Swept (12 page)

“Oh Ryan,” I say and burst into tears, my mind is a swirl of so many emotions I can’t even being to go through them all.

“Did I do something wrong?” He asks confused.

“No.” I manage thickly; I can’t believe I’m crying again. “I just have so much going on; between school, Gabriel, my mother, and now this?” I sob.

“Gabriel? Did he hurt you?”

“No.” I shake my head. “It’s complicated.”

“Is your mother okay?”

“She’s fine, I just miss her.”

“Then what’s wrong?” He asks.

“I’m overwhelmed.”

“This is not what I imagined your reaction to be at all.” Ryan mutters shaking his head.

“I’m sorry Ryan; you just caught me at a bad time. Can you give me a while to think about it all?”

His face drops, “That’s it then? You don’t care?”

“Ryan, I don’t know how I feel. I have so many emotions to wade through right now. I just need some time to think, okay?”

“Take all the time you need, just promise me that you’ll give me a chance.

“Okay, I’ll call you; just give me a little time.”

“Okay.” He says and leaves.

What am I going to do now? Ryan loves me? He’s in love with me? How did I not know that? This whole time we’ve known each other and I was clueless. I care about Gabriel, I’m swept away by him, but now I just don’t know. How am I supposed to react? What happens if I turn Ryan away? Will I lose him forever? He’s been my friend for so long and He’s been there for me. We’ve shared so much over the years and he’s always been easy to talk to. He’s the glue between me and Kelly. How did he keep his feelings hidden for so long? My mind whirls as I process everything Ryan just said to me. Then the question presents itself, how do I feel about Ryan?

Gabriel

Chapter Sixteen

Caden

I
let the water run down my body as I think about the past couple of days. So much has happened and my head is spinning. After my classes ended, before I saw Emily I got a call from Caden’s mother; He was fine, his arm was in a cast and it was going to take a few weeks to heal. It didn’t need surgery; it was a nice clean break. The doctor limited his activity, no skate boarding or other sports until his arm is healed which is fine. I have other plans for Caden.

I updated my blog and wrote about sports and injuries. I’ve had plenty of my own. I also started a fund raiser; I want to renovate an abandon building and turn it into a local hang out for the kids. I have a place picked out in a neighborhood that could use a facility like the one I have planned. I have big dreams for it. I want it to grow and I want the kids to be able to go on trips and maybe even sky dive; if their parents will allow it. I think it’s important for kids to have stuff to do and I’m confident that I can make this happen. People are already donating money; if it keeps up I’ll be starting work on the facility soon. Stuff like this restores my faith in humanity. I find it humbling and amazing that people are taking the time to care about their community.

After I updated my blog I went to see Emily. She greeted me at the door without her shirt. We had just started kissing, when Crystal walked in. Crystal; I smile to myself, she was shocked, but I noticed her checking me out. I stared at her mouth wondering what it would feel like to have her lips wrapped around my dick. Unfortunately, the situation escalated quickly and ended in a way I never could have imagined. The threesome with Emily and Crystal was hot. I never expected Crystal to handle it the way she did after her friend, Ryan tried to beat me up.

Ryan; I know his kind well. All he’s looking for is his next lay and the next party. His kind doesn’t care about anyone, although I am surprised he took it upon himself to call me a scumbag and punch me. I’ve dealt with his kind plenty of times in my life and I was close to pressing charges. If he would have been anyone else I would have. People like him only learn one way, and that’s by falling, hard and struggling to get back up again. I couldn’t do that though, I could tell Crystal cares about him for whatever reason. She didn’t let on that he was anything other than a friend and I believe her. I don’t think she would be the kind to date a douche like him. He must be good at hiding the kind of person he is, if she’s been able to be his friend. At any rate I’m almost positive that she’s into me now. I mean hell; she’s had sex with me twice. I worry though, about Emily. She’s been texting me. One minute she’s apologizing and the next she’s telling me that she’s going to ruin my life. I feel bad about how we ended things; It was never my intention to make her upset like that. I wanted to calmly talk to her and let her down easy, but that didn’t happen. I probably shouldn’t have kissed Crystal in front of her, but I couldn’t help myself. Crystal is amazing, there’s just something about her. I find myself thinking about her and I miss her when I’m not with her. I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I think I might love her, she’s easy to love, but I want to give it time before I jump in with both feet. I want her to love me, but this snag with Ryan may shake things up a little bit. I have a feeling that he’s not done yet. Guys like him never are until they get what they want, and I’m pretty sure Ryan wants her. I just hope that she can look past the friendship and see him for what he really is.

