Taking Risks (19 page)

             
I got up for school the next day to the smell of bacon and I knew that my mom must be home. I wanted to dress cute that day to hopefully catch Risks eye in English class. I put on my favorite jeans and a gray stretch cotton t-shirt that accentuated my curves. I spent a little extra time on my makeup and straightened my wavy hair out. After I was done, I skipped downstairs to eat and see if Gray might be hanging around Mom. He was always her shadow when she was home.

             
I found Mom in a sleep shirt and shorts, so she had obviously been to bed instead of staying up all night like she usually did. When I rounded the corner to enter the kitchen I could see Gray standing against the wall with his foot propped up against it and at the table was…
Risk
! My mouth dropped open and Mom turned to greet me with a big hug. I hugged her back, but I couldn’t keep the look of shock from my face. Risk looked down at his hands with a shamed expression.

             
“What are you doing here?” I tried sounding surprised, but it sounded bitter.

             
Mom spoke up before Risk could. “Oh honey, he came to drop off your dress. It’s stunning!”

             
I took a look at Risk and he quickly spoke before I had a chance to question him. “Yeah, it’s over there. The one we picked out…remember?”

             
Instead of saying anything I followed the direction that Risk pointed into the living room and saw a gorgeous gown hanging over the back of the couch. It was canary yellow, my favorite color, and it was strapless with a few small sequins over the breast. It wasn’t poufy at the bottom like most girls wore to prom, but it hung straight down in satin material all the way to the floor. It was simple and elegant and everything I could have asked for.

             
Gray popped up beside me and said, “Do you like it?” He was smiling probably because he knew that I would.

             
“Is this what you’ve been disappearing for?” Grays face fell and he shook his head no, but before I could ask him anymore about his shenanigans Mom came up behind me. She put her hands on my shoulders and said, “He’s a keeper!” and then waltzed back into the kitchen while pulling me along behind her. I gave Risk a look of confusion and he shrugged his shoulders at me and smiled. As much as I was confused about the situation, it was also tearing me apart. Risk was putting on some show for my mother, for whatever reason, and I had to sit and act like we were the happy couple that we were a few days ago.

             
Mom never asked anything about Risks dad while we sat there eating, but I could see by the way she looked at him that she was overflowing with motherly sympathy. When we were done eating we said our goodbyes and Risk put his arm around my shoulders as we walked out to our cars. When we got outside I immediately shrugged him off of me and laid into him.

             
“What the fuck is going on Risk? Why did you buy me that dress and why does my mom think we’re still going to prom together?” He wouldn’t look me at me and his shameful expression reappeared.

             
Gray spoke up for him. “It was my idea Spud. I didn’t want your mom to be disappointed about it, and I didn’t want you to have to deal with telling her. He’s just trying to make things right.”

             
“What do you mean it was
your
idea? How exactly are the two of you communicating?”

             
Risk shot Gray a nervous glance and then said, “I can see him now Marlee. It’s the weirdest thing…”

             
That’s all he could say before my blood was boiling and I cut him off. “Holy shit! So you’ve been sneaking away so that you can hang out with
Risk
? Un
fucking
believable!” I said and slammed the door to my Delray before I sped all the way to school. I even ran down some ghosts on the way through town.

             
As soon as I got to school I was met at my locker by the notorious Jon Gillman. I tried to will myself into being invisible, but I had no such luck. He came up behind me while I was gathering my books for English class and slammed his hand on the locker next to mine, nearly making me jump out of my skin. He laughed and showed me his own bad boy smirk, but Risk and Gray had a much better version of it. We had a short stare down and then he said, “So I hear your banging the new guy. That’ too bad.” He smiled and it was creeping me out.

             
“That’s none of your business, so why don’t you throw whatever liquid you have on me already so that I can clean up and get to class. I’ve missed enough school lately.”

             
Jon let out a laugh, that sounded more like a cackle to me, and said, “You’ve got the wrong idea. I want to take you out sometime.” I saw his eyes darken and I understood exactly what his intentions were. He definitely didn’t want a date.

             
“Well thanks, but I really don’t have time to date losers that throw milk on people who have a higher IQ than them. My standards are much higher than that, so what I’m really trying to say is…no thanks.”

             
I noticed his group of jock friends behind me when they all said in unison, “OHHHHHHHHH!” I slammed my locker shut, gave Jon a triumphant smile, and turned on my heel to walk to class. I never thought that I would get the opportunity to humiliate one of those bastards like they had humiliated me all through school.

             
I got to English class and Risk still hadn’t gotten there, so my guts were in knots because I was anticipating how awkward the class was going to be. I was so ready to get the hell out of school and get to work so that I could talk with Remi and Jane about my guy problems. I needed to be alone with Risk and Gray so that I could find out why they were sneaking behind my back, but I was really just trying to avoid talking to Risk at all. My wounds were still fresh and I wasn’t ready to forgive him yet.

             
Risk walked into the classroom (without Gray) and I took a moment to admire him even though it was killing me. I noticed that his shoulders were slumped over and he looked as though he might be pouting. No matter what kind of a mood he was in, he looked incredible. He was wearing dark denim jeans and a plain white t-shirt. It was simple, but I was intoxicated by the sight of him. His green eyes didn’t seem as bright as they were while we were at my house, and there was no pep in his step as he walked past my desk to take his seat. He didn’t even bother to look at me.

