Tears on My Pillow 2 (13 page)

February 10
th
, 2014

Monday

Azia

                   I can’t believe these dumb ass niggas is out here whistling and shit, taking pictures with their phones and the whole nine! I put my head down, and try to walk as fast as I can to try and hurry up, and bring this long ass walk of shame to an end. I step outside and feel like God now wants to punish me too because it is pouring down raining. It is cold as hell and the wind is whipping across the parking lot like a fucking ice tornado. And to top it all off, my pussy is throbbing from Qia kicking me and the air has direct access to it being that I have no panties on. At least, the weather drives the crowd back inside.

                   I finally get close to my building and breathe a sigh of relief when I hear Calvin calling my name from somewhere behind me. 
Damn I relaxed too soon
, I comment to myself, shivering and holding my coat as close to my body as I can. I try to speed up my steps, but only manage to step wrong and twist my freakin ankle in these stupid heels. “Shit!” I screech. Calvin catches up to me just in time to grab my arm and keep me from falling.

                   “Wow! You okay?” he asks, looking into my face. “Hey what? Oooooo daaaay...yummmm, why you got that big ol knot on your head? Shiiiit, your cheeks are all bruised up. Ooooh wheee, and you got two busted ass lips! Who whooped yo ass?”

                   “Calvin, you ask too many fucking questions.” I snatch my arm away from him and attempt to take a step. When I try to put pressure on my left foot, I cry out in pain and fall flat on my ass. After Calvin finishes laughing and clowning me, he helps me up, getting a full view of my sore pussy as he does.

“C’mon, let me help yo goofy ass get home,” he says as he holds me by my arm again and walks along side of me as I hobble slowly towards my dorm. I guess he gets tired of getting drenched by this cold ass rain because, without warning, he swoops me up into his arms and carries me in the rest of the way to my dorm. I have already taken out my student ID so that I can swipe us into the building when we get to the door. Once we are inside, he carries me up the three flights of stairs up to my room. 
Damn Calvin
, I think.
Never knew you had it in you.
He is even nice enough to place me on my bed once we are in the room.

                   “So, you really not gonna tell me what happened? Apparently, you were with some punk from the way yo ass is dressed. If he did this to you, then I hope you press charges on that pussy-ass nigga.”

                   “How do you know what I’m wearing Calvin? I have a coat on.” I look at him letting my aggravation show, even though I saw him checking me out earlier.

                   “Azia, I just picked your ass up and got a handful of raw ass and pussy. So, either you have on a really short skirt with no draws or nothing but those thigh highs. So, unless you’re a kitty licker, I’mma have to say that you were with a nigga.”

                   “Mind your business, Calvin.” I wish he would go on ahead and leave. I have had enough embarrassment and drama for the day.

                   “You’re actin real ungrateful. Can I get a thank you?” he requests as he walks towards the door.

                   “Anything to get you out of here. Thanks. Bye nigga.”

                   He just shakes his head and replies before walking out the door “Wipe all that snot off your top lip.”

            I roll my eyes at his remark and slowly try to remove my shoe from my left foot, my ankle is swelling already, and wince in pain as I pull it off. I stand up and use the furniture to assist me as I hobble into the bathroom. I sit on the side of the tub and turn on the water. I take off my coat and the little bit of undergarments that I have on while waiting for the tub to fill up, throwing them on the floor.

                   I limp over to the sink so that I can look in the mirror. I can’t deny it, even if I want to, cause I look fucked up. I have a lump, the size of Mount Everest, in the middle of my forehead from that damn bitch slamming my face into the desk. I turn my face to the left and then to the right, and can make out black and blue hand prints on both sides, not to mention my swollen, busted lips. I pick up my brush off the counter and brush my hair up into a small ponytail. “Damn it,” I say, gritting my teeth because my scalp is sore from Qia fucking yanking my hair like a maniac. “Bitch, bitch, BITCH!!!!,” I scream out. God, I fucking hate her!!

     Once the water is ready, I turn it off, and I slide down into the tub and close my eyes. I can’t believe that Qia busted in Jakari’s office while we were fucking. I can understand why Qia is so upset. She is his wife and she was under the impression that she was the only one. So, I know it hurts to see her husband sliding up in someone else, especially a bitch as fine as me. And that’s the major difference between her and me.

