s why we have to keep everyone back. We need to keep pouring water over him to keep his skin moist.”

Tanya saw a network of people ferrying buckets of water from the river and carefully pouring them over the whale’s flesh.

“Their skin is very delicate. Even in our damp climate it will dry out. Would you like to have a go?”

“Me?” said Tanya.

“Yeah, just grab a bucket, fill it up and pour some water over him. Don’t get it in the blowhole, otherwise you’ll really piss him off.”

“Do whales get pissed off?” Tanya stopped; she didn’t like the sound of this.

“No, not at all, they’re dead peaceful, real softies. That’s why we need to look after him.”

“Er, I don’t know if I can.” Nobody had shown her that much trust before. Tanya didn’t do responsibility, especially where animals were concerned. Every goldfish she’d ever won at the fair had died the very next day. Besides, the thought of getting close to the whale terrified her.

“Come on, it’s just a bucket of water. Hey, you might enjoy it and we’ll have to give you a job.”

“No, I’m okay thanks,” said Tanya.

“Not chicken are you?”

“No way,” Tanya snapped. Greg had pushed the same button again. She knew what he was doing but she couldn’t help it. Not showing fear was so embedded in her brain it had become an automatic reaction.

Greg handed her a battered plastic bucket and told her to fill it up. He watched as she teetered her way down to the river’s edge and back again. It was slow going. He led her up to the side of the whale. It was like standing in front of a thick black wall of rubber.

“What do I do?” asked Tanya.

“Any patches that look dry, simply pour water on them. Then get another one, and so on.”

Tanya took a step back and threw the bucket of water at the whale like she was washing a car. Most of it went on the other people who were helping to keep the whale wet. There were a few dirty looks.

“Whoah, gently,” said Greg.

“Sorry.”

Tanya scooped up another load of river water and tried again. This time she held the bucket up high and let the water gently cascade down its side. She spread it across its skin with her hand. It felt like smooth plastic.

“That’s it, Tanya, you’ve got the hang of it,” said Greg.

It was just a simple thing, yet Tanya felt a warm glow swaddle her body and her permanent scowl melted into a happy grin. Tanya immediately headed back down to the water’s edge to get another refill. She felt like a new born foal crossing the sticky mud, always in danger of toppling over. When she got back to the whale, she took her time, selecting the spot that looked the driest, then she poured the bucket slowly across its side, watching in satisfaction as it drenched his parched body.

Every time she’d finished with one bucket she couldn’t wait to get another. Like a child at the seaside she did it again and again and again, pouring hundreds of buckets over the whale, never tiring and never getting bored. Gradually she got quicker and better at getting over the mud. Each trip was like the start of an adventure, another chance to get close to this supernatural creature.

Roger appeared and came up to Greg.

“Hey, have you seen our new volunteer?” Greg pointed to Tanya, who was working away like a machine.

“Isn’t that …”

“Hi Rog,” said Tanya waving and sloshing another bucket from the river.

“Well, I never,” said Roger. “She’s a good little worker. I’d never have guessed it.”

“She’s been at it for over three hours non-stop. Hey, Tanya, take a break.”

“No I’m fine.”

Each time she poured another bucket over the whale, she talked to it, told it that everything would be okay. She didn’t care what anyone thought of her. This poor creature was like her; they’d both lost their mums and were now up to their necks in crap. She couldn’t escape her situation, but maybe she could help the whale escape his.

Tanya’s legs started to ache and it was getting harder and harder to plough through the adhesive mud.

“Okay, Tanya, we’ll call it a day now,” said Greg.

“No, I’m fine. I want to carry on.”

“Tanya, you looked tired.”

“So do you.” Tanya wasn’t even looking at Greg. She headed down to the water to fill up another bucket. Her left foot dug into the mud and wouldn’t come out. She tugged it and a second later she was flat on her face.

“Bollocks!” she shouted. Everyone looked round. Tanya tried to lift herself up as if nothing had happened. Mud clung to her face and hair like she was some strange sort of undead clown. “I need to wash myself off, then I’m coming back.”

“Calm down,” said Greg, “Why don’t you take a break and come back later? The whale’s not going anywhere.”

“But I might miss something.”

“You won’t, I promise. We’re going to try and get him back out into the water on the next high tide and that’s not until later tonight.”

