Spiralling Out of the Shadow (The Spiralling Trilogy) (10 page)

‘
So are you coming back to dance?’ Joey rang out of the blue.

‘No, I’
d rather do something else this year.’

‘
What? Like hang out down at the beach?’

‘
Y-e-s.’ I drew the word out. How did he know I was at the beach? ‘That and other things.’

‘
What about your friends?’

‘Do you mean Suzie? She’
ll be back if her parents let her.’ I smiled and let the silence linger. I wished one of them would make a move.

‘
Oh, ah ... that’s good. Anyway, do you remember my mate, Danny?’

‘Yeah.’
I tried to sound aloof in my response, but just the mention of his name, sent visuals of him walking along the beach. His biceps. His sun-bleached hair. His wide smile.

‘
Apparently you really wowed a friend of his today. They were both asking for your number, but I didn’t want to give it to them without checking with you first.’

‘
Oh, thanks, Joey. Some guy did come up and talk to me but I don’t remember his name.’

‘
Rhett. Does that sound familiar?’

‘
Mmm.’ I repeated his name in my mind and cringed. ‘Yes.’

‘
Well, he’s been nagging me all afternoon. Is it okay if I give him your number?’

So, I could say no, and wonder if I had the wrong first impression. Or I could say yes and actually get to know a guy, who
might be interested in me. 

‘
Sure. That should be okay.’ I hung up but didn’t dare move away from the phone. I half expected Rhett to ring back immediately. Hopefully I’d made the right decision. Oh, no. I shouldn’t have said yes. My stomach knotted up again.

Leaning against the wall,
I looked out the front windows at the night lights and I tried to remember exactly what he looked like. But all I could see was Danny. I blinked a couple of times to remove his surfing image from my mind. I should have got straight back into study. The phone stayed silent for the rest of the night.

‘
Hey, Tabbie.’ Mum stopped me as I went to climb the stairs. ‘I know Stephanie’s your best friend, and her parents seem to be okay with her having a boyfriend. But it’s still the same deal for you. We, your father and I, still want you to wait until you are at least sixteen before you start dating.’

Groan.
 I couldn’t believe the timing of the conversation. ‘But Mum, my birthday is like, a couple of weeks away.’

‘
More like a few months. But a rule is a rule. And that’s what we’ve decided is right for our family. And if you do start dating after you turn sixteen, zero bedroom entertainment.’ She gave me a hug and that warm caring smile that made me wish I could just be happy with how things were.

The next
morning, Steph flew past me on the staircase. ‘See ya later. I’m running late for work again.’

‘
Steph,’ Mum called from the kitchen. ‘Let me wash my hands and I’ll drive you.’

I watc
hed the door close behind them and was happy to be home alone for a while. Dad had gone for a walk to buy the Sunday paper, and Mum wouldn’t be back for at least fifteen minutes.

I sat on the couch and flicked through the channels, unable to focus on anything, wondering if Danny
’s friend would call. Or maybe even Danny. After five minutes had passed, my stomach began to knot again and I hoped no one would ring. Everything would stay simple if no one rang. I turned the TV off. Church would be starting soon. Just as I turned the door knob to leave, the silence broke. Ring, ring. Ring, ring.

‘
Hey, hello,’ I answered out of breath. Not that I’d been running or anything—my breath just seemed to disappear.

‘
Is that Tabbie?’ A slightly familiar, yet over-the-top confident voice asked.

‘Yeah.’

‘Rhett here, we met on the beach yesterday. I’m sure you’ve been dreaming about me since then.’

I couldn
’t help but laugh. I didn’t know if he was joking or if my nerves had taken over.

‘
Well, you have to admit, you couldn’t keep your eyes off me. I saw you watching me walk out of the surf and along the beach.’

‘No, I don’
t remember that.’ Um, I was watching Danny, not you. But Danny wasn’t the one on the other end of the line.

‘
Oh.’ He was silent for a moment. ‘Well, it must have been me who couldn’t keep my eyes off you.’

Whoa. His straightforward flirtatious way was something that only an ant might enjoy.

‘So, what do you say to a movie this Friday night?’

‘
I go to youth group on Friday night. Maybe another time.’

‘
I’ve heard all about your youth group. How about if you come to the movies this Friday, I’ll go to your youth group the next week.’