                   I’m sitting here in this tub with a big fucking knot on my head, two busted lips and bruises on my face, and I am happy as hell. I don’t care who Jakari is out screwing, as long as at night, he comes home and lays down with me. I don’t care who is sucking his dick as long as I get to be the one living in the nice house, pregnant with his baby. I don’t care who he fucks as long as I’m taken care of.

                   Qia has the right to feel how she feels, but truly, she is tripping over the wrong things. That bitch doesn’t know how good she got it. She is the first lady, she lives in the nice house, she drives the nice car, she is taken on the lavish trips, and she is the one he wants to have his kids with. Yet, she is worried about some chicks that until recently, she knew nothing about because he treated her so well. You can’t be unhappy about things you know nothing about. Shit, she should thank him for being as discreet as he was.

                   She is just making it easier for me to slip into her place though. I already told Jakari I am fine with whatever he wants to do, especially if he does it so well that I don’t have a clue. From the way things went down today, Qia may have just bumped me from side chick to the main chick, and I am cool with that. It’s just too bad that she got there before I could get him to bust his nut inside of me.

February 10
th
, 2014

Monday

Qia

                   I don’t know how or even why, but I end up in Chandler’s driveway. Thank goodness, he is home. My clothes are soaked from the rain, and I am cold. I should have gone to Jakari’s to get some stuff but I didn’t want to chance being there and he came in. I am moving out of there as soon as possible. There is no way I can deal with looking at his cheating ass every day. I mean, hell, there is no telling what other stuff I still don’t remember or things that just haven’t surfaced yet. That motherfucker was busy as shit.

                   I open the car door and step out of the car. Normally in the pouring rain, I would run to my destination, but I am completely drained.  I so don’t give a fuck in this moment, about anything, that if me and a turtle were racing, the turtle would win by a landslide. I finally get to the door and ring the doorbell. After what seems like a decade, he opens the door. I can tell by the look on his face that he is shocked to see me at the door and I am sure my appearance has thrown him off. He stands there looking at me for a moment, so long in fact, that I wonder if he is even going to invite me in.

                   “Oh…hi, Qia. Um…what…what’s…what happened?” He begins to stutter as his eyes glide over my body and take in my miserable look.

                   I stare back at him like dude, this is not the day for you to start acting shady. Do you really think it is appropriate for me to be standing out here in the pouring fucking rain playing twenty questions? I open my mouth to speak when he all of a sudden grabs my arm and pulls me inside. “I’m sorry…I…I…uh…didn’t mean to leave you standing in the rain. I’m just shocked to see you here like this.”

                   A surge of emotions takes over my body. I cry harder than I think I have ever cried before. At this point, all I can do is cry. I can’t respond to any of his questions as I allow the day’s events to play and replay in my mind, over and over again. “Qia, what the hell is going on?! Your shaking! Come with me,” he says, grabbing my hand.

                   As we walk through the living room, he says, “Jahana, I’m sorry for the interruption. Just give me a minute, please.”

                   My head snaps up as I hear him talking. Who the freak is Jahana? I turn my head to the left and I see a woman sitting on the couch. I hate to admit it, but she is pretty. Her mahogany colored skin is smooth and flawless. She is a little on the thick side but appears to still be curvy. She has her thick Senegalese twists pulled up into a doughnut bun. Her plump lips form into a friendly toothy smile as I look at her. Her large amber colored eyes dart from me to Chandler. “Okay Chan. No problem.”

                  
Who the fuck she calling Chan
, I scream inside my head,
Bitch you ain’t
been around long enough to be calling him by his short name!
He leads me into his bathroom and turns on the shower. “I don’t know what is going on, but you go ahead and take a nice hot shower so you can warm up, and I will bring you some of my clothes to put on in a minute. You just got out of the hospital, you don’t need to go back with pneumonia.” He closes the bathroom door. I put the lid on the toilet down and sit on top of it. As upset as I am about everything that has happened with Jakari, I am amazed when I still have room to feel some type of way about that chick being in Chandler’s living room.