“Really?”

“Go home, get some sleep and come back around 7pm. Then you’ll be refreshed and ready for it.”

Greg made sense. Tanya knew it. And unlike most adults he didn’t shout at her, he just said it normally without being patronising.

“Okay, I think I’ll go back, then,” said Tanya.

“Me and Rog are going to take a nap in the car.”

“You could come back to mine, I’ll make you something to eat. It’s not far,” said Tanya.

“That’s really kind of you,” said Rog, “but we need to be here, just in case.”

“Okay, see you guys later.”

“Thanks for the help. You worked really hard this morning.”

“Anytime,” Tanya said. Before she left Tanya went up to the whale and whispered to it: “Don’t go anywhere without me, big fella. I’ll be back soon.” She stretched her arms out, trying to hug the whale; it was like wrapping her arms around the world.

Tanya headed for the ramp, waving goodbye to Greg and Rog as she went. At the top she took one last look at the whale just to make sure he was still there.

Chapter 10

Tanya pushed open the door to her dad’s flat. Caution took over, as it always did when she returned home after nicking money from him. Had he noticed there was money missing? Tanya had two ways of dealing with it: walk in like nothing had happened, or distract him with talk, and she had plenty to talk about. After her experience with the whale, she had to tell someone. Otherwise she would burst. Usually she would have told Lena, but Tanya’s credit on her phone had been used up. Besides, whales weren’t really Lena’s thing, especially now she was in with the Niners. Wildlife and gangsters didn’t really mix.

Tanya opted to use all her chat on her dad. Keep him talking and hopefully he’d already forgotten about the tenner in his wallet. This was just a safety precaution.

Tanya stood in the door to the lounge, still covered in flakes of river mud. Her dad’s hi-vis jacket was also covered. It wasn’t exactly hi-vis anymore.

“Hey, dad I’ve been helping out with the whale, you know, the one stuck in the Thames.” She immediately felt stupid. What other whale would there be?

Her dad didn’t reply. He sat there in his chair in a long dressing gown that had yellow food stains down the front. His eyes were fixed on the TV. It was some black and white footage of storm troopers matching past Adolf Hitler.

“Dad, I said I’ve been down on the river bank with the whale.”

“Shut up, I’m watching this,” he said, without taking his eyes from the screen. SS guards were now shoving frightened Jews into cattle trucks. His nose twitched. “What is that stench?”

“Like I just said, I’ve been down in the river, with the whale.”

“That figures, you smell like shit.”

As Tanya turned to leave him to his miserable viewing, she noticed a brown box shoved against the lounge wall. “What’s this?” she asked.

Her dad sprang out of the chair and was beside her in a second. She’d never seen him move so fast. He shoved her away and marched her out of the lounge. “You don’t look at that, it’s nothing to do with you. Understand?”

“Yeah, fine. What is it? Porn?” As soon as the words came out she knew it was a mistake. The slap stung her cheek.

“That’s just what you’d think, isn’t it? Her dad’s face was close to hers, almost touching. Then he recoiled at the sight and smell of her dirty face. “You’re useless, just like your mother. Whereas I’m doing something important, and it’s nothing to do with you. So don’t get in my way. You touch that box and you’re dead. Now get out of my sight, and take a bath. I can’t stand that stink. In fact, I can’t stand having you around full stop. I want you out of this flat as much as possible from now on. And when you do come back, you ring me first to make sure it’s okay.” 

“Fine. Why would I want to hang around here anyway?”

“Good. And another thing. You better start thinking of somewhere else to live too.

“What, but how? I haven’t got a job.”

“Exactly, so you better start looking. Now get lost.” He shoved Tanya into the hallway where she stood digesting his words. So he was going to kick her out. Tanya quickly dismissed it. He was always making hollow threats. When it came to it, he was just too lazy to do anything about it. Getting her out would take energy, and that was one thing her dad didn’t have a great deal of.

The box didn’t make any sense, though. She’d find out what was in it. She’d take a peek when he was asleep or when he was passed out from drinking. A kettle and some steam would get the parcel tape off so he wouldn’t notice what she’d been up to. Until then, Tanya would just have to guess what he was hiding. Knowing him it would be something stolen that he could sell down the market or the pub.

