The Boredom of Haruhi Suzumiya (9 page)

East Middle School. A place I knew as Taniguchi’s and Haruhi’s old school. Speaking of which, a familiar-looking person was clinging to the school gate. I couldn’t possibly mistake the small shadow who was attempting to climb the metal gate.

“Hey.”

I began having doubts upon opening my mouth. The fact that I could recognize this person was quite a mystery, if I do say so myself. I could only see this person’s back and she was noticeably shorter. Her straight, black hair was at a length that couldn’t be classified as long or short.

Maybe it was because I couldn’t think of any other acquaintances who would be determined to climb over the school gate late at night.

“What is it?”

I was finally starting to feel like I had gone back three years in time. In fact, I actually had gone back in time.

The face that turned to look at me while she remained clinging to the gate was definitely younger than the face of the SOS Brigade chief I knew. But there was no doubt that those shining eyes belonged to Haruhi. The fact that she was haphazardly dressed in a T-shirt and shorts didn’t make any difference. At this point, three years ago, Haruhi was a first-year in middle school. Was she the one Asahina wanted me to assist?

“Who are you? A pervert? Kidnapper? Awfully suspicious.”

The hazy glow of the streetlight illuminated the surrounding area. I couldn’t read the minute expressions on her face, but the middle school first-year Haruhi was obviously glaring at me as though I was a suspicious person. Between her sneaking into school in the dead of night and my wandering around carrying
a sleeping girl on my back, which would be considered more suspicious behavior? There’s a question I don’t really want to think about.

“What are you doing here then?”

“Isn’t that obvious? I’m trespassing.”

You don’t have to announce your criminal activities to the world. There are times when you shouldn’t be aggressive.

“Perfect timing. I don’t know who you are, but if you’ve got time, give me a hand. Or I’ll call the cops.”

I should be the one calling the cops on you. Still, I made a promise with the other Asahina. But yeah, I go back in time and I still have to deal with Haruhi Suzumiya.

Haruhi hopped down from the gate and opened the padlock on the bar. “Why do you have the key?”

“I stole it when I had the chance. Piece of cake.”

That totally makes you a thief. Haruhi slowly slid the metal school gate open and beckoned me inside. I approached the girl, who stood about a head shorter than she would be in three years, and readjusted my hold on Asahina.

As soon as you passed through the main entrance to East Middle School, you would be on the school grounds and the school building was located beyond. Haruhi began walking across the dark grounds in a diagonal direction.

It’s a good thing that it’s dark. She won’t get a clear look at my face or Asahina’s this way. Certainly, Haruhi had never entertained the notion that she’d run into Asahina and me back during her first year of middle school, so we needed to keep it that way.

Haruhi headed straight toward the corner of the sports ground, leading me behind the athletic storeroom. A rusty cart, a rickety, wheeled field line marker, and a few bags of lime lay piled on the ground.

“I took this stuff out of the storeroom earlier this evening and
hid them here. Great idea, right?” Haruhi bragged as she piled bags of powder, which appeared to weigh as much as she did, onto the cart and lifted the handle. She looked like a child as she struggled to push the cart along. Guess a first-year in middle school might as well be a child.

I carefully set the slumbering Asahina against the storeroom wall. Please stay asleep for the time being.

“I’ll take care of it. Hand it over. You take the line marker,” I said.

Perhaps I shouldn’t have acted in such a cooperative way. Haruhi abused me in such a frenzy that she’d have worked a rampaging robot to the bone if she’d been given the option. Her personality hadn’t changed the least bit. I can see that her inner character didn’t mature over the next three years.

“Draw the lines exactly the way I tell you to. Yes, I’m talking to you. I have to stand a ways away to supervise your line drawing to make sure you’re doing it right. Ah, that spot’s crooked! What are you doing?!”

Her ability to scream commands at a high schooler she’d never met before made it clear that Haruhi had always been Haruhi. If this had been my first encounter with this middle school girl, I would have thought that she was genuinely dangerous.

Before I met Nagato, Asahina, and Koizumi, at least.

There were no run-ins with teachers on night watch or police cars showing up after some nearby resident called the cops. For thirty minutes, I drew white lines in every direction on the school grounds per Haruhi’s instructions.

I never would have thought that mysterious message that had suddenly appeared on the school grounds had been drawn by me.

As I stared in silence at the patterns I had painstakingly drawn,
Haruhi walked over next to me and took the field line marker from me. She proceeded to make a number of fine-tuning adjustments by adding a few lines here and there.

“Say, do you think aliens exist?”

That came out of nowhere.

“Why not?”

Nagato’s face popped into my mind.

“What about time travelers, then?”

“Well, I wouldn’t be surprised if they existed.”

I’d be considered a time traveler myself right now.

“And espers?”

“Walking all over the place, I’d guess.”

I recalled the countless number of red lights.

“Sliders?”

“I haven’t met one of those yet.”

“Hmm.”

Haruhi tossed the field line marker aside and used her shoulder to wipe the dust off her face.

“Oh, well.”

I was getting nervous. Don’t tell me that I said something wrong. Haruhi looked at me with upturned eyes.

“That’s a North High uniform, right?”

“Sure.”

“What’s your name?”

“John Smith.”

“… Are you stupid?”

“Let’s just say that it’s my desired pseudonym.”

“Who’s that girl?”

“My older sister. She suffers from an erratic sleep disorder. It’s a chronic disease. She falls asleep suddenly, so I have to carry her.”

“Hmm.”

Haruhi bit her lower lip and turned to the side with a look that said she didn’t believe me. Let’s change the subject.

“What is this supposed to be?”

“Can’t you tell? It’s a message.”

“To whom? Don’t tell me it’s to Orihime and Hikoboshi.”

