The Atonement (50 page)

“
Speaking of food, I think
we should order. And I want you guys to get anything you want.
Don’t think I can’t afford it,” suggested Tamiko.

“
Yeah, but I don’t want to
take advantage of you, Miko,” said Tim.

“
It’s alright Tim, I’ve
saved my money, and I want to be able to do nice things for you,
just like you’ve always done for me,” said Tamiko.

Tim signaled for a waiter who took their
orders. Then some new performers came out to start a new set. They
listened to the music and drank the complimentary water provided
while they were waiting for their food. Tamiko’s mood began to
brighten and she was able to enjoy herself and the entertainment.
Every once in a while Tim would put his arm around her chair.
Sometimes he would lean over and comment to her about which songs
and artists he liked. Sometimes when she looked over she would
catch him observing her. Then after the set was finished the waiter
came with their food, and it wasn’t long before the conversation
started again.

“
You know you guys never
told me how you liked that play,” said Tim.

“
It was aiight. A little
slow, though,” said Riley.

“
You slept through most of
it,” said Tamiko.

“
So what’d you think of it,
Miko?” asked Tim.

“
I thought it was awesome,”
said Tamiko who was in a good mood and ready to gush “I don’t want
to tell you too much about what happens because I think you should
see it for yourself. There’s this twist at the end that you won’t
see coming at all. It will definitely make you think about what our
walk with God is really about.”

“
In that case, you’ve helped
me make up my mind. Since you’ve seen it already, I’ll probably get
one of the guys to go with me. And speaking of things to make you
think, I started reading this book the other day, called Roadblocks
on the Road to Grace, by this guy, Bishop Simmons…” said
Tim.

“
Get out! I can’t believe
this. I got you that book!” said Tamiko.

“
No way!” said
Tim.

“
Yeah. I was going to give
it to you as a gift tonight, but I guess now I don’t have
to.”

“
I guess it’s true what they
say. Great minds think alike.”

“
I guess so. I’ve read it
myself at least three times. What do you think of it?”

“
I’ve only gotten about
three-quarters of the way through, but from what I have read I’d
say it’s really good. Like chapter three when he talks about the
roadblock of compromise. It helped me to see how something that I
think is innocent, can lead to other things that can separate you
from God. The whole time I was reading it, I started to realize
that I do some of those things. It made me start taking a closer
look at my behavior and holding myself more
accountable.”

“
Chapter two really spoke to
me where he talks about the roadblock of pride. For a long time I
thought pride was just about being arrogant, but he taught me how a
lot of times fear and anxiety can be linked to pride,
too.”

“
Like the connection that he
makes with King Saul.”

“
Exactly. And did you notice
with every point he makes, he takes time to elucidate the scripture
that it’s coming from. So it’s not like he’s just giving you his
opinion on something.”

“
I don’t know about you
guys, but I’m starting to experience the roadblock of boredom,”
said Riley trying to enter the conversation. “I thought this was
supposed to be a dinner, not Sunday school.”

“
Sorry. It’s just it really
is a good book,” said Tim. “Maybe Miko can give you the extra
copy.”

“
Miko already sent me a copy
for my birthday. Not my thing. I prefer fiction,” said
Riley.

“
Oh” said Tim.

“
How does everyone like
their meal?” asked Tamiko.

“
Girl, you know I love me
some catfish, I don’t care how they do it. What ‘bout you? You ever
had catfish?” said Riley.

“
Yes, but I didn’t like it
very much,” said Tim.

“
I noticed that when ever we
go out the only seafood you ever order are lobster, shrimp, salmon
and scallops,” said Tamiko.

“
They’re the only sea food
I’ll eat. I’m not a fish fan. I can’t believe you noticed that,” he
said.

“
We’ve been friends for a
long time. How could I not? Anyway how’s your salmon?”

“
Pretty good. How’s your
pasta?”

“
Could be better. This Soul
food gnocchi is not what I expected. Usually when I order gnocchi
its white. This one’s orange and it has that white pasta sauce that
I hate.”