Tanya went into the bathroom. It was filthy as usual. Her father hadn’t washed it out since his last bath and a smudge of brown dirt encircled the tub. She didn’t have the energy to clean it and stripped off to have a shower. They didn’t have a proper shower, it was a rubber hose that forked into two and then attached to each tap. Tanya pushed each end on and ran her fingers under the shower head to get the temperature right. Tiny fountains of water escaped from cracks along the hose so all that came from the shower head was a weak dribble, but it was enough. No matter how hard she fiddled with the taps it was either too hot and burned her skin off, or colder than a river. Tanya opted for scalding hot as the better alternative.

She quickly washed her hair and body before the super-heated water turned her skin red. Twisting her hair up in a towel, she wrapped another around her body and stepped out into the hallway. The sudden change of temperature made her feel woozy. Her aching limbs were now giving up and her belly wanted food. The thought of making something to eat made her even more tired. The pull of sleep was far stronger than hunger. She opened the door to her room and fell onto bed like a fallen tree. A couple of seconds later Tanya was asleep.

There were shouts from behind. The thump of heavy-booted feet vibrated along the pavement and Tanya knew instinctively to run. She quickly accelerated into a sprint and allowed herself a swift glance over her shoulder. Experience had taught her it was always useful to know who you were running from. About ten policeman in full riot gear were bundling towards her.

“She’s a fake,” shouted one of them.

“Fake, fake fake, fake,” they chanted as they ran, banging their batons against their shields in time. The noise was thunderous and seemed to make them move faster, like a tribal beat. Tanya could hear them closing the gap. Running was becoming harder. Her legs moved but her feet kept slipping on the pavement, like the tarmac was made of Teflon. Any second now and they would be on her.

Tanya ran onto the road hoping the grip would be better. As she put her feet on the grey mottled surface, she fell straight through. It was liquid, but not like water, this stuff was thick and jelly–like. She struggled to stay afloat and panicked.

“Help,” she shouted, slipping under. 

The police stopped and looked at her, impassively. Their faces were strangely blank, emotionless, like zombies. None of them made an effort to help her.

“Help, I’m drowning,” Tanya shouted, nearly slipping under.

The coppers didn’t seem to notice she was in trouble. All at once, their heads swivelled to look at something further up the liquid road. Tanya managed to turn herself round while trying to keep afloat, to see what they were looking at.

A large black shape flew towards her through the greyness. It was mostly submerged, an island of black flesh skimming above the surface. It was the whale.

Tanya screamed and tried to swim for the pavement. Her arms and legs flailed uselessly. Instead of moving forward she got sucked further out. As the whale was nearly upon her it suddenly dived beneath the surface pointing its great tail in the air. Tanya watched in awe as it slid beneath the strange dark water. 

All round her the liquid gradually calmed. Tanya looked to the pavement but the policemen had gone. Everything around her began to spin, making her revolve like water down a plug hole. The whirlpool got faster and faster, and the street around her began to blur. Tanya opened her mouth to scream but before the sound could escape she got sucked down.

Then it went black.

There was no light coming from anywhere, not even the smallest chink. At least she could touch the bottom of wherever she was and keep her head above the liquid sloshing around her chest. She was in some sort of cave.

“Hello,” she said but the sound of her voice didn’t seem right, it was muffled and odd. She moved her feet and found that she was standing on something soft and spongy. A deep, groan came from all around her, enveloping her like loneliness. And then she realised.

She was inside the whale.

Her mind went into a tail spin while her body went wild with panic. She had to get out or she would go mad. She waded around screaming, trying to find some edge to this prison of flesh. How long did she have before she was digested? Minutes? Hours? Days? What if it was weeks? It was too horrific to think about.

Tanya found the walls of the whale’s insides and began clawing and scratching. It was slimy and her fingers sunk into its flesh without effect. As she desperately scratched away, the level of the liquid began to rise. Tanya’s arms flailed wildly, windmilling everywhere. The liquid reached her shoulders and then her chin. In a few seconds she’d be drowning. It was up to her lips now, she gasped for one last breath. But it was too late and she took in a mouthful of fluid. She expected to retch, thinking it was the whale’s digestive juices. But the taste was familiar. It was alcohol. The liquid she was drowning in was not stomach fluids, but beer. This would be the biggest and last binge drink of her sorry little life.