                   I can hear them talking but I can’t make out what they are saying, so when I hear the door open, I get up and peek out the bathroom window, which looks out into his front yard.  Damn, I must have really been in a zone because I did not see that light blue, corny ass Malibu sitting in the driveway when I pulled up. 

                   I see him walking Ms. Thickums to her car. He got the nerve to use the umbrella that I bought him last year. It is a clear bubble umbrella that I had monogrammed with his initials. I feel like going out there, snatching that fucking umbrella, and beating him with it. Why he couldn’t just let the bitch drown? 

                   He opens her car door for her. She gets in the car but he is holding the door open. I can see that his lips are moving, so he must be saying something to her. What is all the fucking conversation, Chandler? If you still had so much to say, why didn’t you do it in your dry living room? He bends down and leans in the car for a brief minute. I can’t see what happens but it sure seems like he kissed this bitch. I roll my eyes and move back from the window.

                   I come out of my thoughts and notice that I am shivering. I kick off my sneakers and then, I strip out of my clothes. The noise they make when they hit the floor gives me an idea of how wet I had really gotten. I step in the shower and let the water pour down over my head. I close my eyes and visions of Jakari plowing into Azia from behind, Kelly sucking his dick, the text messages, Azia riding his dick in the bathroom, and now Chandler kissing this broad, bounce around in my head.

                   I hear the bathroom door open, so I open my eyes. I can see Chan’s body moving past the frosted glass of the shower. “Q, I put some shorts and a t shirt on the counter for you. We can talk when you get done, okay?” I can hear the concern in his voice.

                   “Okay,” I answer back.

                   I get ready to wash when I notice that I don’t have a washcloth. “Chandler!” I yell, hoping he didn’t get too far away from the door. I am just getting ready to call his name again when I hear the door open.

                   “Did you just call me?”

                   “Yes, I need a towel and washcloth, please.”

                   “Oh damn.  I’m sorry. Give me a sec.”

                   I can see that the door is still cracked open, while he goes to get a towel and washcloth. I roll my eyes as I think if you weren’t so fucking busy being a host to that bum bitch, maybe you could have remembered something as simple as this. He returns and cracks open the shower door to hand me the washcloth. “The towel is on the counter,” he says and walks out, closing the door behind him.

                   I take his shampoo off the small shelf in the corner of the shower and use it to wash my hair. I wash myself twice and then turn off the shower water. I wring out my hair and then step out of the shower on to the black shower mat. I dry off, and then use the towel to try and get any excess moisture out of my hair. I comb through my hair with my fingers. I pull my hair up and wrap it around itself until it forms a bun on the top of my head.

                  I slip on the t shirt and basketball shorts Chandler left for me and discover that the only thing holding them up is my ass because they are too big in the waist. I hang the towel on the rack, along with my washcloth. I pick up my sneakers in my left hand.  They are so heavy from all the water that has seeped inside of them. I then pick my clothes up off the floor and exit the bathroom. I walk through the living room and the kitchen, heading to the laundry room. I stop at the back door, open it, and sit my wet shoes out on the porch. I throw my clothes in the washing machine and put it on small load with cold water. I start the machine and pour some Tide into it, then shut the lid and walk back into the kitchen.

                   I walk out the kitchen and into the living room, and damn near fall down on the couch. I am just so over today. I lie down on the couch on my side and just stare at nothing until Chandler walks in the room. “Q, what the hell is going on?”

                   “I’ll tell you in a minute. Do you mind going out to the car and getting my purse, please.”

                   “Of course not.” I hand him the keys. He grabs the umbrella and goes out to the car to get my purse.

                   When he comes back in, he hands me the keys and my purse. “Whose car is that?”

                   “It’s a rental. Give me a sec while I call my mom, okay?

                   “No problem, do you need me to step out the room?”

                   “No, you’re fine. Go ahead and sit down.” He sits down on the couch and drapes my feet over his lap. I dial my mom’s number.

                   “Hi ma,” I say as soon as she picks up.

                   “Hi Qia. What are you up to today?” she inquires, sounding so cheerful.

                   “Ma, I am divorcing Jakari.” I didn’t know how else to say it, so I just let it fall out.

