The Best Friend (9 page)

“So… how did he do it? How did he manage to make you, his ex, and his new wife become friends?”

Gretchen finished swallowing and lowered her drink before dabbing the corners of her mouth with her tongue. The dart of her pink tongue made his dick twitch, like a Pavlovian response. Grimacing, he turned away. He felt like a horny sixteen-year-old with her. He always had. He invariably reacted the same way to her although she never felt the same toward him. Not once. Not even one errant thought or spontaneous attraction could draw her closer to him. In all the years he’d been in and out of Gretchen’s life, she never harbored anything except sisterly, platonic love towards him.

She turned her body, so she was closer and could hear him better. “Do you know how he and Jessie met?”

He frowned.
Who cares?
“Yeah, that twisted Mexico shit. The stuff that made Will Hendricks the latest poster-boy for Army courage, integrity and honorability.”

“Yes, but do you know how he actually first found her?”

He shrugged. “Nah. Not the specifics.”

“She was tied up and being gang raped.” Tony’s eyes instantly sought out Jessie, whom he found now smiling up at Will. She threw her head back to laugh before wrapping her arms around his neck and squeezing closer to him.
No.
He didn’t know that. His stomach fairly knotted at hearing the simple sentence that contained so much horror.

“So, you see, there was never any reason for me to hate Jessie.”

“Yes, but he didn’t have to make you help him by doing whatever you did for her.”

“Perhaps. He called me because I’m a licensed therapist, Tony. I do this for living. He helped finance my degrees while I was married to him. And he called me in a panic, because at the time, he was desperate to save her. He was afraid she would end up hurting herself again. I helped him because of our history, and also because he paid for the airline ticket to get me there, he was so desperate. After I met her, and really, right from the start, my help had little to do with Will, and everything to do with humanity. Any human being with an ounce of compassion would have wanted to help her. You think you know pain? I’m sorry, but yours isn’t like Jessie’s. No one’s pain can hold a candle to her experience.”

He cleared his throat. “Oh… I guess I thought you did it purely out of your never ending devotion to him.”

She shook her head. “That was a decade ago. I moved on a long time ago, Tony. I’m really not so pathetic that I’d pine after him still. I resumed my life. And Will resumed his. Tell me, Tony, why haven’t you? Why do you care what Will and I are like together now? If Jessie doesn’t care, and trusts us being together, knowing that there’ll never be anything less than a true friendship between us, why should you care?”

He focused on the gyrating bodies to ignore her green eyes boring into him. “Because he never treated you right. I guess, I thought he was still doing it, that’s all.”

“Never treated me right? What are you talking about? Will was always good to me.”

“Will never once put you first or before whatever he preferred to do. From the start. From the first time you asked him to go to a dance, and he couldn’t because there was a football team party he didn’t want to miss. It was always about what Will wanted with you guys.”

Her body recoiled as if he tried to touch her. She shook her head. “That’s… not true.”

He felt the urge to cross his arms again; only this time, the feeling was so strong, he had to glance down to remind himself why he couldn’t. “It was true. And it’s still true. I’m sorry about Jessie. But he should have been there at least a dozen times for you like he always is for her.”

“No, Will loved me. We just grew apart as we matured. I never knew exactly why it went wrong…”

“It went wrong because he never loved you like he should have. He should have never married you. But after he did, he should have put you first, and above everything else.”

He snuck a glance her way. She was biting her lip and her eyebrows were scrunched, showing obvious distress over what he was saying.

“Did he tell you that?”

He shifted and leaned his one elbow on his knee. “No, of course not. He probably thought he
was
putting you first. He just never once treated you as well as you deserved. I never understood why you put up with it either. Sports. Friends. Army. Take your pick; they were always more important than you. Maybe because he knew you would always be there for him.”

“Are you saying he just assumed I would always be there, and consequently, did what he wanted? You think I was some kind of clinging, pathetic doormat?”

He twisted his heel on the floor and stared at it to avoid looking into her beautiful face. “No, you weren’t pathetic or clinging. His devotion to everything that came before you was.”

