Taking Risks (16 page)

             
I was halfway laid back in the seat and Risk had one knee propping him up while the other leg was extended to the floor. The way that we were positioned put Risks erection right in front of my face. I looked up at him and he licked his lips, making me quiver in response. I braced myself and tried to find the courage inside me for what I was about to do. I took a deep breath and then took him into my mouth.

             
It didn’t taste as bad as I had always heard, and in fact, it was empowering and erotic. He was wriggling and moaning as I bobbed my head back and forth with my hand gripped around him following my lips. Risks leaned down to slip his fingers between my thighs, and I almost couldn’t stop myself from losing it. He started circling with his thumb and dipped one finger inside of me.

             
My body was aching for him to fill me up. I tried concentrating on what I was doing to him to keep myself from going over the edge, but with every gasp and moan he made I inched closer to my release. Just as I was about to explode, the warmth from his hand was gone from my body and he pulled himself free from my mouth. I looked up into his eyes again while I wiped my mouth. Risk looked like a ravenous animal. His eyes were glowing green in the moonlight and his dark hair was a mess (well, messier than usual.) It was something that I’ll always remember, because just looking at him almost made me come.

             
Risk pulled his shirt off over his head and I followed suit. When that was done Risk reached around me and unclasped my bra with one hand while kissing and nibbling on my collar bone. I shimmied down in the seat so that we were finally horizontal and I reached between us to grab the length of him. I gave it a tight squeeze as I bit down on his shoulder and Risk moaned loudly. As soon as I let go of him he slammed into me, filling me up. I think I screamed so loud that the entire neighborhood could’ve heard me, but I didn’t even have room for thought to hope that Gray wouldn’t come see if I was okay.

             
Risk never let up on his thrusts. They were powerful and frantic with need and my body was responding. It took only a minute or two before I was clenching around him and was consumed by ecstasy, but he kept going. When I felt a second orgasm coming on I was scared that I would pass out. I suddenly felt exhausted and I was fighting to stay awake.

             
I listened to Risks breathing get heavier and I knew he was almost ready. I opened my eyes to watch him in his moment when my own orgasm had me slamming them shut again. Through my pleasure I heard Risk yell, “Holy fuck Marlee!” and the next thing I knew, my world had gone dark.

            
 
When I opened my eyes it was still dark outside. After a quick assessment of my surroundings I could tell that I was clothed in pajamas, and I was in my own bed. Every muscle in my body was screaming and my head was pounding. I felt almost too weak to lift my head, but I did just long enough to look around and find Gray. I knew he wouldn’t be far, and I’m sure he was the one that had told Risk to put the pajamas on me, because they were my favorite ones.

             
I spotted Gray sitting in the computer chair in the corner of my room and humming along to a Third Eye Blind song. When he noticed me looking around he did his ghosty vanish thing and reappeared right at my side in a flash. I was shocked to see the urgency on his face, but then I remembered my scream and thought that it was probably what his concern was about.

             
“What’s up, Gray?” I said and smiled groggily.

             
Gray sneered at me. “
What’s up?”
He hissed. “What happened to you? You’ve been out cold for an entire day! You missed school!”

             
What. The. Fuck.
I’d been asleep for an entire twenty-four hours?

             
“How did I get inside? What happened?” I hoped I hadn’t scared Mom.

             
“Risk carried you inside and he looked panicked. He was half naked and you were barely covered, but we managed to get some clothes on you. You were limp as a noodle, but your breathing was okay so he decided not to wake your mom. Risk was here for a little while, but he was acting funny. He told me to take care of you and then he took off. Your mom was already planning on letting you skip school today, but she’s been up here a few times trying to wake you up. Once you even yelled at her to go away. I think she just assumes you were up all night, but I know better Mar.”

             
He looked at me disapprovingly. “This thing with the dirty Joey kid…it’s wearing you down, isn’t it?”

             
“Gray, seriously, I just had a major nap and you’re kind of overloading my senses here.” I grabbed my head as it started to spin and fell back on my pillow.

             
Gray sighed. “Go back to sleep Spud, but we’re going to get to the bottom of this after school tomorrow. You’re not going to work tonight. Remi and Jane will understand.