                   I can hear her gasp before she speaks “What? Girl please, y’all only be married two seconds! Why?!”

                   “Well, that is two seconds too long,” I reply back. “I really don’t want to get into the specifics right now, but I won’t be staying at his house anymore, so don’t go over there looking for me, okay. I need you to tell the girls that as well, please.”

                   “Qia! What is going on baby? Where will you be staying? You can always come stay here. You hear me?”

                   My mother sounds so frantic. I hate that I had to call and ruin her cheerful mood but I just didn’t want her worrying if she or my sisters went by the house and I wasn’t there. Then, if they call my phone and I don’t answer, they would all freak out. Because, without a shadow of a doubt, I am going to be turning my phone off for a while, immediately after I get off the phone with her. “Mom, please calm down. I don’t want you to be upset or to worry. I am fine. I just didn’t want you to be worried about me if you couldn’t reach me. If I need to come stay there, I will but I need a few days to myself to figure out what I am going to do, so once I figure it out, I will call you okay?”

                   She sounds reluctant but agrees anyway. “I love you, ma.”

                   “I love you too,” she says. “Please let me know something soon, okay.”

                   “I will, ma.” I end the call before she makes me get all emotional again. I turn off my phone and then reach over and place my phone on the coffee table.

                    I turn onto my back and look at Chandler. There is nothing but shock written all over his face. “Did you just say you are divorcing my brother?” he asks with his eyes fixed on mine.

                  I nod my head up and down. I shock myself when I manage to say it without crying. “I caught Jakari fucking Azia.”

                   “Damn Q.” He shakes his head. “I knew you were on the verge of remembering everything, but why were you so upset? You were going to forgive him before you got into the accident, remember? Now you talking about divorce again?”

                   “No Chan! I caught him fucking her in his office TODAY!” I sit up on the couch as I say this. Practically yelling in his face.

                   “Today? He is still messing with that chick?” Chandler looks baffled.

                   I slowly nod my head up and down. “Yup, he had her funky ass spread out all over his desk.” 

                   “Man listen. I don’t know what the fuck is going on with my brother.”

                   “Oh really, Chan? You don’t know what is going on with Jakari?” I ask, squinting my eyes at him.

                   He raises one eyebrow before answering, “No, I really don’t.”

                   “Well, I have text messages that prove otherwise. Furthermore, why the fuck didn’t you tell me that the reason you and Azia broke up was because your brother is sleeping with her?!”

                 Chandler just stares at me with his mouth hanging open. “I thought you were my best friend, Chan! You were supposed to be trying to help me put my life back together!” I lose control and the tears start to roll down my face again.

                   “Q, I am your best friend. I just didn’t know how to tell you.”

                   “What the fuck do you mean you didn’t know how? You have had years to tell me this shit! You have known for years, fuck that, a decade plus, about his cheating ass and instead of telling me you covered for him!” At this point, I am screaming at Chandler.

                   “He’s my brother, Qia.”

                   “Oh, so what am I? Chopped fucking liver. I bet you if that was Jahana’s whack ass, you would have told her! Who the fuck is she anyway, Chan?” I fold my arms over my chest and wait for him to respond.

                   “She’s a colleague of mine. We had gone out to lunch today. Why do you seem so angry about it?” he quizzes, looking totally confused by my anger.

                   “You know what? I am a fool for even coming over here.” I hop up off the couch. “I’m leaving. I knew better than to think that I really ever meant anything to you!” I get a few steps away from him when Chan snatches me from behind. He spins me around and pulls me into him.

                   “Qia, calm down and listen to me.”

                   “Get the fuck off of me!” I scream, pushing him in his chest “You don’t fucking love me! You NEVER fucking loved me!” I punch him in the chest and he just stands there looking stunned.

                   I can tell he is at a loss for words by the look on his face. We have never gotten into an argument of this magnitude before. I attempt to turn around and walk away again, but he yanks me by my arm and flings me down on the couch. I fall backwards onto my back and start flailing my arms and legs wildly, trying to get him away from me so I can get up and get the fuck out of here. Him and his brother can kiss my fucking ass!