Taking Chances (Blackrock Book 2) (54 page)

“Are
you telling me to break up with your brother?” I snap at him
sitting up in the chair.

“I
don’t know, it’s up to you guys but you have to admit
it’s been sketchy since you’ve been together.”

My
jaw hits the floor as I look at him; the one person who always seemed
to have my back has just plunged a knife into it. Standing I walk
into the house then out the front door and drive away. I am numb,
numb to the core at Max’s words. Walking into the apartment, I
slam the door behind me walking past Knox’s home improvement
courtesy of his fist I blast the shower to the hottest it will go and
climb into the water. Standing under the stream, I cry again allowing
myself to purge my system of pain and hurt, after my shower I walk
over to campus finding the counselors office I go inside and wait.

When
my name is called I walk like a robot into the office finding an
older lady sitting behind the desk, she looks about sixty with a kind
face and a neat grey bob rounded at chin length. Holding out her hand
she introduces herself as Dr. Jackson shaking her hand I tell her my
name.

“How
can I help you today?” she smiles at me.

“I
need to see a therapist who specializes in grief or trauma.” I
shrug not knowing what I need exactly.

Nodding
she smiles at me. “That is my job.” I like her she comes
across as friendly and understanding. I launch into my tales of woe
telling her how and why I came to live her, all about Knox and I and
the stuff I endured because we were together and finally about spring
break and Ben. She wrote about four pages of notes while I spoke and
my heart sank; she will try putting me on pills. But when I finish,
she asks me one question.

“Do
you love Knox?” I can’t help the way my face breaks into
a smile as I nod.

“Yes,
but sometimes it feels so complicated.” we talk for another
while and I agree to come back next Friday at one. Leaving the
campus, I feel a bit better having spoken about all my drama to an
impartial outsider; arriving home I clean up the mess and then get to
work on the rest of the apartment playing my running music.

By
three o’clock I am done. The place sparkles and I smile looking
around at my nice home but it’s missing something very
important. Changing my clothes, I check my phone finding about twenty
texts from Paige telling me Max and Knox are arguing and to come
back. I arrive to their dad’s house, bracing myself for battle.
Knocking on the door I wait and ring the bell. Paige opens it
grabbing me.

“Oh
my god Bailey.” Stepping inside I hear Richard tear strips off
his sons and bite my lip as I wait for him to end.

“It’s
been like that for about an hour,” she sighs rubbing her face.
“Where did you go?” she asks looking at my clothes. We
walk into the kitchen sitting down at the table.

“I
went to see a therapist.”

Her
eyes widen at me. “Really?”

I
nod and sigh, “Yeah, I needed to talk to someone and she was
nice I am going back. But what happened with the twins?”

She
Rolls her eyes and groans. “Knox heard what Max said to you
from the bathroom. I guess the window was open and he flipped out
when you left.”

My
temper flares and I march into the sitting room interrupting
Richard’s rant. Knox looks like he got beat up his hand is
swollen and his eyes are bloodshot both he and Max glare at each
other.

“Make
up you too and you,” I point to Knox, “get your shit we
are going home.” Turning I grab, Richard and hug him. “I’ll
take care of him.” He nods looking about ten years older and
smiles at me. Knox stands behind me turning I see his pain. “Babe
go.” He frowns then leaves the room Max jumps up grabbing me in
a hug.

“Thanks
sis, I knew you would get him on the right track.” Max smacks a
kiss on my lips and grins at me.

“Make
up with him Max, because you won’t be seeing him for the rest
of the day and maybe tomorrow.”

Max
thunders up the stairs and we hear a loud thump on the floor. Richard
sighs, “I swear being a father gets harder.” We both
laugh and I hug him again.

“I
am happy to adopt you.” Knox and Max walk back into the room
smiling taking Knox’s hand I wave at everyone.

“Oh
Paige, dinner on Thursday?” She nods then I leave. Once we get
home Knox smiles at me but I don’t melt.

“Babe,
we are here to talk.” He nods following me to the sitting room,
we sit for a while looking at each other searching for answers in our
eyes but finding uncertainty and pain instead.

“Babe,
I am sorry about last night. I think I may have over reacted but
seeing what I saw just shocked me to the core and it killed me.”