             
I groggily nodded at him and started to drift away to dream land. Somewhere between my sleeping and waking I saw Gray lean down to kiss me on the forehead and I smiled at the comforting feeling of the contact, but Gray seemed to jump and that was all I remember before I was plunged into the nightmares that I thought I had escaped.

             
Little Dirty Boy, Joey, was tearing my room apart in a fit of anger. I saw him through heavy lidded eyes as he threw papers and drawers at the walls and I was unable to speak or move. My books were torn to pieces and my computer was busted. All of my clothes had been ripped to shreds and there were shards of wood that had once been my dresser and computer desk, everywhere. Joey looked over at me with his crimson eyes and started stalking over towards me. I frantically looked around for Gray, but he was nowhere to be found. Joey was only inches from my face, almost touching his nose to mine, and said, “I know you went to see him. You should’ve kept your nose out of my business, but I’m glad that you now know what hell I can bring to your life.” He smiled a very unsettling smile and then let loose a powerful wail that made me think that my ears had to be bleeding.

              I woke up from my dream gasping for air and Gray was hovering over me and screaming my name.

             
“I’m fine, it was just another nightmare.” I said trying to reassure him, though I was still trying to catch my breath.

             
Gray nodded and asked me what I had dreamt about, so I explained in detail because I knew that I wouldn’t get away with leaving anything out. After I was done with my story Gray glanced at the clock.

             
“I don’t think you need to miss another day of school, and you should probably go to work tonight too, if you’re up to it. Better get up and get ready.”

             
I moaned at the thought of having to move from my warm bed and I knew I looked exhausted. I went to the bathroom to shower and brush my teeth. After lying in bed for two days I smelled like a homeless person. After I combed through my brassy blonde waves I applied a little makeup and put on some red skinny jeans with a black shirt and flats.

             
When I was dressed for school I went downstairs to talk to Mom. I had slept through and entire day and hadn’t had the chance to talk to her and make sure that she was alright after all that had happened. When I got to the kitchen I saw that she was not the scared woman that I had put to bed with a baseball bat. She was her usual self; dressed in business attire and humming to herself while making pancakes.

             
I didn’t want to startle her so I shuffled my feet and cleared my throat to make myself known. She turned around and came to wrap her arms around me. “Are you alright, sweetheart?” She asked lovingly. I nodded and yawned in response, hoping that she wouldn’t ask me twenty questions.

             
“Are
you
okay, Mom?” I couldn’t believe that she was acting so casual.

             
“I’m fine honey. Nothing too serious happened before you and Risk came in, and I will
not
allow myself to be scared of the world. I was a bit shaken up at first, but I promise you that I’m fine. I’m more concerned about you. What happened was an accident and you did a marvelous job of protecting me. I really am proud of your bravery.” She pushed a lock of hair behind my ear. “But Mark
is
dead. It’s not something that you should be ashamed of and don’t you dare beat yourself up about it. That’s an awfully heavy weight to carry on such young shoulders.”

             
Mom was looking me in the eyes with such love and concern, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I
should
be upset about killing him, but I wasn’t at all. I had a hard time believing that would be the last I would be seeing of Mark. I smiled gently at her and assured her that I knew that it was self-defense and that I was fine. She only nodded with a look of motherly sympathy before turning back to her pancakes and telling me that she had to go to work again that afternoon.

             
After breakfast I grabbed a clean work uniform and stuffed it in my bag. I kissed Mom and hurried out of the door to get to school. As I sped through the small town streets trying to avoid the morning traffic I listened to Gray hum a song that I’m sure was from the eighties. I took a real quick look around the town at the shops and was so surprised by what I saw that I nearly crashed into another car. I was used to seeing random Lost Ones running about in the town, even the angry ones, but they generally stayed in groups and in secluded areas. That morning, however, they were crowding the streets! They were sitting next to people on park benches and walking in and out of the shops and through the cars on the streets. I slowed the Delray down to get a better look, that’s when Gray noticed all of them and his emerald eyes went wide.

             
“Wow…that’s a lot of Lost.”

