Take it All (Blinded by Love) (27 page)

Lennox listened as she heard Emerson leave the room and then a few seconds later a door closed. Caleb’s hand flattened against her cheek and she turned into his touch as her eyes fluttered open and she saw him sitting close to her, watching her. His normally bright azure eyes had lost a bit of light and were bigger than normal. The features of his face were soft but his half was being forced. “Hi,” she said, her voice thick with sleep as she stared back at him, suddenly feeling anxious butterflies in her stomach.

“Hey.” He looked down at her, uncertainty swimming across his face and in his eyes, not knowing where to begin or what to say to her. He knew she was upset, he could see it in her eyes; the hurt and confusion crashing into one another like two tidal waves. “Listen, um, about last–”

“Caleb,” she began, raising her hand to stop him as she pushed herself up on the couch, “I think we really need to talk.”

He nodded his head, agreeing. “Let’s go to my room, more privacy there,” he motioned then stood up, holding his hand out for her to take.

Lennox placed her hand in his and he pulled her up off the couch to a standing position. Then, holding her hand tight like she was going to run away, he started down the hall towards his room. Once in his room, she let go of his hand and walked across the room, stopping a couple feet away from him and started undoing the buttons of her coat, biting her lip nervously. Caleb closed the door and turned around, running his hand through his messy, tussled hair.

“Where were you?” he asked, almost accusingly.

Lennox took a step back and looked at him, her head slightly tilted to the side, “Excuse me– wait,” her hand came out in front of her like she was telling him to stop, “You’re not seriously mad at me,” she stated, her eyes opening and narrowing at him while her hands went to her hips.

“I was worried about you. You just took off last night, I didn’t know who you were with or where you went and you didn’t call me back–”

“I was fine; hurt and upset, but I was fine. I was with a friend who took care of me,” she said sharply.

Caleb then looked down at the clothes she was wearing, the same clothes from the night before, “You didn’t go home,” he motioned to her open coat with a flick of his hand.

She crossed her arms over her chest tightly as she looked around his room, avoiding his gaze, “No, I didn’t and my bag was in your car so I had nothing to change into this morning,” she said matter-of-factly.

“Where’d you stay then?”

“What does it matter?” she shot back.

“It doesn’t, but I’d kinda like to know where my girlfriend was last night after she took off in a car I’d never seen before,” he said, his tone was firm as he slid of his leather jacket and tossed it across the room where it landed on a pile of clothes.

“I was with Raine; I stayed with him last night.”

Lennox watched as Caleb’s jaw clenched and his face turned to stone. His eyes darkened, swimming with fury and jealousy. “You stayed at Raine’s.”

“Yeah,” she said, shrugging her shoulders like it wasn’t a big deal.

“Yeah,” he mocked, “Why?”

“Why what?”

“Why’d you stay with him, Lennox?”

She saw the unasked question in his eye and she reeled back, “Why don’t you ask what you’re really thinking.”

“Fine, you sleep with him?”

Her teeth clenched as she felt the anger begin to boil inside her. She had come back because she felt guilty for taking off and making him worry when she didn’t tell him she was okay. She wanted to talk things out so they could move forward, but standing there with him, looking as mad as he did, thinking what he thought, she couldn’t help but feel happy that he was squirming, thinking the worst when she told him she stayed with Raine. But she also felt pissed off that he would actually question her on that or think that she would do that to him, regardless of anything going on.

“Are you
fucking
kidding me, you’re really asking me that–”

“Lox–”

“No Caleb, you think after what I saw last night that I called Raine to pick me up just so I could hop into bed with him because what, I wanted to hurt you back?”

“Lennox, no.”

“You lied to me, Caleb. You told me it was just dope; it’s not, its cocaine too,
cocaine
Caleb.”

“Technically, I didn’t.”

She looked at him confused, and asked, “What?”

“Well, dope
is
just another word for drugs,” he said, sheepishly, his lips twitching.

Lennox looked at him dumb-founded, “Sure, make fun of me for not being up to date on what the lingo is for drugs these days!” she exclaimed. “What, you hoping it would give you an out for lying to me?”

