Take My Dress Off (20 page)

“She’s a very gentle horse,” I reassured. “Even Chaz has ridden her.”

“What?” laughed Sandy. “He hates horses!”

“I know. But we’ve ridden together a couple of times. He manages.”

“The things you do for love,” she smiled and shook her head, the tips of her dark hair brushing her shoulders. We walked the girls around the paddock a few times then let Dusty go back to grazing.

“What do you say to Miss Paige?” asked Sandy as I closed the gate.

“Thank you,” they both chimed. They started whispering and giggling as we walked back to the barn.

“Secrets aren’t polite,” warned Sandy.

Lauren, the more outgoing twin tugged on the sleeve of my sweater dress. “Are you
Tio’s
wife?” she giggled.

“Lauren!” cried Sandy. “I’m so sorry,” she said as she took each of their hands. I felt the blood rise to my cheeks. I knew I must have been turning as red as a beet.

“It’s okay, really,” I said. I turned to the girls. “No, I’m not his wife.”

“Not yet,” Sandy winked.

“I’m his friend.”

“We want you to be our
tia
. Then we could ride your horse all the time.”

“Lauren!” said Sandy shaking her head. “I don’t know what’s gotten into her. You never know what’s going to come out of the mouth of a five year old.”

We were almost to the house when Chaz came out onto the patio. “There you are,” he said, his voice rich with concern as he leaned in to kiss me.

“
Tio
are you going to marry Paige?” asked Lauren as she dangled from Sandy’s arm.

Chaz smiled down awkwardly at the little girl. “Maybe someday,” he sang and tickled her under her chin.

“I’m going to tell Grandma,” squealed Lauren and ran into the house, her twin trailing behind her.

I shot a fierce look to Chaz and he rolled his eyes.

“Kids,” laughed Sandy and she dashed into the house after them.

Chaz took both of my hands in his. “I need a break from here, c’mon.” We walked to the guest house. I plopped down onto the sofa and Chaz went into the kitchen. He returned with a bottle of champagne and two crystal flutes.

“Where did you get that?”

“Stole it from the kitchen last night.” He pointed the bottle away from us and twisted the top. It flew off and hit the ceiling. I let out a yelp and Chaz chuckled as he filled my glass. Then he took a few gulps from the bottle and filled his glass. He raised his glass to me.

“What are we toasting to?” I asked raising my glass.

“Getting shit-faced.”

“Is that what we’re doing?”

“Why not?” His eyes darkened as he slowly twirled the glass between his thumb and index finger. He stared as the bubbles danced and popped in the dainty crystal.

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea. I need to thank your mom and say goodbye to your family first. You’ll have to drive me home later.”

“You can stay here. Maddie won’t be back until tomorrow, right?” He tipped his glass to mine and tossed back the champagne.

“True,” I said and took a sip.

“C’mon then,” he said taking my glass and setting it on the coffee table. He took my hand and we walked back toward the house.

I thanked Chaz’s mother and said goodbye to Uncle Oscar and Uncle Victor who were reclined on the sofa watching football with Kelly and Tim. Kelly smiled at me like she knew a secret and Tim gave me a casual wave. Sandy had just finished packing up the girls’ toys and James was carrying bags of leftovers to the car.

“It was so nice to see you,” said Sandy as she leaned in to give me a hug. “Please take care of Chaz,” she whispered into my ear.

“Don’t be a stranger,” she said to Chaz and kissed him on the cheek. “I don’t get to see my baby brother enough.” James nodded to me, shook Chaz’s hand, and they gathered the girls to leave.

***

“Finally, I get you to myself,” said Chaz when we returned to the guest house. “Are you okay? My family can be annoying.”

“You have a great family, I’m jealous. I’ve only got Maddie and Dad and I don’t see him very often.” I sat down on the sofa and picked up my glass of champagne.

“A big family’s not all it’s cracked up to be, believe me…everyone making demands of you, giving their opinions. Hell, they’ve practically got us engaged.” He sat next to me and refilled my glass.

