Spark (19 page)

I can’t even argue with my mother. She has a way about her that you just obey whatever she says.
Perhaps it’s the preacher in her, or perhaps it’s just the mother in her.
Or both.

My dad stands there silent, taking the whole scene in. He never
under minds my mother. It’s pathetic, really. It’s as if he’s nonexistent.

“Mom, I’m sick of you not listening to me!” I shout, giving her a stern look. It’s the first time I’ve actually yelled at her.
She’s stunned, but after all this time, it feels great.

My dad’s mouth opens, but doesn’t say anything. I assume he doesn’t know what to say and neither do I.
Aiden’s eyes widen as he realizes I’m not going to back down. His face darkens, giving me an intense look.

“This was a mistake,” I mutter, grabbing my purse from the counter.

“Wait,” my mother whispers, barely sounding persuasive. I want to continue walking, but I don’t. I’m curious to hear what she has to says.

“What?” I ask, looking over my shoulder.
Aiden and my dad are both watching her, waiting to see what she does.

Instead of talking, she walks in front of me and pulls me in for a hug. “I love you, Velaney,” she whispers in my ear still holding onto me. “Take care of yourself.” She looks over to Aiden, giving me a secret message.

And then I finally understand.

All these years I believed
my parents chose Aiden over me… loved him and cherished him more. But that wasn’t it.
It was never it.

I finally saw it in my mother’s eyes.
Fear.
Aiden has more power over my family than I ever thought imaginable. I don’t know what he has on my parents, but he definitely controls them.

I hug my mother back, whispering that I love her
, too. I don’t understand how my parents can let Aiden run their lives… or rather,
ruin
their lives. But I was determined not to let Aiden ruin mine.

Or so I thought.

I grab the handle of the Ladybug, but before I can get in, Aiden’s hand slams it shut, nearly taking my fingers out in the process.

“That…
was close,” I scowl.

“Not close enough,” he mocks, sending shivers down my body at how
firm, and rough his voice is.

“What do you want?”

“We need to have a little chat, Princess.”

“I don’t think so,” I say firmly, clearly annoyed and a little skittish.

“This is your last warning. Next time, I’ll make sure Eric doesn’t walk away.” The way his tongue says Eric’s name sends a chill down my spine. This is who Aiden is…threatening, challenging, and true to his word.

“Leave Eric alone,” I say with as much firmness in my voice as I can manage. I’m ready to burst into tears at just the thought of him hurting Eric again.

“The only way that’ll happen is if you’re not his.” I give him a questioning look, making sure I hear him right. “You are mine. I had you first.”

“That’s frigging
sick!” I spit out, feeling disgusted and dirty. “I’m not your property. I’m not anyone’s property!”

“We’ll see about that. If you want to keep your man safe, you need to leave him. You hear me?” he threatens, slowly speaking inches from my face.
The fact that he still has this hold on me makes me want to kick myself. The fear…the weak feeling…the inability to fight back…

I hate him.

“If I break up with him, you won’t touch him? You’ll leave him alone?” I ask. I want to make sure I know exactly what I need to do to keep Eric safe.

“That’s right, Princess. I don’t want his hands to ever touch you again.” Th
is thought makes me sick to my stomach.

I’m making a deal with the devil.

“Just give me one more night with him.” I lower my voice sounding pathetic, begging almost. If there was one thing I knew…Aiden
always
follows through on his word.

“You have twenty-four hours.” He pushes his face forward, almost into mine.
“And Princess, I
will
know.”

I feel numb the entire drive back home. I don’t allow myself to cry. I have to keep it together
. I can’t break down when I finally see Eric again.
For the last time.

Aiden’s threat was more than that.
It was a promise. I’d grown up with him, for goodness sake, and I knew all too well that he never broke a promise.

As
I walk into the apartment building, I take the elevator to the fourth floor. I want to check on Eric and make sure he’s feeling better. I have one more night with him, and I was not going to waste another second.

“Sweetheart, is that you?” I hear
him weakly through the door.

“Yeah, babe. It’s me.”
I try to keep my voice strong. I can’t break down. He whips the door open in only his briefs, making me gasp a little.

Oh, good Lord, he looks incredible.

“Where have you been?” he asks, sincerely worrying about me.

“I went…home,” I say softly, preparing for the load of questions I’m sure he’s going to ask me.
He leads me in, kisses me softly and so frigging tenderly, I about melt in his arms.

He pulls back and looks at me
as if he’s trying to figure out if he should open that conversation up or not.

“I went to see my parents,” I explain. He nods, waiting for me to continue.
“I just needed to see them,” is all I say. I just don't want to think about it. “Are you feeling better?” I ask, changing the subject.

“Much better now that you’re here.”
His smiles widens, making me want to caress my lips over his and his entire body, too. The fact that he’s standing in front of me almost naked is making it very hard to keep my word. But I have to.
I have to protect him.

I force a smile and greet his lips with mine. We walk hand in hand to his bedroom where he grabs a shirt and pulls it over his head. He then grabs a pair of sport shorts and pulls them up his legs, although I prefer he stay undressed.

“So…do you want to talk about it?” he asks, trying to read my expression.