“No, I was just being a smartass, sorry.”

“This whole time... you probably thought I was such an idiot for not knowing the difference and didn’t feel bad about anything at all.” Lennox looked at him, shaking her head, the anger inside settling as she felt more embarrassed than anything.

“Lennox, that’s not true. You’ll never know how much it killed me to hide it from you, to lie to you,” he said firmly. She could hear the honesty in his voice. He no longer looked upset but exhausted.

“Then why not tell me, Caleb?”

He sighed, “Lennox, it’s complicated, alright?”

“No, not alright, the least you could do is
try
and explain it to me.”

“First, why don’t you explain last night and Raine to me,” he challenged.

She blinked, shaking her head in disbelief, “You’re unbelievable you know that.” Her words were full of frustration and annoyance.

“I just wanna know–”

“If I went back to his place and screwed his brains out,” she began, glaring at him, “yeah, I got that. You know Caleb, you should be
thanking
him, not looking like you wanna kill him.”

“Yeah and why’s that?”

“Because,” she took a deep breath then exhaled, “Raine’s one of the reason’s I’m not breaking up with you, or I should say one of the reasons I wasn’t going to end things,” she blurted out, her eyes burning with unshed tears.

Caleb’s eyes flashed with pain then confusion as his face fell and slightly paled, “What do you mean?”

Lennox crossed her arms over her chest and breathed out, hoping her voice held strong and the tears stayed at bay. “Contrary to what you believe, I stayed with Raine last night because I knew he would give me what I needed and that Caleb Kingston, wasn’t me screwing him to get back at you,” her vision blurred and she felt the warm tears fall down her cheeks before she swiped at them.

“Len–”

“No, you can listen. I needed space and time to sort shit out, especially after... well you know, and he gave me that no questions asked. I realized I was more upset over the lie than the fucking cocaine and I was sure I was crazy that something was wrong with me because I mean, who’s okay with their boyfriend using cocaine!” she exclaimed angrily, brushing away the tears as she shook her head, laughing bitterly. “But he helped me see I’m not crazy.” She sniffled, avoiding the look he was giving her.

“I’m sorry, I–”

“You know,” she cut him, her voice soft and tired, “he asked me this question and I didn’t even hesitate with my answer.”

“What was the question?” he asked, taking a step into the room, closer to her.

“He asked me,” she began, pausing and looking him dead in the eye, “if you would have told me the truth in the beginning, would I have stayed with you?”

Caleb took another step towards her, his eyes not leaving hers as he looked at her anxiously and full of anticipation. “What was your answer?”

“Yes.”

He froze and looked at her in disbelief, “Why?”

“Because it’s you,” her fingers brushed the last few tears away, “and…”

His head tipped to the side, “And?” he urged softly, taking another step towards her.

“I’m too far gone to walk away from you,” she said softly, her heart racing in her chest as her stomach tightened with anxiety. “I’m crazy in love with you, Caleb. I have been since I was a little girl.” She shrugged her shoulders, “I love you, so much so that it hurts to breathe or be away from you.”

Caleb didn’t say anything. Instead he walked to the other side of his room and opened his laptop that was sitting on a small table by his bed and turned it on. Lennox, watching in confusion at what he was doing decided she didn’t want to be there, not after she just bared her soul to him and he walked away without a second thought. As she headed for the door she heard it, the heavy loud picking of an acoustic guitar filling the room with music, and she came to a halt a few steps away from the door, turning slowly as the rich growly voice started to sing. It was her favorite song; the one Caleb had searched for and downloaded after she told him how much she loved it and the way it made her feel.

She watched as Caleb walked over to her, his face unreadable, and her stomach started to flip and twist afraid of what he was going to say. “Lennox,” he said softly over the music, as he stood in front of her reaching up and brushing a piece of her hair back and tucking it behind her ear.

“Caleb, its okay if–”

“No, just listen,” he told her, stopping her from saying anymore by placing his right index finger over her soft, warm lips. The corner of his lips pulled into a half smile as he felt her lips twitch under his touch.

“But,” she began to mumble but went silent when he gave her a pointed look.