“What? That’s ridiculous,” I tipped the glass to my lips. Chaz stared at me, his eyes heavy from too much alcohol.

“You think it’s ridiculous?” He held the champagne to his lips and took a long sip.

“At our age? Yes.”

“Dad’s side of the family are very Mexican and very traditional.”

“Meaning?” This conversation was quickly taking a serious turn. I tossed back my glass of champagne and Chaz filled my glass again.

“My uncles. They expect me to take over the ranch. Quit school, settle down.”

“You’re nineteen, that’s nuts.”

“Tell me about it.” He finished the bottle and set it on the table.

“Surely your mom doesn’t feel the same way. She wants you to go to school.” I leaned back against the sofa. Champagne always made me sleepy.

“She can’t handle the ranch by herself, she’s overwhelmed. Kelly’s taken over the Hallmark store.” He ran his hands through his hair and rested them on top of his head. “My dad did everything. I helped him but I don’t know how to do it all by myself. The limes will have to be harvested in a couple of weeks and it’s a lot of work. I have term papers, finals…there’s a lot that has to be done.”

“Can’t your uncles handle the limes?”

“No, Paige,” Chaz groaned in frustration, like my suggestion was ridiculous. “Uncle Victor owns a restaurant and Uncle Oscar raises cattle, they can’t be expected to handle our ranch too.”

“So don’t pick the limes this year.”

“Jesus, Paige, it’s how we make our fucking living!” He went into the kitchen and I heard him opening cupboards. He came back with a bottle of Jack Daniels.

“I may not know about lime farming,” I began. “But I do know that drinking yourself into oblivion isn’t going to help.”

He poured the whiskey into a glass tumbler and slammed the bottle down onto the table. He’d been drinking all day, beers during football, wine at dinner, now champagne and whiskey.

“Fine.” I said rising from the sofa. I wasn’t getting into it with him when he was like this. “Get trashed. That will solve all of your problems.” I stormed into his bedroom and slammed the door. I had never seen Chaz drunk before and I didn’t like it. He was melting down right before my eyes and there was nothing I could do to help him. He was angry and wanted to take it out on someone. Unfortunately, that someone was me. To make matters worse, I was stuck here. Maybe I could ask Kelly to take me home. The room started spinning so I lied down and curled into a ball. I was just starting to doze off when I heard the door open. Chaz crawled onto the bed next to me.

“Paige?” he whispered.

“Chaz?” I whispered back.

“I’m sorry.” He slipped his arms around me. I folded my hands over his.

“I know.” I was glad my back was to him.

“I don’t mean to take it out on you, baby. I love you.” He buried his face in my hair. “Every day it’s one more thing they expect me to do. I’m drowning.” His hands reached under my sweater dress, his fingers spreading over my stomach. He began to kiss my neck and I reached up, cupping his cheek.

“I want to help you. Let me.”

“Oh God, Paige, I need you,” he shuddered. I had an uncontrollable urge to have him inside me. I rolled on top of him, straddling him as I peeled off my clothes. His hands cautiously rested on my thighs, his sea green eyes searching mine for forgiveness. I slipped out of my bra and panties, tossing them to the side as his hands covered my breasts, kneading, caressing. He knew my body so well, knew exactly what to do to drive me wild for him. I didn’t care that he had been a jerk today. I loved him anyway. I wanted to show him how much.

I tugged his belt from the loops and he kicked out of his Levis and boxers. A low growl rumbled in his chest as I settled between his legs, my hair softly dragging down his thighs. I slid my lips over his desire, my tongue gliding up and down his hard ridges. He softly moaned, his hands twisting through my hair. I tightened my fingers around his base as my tongue fluttered over the tip. I could feel him pulsing under my tongue and I wanted him to let go for me but he had other plans.