Knox
sighs. “I know darlin’, but I promise I never let them
in. I don’t know her or do I want to.” He fists his hands
on his knees as he looks at me.

“I
heard what happened and I want to show you this.” Opening the
picture of last night I show him, shaking his head he puts it in his
hand setting my phone down he takes deep breaths.

“It
looks bad, if it was you with a guy I would have killed him,”
he whispers, “but I swear Bailey I never touched her.”
Looking at me, I see pain on his face mirroring my own.

“I know Knox. I believe you
but it seems that someone is always getting in our way or trying to
and we fall for it all the time. If you and I are going to get
married some day then we need to trust each other and only each
other.” Shaking my head at myself.

“You
know I was never a jealous person before. I know I only dated Brad
but I really didn’t care when he talked to other chicks. With
you though, I turn into a fucking monster wanting to rip shreds off
of any girl who touches you.”

Looking
at me he smiles. “I don’t want any other chicks touching
me. You know you always told me I was too soft with other girls and
last night I realized you were right. I was raised to treat women
properly, but I am not putting you through that again. I’m
sorry I forgot dinner last night and it was my fault they were here.
We met them in town and decided to come back here. I thought if we
hung out here you would be comfortable and it would show you I love
you and no one else.”

“I
know you love me, Knox, as much as I love you but Max was right in
what he said our relationship has been crazy since we met. We have
some hurdles to jump over but I think we can manage.”

He
slides over to me pulling is wallet out of his back pocket. Taking
out my ring he looks at me. “Will you take this back?” I
slip it back on my finger smiling.

“I
need to get you a collar.”

He smirks. “Anything you
want.” Reaching out, I brush my hand through his hair, closing
his eyes he sighs.

“I’ll
wear a ring if you want me to,” he says looking at me his eyes
still bloodshot.

“I
think you need to sleep while I watch movies.” Nodding we stand
up walking to the bedroom. Knox pops another pill then crawls into
bed.

“Knox,
can I ask about the headaches.”

He
smiles “It’s just a severe migraine, if I don’t
take the medication I’ll get sick and black out then end up in
hospital.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal. Crawling onto
the bed I switch on the TV while he sleeps.

I
watch the movie Pitch Perfect and the Hunger Games. Knox is still
asleep so I go into the music room and dig through my boxes of stuff
finding some of my crafting supplies. I sit on the floor looking
through them. Grabbing three small strips of leather, I braid them
together and sneak back into the bedroom wrapping it around Knox’s
ring finger. I measure the length and cut it, grabbing the hot glue
gun I squirt some onto the leather getting some on his finger he
mumbles turning his head. Biting my lip to stop from laughing I glue
the leather together around his finger. Happy with my craftiness I
pack away my stuff and walk into the kitchen.

I
am so giggly, I have to let it out; he will laugh for sure. Pulling
out a box of cake mix and decide to make it while I wait. Getting
down to business I make cup cakes and add pink frosting for fun and
some chocolate sprinkles happy with my midday madness I lay the cup
cakes out on the counter. Turning, I scream at Knox standing there
watching me. Grabbing my chest I breathe hard.

“Jesus
babe.” Stepping over he grabs me in his arms.

“I
woke from the smell.” He smiles looking at me and then steps
back holding up his hand I laugh.

“Cool
huh.” He twists his hand looking at my project and nods.

“Very
cool darlin’. Will it stay on?”

“Probably
not but it was fun burning you with hot glue.” I smile at him
kissing his beautiful mouth,

“You
burned me?” I nod kissing his finger.

“Now
all better. How are you feeling?” I ask brushing my hand across
his forehead looking at his still red eyes.

“Fine,
hungry actually,” He untangles himself from me and searches the
fridge pulling out some burgers he sighs.

“What’s
wrong, babe?”

Shaking
his head, he kisses me. “Just tired,” I watch him make
the burgers and rub my hand over his bare back slipping under his arm
he hugs me close. “Darlin’,” he starts to say
something but changes his mind shaking his head he lets out a breath
before kissing me again.

“Lunch
or what ever time it is, is served.” We eat our food and he
keeps looking at the leather ring I made him smirking.

