Swept (16 page)

“I want to be your rescue, Crystal. We don’t need compasses or charts; all we need is each other”

“But I’m scared, Gabriel. I’m scared of the choices that I make when I’m with you. I’m scared of losing my way, losing my focus.” I’m surprised by my honesty; I’ve never talked to anyone like this.

“Then let’s be lost together. Let’s move through this. Life is supposed to be unpredictable together. Let’s experience it together!”

I bite my lip. I want what he’s offering. I want to throw myself into him and let us go wherever life takes us. I want to forget about my goals, and forget everything else. I want to take this ride, but something holds me back. If I lose sight now, if I go with Gabriel, then I may become my mother; working two jobs to pay the bills. She worked too hard, and missed too much for me to throw it all away. In my mind I see her face, she’s disappointed in me. She wants me to finish school, it’s important to her.

“I want to Gabriel, I really do, but I’m not ready yet.”

Gabriel hangs his head. “Then take as long as you need. I will wait however long I have to wait, and I will be whatever you need me to be. I want to be in your life, because you’re worth waiting for.” With that he turns and leaves.

I shrink back onto the couch, pondering his words. I need to figure out what I want. I like Gabriel; I think he’s wonderful I can see myself being happy with him and satisfied. I think about Ryan and all the history we have. He knows me so well, and knows what I like and we don’t have to guess at anything, we just are and it’s so easy. I still don’t know who I want. I need to spend some time with Ryan, alone. I need to figure this out. I pick up my phone and I call Ryan. He sound surprised to hear from me and I ask him if I can come over, of course he says yes. I hang up after we say our goodbyes, and then send Gabriel a quick text asking him to meet me at my room later this evening. I know I’m going to need to talk to him after I go to Ryan’s I know what we’re going to do; we’re going to have sex. I know it’s imminent and I imagine it will be soft and sweet. I can’t imagine it any other way. I go to my room, put on some clothes, look at myself in the mirror and take a deep breath expelling it slowly; today everything changes.

Chapter Twenty Three

Ryan

I
leave my dorm and walk over to Ryan’s. Thoughts swirl through my mind as I walk. Just yesterday he was my friend turning my life upside down by telling me that he’s in love with me. Just yesterday I was daydreaming about spending time with Gabriel and imagining where our new relationship would take us. Just yesterday I had only been involved in one threesome and that was with Gabriel’s ex. I start to feel anxious as I get closer to Ryan’s dorm. I enter and walk down the hall and stop at his door. My stomach is doing flip flops as I bring my hand up to knock on the door. After today, there is no going back. I don’t know if Ryan will ever be able to be my friend again. If I stop now, walk away and make some excuse for not showing up we can count last night as some odd fluke and I can move on with Gabriel, but there will always be a part of me that would want to know if we can work; and I have to know. I knock, and there’s nothing I can do now to take it back. Ryan opens the door and leads me to his room. I move close to him to kiss him, he pushes me back. I look at him confused. Was last night too much for him? Did he decide he didn’t want me after all? I look at the floor, hurt. Why did he push me away?

“I gave you your way last night,” He says with a glint in his eyes I look at him shocked, I thought he was rejecting me. “Now you’re going to do things my way, and you’re going to like it,” He says walking towards me.

He kisses me fiercely I feel my passion build I want him inside of me. I don’t care if I’m sore, I don’t care if there’s no going back; I’ll get over it. I just want him and I move my hands to the top of his pants. He pulls away.

“Uh uh,” He chides. “I’ll tell you when I’m ready for you to take off my pants.”

He reaches for the hem of my shirt and he pulls it over my head. He reaches behind me, unclasps my bra, and pulls it off of me. He stares at my bare chest and regards them. He cups them, flicks my nipples and then sucks on each one. I sigh heavily. He brings his face up to mine and kisses me again then tells me to get on my knees. He takes his pants off and sticks his cock in my mouth.

