The Boy Who Paints Me (25 page)

"Rai?" I heard him breathe so gently, making me feel guilty.

I took a deep breath and slowly looked up at him. "I lied, ok? I don't
 
love 
you. It was just a game, it's what I do, it's what girls like
me
do, and you...you're just one of the many losers that fall into the trap. Now get out...and don't come back," I tried not to cry as I saw the shocked expression fill his face. It was a lie, every last word was a lie but I needed him to go. I needed to keep them all safe, to protect them from him...from Mitch.

He looked at me one last time before I watched a single tear roll down his cheek, causing my heart to break into two. Then as though he was never even there, he left. I looked at the phone in my hand.

He's gone...for good.

Good girl. I guess I can cancel that date after all. I'll pick you up in ten, wear something pretty.

Then I broke down before remembering that life, simply just wasn't fair....

Chapter 14

It had been two long days since I told Leighton to leave me alone and, to say that it has been hard would be an understatement. I wondered whether or not I had done the right thing; whether I took it too far. The image of the single tear rolling down his cheek has been forever tattooed on my mind and in my heart. I couldn't let Mitch touch Aunt Sarah though. I didn't want him to ruin her like he did my mom and me. I have been weak for a long time. I have sat here and taken a lot of things but this time I have to be strong for the people that I love. If that means sacrificing my happiness and any possible future I could have then so be it.

Telling
Leighton that I loved him and hearing him say it out loud was by far one of the most monumental days in my life. I would probably never hear those words again but I would forever store it in my memories. I had spent the night crying, something that came naturally when Mitch was around. That's what he did...bring the heartache. He destroyed worlds and stole happiness and the worst part was that he didn't even care. He proved that when he paid me a visit last night...

I sat on the bathroom floor, frozen. I was being constantly haunted by the last look that Leighton had given me. He didn't even need to tell me that he was
heartbroken; I could feel it from across the room. His eyes told an entire story. Breaking his heart was the last thing that I wanted to do but I didn't have a choice. I needed him safe...free from my life. 

It had been ten minutes since Leighton had left. I heard the screech of his car tyre as he drove away. I never understood why the Nicholas Cage film was called 'Drive Angry' until that very moment. I felt the anger, I could hear it...I understood.
 

When I heard the front door swing open I didn't budge. I didn't flinch and fear had left my body. Maybe it left to find a new host, another home but either way it was gone. I knew it was him, I could feel it. The tears had dried from my face and the sadness had taken a vacation. I'd had enough. I was tired and mad.

"Get up," were the first words that I ignored. I could hear his ragged breath and the frustration behind his words. "I said to get up," he said slowly, dragging out every single word as though I couldn't hear him. Maybe I was crazy, maybe I had lost my mind or maybe I just realised that I had nothing to lose but I lifted my head very slowly and just looked into Mitch's eyes. I saw the shocked look pass his face for a brief second before it was quickly replaced with one that should have caused the fear to race through my blood. It didn't. "Are you deaf?" He asked angrily.

Suddenly laughter started to fill the room. It was a crazy laugh, a tired laugh and laugh that made absolutely no sense. A laugh that had somehow managed to come from me.

"Something funny?" He growled.

"Yeah, you," I breathed as I slowly stood to my feet. "It's all about control with you, isn't
it? That's what it was with my mom and now that's what it's all about with me. It makes you feel good doesn't it? Makes you feel more like a man?" I antagonized as I walked slowly toward him...all fear now gone. He looked shocked. He looked at me as though I had gone crazy. "What's the matter, Mitch? Does it make you uneasy when I'm being unpredictable mmm? You're not used to this Rainie are you? The Rainie that says yes sir, no sir is more your type isn't she? But you know what? She's dead and I'm glad. You killed her, the very minute that you stripped me of all that I had left, you killed her!"

"Wow, she finally grew a backbone," he scoffed as his eyes were filled with amusement.

"No, she finally grew up. You think that because you blackmail me that you are in control. You think that you have the power. You. Have. Nothing. I'm going to leave with you because they mean more to me but that's it. You think that I'm going to love you back, Mitch? That I'm going to enjoy being with you -"

"Shut up," he growled.

"Truth hurts doesn't it? You can take me but I'll never leave him, not truly. You think that I want him because he's your son," I laugh. I don't even recognise myself. The words that I'm saying are produced by the years of pent up anger and for some reason today, I want to say them. "I love him. It's not a fantasy or a one sided crush. He loves me and I love him in a way that I will never love you. It doesn't matter what you do to me, it will always be him. I will never look at you the way that I look at him," I watched as he breathing began speeding up. Every time you touch me my skin crawls, when he touches me I feel alive. It doesn't matter what you do, I'll always be thinking of him."

"Shut up!" He screamed before slamming me up against the wall. The pain in my head was worse than anything that I had ever felt but adrenaline kept me going; kept me alive. It didn't matter anymore. He had taken everything anyway...what was left. How could he possibly hurt me
anymore? "You think that you're strong now. You think that he loves you?" He laughed. "As soon as you leave he'll be on to the next. I'm sure that pretty little blonde will keep him preoccupied whilst you're gone. You deserve me, Rain. You're not good enough for him, you belong in my world. Do you think that he can really want you? You're used goods, Rain. Maybe he'll be ok now but what about five, ten years down the line when he looks down at you and sees a dirty, little, prostitute. Because that's what you are, aren't you? Paid to sleep with men, you think he'll still want you then, you think he'll still love you?" He laughed as he squeezed the sides of my face even tighter. "Men like him don't understand women like you. You're damaged, beyond fixing and you know that just as well as I do."

