Authors: Leanne Davis
His mother yelled for him and he took the steps two at a time before bursting through the top, and hurrying towards the kitchen counter to find his wallet. His mother and Gretchen were chatting back and forth. Having become closer over the last few months, almost every week now, they discussed the goings on of each other. His mother’s fascination was endless when it came to hearing all about Gretchen’s practice. However, his mother did respect his privacy and never asked how it was going or if it accomplished anything. He would’ve hated to tell her the truth if she had asked, for he wouldn’t lie to her. There was no reason for her to know that the most he got accomplished was snatching a peek at Gretchen’s ass each week as a reward for time served.
He suddenly noticed the entire house had gone totally silent. He glanced up to find Gretchen and his mother staring open-mouthed at him as he grabbed his wallet.
“What?”
Gretchen visibly swallowed and slowly closed her mouth. “Yo-you look wonderful. My God…”
He glanced down at his Army full dress uniform. His pants were perfectly creased and starched; and his hat poised in perfect alignment. His only Army violation was having a ponytail. It was considered rude and disrespectful of the uniform. Tony, however, didn’t see why he should have to cut his hair over one school assembly. Neither could he justify going there without wearing his uniform to the Veterans’ Day event. Not only for himself, but in respect for so many others who went before him. His beard was trimmed for the first time in a while, and although not totally regulation, it was not as blatant as the hair.
His mother’s eyes misted up. “I haven’t seen you dressed like that since you were discharged. Oh, Tony, you look so noble. You make me so proud of you.”
Looking noble was not
being
noble. He rolled his eyes and kissed his mother’s cheek after she wrapped her arms around him in a heartfelt hug.
“I guess we should go.”
Releasing his mother, he turned and followed Gretchen to her familiar blue car. He ducked in more carefully now to avoid bumping his head, being almost too tall for the damn thing. His shoes, shined to perfection, nearly blinded him when they reflected the bright sunlight. He almost had to admit that he might’ve stood a fraction of an inch taller, in his uniform. It represented his entire life at one time. Now, as he followed Gretchen, he actually felt taller than when clad in dirty, stained, slouchy sweats and loose sweatshirts. He looked ten times the man too.
Good thing he usually didn’t give a crap.
Gretchen drove for several minutes towards Olivia’s school before she asked, “Is it hard to wear the uniform again?”
He focused his gaze straight ahead, to avoid her prying stare. “Yeah, it’s hard to wear it without an arm. I haven’t worn it since my discharge.”
She drew in a sharp breath. “You look really nice, Tony.”
“I look like every other hurt veteran you meet. Come on, I don’t even look like a damn soldier anymore.”
“Do you miss it? Being on active duty?”
He turned his head, his eyes blind to the blur of scenery passing outside. Trees and buildings meshed together as his breath came in short, sharp pants. “Yeah. I miss it. It was the only thing I ever did that had any significance or mattered a damn.”
“And now you think nothing else matters a damn. That’s why you don’t care if you do anything at all.” She didn’t say it as a question. She was concentrating on the road in front of her. It was almost like she was working out an enigma in her head.
“Thanks,
Dr. Gretchen
. I always love your breakthroughs with me.”
She sniffed, somehow finding it harder to ignore his snider comments. “Tony Lindstrom, you can be such a jerk! I think I finally kind of understand what you must be feeling.”
“Asshole is a better term. Jerk doesn’t have as much punch as asshole. That’s what you intended to do, isn’t it? Insult me? You’re really not very good at that.”
“I don’t swear much as a habit. And it’s a good thing, you know, not to be especially proficient at insulting people.”
“I know,” he chuckled finally. “You don’t do much that could be considered wrong, much less a vice. You have got to be one of the most well behaved people I’ve ever known.”
“That’s not usually considered a negative thing either.”
“Not by most, I suppose.”
“Oh, but it bothers you, doesn’t it? Believe me. I would know.”
She swung into a parking spot and her movements became jerky. He pissed her off again. Maybe someday, he could quit acting out. He was like the naughty little boy, straining to pull the little girl’s hair in front of him just for attention. He was ashamed to confess he actually wanted her negative attention because he knew he could never interact with her in any other way. Negative reinforcement was better than nothing at all.