             
I had kept my word and not gone back to the old town square since Gray had asked me not to, but mostly, I just got too caught up with Risk to be curious enough to go. I also had a ton of drama in my life with Risks family and I was trying to keep up on my sleep so that I wouldn’t keel over. I had to wonder what was making them stray from the square. As far as I could tell they were mostly just lost souls and not many of the angry ones were around. I figured they were all just swarming the woods behind my house.

             
Gray watched out of the car window as we passed through the town on our way to school, and I was growing more nervous by the second. There were so many Lost Ones roaming about and I couldn’t believe that they were all, at one time, probably a stone’s throw from where I slept at night. We pulled into the school parking lot and I was just about to get out of my car when Gray sighed dramatically.

             
“I have something that I need to tell you about, especially since all the weirdness in town today…”

             
“Okay…?” I knew it wasn’t going to be good news.

             
“Last night when you were falling asleep I kissed your forehead, only expecting it to be a gesture, but it was real…” His voice trailed off.

             
“I’m not following you, Gray.”

             
“I
felt
you. It was like an electric shock! It was amazing! I haven’t been able to feel anything since…forever, but now I can feel warmth from Risk and…
something
from you!

             
“
Holy shit
…I remember that!” I hadn’t thought anything about it at the time. I thought maybe it had been a dream, but it definitely didn’t register with me that it was something so epic. “Oh man Gray, I could feel you too.”

             
We sat in silence as we stared at one another in shock. I didn’t even want to think about why we could suddenly feel each other after all these years, but I knew that it probably had something to do with all of this Joey business, or maybe it was just that my gift was growing. After all, when I was younger, all I could see were colors and now those colors were people. It could also be a very,
very
bad thing too, because it meant that the angry ghosts could maybe hurt me if they got pissed enough. With the amount of them that had been running around lately, that was a scary thought to have.

             
I shook it off and decided that I didn’t want to be late to school after having already missing the day before so I wasn’t going to dwell on the subject too much until I after I had a chance to process the information. I jumped out of the car and sprinted through the front doors of the school and towards my locker. As soon as I got my combination in and opened it up, a neatly folded piece of paper fell out by my feet. I leaned down to scoop it up and unfold it. It was a note from Risk.

             
I really don’t know how to say this to you, but I just can’t be around you right now. I don’t know how to feel about the fact that you’re the reason that my dad is dead and my mom is in jail. I’m on my own now, and even though I know that you’re not actually responsible for what has happened to them, it’s because we were together that I lost them. I bring danger to you and you bring heartache to me and I think that the universe it telling us that we’re a bad idea. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but I know that it’s going to happen one way or the other. I’m truly sorry. I hope you have a happy life Marlee. I love you.

              Risk

              My heart sank as I read those words. Risk had just broken up with me and he had done so with a folded up, high school regulation note that he couldn’t even be sure that I had found. I remembered the last time I’d ever spoken to him while we were in my car, making love. He needed me so much and I gave into him even though I knew that letting him use me as a distraction was a bad idea, and it had back fired. I couldn’t stop the tears that were barreling down my cheeks so I ran to the nearest ladies room. I couldn’t stop myself from hating that the whole thing was a total high school cliché.

             
When I got to a stall I sank to my knees and let the tears fall freely. Gray put his arm around me and I flinched at the new tingling sensation that accompanied his touch, but it was the most comforting thing that I could’ve been offered at the moment. I had given myself completely to Risk and he had tossed me in the trash. When I got my sobs under control I threw my back pack over my shoulder, cleaned up the mascara residue from under my eyes and ran out of the school. If I didn’t have Risk to distract me than I would handle the things that I had been neglecting to keep myself from thinking of him.

             
I pulled into my driveway hoping that my mom had left for the airport already and wouldn’t question me about missing another day of school, or give me that disapproving look that I was all too familiar with, when I told her that my prom date had flown the coop.
Fuck! Prom is this weekend!
My inner self was slapping me in the face. It looked like I would be going dateless after all. Mom was going to be so enthused.

             
I walked into the house and yelled a big hello, but got no answer back. At least I wouldn’t have to deal with her. I kicked my flats off, put on some rain boots, and walked back out of the door to head for the old town square.

             
“What the
fuck
are you doing Marlee, you can’t go there! Things have gotten worse!” Gray pleaded, but every time he stood in my way to block my passage I just walked right through him.