Haruhi looked surprised.

“How’d you know?”

“Well, it is Tanabata. I just happen to remember someone doing something similar.”

“Huh? I’d love to meet that person. There’s someone like that at North High?”

“Sure.”

You’re the only person now and in the future who’ll ever be like that.

“Hmm. North High, huh?” Haruhi murmured as she appeared to contemplate something. After staying as silent as a rock for a period of time, she abruptly turned around.

“I’m going home. I accomplished my objective. See ya.”

And then she stomped off. She didn’t even thank me for helping her. Extremely rude behavior, but that’s what I’d expect from Haruhi. And she never told me her name either. Though that works out better for me, I’d say.

I couldn’t stay in this place forever so I attempted to wake Asahina up. This was after I’d returned the cart and lime stolen by Haruhi to the spot behind the storeroom.

The sight of Asahina sleeping like a kitten was enough to make me lose control, but I resisted those urges and lightly shook her shoulder.

“Mmm… Hmm. Huh? Wha—”

Once Asahina had opened her eyes, she began looking all around.

“Wha-Wha—!”

She stood up.

“Wh-Wh-Wh-Whe-… Where am I? What how when are we right now?!”

How am I supposed to respond? As I racked my brain for an answer, Asahina emitted a short gasp before staggering. Even in the darkness, I could tell that her face had turned pale.

Asahina began searching herself with both hands.

“My TPDD… is gone. It’s gone.”

Asahina looked like she was about to cry. Soon enough, she really was crying. She looked like a little girl as she cried with her hands to her eyes, but it appeared that this wasn’t the time to be in high spirits.

“What’s a TPDD?”

“Sniff… That would be considered classified… It’s kind of like a time machine. That’s what I used to come to this time… but I can’t find it anywhere. We can’t return to our original time without it…”

“Uh, why is it gone?”

“I don’t know… It should have been impossible to lose… Yet I lost it.”

I recalled the other Asahina touching this one’s body.

“Maybe somebody will come save us—”

“That’s impossible…” she sobbed.

Asahina began explaining as she continued to sniffle. Established events on the time plane were supposed to be predetermined, so if a TPDD were to exist, it would be on her person. The fact that it was gone would be an established event, which would mean that its “absence” had been predetermined… and yeah. I don’t get it.

“So in other words, what’s going to happen to us?”

She sobbed, “ In other words, we’re stuck. We’ll be stranded on
this time plane, three years in the past, unable to return to our original space-time.”

We’re in big trouble, was how I felt in my heart, but I didn’t feel nervous at all. The adult Asahina hadn’t given me any particular warning about this situation. She was probably the one who swiped the TPDD or whatever and created the current predicament. I presume that Asahina (Big) came to the past for that very purpose. An established event, right? From the perspective of the Asahina who came from farther in the future than this Asahina, it was predetermined.

I looked away from the sobbing Asahina to glance across the school grounds. The baffling jumble of white lines designed by Haruhi and drawn by me was sprawled across the field. The East Middle School staff and students who had no idea what had transpired would probably find this creepy when they showed up tomorrow. I’ll just have to pray that there aren’t any aliens out there who would consider this an insult… and that’s when I had a sudden revelation.

After all, it’d been dark. The only lighting in the school was provided by a few flickering streetlights and the mess of white lines had been large in scale, so I couldn’t tell what the whole thing looked like until I was a fair distance away.

Which is why it took me so long to notice.

I pulled the card Nagato had given me out of my pocket. The one with a number of unintelligible figures on it.

“There might be a way,” I said as Asahina looked at me in tears. I continued to stare at the card.

The drawings on that card were exactly the same as the ones Haruhi and I had scribbled all over the school grounds.

After leaving East Middle in a hurry, we came to a stop in front of a fancy apartment in front of the station.

“Is this… Nagato’s home?”

“Yes. I never heard any specific details about how long she’d been on Earth, but knowing her, she should have been on this world three years ago… probably.”

I pressed the button for Room 708 on the intercom at the apartment’s entrance. There was a buzzing sound to let us know somebody had picked up on the other side. I could feel the warmth of a trembling Asahina’s hand through my sleeve as I spoke into the mic.

“Is this Yuki Nagato’s residence?”

“…” was the response through the intercom.

“Ah—How should I put this…”

“…”

“Would it help if I were to say that I’m an acquaintance of Haruhi Suzumiya?”

I could feel a chilling presence on the other side of the intercom. There was a brief period of silence. Then…

“Come in.”

There was a click as the door unlocked. I got into the elevator with the nervous Asahina in tow. We rode it to the seventh floor as our destination was Room 708, the one I’d previously visited while in the future. As soon as I rang the doorbell, the door opened, albeit slowly.

Yuki Nagato stood inside. This suddenly felt surreal. Had Asahina and I actually traveled to the past?

I had to wonder because Nagato looked exactly the same. The fact that she was wearing a North High uniform, the way she impassively stared at me, and even her inorganic appearance, which seemingly had no body warmth or presence, added to the impression that she was exactly the same as the Nagato I knew. However, there was something this Nagato had that the more recent one didn’t. The glasses she had been wearing when I first met her.

The glasses Nagato had worn before she had stopped being a glasses girl at some point were sitting on this Nagato’s face.

“Yo,” I said as I raised one hand and gave a friendly smile. Nagato, as always, showed no expression on her face. Asahina was trembling as she hid behind me.

“Can we step inside?”

“…”

Nagato silently walked into the room. I took that as a yes and entered with Asahina. We took off our shoes and headed toward the living room. The room was as empty as it would be in three years. Nagato stood still, waiting for us to enter the room. I had no choice but to remain standing as I attempted to explain our situation. Where do I even begin? From the first day of school when I met Haruhi? That’ll take a while.