             
A few minutes into class a folded up piece of paper flew over my shoulder and landed on my desk. I opened it up and read it.

Marlee,

              I hope you can forgive me for any pain that I’ve caused, but Gray and I have been talking and he helped me to realize that none of this is your fault. I know you’re caught up in this terrible chain of events along with me, and I just abandoned you. I hope that you’ll still go to prom with me, but if you don’t want to, please keep the dress. It’ll look amazing on you. I’m willing to get back to where we were if you’ll have me. You’re all I have left and I love you more than you can imagine.

              Risk

              I was having an internal battle trying to figure out if I should be dancing for joy or punching him in the face. Risk was begging for me, but it was just days after he had ripped my heart out. Was I supposed to just hope he didn’t get this kind of a mood swing again? I knew that I wanted him, but I was starting to get seriously pissed that I felt like I didn’t even have a choice in the matter. I knew that I wanted him no matter what, and I was ready for the hurt to stop. I wanted to make him sweat so I wadded up the paper and tossed it back over my shoulder, hoping it smacked him in the face. A few moments later the paper plopped back down in front of me. I opened it and found that he had added at the bottom, “check yes or no” with two boxes underneath of it for my answer. I put a check in the “yes” box but also added a doodle of a stick person with an angry looking face so that he knew I wasn’t ready to make nice yet.

             
After tossing the note back to him I heard a chuckle, but he didn’t bother me for the rest of the class. He even took his time getting his things together after the bell rang so that I could make a clean getaway. It was much less awkward and I appreciated it very much, but it irritated me that he knew so much about me already. I passed him in the hallway a few times and he would try his best to avoid eye contact with me, but I could always tell that he was holding back a smile.

             
When school was over I found Gray sitting in my car, waiting for me. I asked him if he wanted to meet up with me at Rocktop or ride with me there, but he told me that he was going to be “running errands” for a while, which I’m sure meant that he would be hanging out with Risk again. It stung to know that Risk could be stealing my life long best friend away from me. I had never been good at sharing.

             
Later that night I told Remi and Jane about the note that Risk had written. Remi was a hopeless romantic so she forgave Risk immediately, but Jane was openly bitter about the situation. She didn’t think that he should be forgiven based on the cowardly way that he ended things with me, and I told her that I was still pissed about that myself. Remi told me that it’s what I should expect from a high school relationship and that I should get over it. I had to admire her honesty, but sometimes her comments could sting a little.

             
I finished a slow night at work and then went home to get some sleep. When I arrived, Mom was awake and waiting for me. I went into the living room and sat down on the couch beside her to see what was up.

             
“Hey Mom, what are you still doing awake?”

             
“Oh, I just wanted to talk to you, honey. I feel like I haven’t seen you for weeks, and I miss you.”

             
She smiled and patted me on the shoulder and I told her that I missed her too. I knew there was more to her story than that and I felt like I was getting ready to get into trouble for something.

             
“I was thinking of next year when you go to college and about how I travel around so much, and I was wondering if you were planning on going to school around here.”

             
I hadn’t really had a lot of time to think about college, so I told her that I wasn’t sure what my plans were yet.

             
“Well honey, I’m away living in hotels most of the time, and when I
do
come home I normally have to twist corporates arm just to get the time off. I think that you should take this house while you go to college. You’re the one that keeps up with it and I’m basically just a guest here anyway. If you want to go to college around here, you’ll have a free place to stay that you can call your own.”

             
I looked at her in disbelief before I grinned wildly. “This will always be your home Mom, but I would love to have this house. I grew up here and I love this place.” Then we giggled like girls do and, like every sappy girly moment, we hugged.

             
After our moment was over, Mom and I went our separate ways so that we could get some sleep. When I got to my room I found that Gray was there waiting for me. He was looking sheepishly at the floor like he felt guilty about something. I stomped up in front of him.

             
“Look who’s decided to grace me with his presence.” My voice was oozing with sarcasm.

             
“Sorry Mar, I just have some stuff going on right now. I’ll tell you more, I promise, just not yet.”

             
I rolled my eyes at him and stomped away to the bathroom. I heard him sigh as I walked away. I brushed my teeth and put some ratty pajama bottoms on before taking a hard look at myself in the mirror. My face was thinner and I had dark circles under my eyes. My brassy waves were dull and had lost all their bounce and my skin was much paler than normal. To sum it up, I looked like hell. How was I supposed to sleep as much as I needed to while working and going to school? Not to mention I moonlighted as a ghost hunter. I knew that I needed to figure it out, and soon, or I might just shrivel up and rot.

             
I made my way back out into my bedroom and found Gray sprawled out on my bed making a puppy dog face at me. “Not fair.” I said and threw myself onto the bed beside him.

             
“Oh come on Spud, don’t be mad. I’ve missed you and I don’t want to fight.” Gray bat his eyelashes at me and I kicked him, but I smiled slightly so that he knew that I was joking. My foot passed right through his leg, but I could feel a tingle when I came into contact with him, and it was so strange.

             
As I was listening to Gray sing a Paula Abdul song my phone chirped. It was a text from Risk. “
Are you ready to talk to me yet? I feel like I should be patient because I’m the reason for all of this, but I can’t stand it. I’m going to die if you don’t start talking to me.”
I smiled to myself and I saw Gray trying to suppress a smile also as he read the message over my shoulder. I decided to give in to Risk and messaged him back.