That sounded okay. Oh, where was Steph? I wished she was beside me to help with my decision.

‘Okay,’ I said, because I just didn’t know what else to say.

Maybe I should have said no, but he was already making arrangements to meet at the cinema.
I rubbed my stomach as it pulled into a cramp.

He wanted to meet at
seven just in time for the movie.

I hung up as the sound of car wheels hit our driveway. Mum. With my handbag over my shoulder, I ran out the door as she came in.

‘See ya. I’m off to church.’ I didn’t dare look back.

‘Oh, you should have said, love. I could’ve dropped you while I was out.’

‘Never mind.’ The walk to the bus would hopefully help my clear my mind and relax my stomach.

During church,
Danny’s muscles flexed as he played music with the band. I looked away. He was a nerd. Plus, his friend Rhett had just asked me out.

I was still trying to get my head around the possibility of my first date, so I didn
’t mention it to Priscilla or Shelly. They went out to lunch with a bunch of girls, but I decided to enjoy a long walk home. I surrendered myself to the delicious warm day as the slightest breeze lifted the leaves on the path. The gust carried my steps and my thoughts. Maybe it was time to check out the dating waters. What did I have to lose? I’d already said yes. No turning back now.

When I arrived home the house seemed empty, until the echo of voices rolled down the stairway.

‘Stop it,’ Steph said in a raspy voice.

A deep mail voice rumbled with laughter. Jason?
 

‘
Hi, Stephanie,’ I poked my head through her open doorway trying to put on a spontaneous “didn’t-know-you-had-company” face. ‘Oh. Hi, Jason. Sorry. Didn’t realise you were here.’

Stephanie raised her eyebrows and eyed my door way across the hall. My arrival was obviously bad timing in her eyes.

‘Okay, we can chat later then.’ I clenched my jaw and turned to leave. 

‘
Is there something you wanted to talk about?’ She followed me into the hallway.

‘No, no. It’s nothing important. Just come and chat when Jason goes.’ I only have boy problems, but you have a real, tangible boyfriend.

‘Won’
t be long, he’s about to leave.’ Stephanie smiled and returned to Jason.

I pulled out my folder and tried to work on the most pressing assignment. But
my gaze kept heading out the window.

Stephanie took her time seeing Jason o
ff before she came to my door. ‘What’s up?’

‘You didn’
t have to kick him out because of me.’

‘I
t’s okay. He was about to leave.’ Stephanie sat on my bed and inspected her fingernails. ‘So, what do you want to talk about?’

‘Rhett asked me out on a date.’

‘
Wow, that’s exciting.’

‘
If Mum and Dad would let me go out on a date, it would be exciting.’

‘So, tell me.
Who’s Rhett? Where did you meet him?’

‘At the beach yesterday.’

‘And why won’t your parents let you go?’ asked Stephanie. ‘I knew they were strict, but you’ll be sixteen soon.’

‘
Not for another two months. They said I have to wait.’

‘
What if you just go on a date without them knowing?’

‘
I can’t lie to them.’ I’d never lied to my parents.

‘
Or ...’ Steph paused for a moment. ‘Well, just tell them something like ... you’re staying at a friend’s house, but then go on the date from there. You just have to ask a friend.’

‘How is that not lying?’
I bit my lip, squinting.

‘
Do you want to go or not?’

‘
I do.’ My shoulders tensed. ‘But I’m not a liar. I don’t want to lie to Mum and Dad.’

‘
Well?’ Stephanie raised her eyebrows.

I lifted my head as we communicated without sound.
A conversation that would have sounded like. Me: Maybe I could. Steph: Yes, why not. Go for it. Me: But I don’t really want to lie. Steph: Just this time.

When I couldn’t stand the silent chatter between our eyes a moment longer, I asked, ‘Do you think Suzie or Janet would be okay with me staying at their house for a night?’

‘
You can only ask.’

‘
What if you come and stay too?’

‘
Which night?’ Stephanie pulled her hair into a ponytail.

‘This Friday.’

‘What about youth group—won’t you have that Friday night?’

‘
It’s only once, and he said he’d come with me to youth group next week.’

‘
I’m working Friday night. Plus Jason has asked me out.’ Stephanie looked at me through the corner of her eye. ‘But I guess I could go there with you straight after school.’