Tanya screamed.

She opened her eyes and sat bolt upright in bed.

“Whoah, easy.” Lena was sitting on the bed in front of her with an opened can of lager. She’d been wafting it under Tanya’s nose, using it like smelling salts to wake her up. “What’s the matter with you?”

“I just had a mental dream,” Tanya said, trying to swallow huge gulps of air.

“I thought you was possessed or something, here.” Lena tossed Tanya a cold beer from a plastic bag she had on the floor. Tanya caught it, just. Her head was still getting used to being back in the real world. “There’s plenty more where that came from, and I’ve got some great news.”

Tanya handed the can back. “Thanks Lena, but I don’t fancy it at the moment.”

“Don’t be daft, get stuck in,” Lena said, lobbing the can back to Tanya. She didn’t catch it this time and it rolled down the bed covers and onto the floor.

“No, really, I just had a nightmare that I was drowning in beer.”

“Nightmare? That sounds like my ideal dream.” Lena stood up, “Get this, you’ll want to celebrate when I tell you this. I have managed to get you into the Niners, of course you’ll have to pass an initiation, but ain’t it cool? So come on drink up because tonight we’re both members of the gang. Woo-hoo.” Lena danced around the room with her beer still in her hand.

“Oh, wow. Thanks, Lena. Er, that’s great.”

Lena stopped dancing. “Well show some emotion then.” Lena flopped on the bed. “Don’t you know what that means? You and me are in the coolest, hardest gang in the neighbourhood. That means no more scrounging for drinks, no more begging to get into clubs, no-one looking down on us and no-one getting in our way.”

“Listen, that’s great and I’ll come along and hang out with the gang, but I’ve just got some stuff to do.”

“What stuff?”

“You know, stuff.”

“What’s more important than being in the Niners? Come on, get dressed, we’re going to party.”

Lena stood over Tanya and grabbed her hand to drag her out of bed but Tanya snatched it away.

“What is wrong with you? Come on, girl. What’s the matter?” Lena said, sitting back down on the bed.

“I just, kinda got involved with helping that whale that was stuck.”

Lena laughed snapping her head back. They were big sarcastic belly laughs designed to humiliate rather than share. “You and Free Willy? What is all this girl-guide shit?”

“It’s not,” Tanya replied. “You’ve got to see it. He’s amazing, like the most amazing thing you’ve ever seen.”

“
He
? You’ll be shagging it next.”

“Why don’t you come along? I’ve got a pass now. I could get you past the security. It’s mental, I’m telling you.”

“A pass? You’ve got it bad. Why would I want to see some stinky old fish. Anyway, I hate fish, it tastes rank.”

“Lena, we’re not going to eat it and anyway whales aren’t …”

“…Fish, yeah, I know, I’m not stupid. They’re mammals like us, so what? Who cares? Just forget about it, it’ll be dead soon.”

“No it won’t, we’re going to attempt a rescue on the hide tide.”

“
We’re going to attempt a rescue on the high tide
,” Lena said in a mocking voice. “Listen to yourself. You’re turning into a geek.”

“I’m not. I just want to help it get back into the sea is all. Come on, come and see him. It’s like seeing a dinosaur or something.”

“No way.” Lena got off the bed and picked up her plastic bag of booze. “Do you know what I had to do to get you in the Niners?”

Tanya didn’t say anything.

“I had a fight.”

“With one of the girls?”

“Nope, with one of the boys. And I won. That’s what I did for you. Because you’re my best mate. Then I come over here to give you the good news and all I get is a load of Finding Nemo bollocks.”

“Oh, Lena, I didn’t know. You didn’t have to do that.”

“Well, I did. That’s the last time I do anything for you.” Lena opened the door and was gone.

Tanya lay back down again. Normally, if they’d argued like that, neither of them would’ve backed down. Tanya would have been after her and out on the walkway screaming at Lena and calling her a bitch, and vice versa. Then they’d have a scrap, a proper one with fists and kicking. Then the tears would follow and they’d make up, telling each other they were sorry and would be best mates forever. It would all be very dramatic and intense. But all the fight had gone out of Tanya. None of that other stuff seemed so important anymore.