“
Let’s see,” said Tim
spearing one from her plate and tasting it. “It’s got ricotta and
sweet potatoes in it. And it’s got like a butter sauce on it, not
that Alfredo sauce you hate. Just try it. You might like
it”

“
I guess I could give it a
try. Riley would you like to try it, too?”

“
Sorry sister, you on yo’
own,” said Riley.

Tamiko put one in her mouth. It wasn’t long
before she grabbed her napkin and spat the half-chewed food into
it.

“
I don’t think that’s for
me,” said Tamiko.

“
Just goes to show you: the
only thing sweet potatoes belong in is pie,” said Riley.

“
I didn’t think it was so
bad. I’ve had something like this before at a soul food restaurant
in Baltimore. It’s gourmet cuisine. But not everyone has a palate
for it,” said Tim.

“
I certainly don’t,” said
Tamiko.

“
So I’ll get you something
else if you want,” said Tim.

“
No, Tim. I’ll be alright.
I’m supposed to be treating you tonight, remember?”

“
Miko, seriously, I don’t
mind.”

“
Well I would. I don’t want
you to have to pay for my mistake. Maybe Riley and I…”

“
Don’t look at me, you’re
not getting any of mine,” said Riley.

“
Then how’d you like to
switch with me? I haven’t eaten much of my salmon. You could have
the rest of it, and I’ll eat your gnocchi,” said Tim.

“
I don’t know. I don’t want
to ruin your dinner by making you eat something you don’t
want.”

“
I couldn’t enjoy my dinner
watching you starve. Anyway, it’s not that big a deal to me. The
gnocchi is just as good as the salmon.”

“
Are you absolutely
sure?”

“
Yeah, go ahead.”

“
Aww, Tim, you’re so
sweet.”

“
Sweet my foot! That’s
nasty. You gon’ eat off his plate after he put all his germs in it
with his fork and breathed over it? Yuck,” said Riley.

“
It’s okay Riley, I don’t
have cooties. I got my shots yesterday. Promise,” said
Tim.

“Actually, I have heard that people who
interact with a lot of different people and have a wider circle of
friends, get sick a lot less often than people that don’t. It’s
actually the exposure to all the germs that helps people build
their immunity,” said Tamiko.

“Nice to know I’m helping you build your
immunity,” said Tim.

“I can’t believe he said that. He’s like a
talking Ken doll,” muttered Riley under her breath.

“What was that?” asked Tamiko who gave her
cousin a very annoyed look. She had heard what Riley had said.

“Nothing important,” Riley replied.

The trio finished their dinners and stayed to
listen to the music as several more artists performed. Tim had put
his arm around her chair again and Tamiko found herself resting her
head on his shoulder. After the final performance they all decided
it was time to end their evening out and head for home. They paid
the bill and headed out to the street where they parked their
cars.

“Thank you for inviting me out. I certainly
had a wonderful time,” said Tim.

“Your welcome. I must say I enjoyed our
evening as well,” said Tamiko.

“The food was good, but the portions were too
skimpy. I’m still hungry,” said Riley.

“You’re always hungry,” said Tamiko.

“I guess I’ll bid you ladies good evening
here. I parked in the garage down the block from here,” said
Tim.

“Bye, Sno – I mean, Tim.”

“See ya around, Riley.”

“Tim, before you go. I wanted to ask you
something?”

“What is it?” he asked.

Tamiko turned to Riley and gave her, the “we
need privacy look.”

“Aiight, I got the hint. I’ll go wait in the
car,” said Riley.

Tamiko waited until she was out of sight
before she addressed Tim.

“You remember that fundraiser I told you we
were having?” she said walking up to him so that the thinning crowd
of patrons still milling about wouldn’t be able to hear their
conversation.

“You mean the Christian Singles thing?”

“Right. You see I still haven’t found anyone
to help me host it, and I was wondering if you’d like to help me.
After all, we do make a great team, don’t you think?” she said
taking his hands.