‘
How would that work? Would you get Jason to drop you back?’

‘Um ... I think ...’
Stephanie paused.

She wanted to hide i
t from me, but I knew. ‘Are you sure? I thought you said you didn’t want to—’

‘Yeah, you’
re right. I’ll get him to drop me off—probably after midnight. We’ll just have to get one of the girls to agree to help you out.’

The next day
, Steph and I found Janet and Suzie talking in the school grounds. I was pretty sure Suzie would say no straight away.

‘As if …’
Suzie shook her head. ‘You’re still in Mum’s bad books.’

Janet seemed certain we would be allowed to go to her house.
 She came to school the next day excited.

‘
Yeah, no problems. Mum and Dad are cool with it all.’ She eyeballed both Suzie and me. ‘They think your parents are way-over-the-top-too-strict.’

‘
That’s great.’ Stephanie beamed a wide grin. ‘Now all Tabbie has to do is ask her parents and it’s all sorted.’

‘You mean you haven’
t asked them yet?’ Janet looked at me screwing up her nose.

‘That’
s not like you,’ Suzie said, with a soft tone.

Talk about stating the obvious. I was still coming to terms with the fact I was about to lie to my parents
, so I put it off as long as I could.

A shudder ran down my spine
that night as I asked Mum and Dad about staying at Janet’s house. They thought it was a great idea, because they were going out to a fiftieth birthday party and were happy they weren’t leaving me home alone.

M
y stomach began to churn. I’d lied.

*~*~*~*

‘Now, you’ll call me anytime if you want to come home, won’t you?’ Mum insisted when we left for school on Friday morning.

‘Mum
.’ I rolled my eyes.

‘
Sure, Francine, we will.’ Stephanie lifted her overflowing school bag onto her shoulder. ‘Won’t we, Tabbie?’

‘
Have a great time, and be careful.’ Mum smiled in her very protective way.

The final bell rang Friday afternoon and I trembled. I took a long deep breath to calm myself. The three of us caught the bus back to Janet
’s. Soon after we got there, Steph wished me well and left to go to work.

‘
She didn’t hang around for long.’ Janet pointed to the door after Stephanie left.

‘
She had to get to work. You know that.’

‘
Why did she even come here in the first place? Wouldn’t it have been easier for her just to go to work from your house?’

‘
Yes, it would. But she came to support me.’

‘
To support Miss Goody Two Shoes’ lies?’ Janet raised her eyebrows.

I frowned at her and a shudder ran through my spine.
How was I going to make it through? That’s it. No more lies. Ever.

‘
Do you think she’ll come back here or go to your place after work?’

‘
I don’t know. We’ll just have to listen for her.’

‘
Okay, let’s get started.’ Janet pulled out a make-up case and hair iron. ‘How about we straighten your hair for your big date.’

I swallowed. I swallowed again. I tried to downplay it and not make it such a big deal. The last thing I wanted was for Janet to swing from the highest tree shouting,
“Tabbie’s going on her first big real date.”

I sat on the bed watching her with the iron in the mirror. My face looked long with straight hair.

‘You have that concerned look in your eyes. What’s up?’ Janet pulled the straightener away and sat beside me.

‘
It’s just ... I look so different. What if he doesn’t recognise me? What if he thinks I look ugly like this?’

‘
Tabbie, you’re so pretty, it wouldn’t matter what you did with your hair. You could shave your head and still look amazing.’

Even though I
still wasn’t sure about the straight hair, one thing I was pretty sure of—I wasn’t about to try the bald look. She finished with my hair and went to apply my make-up.

‘
Janet, thanks, but I can do that myself.’

I brushed a little mascara across my lashes and smudged on some brown eyeliner. I wiped watermelon
lip gloss across my lips and put it in my pocket for another application later.

Mum would be beside herself if she knew I planned to walk
the couple of blocks from Janet’s by myself. But this time, just for once, I wanted to be the girl who could go out on a date and not have Mum and Dad clucking over me. A shivery tingle went up my spine at the thought, so I left while it was still light and hung around the front of the cinema, people watching.