I finish up in the shower, dry off and get dressed I have plans to see Caden, and then I have some classes. If I want to make a difference in people’s lives I have to do my best to get my degree. Thinking of which I need to declare my major. When I first enrolled I had no idea what I wanted to do. I was mentoring, but it was before I started my blog and saw the impact it was making. I’ve inspired other people around the world to get involved and make a difference. It’s amazing what a little blog on the internet can do.

I leave the dorm and hop on my motorcycle; I’m just stopping by to see how Caden is. I’m not taking him anywhere. Justin would have been happy about my motorcycle. It was his favorite form of transportation. It was just too bad that it was also the cause of his death, but he was always happiest riding his bike. I just wish we could have had one ride together before he died.

I pull up to the curb, park my bike and walk up the door, I knock and Caden’s mother lets me in. I go to his room, he’s in his bed with a pile of homework in front of him and he looks sad.

“What’s wrong?” I ask him and sit down next to him

“This sucks,” he says, not looking up at me and hanging his head.

“I know I’m sorry.” I sympathize and pat him on the back.

“I can’t even write. I broke the arm that I write with.” He says holding up his arm that’s covered in a bright green cast.

“I didn’t even realize that you broke your dominate arm.” I say and rub his back, and he frowns. “You just have to stay in there and try. I broke my right arm, it was so bad that the doctor had to put metal plates on both sides of the bone and screw them in. It took six months for my arm to finally heal. Do you want to know what I learned to do while my arm was in a cast?”

“What?” he asks; his eyes wide in fascination.

“I learned how to write with my left hand.”

“You did? Was it hard?” He gasps.

“Of course it was hard, but I really didn’t want to get behind in my school work and make bad grades. My school work was one of the few things I could count on from myself.” I tell him hoping to motivate him and cheer him up.

“Can you still write with your left hand?”

“Yeah, want to see? I’ll sign your cast with my left hand.”

“Awesome!” He says and smiles at me as he hands me a black marker.

I hold the marker in my left hand and scrawl, “This is the best restaurant I ever ate in.” across his cast. He stares at his arm, then looks at me confused. “What does that mean?”

“I don’t know. It was something my friend wrote on my cast when I broke my arm.” I smile as I recall Justin writing the same thing on my cast.

“He did?”

“Yeah, and one of these days maybe you’ll write it on someone’s cast. Maybe you’ll teach someone how to do tricks on a bike or a skateboard.”

“You really think I will?”

“Sure, why not, you can do anything you want to if you set your mind to it.” I say and pat him on the shoulder.

“Do you think I can learn write with my right hand?”

“I don’t see why not, all it takes is practice.”

“I going to try.” He says with determination

“Good, work on it and you can show me the next time I visit.” I encourage him.

“You’re leaving?”

“Yeah, I have class, that I have to go to, but I’ll come back soon, I promise.” I stand up, “I’ll see you later.”

“Okay,” he says and starts trying to write with his right hand on a piece of paper.

I leave his house, hop on my bike and ride back to campus. I feel so glad I was able to make him feel better even if it was just for a little while. I smile; now I have other things to look forward too, like Crystal. I plan on stopping by later and surprising her. Something tells me that she’ll like it.

Crystal

Chapter Seventeen

Talk

L
ooking down at the table full of books in front of me I sigh heavily and sniff as my tears dry up; So much for trying to get home work done now. I need someone to talk to someone who can help me sort out my feelings. There’s only one person who comes to mind. I leave my dorm and decide to go see Kelly. I hope she can shed some light on the situation while I vent. I knock on her door and an unfamiliar face opens it.

Yeah?” She asks

I look around, “Is Kelly here?”

“Who are you?”