“Your blonde ringlets were bouncing around as you skipped towards me and you wore that um... that purple polka dot dress with your purple chucks; still never seen anyone wear so much purple,” he recalled, memorizing every inch of her face before looking deep into her gold, glistening eyes. “Fuck, that smile of yours, it’s still the best smile I’ve ever seen; beautiful and earth shattering. That day, Lox, you looked at me like I was worthy, worthy enough for you. You gave me that same smile in the cafe weeks ago and it’s still there, coming just as effortlessly,” his voice finished on a whisper as he reached up and smoothed his thumb across her cheek, brushing away the fallen tears. “Been in love with you from the moment you skipped into my world, Lox.”

Lennox looked at him in awe as she never would have thought he’d remember all that, especially not what she wore that day and that alone was worth so much more. She also knew there was no faking that moment between them as she had watched through his eyes as he relieved the memory. She knew it was worth something to him, just as he had told her on Valentine’s Day that he remembered things that he didn’t want to forget, things that were important to him and she couldn’t help the small smile that pulled on her lips as she realized how important she was to him.

“You called me Lox that day. It was the first nick name I ever had,” she paused, stepping into him their bodies almost touching, “the best one I ever had,” she whispered.

Caleb’s hands took her coat and slowly pushed it off her shoulders, letting it fall to the ground behind her. Her head tilted to the side moving into his touch as his hand smoothed across her cheek, his thumb moving back and forth in its place. Her eyes were about to flutter shut when he gently brought her head up and pulled her into him.

Lennox’s arms gripped his hard biceps as his head dipped forward and his soft warm lips brushed over hers. Caleb’s arms hooked around her waist tightly as their mouths moved together before he swiped his tongue over her bottom lip and their tongues began dancing. Lennox looped her arms around his neck when he started moving backwards, pulling her with him in the direction of the bed. She went willingly, knowing exactly what was going to happen.

Pulling away from her, Caleb broke the kiss and his hands lifted the hem of her shirt up and over her head then tossed it to the side where it landed softly on his floor. Lennox then slipped her hands under his shirt, her fingers gently grazing his chest and momentarily lingering against his hot skin. She then gripped the hem and lifted it up and over his head with some help then tossed it to the side with hers. His hand shot out, a finger hooked in one of her belt loops and he pulled her to him, their bare chests meeting and creating electric sparks that covered their bodies in a hot fiery flame.

Lennox reached for his belt, only to struggle getting it undone. Caleb chuckled watching her, “Need a hand?”

She nodded, also laughing, and said, “Please.”

As he was undoing his belt, Lennox was working on his button and zipper. In no time, everything was undone and his jeans fell to the floor in a pile around his feet. Caleb gripped her hips and pulled her swiftly into his body before his lips claimed hers hungrily then turned her and laid her on his bed. Tearing his lips away from her mouth he trailed wet kisses across her cheek, making his way down her neck, leaving a trail of hot spots in their wake. His lips moved softly over her collarbone then down over her chest, leaving a trail of butterfly kisses down over her stomach and around her belly button. As his lips lingered around her belly button, his hand reached up and pulled the strap of her bra down. His mouth moved lower until it found the top of her jeans. He looked up at her to see her head lifted up, watching everything he did. He grinned at her before his mouth found the snap on her jeans and undid it with his teeth. Caleb stood and pulled her jeans off in one swift movement then threw them over his shoulder where they landed with their other clothing.

Lennox sat up, her eyes shining up at Caleb as her fingers hooked on both sides of his briefs then slid them down until they hit the floor. Caleb bent forward, his lips crashing down on hers as she leaned back allowing him to cover her body with his. As their lips moved together, she could feel him throbbing between her legs against the one spot she wanted him the most. The want she felt pulled at her as the intense fire burned in her stomach; her hands dove into his hair as he kissed down the other side of her neck and shoulder. His hand slid behind her back, undoing the clasps of her bra then pulling the straps down until she pulled her arms out and he removed her bra, throwing it aside. His mouth found hers again as she planted her foot on the bed a second before she wrapped her leg around his waist, a moan vibrating against his lips at feeling him twitch against her.