The Fire Inside (26 page)

His gaze focused on Tess, he asked, “You
okay?” His voice was hoarse, with traces of panic.

“I’m shaken and sore,” Tess answered. “But
basically okay.” Her pale face with some scratches on it belied her
words. Still, she didn’t seem seriously hurt. He’d only heard from
his secretary that she was in EMS, and he’d gone to find her.
Letting out a deep breath, he turned to Larissa for
confirmation.

Her gaze was knowing, as if she sensed what
was happening. He was beyond caring what the scenario with him and
Tess looked like. “Like she said, she’s sore and scratched up some,
but she’ll be fine. Jack, this isn’t—”

“Larissa, I need to see Tess alone.”

Eyebrows raised, she looked to Tess. “Captain
Righetti?”


“Yeah, it’s fine. Thanks for the help.”

“Take those pain pills I gave you.” She
squeezed Jack’s shoulder. “Calm down, cowboy. Tess is better off
than you are.”

After Larissa left, Jack crossed to the small
examining table. The blinds were slanted and a few rays of sun
peeked through, accenting her lack of color. Without saying
anything, he pulled her gently into his arms. Still seated, she
clung to him.

“Are you really not hurt?” His hand cradled
her head.

“I’m not.” Her voice was too soft. “I’m
shaken over what happened, though.”

When he pulled back, he kept hold of her
hands. “Tell me. I don’t know the details.”

“We were doing some basics in the smokehouse.
One at a time, to see how the recruits would react independently.”
She explained the exercise. “When Mauro’s turn came up, he drew the
unlucky straw.”

“This is about
Mauro
?”


“Yeah. He disobeyed orders when his Mayday
alarm went off. He wouldn’t exit the building until he got the
dummy freed. Olive got on him.”

“And you?”

“Well, I wasn’t nice to him, Jack. He’d blown
it this time. I stopped him as he was leaving and he pushed me
away. That’s when I fell.”

“Shit.”

“I’m fine, Jack, but
he’s
out of
control.”

His mind whirred. Tess, Danny, Tess, Danny.
He tried to sound calm when he asked, “What did you say to him? Did
you taunt him?”

Frowning, Tess straightened and slid back
some on the table. “I’m not sure I like where this conversation is
going.
I
didn’t do anything wrong. And I don’t have to
defend myself to you.”

“I’m worried about Danny’s state of
mind.”

The
recruit
is arrogant, Dr. Harrison.
He thinks he knows everything.”

“There’s more to him. Something worrisome is
going on inside him.” He held her gaze. “I should have foreseen
this was coming.”

“
This
, involving me?”

“Yeah. The recruits…Mauro…they…” He stopped,
unsure of how to proceed.

Her gaze narrowed, then she cocked her head.
The angle showed some black-and-blue marks on her jaw “Spit it out,
Jack.”

Oh, hell. “They complain about you,
Tess.”

A long pause. She stared at him. “They? Not
just Mauro?”

“Yeah. Three or four more. They say you’re
too hard on them. You
are
, sweetheart. I told you that
before.”

She watched him. Her eyes were clear and
something else…accusing. “What do you say, Jack, when the recruits
complain about an officer?”

“I tell them there are different methods of
teaching. Some tough, some laid back. What you and I discussed
before.”

“What else did you talk about? Ways to get
around me? Did you tell them to report this to the brass?”

“Of course not.” He ran a hand through his
hair. “You’re overreacting.”

“Am I?”

“I’m telling you the truth to help you.”

“If complaints about me were so pervasive
among the recruits, which I still doubt, and if there was some
serious concerns about Mauro’s attitude, you should have informed
me.”

“I said the class was confidential.”

“Yeah, well, you said a lot of things.”


“What does that mean?”

Temper lit her face. “Would you move
back?”

When he did, she slipped off the table and
wrapped her arms around her waist. The self-protective gesture cut
him to the quick. “You’ve allowed the recruits to complain about
me, because maybe you wanted to be proven right. All the while, you
were telling me how much you cared about me. Can’t you see the
problem with that?”

She’d manipulated what he’d told her. “First
off, I had to let them say what they thought. I have a
responsibility to deal with issues they have.”