“Now suck it.” He orders “Suck hard.” I obey his command and begin to suck. “Suck it harder. I know you can do better than that.” I pretend I’m trying to drink a really thick shake; I suck with all my being moving him deeper into my mouth. “Much better.” He says. “Suck me until I come.” I keep sucking, and bobbing my head. I swirl my tongue around the tip of his penis. I keep going until he moans and I feel his juices in my mouth. “You’re amazing, Crystal, better than I imagined.” He praises as I swallow his fluid.

“Come here,” he says pulling me up and he kisses me again, he reaches down and pulls my pants off along with my panties. “Lay down on the bed” he orders and I comply. He spreads my legs and he puts his mouth on my pussy. He sucks my clit then puts his tongue inside me. I moan at the feel.

“Yeah, you like that don’t you,” He asks

“Yes.” I say.

“Yes what?” He asks

“I like it when you lick my pussy.” I answer. He licks me again then puts his fingers inside me he moves them around and I moan again. He begins to suck on my breast while fingering me. I feel myself get warm.

“You will not come until I tell you to.” He directs. “Do you understand?”

“Yes.” I answer.

He continues to finger me and I feel myself building, my breathing gets harder. “I’m going to come!” I exclaim

“Not yet.” He says and slows down the pace. He continues to bring me to the brink and then slows down again, torturing me. Then finally he brings me to the brink, “Come.” He orders and I let go screaming as I do. I’ve never experienced a more powerful orgasm than this. I regain myself, and Ryan is on top of me

“I’m going to fuck you now.” He states and slams his erection inside of me. He moves quickly and I’m building up again “Let it go.” He commands and I orgasm, but he doesn’t stop thrusting. I build up again, and he thrusts faster. “Come.” He yells and I shatter into another climax. He’s still thrusting into me lifting my butt off the bed and pounds even harder I feel myself build. “This time together he says.” I begin to let go and I hear him call out my name as he finds his release. He lies down next to me and holds me as I fall asleep.

Gabriel

Chapter Twenty Four

Crystal

I
had to do it. I had to let her go. I had to let her explore her feelings for Ryan. He’s some kind of asshole to do what he has planned, and there’s not a thing I can do about it. If I tell Crystal what I really think about Ryan it can bite me in the butt later and I can’t have that. I must prove that I am the better guy; I must be the better guy. Playing dirty is going to do nothing but hurt Crystal and I can’t do that to her. That’s not the kind of person I am. Besides Crystal will realize that we work; it may take her a while, but I know that will be her conclusion. She’s smart, and Ryan will slip up somewhere along the way. And I’ll be there ready to sweep her off her feet. I already warned Ryan of that and if he’s smart he’ll back off and let her figure this out, but Ryan has only one thing on his mind and that his dick. That’s all he cares about and it shows.

I know she’s over there and I know why she’s over there and the whole idea sickens me to my core. To think that she’s with him having sex; I can’t let it consume me. I knew this would happen the minute I told her to talk to him and figure it out. But it’s the right thing to do. I think back to that windy day when we met. I saw that flyer coming for me and I stopped it for her. I don’t think she knows that I did it on purpose. I saw her from afar and I was struck by her beauty. I was even more in awe of her when I talked to her. She’s like no other girl that I’ve ever met and I find that refreshing and exciting. Who knew that that windy day would lead to all of this? That I would be standing here wondering what she’s going to do. That so much of my world hangs on the balance of today. Will she still want me around? I hope she does. After all I made it clear that I’m going to be there for her no matter what. I don’t care what it is I have to do to be in her life, I’m going to do it.

I go back to my dorm and update my blog. My fundraiser has reached an amount I never expected. Soon I’ll be able to buy the building that I want and fix it up. A new chapter is beginning in my life and I’m excited I can’t wait to find out what the following days and weeks are to bring. So far they’ve brought me love and a purpose in life. I finally know what it is I want to do and in a way I have Crystal to thank for that. She made me realize what it is I like to do and showed me how to be decisive. My phone beeps I look at the screen and read the text. She wants me to see her later. My stomach flips as I wonder what this means. Whatever it is I’ll be ready. I want her at all costs.

Crystal

Chapter Twenty Five

Options

I
wake up and see Ryan sitting in a chair by the bed, staring at me as I stare back. “You were amazing.” He praises, “We’re perfect for each other.”