Of course, Tony would have much preferred that she felt more inclined to screw around with him, versus wanting to save his soul by talking. Instead, he settled for a glimpse of her tits as they filled the blue blouse she wore today so elegantly. She had a really nice rack, and frowned when she noticed where his eyes were fastened. She turned her body and got out of the car, slamming the door to convey her annoyance at his unabashed ogling.
He didn’t even have the decency or grace to blush. What did he care if she caught him? He spent enough time talking and doing what
she wanted
him to do. Besides, she was about the only sexual object that could even remotely get him off. Of course, that would remain something no one ever need know or learn about. He could barely get it up anymore. And even more humiliating, he hardly cared about it anymore either.
That was what convinced his fiancée to finally dump him.
That, and she didn’t like taking care of his one-armed, lame ass.
****
Okay, Gretchen was ready to admit she’d been completely wrong about it. She almost felt compelled to call Olivia multiple times and cancel Tony’s attendance there today. She was sure he’d either be rude or simply refuse to come at the last minute.
She never expected to see him walking up and looking more familiar, like the man she once knew. The honorable, capable, industrious man she was once so fond of. Unexpectedly, her breath expelled from her lungs almost as if he just knocked a fist into her guts. His army persona nearly blew her mind. He looked amazing. Hot. Handsome. The poster boy for the Army bad-ass.
His hair gave him an unusual edge and was definitely not typical. But even so, he looked amazing. It was drawn back, either slicked with product or water, and somehow, perhaps for the first time, did not tweak around as if he slept funny on it. His hat covered most of his head and gave his ponytail more respectability. His beard was trimmed neatly. Now it flattered his face, instead of making him look like a homeless man with a hangover who lacked regular hygiene.
His brown eyes were steady and very intense, which fit the solemnity of his uniform appropriately. His good arm sported the patches and insignia of his position, and his other was pinned neatly up.
Gretchen’s heart started beating irregularly. She could not stop staring at him. And Olivia practically went crazy. Rushing from her class as she entered the gymnasium, she launched herself at him, encircling his waist with her arms and burying her face against his stomach. She looked up at him, grinning goofily. Olivia chattered on about how Tara Barton would, no doubt, be drooling because her three veterans were old and ugly, while Olivia’s was one-armed and handsome. Gretchen frowned, feeling unsure what Tara Barton’s three vets had do with anything, but Tony gave Olivia a huge smile of appreciation and leaned down to say something into her ear that soon had her laughing.
He was
so
different with Olivia. He was a fun, charming, caring man. He easily slipped into the role of protector, friend, and admirer of Olivia. It sent strange shock waves through Gretchen’s system. It was not good for Olivia to revere Tony so highly. It was no secret she never had a father, or even a father figure. There were no men in her brief life. So obviously, she would make Tony so much more than he really should have been to her. But Gretchen didn’t know how to stop it.
Neither could Tony stop it. He simply smiled and tolerated her incessant questions. She only asked about a million of them. He allowed her to hug him as often as she liked, and goofed around with her, demonstrating his one-armed abilities. Why, then, couldn’t he even say hello to Gretchen without cringing or scowling in an expression filled with fierce anger?
How would Olivia handle it when Tony finally got angry at her about something? Gretchen believed it was only a matter of time, given Tony’s personality. Or else, he’d simply disappear from Olivia’s life. Gretchen sighed, prematurely dreading the day that would happen. It was inevitable and another responsibility for her: to get Olivia through it.
Tony sat beside Olivia, and Gretchen joined the other spectators in the bleachers opposite the seating for the kids. A small representation of the high school band was also there. They began playing the national anthem and the color guard did a formal ceremony, presenting the flags. They all stood for the Pledge of Allegiance. It was a moving performance. She gasped in shock when Tony’s brother and parents suddenly showed up, all bearing smiles as they sat down beside her.