“Yeah, that savior complex sure comes out
with them.”

“What?”

“You think you have to save everybody, even
me. You don’t.”

Was that true about him?

“Look, come over tonight after I cook at
House 7. We’ll go step-by-step through how these complaints
unfolded in class. You’ve skewed the entire thing.” When she
hesitated, he begged. “Tess, please.”

“I will, depending on how you answer this.
Recruits ask my opinion on things all the time. Did they ask for
yours, on me being too tough?”

He felt as if he’d gotten socked in the gut.
“Tess, I—”

“They did, didn’t they? And you agreed with
them.”

“It wasn’t that simple.”

“It is to me. Answer the question.”

Fuck it, he was upset too, about the things
she’d said to him. And now she backed him into a corner. So he
lifted his chin and spoke in anger. “They
did
ask me. I
did
agree. But you’re making my behavior in class out to be
something sinister, and I resent that.”

She shook her head. “What a fool I was to get
close to you. To trust you again.”

That made him madder. Especially because he
sensed there was more to her getting angry like this. “You’re
throwing roadblocks into our relationship. You never let anybody
get too close to you. It’s because of Joey and your loss. As a
matter of fact, this whole thing about being tough is about Joey.
If someone had been tougher with him, you think he might have been
okay.”

Her face reddened and her lips thinned.
“Yeah, Doc, well, look in the mirror. You do with the recruits what
you do with Sara.”

“What are you talking about?”


“You coddle Sara. Maybe you should analyze
yourself before you start judging others. I’ll bet there’s a
boatload of psychological things that go into letting Sara get away
with anything she wants to do.”

“Sara’s fine.”

“For the time being.” With that, she circled
around him and started for the door.

“Are you coming over tonight?”

She whirled on him. “No. Never again.”

“You don’t mean that.”


“Yes, I do. We’re done, Doc.”

For a minute her face got so sad, he was
taken aback by it. “I never should have let this happen.”

“Tess…”

But she opened the door and strode out. Jack
let her go. Hell, he thought, nursing his anger. She’d
misinterpreted what he’d done. Shit! He kicked the wastebasket in
the EMS office across the room and kept swearing.

o0o

Shaky, sad and still pissed as hell, Tess
pulled into the Malvasos’ driveway and turned off the engine.
Thankfully, the house was dark. She tried to recall what the
family’s plans were tonight. Mitch was working, and Sabina was out
with Will Rossettie. Sabby and Megan had something to do together
for Girl Scouts. At least Tess wouldn’t have to face anybody. Dazed
by the ugly fight with Jack, she wanted to get inside, crawl under
the covers and pull them over her head. On the drive home, she
admitted to herself that she acted badly and had made decisions in
the heat of anger. What she’d said made her cringe. She hadn’t
meant to say she wouldn’t see him again. Didn’t mean it now. Her
anger got the best of her. Damn it to hell. Exiting the car, she
headed to the front door.

Two feet away from the porch, she stopped in
her tracks. On the steps sat Danny Mauro. Still dressed in his blue
uniform, which accented wide shoulders, he looked big and strong.
Very big. Very strong.

Her mind raced. At six o’clock, it was still
daylight. He probably wouldn’t try to hurt her out in the open,
with neighboring houses not far away. But she’d been shocked when
he pushed her earlier, and he couldn’t be doing well, so her pulse
began to race. She darted a glance behind her. Could she get to her
car without him stopping her?

“Please, don’t leave. I won’t hurt you. I
didn’t mean to today.” He sounded desperate. And desperate people
did things.

What to do? She didn’t feel safe. But when
she got a good look at his face, she saw the kind of sadness that
was familiar. Now she realized she’d seen the same expression in
Joey’s face, too, whenever he’d screwed up. But she never
recognized it for what it was, either time.

“All right, I won’t leave. But I’m taking my
phone from my pocket”—she slipped it out—“and pressing 9-1. If you
get out of line, I’ll hit the last button, and the police will
come.”

“I won’t get out of line. I promise.” He
sounded like a little boy. “I’m sick of getting out of line.” He
scooted over on the steps. “Wanna sit?” Again, the hoarseness, the
gravity of his tone.