I checked the times and hoped Rhett would arrive early. The last movie started at
six-thirty and the next sessions didn’t start ’til late. Just after seven, a plain-looking lanky boy walked around the corner and straight up to me. When he kissed me on the cheek and handed me a bunch of red carnations, I recognised him. Rhett. My cheeks burned hot. I was sure they’d flushed to a bright red. I wouldn’t have recognised him if he didn’t find me first. He looked different in a shirt.

Awkward.
I didn’t know where to look, so I stuck my nose into the flowers and smelt them. They had no scent.

‘
Thanks,’ I said.

‘
What movie are we seeing?’ He started walking towards the counter.

‘We’
ve missed the first session.’

‘
Oh, damn.’ Rhett cursed a string of unsavoury words under his breath. ‘We could still go in.’

‘
No, it’s too late now. I hate missing the beginning.’

He cursed
again, kicking his toe into the tiles.

‘
Did you want to just get a milkshake?’ My mouth was dry.

‘
Good idea, and then we could catch one of the late movies. What flavour would you like?’

‘
Caramel, please. But I’d rather not stay out that late, so how about just a milkshake.’

He winked and ordered at the counter. I slipped into a booth and found myself staring out the window. How could he be so inconsiderate to be late
? And how could I be so dumb to agree to a date with guy I wasn’t the least bit attracted to? And even dumber, I’d just suggested a milkshake. More time with him when I could have gone straight home.

I expected Rhett to sit opposite me, and almost jumped out of my skin when he slid in
so close he nudged my arm. I couldn’t work out if he was just overconfident, with a straightforward manner, or actually a flirt. He draped his arm around my shoulders. I wondered how I could remove it without being completely rude. Sitting up a little straighter I cleared my throat.

‘Not comfortable?’

‘Ah, not really.’ I lifted one shoulder then the other, trying to shake free.

‘Do you want me to move my arm?’

‘That would be great.’

Before I
’d taken a sip of my milkshake, Rhett put his straw in. ‘Let’s drink it together.’

‘
Gross.’ I knew right then, I did
not
want to share anything with him.

I wanted to get away but I was sandwiched between Rhett and the wall. He
pulled his straw out, dropped it into his milkshake and grabbed my thigh. I pushed his hand away as his other hand grabbed my chest.

‘
Rhett!’ I shoved him away again and slid under the table, crawling out into public view.

‘
Hey, what’s up?’ he asked with questioning hands.

‘I’
m going.’

‘
You can’t walk home alone.’ He slid off the seat and followed me.

At that point walking home alone seemed a whole lot safer than walking home with Rhett. I
hurried. But he was close behind me, so I picked up the pace. The thud of his footsteps followed me. I turned and asked him to stop following.

‘
Hey, babe, don’t be like that.’ He groped at my waist.

‘
Urgh.’ I swiped his arm away and ran. But still the scuff of his running feet followed me. I shuddered when I saw the street was deserted. Just me and him. I raced towards Janet’s. Until I ... tripped.

My weak ankle buckled and I crashed onto the concrete path. I was too freaked out by the way he kept following me to stop and check the damage. I scrambled up, hoping my ankle would work again. It hurt. But I ran on it anyway.

Rhett’s laughter rumbled behind me.

‘
Shut up!’ I yelled, but didn’t turn back.

Thankfully Janet’
s doorknob turned. I flung it wide and then locked it behind me.

‘
Janet, he’s gross! Check through the window. Please tell me he’s gone.’

‘There’s someone walking the other way. Is that him?’

‘Yes.’ I glanced through the window as he crossed the road and kept walking without turning around.

‘
Didn’t go too well I take it?’

‘Like a nightmare, Janet. He’s a complete creep!’
As I spoke, tears swelled in Janet’s eyes. ‘Hey, what’s up?’

‘
Mum and Dad had another huge fight. They both took off. Mum thinks Dad’s been having an affair.’

‘
Oh.’ Is this when I say something about the noises I heard the night Janet was paralytic? Probably not. I didn’t actually see anything. It would be devastating if I was wrong. I leant over and hugged her. About now would have been a nice moment to pass her my bouquet of carnations, but I’d left them at the cafe. Hopefully they were brightening someone’s night.

We drank hot chocolate with marshmallows, and camped out in the lounge room in case Stephanie arrived home.

When I woke up, it was just the two of us and Janet’s mum. She looked miserable.  I needed to get out of their house so they could deal with their family crisis.