She was silent for a long moment. He felt her hand touching the top of his shoulder a few inches above the amputation. He flinched and jerked away from her fingers, then finally glanced up at her.

“I had no idea you thought that about us.”

“You never had any idea what I ever thought… period.”

“Why is that, Tony? Why did I never know what you thought?”

Heat was spiraling in his guts and warming his face. He never meant to have this kind of conversation with her. However, her continued politeness and courtesy toward Will was hard to swallow after all the years that Will so carelessly neglected her, not to mention how little he respected the gift of her love, which it truly was.

He focused his gaze back on Will. “Because you never wanted to know. Not really.”

She was silent again. He must have revealed too much. He turned and grabbed his drink, downing it in a quick shot.

When she spoke again, her tone was softer. “Part of it was my fault. I pressured him to marry me. He wasn’t ready. I knew that, even then. I was desperate to keep him. All the time he was gone and traveling on his missions… well, I feared our relationship couldn’t handle it. In order to keep him, I thought if we got married, we’d be insulated against the strains of hectic military life. The thing was: I was a lousy Army wife. I wasn’t committed, understanding or tolerant. If it comforts you at all, I used to chew his ass out regularly for being gone, leaving me alone, and being emotionally unavailable.”

Tony flagged the waitress and pointed at his empty drink; she nodded and headed towards the bar. “Well, I guess he wasn’t much of a husband.”

“It was mutual. A lot of it anyway. I was focused on school, and nothing came before that. There was a lot more I could have done to be a better Army wife. I didn’t want to be one, so I made sure I was a crappy one. And I made sure Will knew how much I detested the role. I wasn’t all that nice for him to live with. We were just… so young. And not ready for the marriage we tried to survive. No offense, but maybe you shouldn’t judge him so harshly. You didn’t try to get married in your early twenties and make a name for yourself in the Army. It wasn’t an easy task. And I’d appreciate very much if you tried to quit hating Will, on my behalf. If you feel the need to keep venting your hate for him, do it on your own time. You act like I was a weak, sad, little doormat, getting trampled on by Will. I was not. I am not. I was merely distracted. Busy. And into my own career. There was plenty of blame to go around; and we came to terms with it. So you really don’t need to weigh in. You weren’t there when we were alone, and therefore, you don’t know everything.”

He tipped the waitress as she set his drink on the table, having been properly chastised. Glaring into his drink, he mumbled, “Fine. Whatever. Will’s wonderful, and you got exactly what you deserved.”

She tapped her pink, polished nail on the table. He didn’t look into her face, but kept his eyes fastened on her tapping finger. She was annoyed. But that felt better than receiving pity.

“Why? Why are you like this? I didn’t do anything to you to deserve this,” she said waving her hand towards him. Sighing, she shook her head, “I don’t even know who you are anymore. This rude, latest version of you. I liked the old Tony a lot better.”

He shook his glass until he found an ice cube, whereupon he tilted the glass until it slid into his mouth. Chewing it noisily, he contemplated the crowd before him. Finally, he shrugged. “Truthfully, you never much liked the old version either, Gretchen. So just try to consider it an extension for the entire twenty years I’ve known you. Pretend I’m part of the wall again. You always did.”

He didn’t look at her, but heard the rustle of her clothes as she twitched around in obvious anger at him. “I didn’t ignore you! We were friends.
Always.
And good friends. Until now. Until you lost your arm, and along with it every ounce of the sweet, caring, fun person who I used to know and love.”

He lifted his eyes in surprise, since she rarely went on the offensive. He couldn’t think of one time he’d ever witnessed Gretchen being snarky, rude, or impudent with anyone. Even if the person deserved it. Like he did.

She suddenly slapped her hand over her mouth as her eyes widened in horror, and started shaking her head. “I didn’t mean that. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Don’t apologize. I prefer honesty to your feeble, polite bullshit.”

“It’s not bullshit. I am polite. And I always mean it. You act like I purposely try to sound trite. It’s not like that. And it’s not fake.”

