The Boy Who Paints Me (9 page)

“This is amazing, Leighton,” I said as I turned to face him.

“Yeah,” he nodded as he took a step closer to me.

“Want to go in?” He asked seriously.

“We can’t, we’ll get wet,” I giggled.

“So, this could be one of life’s greatest moments, Rai.
Never
pass on a great moment,” he said as he held his hand out towards me. “Come live in the moment with me,” he said as a smirk filled his face. I silently took his hand and giggled like a little girl as he began running, dragging me along with him. He let go of my hand just as we got to the edge of the water. I watched anxiously as he stepped into the water. Once he was in, he immersed his entire body in the water before jumping up and screaming at the top of his voice “woahhh!”

I started laughing as I watched how free and happy he looked. He wasn’t scared of who might see him or if anyone thought it was right or wrong; he was just living. Something I hadn’t done in a long time.

“You’re crazy,” I chuckled as our eyes met.

“I know,” he said as he held out his arms for me. I looked at his arms for a moment and began backing away. I saw the disappointment in his face as he watched me moving away from him, then before I could change my mind, I started to run. I ran full speed towards the empty water, next to him and when I hit the edge, I lifted both feet in the air and jumped. The cold water hit me instantly, and I sank almost immediately into the water. I felt so alive and so
me
. As my head came out of the water, I watched as Leighton laughed in both shock and excitement.

“Wow,” he chuckled as he made his way towards me. “That is what I call living in the moment,” he said as he walked towards me in the water. I could feel the hair stuck all over my face but I didn’t care because my eyes were focused on one thing; him. I didn’t flinch or move back when he lifted his hand out of the water and moved my hair behind my ears. Instead, I stood perfectly still just watching him and enjoying the feel of his skin against mine. He let his hand slip down the side of my body until our hands were entwined again.

“Come on, there’s more,” he said as we pushed our way through the water, towards the waterfall. “Hold your breath,” he instructed as we walked underneath it. When we came out on the other side, I wiped my face and looked up in astonishment. We were inside a cave, a beautiful cave decorated in rocks that were a beautiful golden color.

“As if this exists,” I whispered.

“Oh, it does,” he said before lifting me out of the water, onto a large smooth rock. I begin shivering slightly once my body was out of the water.

“Cold?” He asked as his hands gently rubbed my arms, causing my shivers to slowly diminish.

“Why do you hold my hand?” I asked. I don’t know why but my thoughts always seem to escape when Leighton was around.

He stared at me for a moment as though he were trying to think of the best way to word his answer. He looked into my eyes before letting out a deep sigh.

“I like the way it feels,” he finally replied, causing me to become silent. “I can stop, if you don’t like it,” he added.

“No...I do...I like it, I mean...don’t stop,” I stuttered in a quiet voice. “I like it.”

“Good,” he said as his stare became intense. The more he looked at me, the more my body began to heat up. I could feel my chest tightening and my breathing starting to hitch. Even though my hands were already wet, I knew that they were becoming clammy. Before I could even think about what I was doing, I felt my body lean towards his. I could hear his breathing quicken, and I watched as his eyes started to darken as they connected with mine. He closed his eyes for a moment before moving so close that our foreheads were touching. I gasped as I felt his hands slide gently around my waist, pulling me slowly towards him, making me want him even more than I should. He fit so perfectly between my legs as though he were designed for that purpose alone. I had no idea how he was doing this to me or why I felt this way but for the first time in my life, a man was touching me, and I wanted him to. I liked it; I liked how he felt. I felt his face getting closer to mine with every breath that he took, until I finally felt his warm breath touch my lips. I gasped, wanting – no, needing more. I tried to move closer but his hands on my waist stopped me.

“Come on, Rai. I’m taking you home,” he said before lifting me off the rock and waking me up from wherever the hell I had just been.

Chapter 5

Frustrated, was the only word that could describe how I had been feeling for the past three days. It was Monday morning, and my mind refused to forget about what happened at the waterfall. After our awkward moment, Leighton had driven me home in silence. I hadn’t known what to say or do, so I did, and said nothing. He walked me to my front door, said goodnight and that was it. I haven’t seen him since. I was tired, annoyed, and above all, confused. For the first time in my entire life, I actually wanted to be kissed. I wanted to be touched. I wanted to know what it felt like when two people wanted the same thing. It was stupid, really because I should know by now that I never get what I want. I've never been that lucky. My world doesn't include such luxuries. I guess it was a good thing that Leighton didn't kiss me because it's not as if I intend to stick around. It's not as if I have a choice. That's what I keep telling myself but it didn't make me feel any better.

Leighton had been avoiding me ever since Friday night. Three days he has been avoiding me, and each one has gone slower than the last. I watched him painting a couple of times. I watched as he drove to and from his house without even glancing at my aunt's house. I had no idea why it bothered me so much but it did. It hurt.

Megan, Layla and Caroline came to visit me on Saturday. I didn't invite them, of course but I was glad of the distraction. I had fun but my mind was still focused on feeling rejected. I think the girls sensed that something was wrong but they never asked, and I never told. Some things are better left unsaid. That was what Mitch always said. He said that secrets and emotions belonged to us because they were
ours
, and if they were ours then we had no business sharing them. Even with him gone, his rules still followed me, still controlled me.