I consider his words. I’ve never been dominated like that in the bedroom before. I’ve never seen him in this way before. I thought we would make sweet gentle love, like they do in the movies, but instead he fucked me. I didn’t even get to fuck him. He dominated me, and he made me want him. I can imagine what it would be like if we continue. Sexually, I will experience things I’ve never experienced before and Ryan would be leading the way, coaching me on what to do. But would I ever be able to dominate him? I look at his face and I remember his words. I don’t think it will ever happen. “I’ve never been fucked like that before.” I finally manage to say.

“I thought so,” He grins “you’re usually the one calling the shots. I’ve always wanted to fuck you and put you in your place.” I can see the heat behind his eyes. He seems turned on, just by thinking of dominating me. I feel a shiver run though my body.

“Ryan?”

“Yes?”

“If I choose you, what will happen?” I ask, wanting to know his expectations. I want to know what I might be getting myself into, so I can decide what I want because I still don’t know.

“You’ll be my girlfriend. I’ll take away your burden of having to figure out what you want. I’ll make decision for you and you won’t have to worry about anything. You’ll be taken care of, and you’ll be happy. I see what a burden it is for you. You want everything to be perfect, so you stress out and agonize over every choice you make. You’re worried you’re going to mess up, or disappoint your mother. I won’t let that happen. I’ll be there for you helping you with everything you do. And in the bedroom; I will dominate you. I will make you feel what it is to be lusted after and to fulfill my desires. Judging by what we just did earlier, I know you’ll like it too.”

Ryan is asking me to give up my control and the idea scares me. It’s the one thing that I’ve held tightly to with both hands clenched. To let someone else take that over; I don’t know if I can do it. “What happens if I don’t choose you?” I ask; I almost don’t want to hear his answer.

“I hate to say this, but I don’t think I’ll be able to be around you if you choose someone else. I’ve been your friend for years. I’ve always wanted you, and I’ve sat by on the side wishing you would see what was in front of you. Instead I watched you time after time choose someone who wasn’t right for you. I held you and put you back together after they left your heart in pieces, and I can’t keep doing that. You either choose me or I’m done. I’ll request for my classes to be changed, or I’ll move to a new campus. You have to see that I love you and I want to be the man for you. I will never break your heart. I will treat you with respect. I will do my best to make things easy for you. You’ve already gone through so much, and I’m here to make your life better.

I consider his words; they give me a lot to think about. “I feel safe with you, Ryan. You’ve always been there for me. You’re my rock and I can’t imagine my life without you. It would hurt me if you left me. You’ve been here all this time and I’ve been too blind to see it. I know my life with you would be easy and you would be there for me, but Gabriel is unpredictable. I find myself making rash decisions because of him. It scares me and excites me all at once. I don’t know what to expect with Gabriel. I still don’t know what I want, Ryan, and I need time to think this through. Promise me you’ll wait. Promise me you won’t leave me.”

“I promise I won’t. You gave me a chance, and now I’ll give you one, I just hope you make the right choice and choose me. You know I’m perfect for you and you know that when we’re together we’re epic.”

He’s right, sex with him is epic, and I do like being dominated by him, but that’s not enough. “I’m going to go now; I have a lot to think about.”

“Let me know,” Ryan says and he leads me out of his dorm.

I walk back to my room and lay down on my bed. Gabriel says he’ll be there for me no matter what. I don’t have him figured out yet and I love how I feel when I’m with him. Everything seems new and exciting, and I want to get to know him. But there’s a part that scares me. I chose this school because of him. If it weren’t for that pamphlet flying in the wind I never would have met him and I wouldn’t be in this predicament. Maybe Gabriel is my destiny. Maybe I’m supposed to choose him. I can see our life together unpredictable and full of surprises. I feel excited and frightened all at once. If Gabriel causes me to make rash decisions, what other decisions will I make because of him? He’s stuck in my head and I can’t get him out. I see him when I’m in class. I’m thinking about him when I try to study. He distracts me, and He’s my equal in bed. He lets me dominate him, but he can dominate me too. I like that, and I could live with that.