No, it wasn’t. And of course, he knew that. It was part of why he always felt the need to protect her. She was too nice to everyone around her, even those who didn’t deserve it. When they were young, she was often asked to do much more than her fair share of any work, or pegged to do the chores or jobs no one else wanted, simply because she was too nice to refuse. Too genuinely kind to even stick up for herself. She never once realized how patronizing Will was to her; or how often everything else took higher priority over her. It was always about him getting his shit together, rather than doing this or that for Gretchen. She, however, never realized that Tony always had her back.

She suddenly stood up and shoved her chair behind her. “If you’ll excuse me now, I’m going to the restroom.”

She marched off into the crowd and he sighed deeply as he watched her go.

Chapter Six

Will joined Tony as Gretchen, Jessie and Vickie started dancing together with a group of smiling, happy girls. They stared at the girls for a while, nursing their drinks. Finally, Will nodded towards Gretchen and said, “Do I have to say it?”

“Say what?”

“What I should have said a decade ago. We’re over. Done. There’s nothing between us. There hasn’t been in a long time.”

His mouth went dry. “Why should I care?”

“Because you do. You always did. We both know that. We just ignored it for too long. I’m not sure what your strategy is here, being a dickhead and all isn’t the usual means to get a woman to notice you; but hell, I guess she’s here, so maybe it’s working. But whatever you’re doing, it has nothing to do with me anymore. Look, I should have said this right after she divorced me, but maybe I wasn’t ready for it. Whatever. I’m saying it now. Ask her out. You’ve wanted to for more than twenty years. You’re free and clear to do so now.”

“Screw off, Will. I wasn’t waiting for your permission. Believe it or not, the no arm-thing works in my favor. Many young, sweet girls. filled with pity, nearly fall to their knees in sympathy for me. Sympathy, which they easily confuse with sex. Watch the waitress. She hasn’t quit eyeing my sleeve since she first spotted me. She’ll invite me home tonight.”

Will fastened his glaring eyes on him. “You just won’t stop, will you? I wasn’t talking about just anyone. I don’t care what you pretend, or how you play it, you want much more than that. You want far more than to just get laid by the waitress, and we both know it. I don’t get your insistence on being such an ass, but fine, I’ll deal with it. Just know this, we are now friends, and it doesn’t matter how long you choose to punish me for Gretchen. Both for how I screwed up with her, and because you always wanted her. I suppose it’s easier to hate me in a way. I tossed away, carelessly what you most wanted. But in my defense, I was a stupid, idiotic jock, who really didn’t know any better. I never had a real relationship before Gretchen. And Gretchen never needed me. Not really. She didn’t demand very much from me. The only thing that changed my outlook was witnessing what Jessie went through. So, hell, can’t you forgive me?”

“I don’t want Gretchen.”

“You never said it out loud, but it never changed; it was always there between us.”

He stretched out his legs before him. “Okay, fine. We’re friends. Just shut the crap up with all your moaning and groaning about relationships and feelings. Did you start attending therapy with your wife? Or were you always so sensitive?”

Will laughed, and slapped his back. “You have undeniably become a complete and total jerk-off.”

Tony’s mouth finally tilted up on one side.

The girls returned to the table and it became very apparent that the drinks had worked their magic on Vickie. She was nearly falling over as she walked. Gretchen’s smile seemed less forced, but she could still walk steadily enough. She sat down with the smooth elegance that so defined who she was. Will was a fool for losing her. A fool, perhaps, that he should forgive. Maybe seeing Will more often wouldn’t be so bad. That was a contributing part to his confusion. As a friend, there was no one better than Will. No one more loyal. Or reliable. Or who always had your back. That was Will. Yet, he never proved that to Gretchen, and Tony failed to understand why.

Still, it was time to let it go. Before anyone else except Will figured out what he really felt for Gretchen all these years.

The waitress came back and delivered another drink. She stayed chatting for a while. When she left, Tony nudged Will and handed him the napkin with the girl’s phone number on it. A number he never asked for.

“No shit?” Will said, his eyes widening in surprise.

“What?” Gretchen asked, peeking across the table to see what Will was frowning over.