He sat up and scooted me underneath him, his body covering mine as his tongue thrust into my mouth. I moaned as he reached between my legs, delicately stroking me with his hardness, teasing and tempting as I ached with want beneath him. I reached down for him, guiding him toward me. I thought he would push my hand away, (as he usually did at this point), but he surprised me by pushing into me. I cried out, arching my back as I melted under the force of his thrusts.

“Oh baby,” he sighed. “You feel so good.” I grasped his biceps as he rocked into me, thrilled that there was no barrier between us. He reached under, grasping my ass as he sank deeper. Deep within, my belly tightened as he took me over the edge, warmth spreading through me as my thighs clenched.

“Fuck, Paige,” he called out. “I can’t…I can’t stop.” He drew me into him and became a part of me. I locked my legs around him, wanting to stay tangled with him forever. He took my mouth with force as he breathed into me, his hands cradling my face. I could still feel him inside, he was hard and warm and I couldn’t believe that I could ever feel as loved or love someone as much as I did at this moment. He rolled over, pulling me with him. I sprawled across his chest, my head tucked under his warm neck as we gave in to the after-effects of stress, alcohol, and sex.

I awakened to sunlight and the aroma of coffee. I reached up for Chaz but I was alone. I wrapped the comforter around my body and stood in the doorway. Chaz was in a black robe sitting on the floor, his long tan legs crossed at the ankles, his hands wrapped around a mug of coffee. His back leaned against the sofa, a faraway look in his eyes as he stared into the fire that blazed in the fireplace. He looked lonely and lost. I studied him, quietly observing him in his private thoughts until he noticed me. His eyes lifted to mine and I rubbed my calf with the toes of my opposite foot, nervous from his intense gaze. He offered a weak smile.

“How are you feeling?” I asked.

“Numb.”

“Want a refill?”

“Please.”

I took his mug and padded into the kitchen to get coffee for both of us. When I returned, his head was resting back on the seat of the sofa, his eyes closed. I set the mug in his hands and sat on the sofa, curling my legs under and adjusting the comforter around my body.

“You hungry?” he asked without opening his eyes. “I’m sure there’s a shit load of food in the house.”

“No, I’m still full from yesterday. Are you hungry?”

“No.” His eyes slowly opened and he watched me as I raised the coffee mug to my lips. “I’m sorry,” he said.

“For what?”

“Yesterday, last night...” He took a sip of coffee. “Drinking too much…”

“You already apologized last night, Chaz. I think I punished you enough,” I grinned.

Chaz liked to stay in control, he rarely lost it. The few times he had, he fell into self-loathing. He was so hard on himself and I hated to see him tearing himself down. He rose up and sat next to me. “I was a dick to you,” he whispered and put his arm around me.

I ran my hand through his soft golden hair, brushing it back from his forehead. “You have a lot going on. You freaked out a little bit. It happens.” I could feel him retreating back into himself, he sat straighter, stiffer, as he stared into the fire.

“We weren’t thinking last night. We were careless.” He shot a fierce look down to me. “That can’t happen again.”

“Chaz. For the millionth time, I’m not going to get pregnant.”

I pulled away from him. My mind drifted off to a place I rarely let it wander anymore, the future. I imagined myself married to Chaz, living here at the ranch, now our ranch, a blond haired boy playing in the fields, a baby girl clinging to my hip as I called Chaz and his son in for dinner, the space shuttle landing on top of us and blowing us all to smithereens.
What the hell?

I had never entertained the thought of marriage or kids or anything past graduation. In six months I was off to New York, just like Maddie had done when she was my age. That was the plan, my dream ever since I started modeling. Dreams didn’t change, did they? But could I leave Chaz for it? I placed my hand over my belly and wondered what it would feel like to have a life inside of me, a life that Chaz and I had created. My heart raced, I wasn’t supposed to be thinking these kinds of thoughts. Was my biological clock ticking already? Oh God, how do I make it stop?

“You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Chaz snapped me out of my thoughts. “Just thinking, about the future I guess.”

“Is your future that scary?” He took my empty mug and set it on the coffee table.

I shook my head. “Crazy thoughts. I think I’m still drunk.”