“I called them,” Leila explained. “They needed to see Tony dressed this way. And doing this… doing a favor for somebody else. It’s been so long since he’s done anything, let alone, anything worthwhile. I owe you, Gretchen. Thank you. I’m so glad you didn’t listen to me that first day and decided on your own to pursue this. Look at our son now.” Leila had tears brimming over her eyelids. She smiled with sheer, unadulterated pride at Tony.
Donny leaned in. “I knew you’d work wonders. Thank you, Gretchen. For today. Not for Tony’s sake, but my mother’s. I haven’t seen her this happy in two years.”
“Actually, it was more because of Olivia than because of me. She’s a girl I look after, and Tony has developed a strong bond with her.”
Donny squeezed her hand. “Nah. It’s because of you. You just don’t realize it.”
There were more musical performances and the principal gave a heart-wrenching speech about our heroic veterans and what an honor it is to exalt their loyalty as well as their sacrifices. Then… Tony stood up and the principal mentioned how such sacrifices could be as extreme as losing body parts, “just like Sergeant Tony Lindstrom, here.”
The entire audience erupted into loud clapping, that seemed to resonate in the gym, and the mass of bodies stood up in a collective act of praise. Tony walked up to the podium, holding a piece of paper, which he set down. Never smiling, he stared straight ahead as the auditorium reverberated with the unusually loud applause and cheers to honor him and his sacrifice. The brim of his hat kept his eyes mostly shaded, so he was very hard to read. Did the audience’s response touch him? It was a unanimous display of people who did indeed care how much he lost and sacrificed.
But wait… what was this? How could Tony be speaking here? How did this happen? When was it arranged? What could the rude, surly, miserable Tony possibly have to say to a vast group of impressionable kids, none of whom had anything to do with how he lost an arm?
Donny looked at Gretchen curiously; and Leila cried more openly as she whipped out her cell phone to take a video. Meanwhile, Lewis just stared, his eyes stricken with wonder as he slowly lifted his hand and saluted his son. The action, so small and subtle, brought a lump to Gretchen’s throat. They loved him so much. She wondered if he realized how much love and pride his family harbored for him. Why couldn’t he just gracefully appreciate it?
Then he started speaking in a voice that was deep and articulate. As always, Gretchen thought he missed his calling by not becoming a radio broadcaster instead of a soldier. He spoke so clearly and with such a deep baritone as he prepared to give his speech, it was… shocking to Gretchen. He successfully orated a wonderful perception of duty and sacrifice. He carefully explained the history of the military; and what it normally meant to the common, everyday person (or child). He spoke simply, and in terms any youngster could understand. He had most of the teachers dabbing their eyes, male and female. The entire audience exploded into such a roar of applause when he finished, no one could speak for several minutes after he sat down.
“Holy crap. Where did that come from?” Donny whispered into Gretchen’s ear.
“I don’t know,” she replied, stunned.
The assembly finally ended and the students, the audience and the guests were dismissed. Olivia was beaming and threw herself at Tony before she got back into line to go back to class.
Tony frowned as soon as he saw who else was in attendance. Donny happily acknowledged him with a thump of his fist on Tony’s back.
“That was something special, man.”
Tony shrugged. “Just pleasing Olivia.
“How did you wind up doing this?”
“She asked me to. And after the principal discovered I was a one-armed, Afghanistan vet, it turned out I was the only one. I came from a war that was a little more recent than most of the other vets. So he asked me to speak and try to make my speech relevant.”
“You were absolutely astounding. It was a beautiful speech. I never dreamed…” Gretchen started to say.
“Yeah, yeah, I was great. It was an elementary school assembly. I didn’t exactly change the world today.” Turning, he ignored her as he accepted his mother’s hug. Gretchen sighed. As always, he rarely accepted anything from her.
His parents then insisted on treating Gretchen and their two sons to an early dinner in honor of the day’s celebration. Reluctantly, Gretchen agreed even though it was not her usual time to eat. Olivia was going over to a friend’s after school, so Gretchen was free. She could tell it was near torture for Tony too. Although he could have ridden with his parents or with Donny, he slipped into her car, without a word. She narrowed her eyes at seeing his profile. If he disdained her so much, why did he choose to ride in the car with her?