“You
like that?”

“Yes
I do actually. It will be better when its official, but I can wait.”
He frowns at my face.

“What?”
I smile at him.

“Nothing,
I’ll have you know that is an official ring blessed by the
crafty god’s themselves.” he grins at me.

“That
so?” Nodding I smile at him finishing my food. He watches me
move around the room with an odd look on his face.

“You
okay?” he nods then rubs his eyes. “Can you do me a favor
babe?”

His
tired eyes meet mine and nods taking the gel from the fridge I hand
it to him. He lifts my shirt. “Darlin’, shit, I’m
sorry.” Rubbing the gel into my back he curses himself. When he
is finished I turn kissing him.

“Thank
you.” Wrapping his arms around me he holds me tight.

“Bailey,
are we good? I mean are we staying together?”

“Yes
Knox, we are but we need to figure some stuff out.” He nods
resting his forehead against mine.

“You
want to go for a walk? My head is fucking killing me.” He
snorts a laugh.

“Sure.”
Knox wears a baseball cap and sunglasses, which looks really weird on
him as we walk around campus.

“So
what should we talk about?” I ask holding his hand.

“Us,
I guess,” he sighs shoving his free hand into his pocket.

“You
don’t sound like you want to talk about it.” Turning his
face to me his lips are tight.

“I
do, I just want to know if what we say will be held against the other
for ever or are we going to talk and move forward.” His words
surprise and frighten me a bit; I don’t know what he means or
what he wants to say, shaking my hand he looks at me.

“Okay,
hit me with it.”

I
smile stopping under a large tree to sit on the ground. Knox sits
first pulling me on top of his lap taking off the glasses he smiles
sadly at me. “Why do you look so sad, babe Are you about to end
our love affair?” my heart pounds as I ask.

“No
darlin’, I just want us to get back the way we were, before
spring break, before I left.” Looking away he sighs.

“Knox,
you going away didn’t change how I feel about you; it made me
miss you like crazy but I never stopped loving you, never will.”

“Bailey,
are we sabotaging our own relationship?” Resting his head on my
shoulder he raises his eyebrows.

“I
don’t think so, Knox. I have some people always talking shit
about you to me but I don’t believe it because I love you and I
know you.” He frowns at me.

“Who
talks shit about me?”

Kissing
his lips I smile. “No one important.” He gets lost in his
thoughts for a while resting his head on my shoulder with his arms
around my lower back. Lifting off his cap, I run my fingers through
his hair gently tugging at the roots letting out a heavy sigh he
pulls me closer to him.

“Where
did you go this morning?” he asks bending his head into my
neck. I feel his eyelashes tickle me as he closes his eyes.

“We
can talk later when you’re feeling better Knox.” He
shakes his head no. “Actually I came here.” Pausing, I
look around campus at the few people exploring where they will spend
the next four years.

“Why?”
His lips brush my neck when he talks.

“I
went to see a counselor.” Lifting his head, he squints at me
and shields his eyes from the evening sun.

“What
for darlin’? You know you can talk to me, right?” My lips
brush his.

“I
know babe, but I think everything has gotten on top of me, with all
this Ben stuff and Summer. I just think I’ll go see her for a
while.”

Settling
his face back into my neck he hums, “Okay, darlin’.”
A car alarm goes off making Knox’s body spasm and he groans
into my neck trying to burrow his face in further.

“Home
Knox. You need to be in bed.” Lifting his head, he puts back on
the glasses and cap then we walk home. His thumb brushes circles on
the inside of my wrist and I feel the leather on his finger pressing
into me, I thought he would have taken it off by now.

I
help him into bed only because I want to watch his beautiful body.

“Are
you coming?” he asks with a sly smile, reaching into his pocket
I pull out the medicine bottle.

“How
many are you supposed to take?” I ask reading the label.

“I
don’t know one every day or something.”

Gasping
I look at him. “Babe, you took two this morning.”
Shrugging his shoulders he pulls the covers up to his chin and buries
his head into the pillow. “Do you want some water?” He
pouts at me, and his emerald eyes, are surrounded by broken
capillaries, making him look evil instead of beautiful.