“
I do think we make a great
team and I would love to help you. If it were any other kind of
project, I would, but this – I don’t think it would be a good
idea.”

“Why not?”

“Because – it might – complicate things
between us.”

“How?” she asked.

He stepped closer to her. Now their faces
were barely inches apart.

“I don’t know how to explain this, but –
every time we’re together – It’s like – I like spending time with
you Tamiko – sometimes maybe – a little too much.”

“I like spending time with you, too, Tim. I
always have.”

“But there’s someone else who you’d probably
like a little better than me. Right?”

“Not that I can think of. To tell you the
truth, there’s no one else I’d rather be with.”

Then came what neither of them expected as
they were each drawn into the other’s magnetic pull. Their lips
met, followed by an embrace, igniting the embers of emotions they
both had long been trying to quench. Tamiko’s heart was beating
wildly and she could feel herself getting lost in the moment, and
then…Tim pulled away.

“We can’t,” he said. She could see the
anguish on his face. “I can’t do this.”

“Why not?” she asked as her heart began to
sink within her.

“It’s not that I don’t care for you, Miko. I
do – more than you can imagine, but…I won’t be the understudy for
Davis,” he said before walking away.

“Tim, wait!”

This time he didn’t stop. He didn’t turn
back.

“You were always my first choice,” she said
weakly into the night as tears spilled down her cheeks.

Forty-Seven

Callie lay in bed where she had been for the
past two days. In the aftermath of her break-up with Allen, she
tried to struggle on and trudge through her daily routines, but the
more she tried to move on the harder it was to do so. She had made
so many plans, and invested so much into her future with Allen,
that losing him made her feel that she had lost everything.

“What am I going to do now?” she asked
herself as she lay beneath her quilt, shivering from fear rather
than lack of heat. “Get a hold of yourself,” A voice told her, “You
still have a job, and you still have a place to stay. You can move
past this” The voice was right, but still it all seemed empty.
Nothing mattered if Allen wasn’t there. She didn’t care about the
job or the apartment. She just wanted Allen, back.

She got up and grabbed her cell phone from
her purse that was hanging from the foot of her bed. “It’s been
almost two weeks. Allen’s a very reasonable guy. He always gets
over things. He should be ready to talk to me by now. He has to
be,” she considered hopefully. Her hands were shaking as she
scrolled through her contacts to find his number. She dialed and
waited anxiously for him to pick up. When she heard the
pre-recorded message from his voice-mail, she threw the phone
across the room. It crashed into some bottles on her vanity sending
some of them to the floor. Then she heard the sound of wailing.

“Damn it!” she said. The last thing she
wanted was to deal with Darius. “Why couldn’t I have had a good
baby,” thought Callie. She thought Darius’s crying spells would
have stopped once he passed the six-month mark. But here he was
over a year old and he still spent a good portion of the day and
night crying – for no good reason. She could do everything she knew
how to do for him, and he’d still cry. Her frustration with him was
starting to get to her. At first, she thought about getting her
earplugs and just ignoring him, but she knew he would just get
louder and she didn’t want the neighbors knocking on her door.
Callie got up and went to the bathroom cupboard and got out the
cold medicine she had given him a while back. Then she went to the
nursery and picked up Darius from his crib. His face was contorted
in an ugly grimace. Callie was sure there was nothing wrong with
him. She took him to the rocking chair and sat him in her lap. She
pinned him against her with one arm as he squirmed and tried to
measure the medicine in the dropper with the other.

“Cut it out!” she said as she jerked Darius
by the arm and forced him back onto her lap upright after he had
almost wiggled out of position and landed on the floor. She almost
spilled what was left of the medicine as well.

When she was sure she had the right amount,
she squeezed the medicine into his mouth. He must have liked the
taste of it, because he lapped it down and was whimpering as if he
wanted more. Then she put him back down into the crib and waited
for the medicine to make him drowsy as it always did. Within ten
minutes he had quieted down, and not long after that he was asleep
again.