My legs were jelly and his words were ringing in my ears. I felt my chest start to tighten and my heart speed up. He was right. I was nothing more than a prostitute, only I never got paid...he did. Who could want me now...who could truly love
me? I was damaged. I felt the tears hit my hand before even realising that I was crying. My moment of strength was gone and all that it took were words. Words from a man that could break me apart with a simple sentence. Leighton deserved more...much more.

He pulled his hand off my face before bringing his mouth to my cheek. I closed my eyes as I felt his hot tongue run along my cheek, clearing a trail of tears.

"Sweet...so, so sweet," he whispered before walking away. I opened my eyes and watched his back as he walked away. My eyes found the floor, ashamed of my failed attempt at being strong. "Oh, and Rain?" He asked with his back still to me. I slowly lifted my head as I awaited his next words. He span around and the slap hit my cheek so unexpectedly that I fell to the floor. The dizziness took over and the stinging sensation felt like I had been stung by a swarm of bees.

"You ever talk to me like that again and I'll kill you," he said before turning back around and walking out the door.

I lay on the floor as I listened to him leave. As I lay there motionless my last words were, "I hope that's a promise."

My thoughts were broken as I heard a familiar voice coming from downstairs. I slipped quietly out of my room and looked over the banister.

"Hey, I've come to pick you up," Megan beamed at the bottom of the stairs.

"We all have," Caroline added as she and Layla stepped forward so that I could see them.

"Guys, I don't really feel up to it-"

"We're not taking no for an answer, so you either come down on I send Caroline up there to drag you down," Megan replied.

"And, I've seen her do it before so it's not just a threat," Layla added as she smiled at me.

I was lonely and tired of being alone in the house but I was scared. I didn't want to face the world yet. I didn't want to bump into Mitch or Leighton right now. I just wanted to hideaway from the world. The bruise on my face had faded but it was still visible. Aunt Sarah bought the whole walking into the door story but I doubt that everybody would. I knew that getting out of it wouldn't be so easy so, I finally nodded my head and headed to the bathroom to get ready.

* * *

"Well you look a hell of a lot better," Megan exclaimed as I walked down the stairs. I saw her eyes flick to the bruise on my face but she didn't mention it. I had covered it with makeup but I knew that it was still visible despite my best efforts.

"So, where are we going?" Layla asked excitedly. I wasn't sure if they were really oblivious to the fact that my life was being turned upside down or whether it was all just an act to make me feel better. Either way I was grateful.

"Shopping!"

* * *

Honestly, I felt better. I had managed to spend three hours not thinking about Leighton, Mitch or my mess of a life. According to Caroline, 'shopping was therapy for a broken heart'. If only she knew that I was dealing with so much more than just a broken heart. Either way I had a great time we walked up and down for hours. Layla has some family party tonight, so Megan and Caroline were enjoying playing dress up. Megan also made a
point of buying two tubes of lip-gloss and making it very clear which one was hers and which was Caroline’s. Somehow, I don't see it making much difference especially after seeing the mischievous glint in Caroline's eyes and Megan explained herself. 

We sat at the fountain in the mall and played 'guess that conversation'. We had to watch random couples and people walking past and guess what they were talking about. We were having a great time until we got kicked out for laughing too loud. According to the mall cop and I quote we were 'causing air pollution'. This of course made Caroline burst into a fit of laughter, causing us to be completely banned. Maybe he won't recognise us the next time that we go...who knows...

All in all the day was great but as we were heading to the diner to grab a bite to eat my stomach suddenly dropped. The realisation that I was now back where all my problems lied hit me and I suddenly felt sick.

"Hey, you ok?" Megan whispered as she pulled up at the lights.
 

I nodded my head as I tried to
avoid eye contact.

"I know that you're not. Rainie, has something happened?" She asked nervously. I shook my head before glancing at the back of the car. Caroline was sleeping, apparently shopping made her tired and Layla was singing along to the song that was blasting out of her headphones. Clearly Caroline was not a light sleeper.

"I'm fine," I Lied.

"Really? Then why are you covering the
bruise on your face with makeup?" She asked as she began driving again.

"It's nothing."

"What happened? Did your stepdad do that?" She asked as she looked at me with a sad expression on her face.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Who is he, Rainie?"

"Please, just drop it," I said as we pulled up outside of the diner. I quickly jumped out and waited as Megan woke up Caroline. After watching Megan practically pull Caroline out of her pink truck we were finally on our way.

"Sorry...about before. I shouldn't be questioning you like that," Megan said as she caught up with me.

I took a deep breath, suddenly feeling quite guilty. "No, I'm the one that should be sorry. You meant well, I'm just...tired."

As we walked into the diner the smell of food filled my nose and my belly began making a lot of crazy sounds. I hadn't even realized that I was so hungry until that very moment. You guys grab a table and I'll go and order us something." I knew that she would pick the right meal for me since I had the same thing every time that I had a break when I was working here. 

"So, are you and Leighton over then?" Caroline asked, taking me by surprise.

"Yeah, we're over," I whispered. "Why?"

"Because he just walked in with a bunch of friends...and Weasel," she grunted. I instantly turned in my seat and our eyes met. I couldn't read his emotion because I just felt empty. Yes, I had broken up with him and yes I had said some horrible things but could he really move on that quickly.

"Hey," I felt Layla grab hold of my arm. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah," I lied. Seeing Leighton laughing with Victoria as she strategically let her hand brush his arm was making my heart feel like it was being shredded into small pieces.

"We can leave if you want," Layla whispered.

"No, no, I'm fine."

"Sure?"

"Positive."

I watched as Megan walked over to use and exchanged a strange look with someone behind me. When I turned to glance at the person Leighton was the only one looking at her. I didn't understand it and right now, it was the least of my problems.