Megan also dropped off my uniform for the diner. It consisted of a pleated, blue skirt and a tight red t-shirt with the words 'M & M' printed in the left hand corner. She explained that her dad had named the diner after her and her brother, since they were the only children he had at the time. She said that her brother's name is Michael but he has everyone call him by his middle name; Callum. Their dad decided that 'Michael & Megan's' was far too long, so they agreed on 'M & M'. 

 So, here I am, stood, staring at myself, wondering how on earth I let her talk me into doing this. I didn’t know the first thing about waitressing. The past three years didn’t give me many opportunities to test out my people skills, and the moments that did, well, I wasn’t there, not mentally anyway. I tried to ignore the negative thoughts in my mind and stay positive. I may not be able to keep this life but I can at least try and enjoy it,
can’t I?

I had thirty minutes until my shift started, and so I slipped on a pair of flat, black shoes. I showed my shoes to Megan on Saturday, and she said that they would be appropriate, since I would be on my feet all day. I took a deep breath and made my way to the front door as I prepared myself for the day ahead. As I twisted the handle, I gasped in surprise as I looked at the tall figure in front of me. This was the face that had invaded my mind all weekend. The face that frustrated me after leaving me alone with so many unanswered questions, the face that I should have been mad at. Instead, as his golden brown eyes locked with mine, I got lost in them and all feelings of anger and hurt just disappeared.
Was I going crazy?

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you,” he said as a smile slipped onto his smooth lips, lips that I almost kissed just a few days ago.
Stop it, Rainie!

“It’s ok, I just wasn’t expecting to see you,” I mumbled as I glanced down at the floor.

“It suits you.”

“Huh?”

“The color of the uniform, it suits you,” he continued with a smirk on his face that acted as an alarm clock to the butterflies in my stomach.

“Oh, thanks.”

“Nervous?” He asked as he met my eyes again.

“A little,” I admitted. I wanted to say no and put on a facade like I always did but something about Leighton makes me want to share things that I shouldn’t. I want to tell him my secrets and share my fears but I know that that is crazy. If he knew my secrets then he would never look at me the same way again, and I like the way that he looks at me.

“Don’t be, you’ll be fine,” he said as he took a step closer to me, causing my heart to skip so many beats, that I’m surprised that I’m still alive.

“Erm, I, erm, I need to go, I don’t want to be late,” I stuttered as I looked down at my shoes.

“You won’t be, I’m giving you a ride,” he replied, causing my eyes to snap back up and lock with his, “Megan said that you had a shift today so I decided that I’d take you,” he cleared up as a huge smile filled his face.

“Erm, you don’t have to do that, really.”

“I know but I want to.”

I don’t recall ever hearing about the possibility of a human hearing another human’s heart beating - without the use of equipment - but if it wasn’t possible then I think that I just made history because I was almost certain that Leighton could hear mine.

“Can I show you something before we go?” He asked, snapping me out of my thoughts. I nodded my head. I felt my body heat up with excitement as Leighton’s hand slipped into mine. I had no idea just how much I had missed it until just now.
I'm definitely going crazy
. "Come on," he said as he dragged me towards his house. He stopped at the door and turned towards me slightly, "We're going inside, ok?" He asked.

"Ok," I replied before nodding my head.

He pulled me into the brightly colored living room. "Take a seat, I'll be back in just a minute," he said before disappearing through the door. 

I walked slowly towards the navy chair that sat slightly off the wall. Its soft material brushed my bare legs as I allowed my body to sink into it. It was warm and comfortable, and reminded me of Leighton; it made me feel safe. I looked around the room and wondered what his grandmother was like. I hadn't met her once, since I had arrived here, and I wanted to know what she was like. I wanted to meet the woman that had raised Leighton.

"Ok, ready?" Leighton said, surprising me as he walked into the room, hiding something behind his back. I nodded my head as a smile slipped onto my face. My eyes widened with excitement as he revealed what he had been hiding. Without even thinking about it, I was already on my feet and walking towards him. 

"Wow," was the only word that escaped my lips.

"You like it?" He asked as he searched my eyes with his own.

"I love it."

"Good," he replied as a satisfied look filled his entire face. I could hear him but I couldn't take my eyes off the painting in front of me. 

"How long did it take?" I asked as I took a step closer to the painting, and him.

"Since we left there," he replied.

He wasn't avoiding me, he was working on this. It was breathtaking. He had painted the golden cave behind the waterfall, and he hadn't missed a detail. It was stunning and made me feel as though I was there again.

"You seemed to enjoy going here, you seemed happy. I thought that you'd like it."

"You did this for me?" I gasped as I looked at him in confusion. He nodded his head as he kept his eyes on me. In three years nobody had given me anything, not anything that I wanted anyway. I felt the tears burning at the back of my eyes. I wanted to will them away but I couldn't. I watched as he placed the painting gently down on the floor and took a step closer to me. I let my eyes close as the tips of his thumbs touched my cheeks. He stroked the tears away before pulling me into his chest.