But she had to beware. “I’ll stand, for now
anyway.”

He glanced to the side. The evening sun hit
his face and she realized his cheek was wet. The kid had been
crying. Again, Tess was thrown back into time, when Joey had been
arrested for reckless driving. At the jail, he’d sobbed.

So she tried to soften her tone. “What’s
going on, Danny?”

“You never called me that before.”

“I haven’t?”

He shook his head. Took a deep breath. “First
off, I’m sorry I pushed you today. I didn’t know what I was doing.
I was ready to explode and had to get out of there.”

“I can accept that. But what about the rest
of the time? You’ve been surly and rude this whole four weeks.”

A half smile. “I could say the same about
you.”

The comment made her stop. She knew she’d
been tough, but had she been…mean to him?

“I probably shouldn’t have said that. You’re
the instructor. You have to be hard on us.”

“If you know that, how can you explain your
behavior?”

His whole face tensed as if he was trying to
get something out but couldn’t. Finally, he said in such a low
voice she had to struggle to hear, “Because I don’t want to be at
the Academy.” His voice even lower. “I don’t want to be a
firefighter.”

She never expected that. “Then, why are you
in the program? You’re smart. You could do anything with your
life.”

His body folded over itself, and he slid his
arms around his legs. He looked ready to break. “I know. I, um, got
into Notre Dame the week I was accepted in the fire
department.”

“That’s great.”

“I didn’t tell my parents.”


“Why?”

“Because it’s expected that I’ll be a
firefighter. I didn’t want to let anybody down, but now, getting
kicked out of the Academy is going to be worse than if I never
went. My dad’s retired, but my brothers still work in Camden
Cove.”

Jack’s accusations, no matter how mad she’d
gotten over them, made her think hard about what she would do in
the next few minutes. What if this was Joey? What would she want an
adult to do here? Tess felt the importance of this moment. What she
did, what she
chose
to do, was going to be crucial to this
boy’s life. “Danny, the jury’s still out on what will happen to you
because of today. You haven’t been asked to leave.”

“I will be.”

“Not necessarily.” She nodded to the step.
“Move over now. We’ll sit and talk about this.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah.” Her smile was genuine as she dropped
down on the hard cement. “Seriously.”

“How’s the flight attendant, McCabe?” This
from Lisa Beth Duncan. Both were paramedics on Quint and Midi 7
night shift. This group had asked Jack to cook another meal soon
after the first, which he usually didn’t do. But they wanted to
talk about an issue they’d had with a person who subbed in the
house often. Firefighters using him as a sounding board for daily
issues was what he wanted to happen because of his visits, so he’d
agreed.

McCabe, the handsome black man, grinned at
his HCFD partner. “You won’t believe the stories she has about the
passengers. Last night, a woman got on the plane with a stack of
magazines a foot high.”

“To read?”

“Nope. When the plane hit a bumpy patch, they
heard a tearing sound from seat 9B. Lacey checked it out and saw
the woman had ripped apart an entire magazine.” His warm brown eyes
sparkled. “Every time they hit a bump, she tore more
magazines.”

The firefighters laughed. At the stove,
stirring cheese into the fettuccine Alfredo he’d made, Jack focused
on the banter instead of the debacle he’d had an hour ago with
Tess. He wouldn’t think about that until later, when he could see
her. If she didn’t come to him, he planned to march right over to
the Malvaso house and confront her.

“Hey, Doc, how would you analyze the woman’s
actions?”

“Everybody has a coping mechanism, but that’s
a new one to me.”

McCabe chuckled. “It was mess to clean
up.”

“Better than if she barfed,” one of the group
said.

“Dinner’s on,” he said, playing the dad role.
“No talk about barfing.”

While they lined up, Jack stood back and
tried to enjoy their enthusiasm for his meal. But his mind didn’t
cooperate—he still could see Tess, hurt and shocked, sitting on
that exam table, at the door, leaving him for good, she’d said.
Man, he’d blown it by focusing on Danny and not her. He also
suspected hers was a knee-jerk reaction, and she hadn’t meant what
she said about them calling it quits.

“What you thinking, Doc?” Grady O’Connor
asked. He seemed to be doing well in his new role as an
officer.