“I’m her friend, Crystal.” I hold out my hand, but she doesn’t take it, instead she turns her head and yells, “KELLY! CRYSTAL IS HERE!”

I wince and thank her as Kelly appears and walks me back to her room.

Kelly smiles after releasing me from a hug, “Hi.”

I sit on her bed, “I need to talk to you.” I wring my hands, anxious about what I’m about to tell her and what her reaction will be. There’s a chance that I will never hear the end of it from Kelly after this and I’m not sure if I’m ready for that, but I have to talk to somebody.

She sits down next to me, “Of course, what’s wrong?”

I bury my face in my hands. “Oh, Kelly! I’m so confused.”

She leans her head down towards mine trying to see my face. “I’m sure it’s not that bad, what are you confused about?”

“Gabriel broke up with Emily, for me,” I sob.

Kelly looks thoughtful as she tries to understand, “I don’t see what the problem is.”

I close my eyes, “It’s a long story, and it’s complicated.”

She rubs my back, “So start from the beginning.”

I look into her eyes, “Are you sure you have time for all of this?”

She leans close to me and puts her arm around me, “Of course I do, I’m your friend, Crystal, that’s what I’m here for.”

“Okay,” I sigh and take a deep breath. “From the beginning,” I exhale and launch into the story telling her about Gabriel, when I met him and why I chose this college. She just listens thoughtfully as I explain our date, our kiss and the fight between Gabriel and Ryan.

She frowns, “Why didn’t you tell me about that?”

I stammer, caught off guard, I thought she knew, “I-I don’t know.”

“Is he still there?”

“No,” I answer, “But there’s more.”

She nods for me to continue and I tell her about my threesome with Gabriel and my phone call with my mother. I start to cry as I tell her how much I miss my mom; she pats and rubs my back. I take a deep breath and tell her about Ryan, how he came to my dorm telling me that he loves me and asking me to forgive him and give him a chance.

I pause again, “I don’t know what to do. I really care about Gabriel, he’s amazing, but I don’t want to lose Ryan. He’s been there for me and I don’t know what I would do without him.

Kelly hugs me, “It’s about time he tells you how he feels.”

I stare at her in shock, “You knew?”

Kelly smiles, “It was obvious. He would fumble all over himself to help you and you didn’t even notice and he was always defending you. It was sad to watch; all he wanted was for you to notice him and you didn’t. I knew he was upset with you the other day, when you were talking about Gabriel. I told him to either tell you or let you go. I never imagined it would turn into this.”

I close my eyes, listening Kelly’s voice. It makes so much sense now. How did I miss it? “How come I didn’t notice? I never knew, Kelly.”

“You were focused on other things, and Ryan has always been there. He’s always been a friend to you. It happens.”

“Oh my god, I feel so horrible. This whole time, and all the other guys I’ve dated. Gabriel. Oh my god!” My head is spinning.

“I’m sorry this is so hard on you,” Kelly sooths.

“I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how I feel about Ryan. I know how I feel about Gabriel, but it’s like Ryan threw a curve ball at me”

“Does Ryan know that you’ve been with Gabriel?” Kelly asks, smoothing my hair.

Tears flood my eyes again, “No, he doesn’t know about any of it. When he told me how he felt I started crying.

Kelly hugs me again, “Oh, Crystal. Go talk to Gabriel. Tell him what happened, see what he says. Don’t say anything to Ryan until you’re ready to see him. Just be honest.” Kelly advises

I hug her back, “Thanks, Kelly.”

Kelly strokes my hair, “Any time, I’m here whenever you need to talk.”

I smile, comforted by her words, “I know, thank you. I’ll let you know how it all goes.”

Kelly smiles back, “You’d better.”

I leave; my mind clear and a plan is beginning to form. As I’m walking back to my dorm I hear my name, “Crystal!” Gabriel’s voice calls. I turn looking for him and I see him walking towards me. I wave and he waves back. I walk towards him and hug him when we meet. He lifts my face and looks me in my eyes, and kisses me. I could really get used to this, if this is how he will greet me each time.

He pulls away smiling at me, “I’ve missed you.”

I smile back, “I’ve missed you too.”