“Not really,” I reply. “Sorry.” I shrug my shoulders, hoping he doesn’t take it personally.
“I just want to spend tonight with you. Especially after what happened.”

He scoops me off the floor and my arms automatically wrap around his neck.
“We can spend all night together, sweetheart. I don’t want you out of my sight.” His smile sends shivers down my body, closing my eyes as I memorize his scent.

It’s hard to believe how addictive Eric is for me. No one has ever co
me close—I’ve never wanted anyone like this. I can’t wrap my brain around what I have to do, but I love him, and I’ll do whatever it takes to save him.

I rise on my tiptoes and crush my lips to his. He wraps his arms around my waist, lifting me up to wrap my legs around him. The intimate contact immediately arouses him, making me
desire him more than ever, and I realize this will be a night to remember.

“Are you sure you
’re feeling okay?” I ask, breaking the kiss.

“
Darlin’, when you’re around. I feel fucking amazing.” Before I can respond, he crushes his lips back to mine, slamming us against the wall. I deepen the kiss, begging for his taste. The heat between us in undeniable. I wrap my fingers in his hair, tugging the strands urgently.
God, I need him.

He presses his firmness into me,
causing a moan to escape my mouth. I thrust my hips into him, telling him exactly what I want. He pulls us away from the wall and brings us to his bed. We don’t even make it out of his bedroom. Putting clothes on was a waste of time…

“Babe, I need to tell you something first.” I break our lips apart, giving him time to rip his shirt back off. I stumble, nervous at what I’m about to say. “I…love you.” He pauses as he watches me. “I just want you to know that.”

“I love you, sweetheart.” He doesn’t realize the desperation in my voice. He has no idea what’s coming.

H
e throws his shirt to the floor, barely letting go of me. He dives his mouth to my neck, making me forget everything. When I’m with Eric…everything bad in the world erases.

He rubs a hand up my side, pulling the shirt up with him.
The skin on skin contact sends me into a frenzy already. My thighs tingle, desperate and eager for him to fill me.

I tug on his shorts and wedge them down his legs. He springs free
and my hand wraps around him firmly, massaging his length. He moans in my mouth as I stroke him.

I forcefully pull my shirt up over my head, eager to get his body on mine.
I unclasp my bra, rushing to get it off. His hands cup me perfectly, erupting tingles to the very part I want him to touch and lick.

The way he massages me as he firmly grasps my breast in his hands makes me arch my back as I
hold onto him tighter. He manages to rip my pants off and strip me down. We lay next to each other, flesh to flesh. The heat between us intensifies as I roll my fingers over his chest, memorizing his every chiseled muscled. I don’t ever want to forget how he feels, how he makes me feel, or this very moment.

He
suckles my collarbone as his finger reaches deep inside me. I moan out his name, begging him for more.
More of him.
My needy hands pull him harder against me, digging my nails into his skin. As he calls out my name, the more my body desires him.

“I need you, babe,” I plead, desperate for him
to push inside me. Desperate for his touch…his love…his everything. He senses my urgency and slowly, but sensually pushes inside me. He fills me, making me echo his name repeatedly. The sensation is overwhelming, pleasing, and desperate. All these feelings take over and something overcomes me when I can’t wait any longer. I need him. I pump my hips as hard as I can into him, making him howl from the sudden pressure.

“Sweetheart, you
gotta slow down,” he moans, trying to slow my rhythm. I ignore him and crush my lips to his, moaning, pumping, and grinding my hips to his.

“God, Eric…I need more of you,” I beg, urging his pace faster and harder.
I claw the sheets and scream out as I release around him. The sensation takes over as I arch my back to let him flow into me deeper.

“Holy…” he mumbles, crashing his body to mine.

“Fudge,” I finish for him. He doesn’t comment on my lack of saying the one word he helped me scream after all these years. I’m sure he knows why…and I love him for not pressuring me to say it again.

We lay there together, letting our breathing
become more even as we pant. The endorphins quickly subside, and I feel a burst of emotions flow through me. Before I lose it entirely, I pull on one of his shirts, excuse myself, and walk to his bathroom.

As I shut the bathroom door behind me, I slid
e down crashing to my ass. Tears storm out of my eyes just as I dig my head into my knees. I can’t believe I have to do this, but I have no choice. No matter if we hide or run away, Aiden will always find us. More so, I’d have to live under constant fear that he was there. Always looking over our shoulders, checking for break-ins, making sure we weren’t being followed. That wouldn’t be a life for Eric. I couldn’t ask him to do that for me. I wouldn’t be able to bare the guilt.

No, this is what I have to do. I have tell him I can’t handle the emotional aspects of a relationship and end it. I have to lie. I have to do whatever it takes to convince him it’s over.

The pain. It’s so damn unbearable. I haven’t even done it yet, and I already feel like dying. The sobs continue as I hyperventilate trying to catch my breath. Just the thought of never seeing, touching, or kissing Eric again makes me sick to my stomach. The mere thought of it makes my stomach turn. I rush to the toilet and hurl my guts out.

After I pull myself back together, I wash up and return to his bedroom. He’s laying there with a glass of water ready for me. I plaster a smile and grab it as I thank him. I feel like I’m betraying him, but I have to do it.
Rip off the Band-Aid.

“I’m going to make you something to eat,” he says, kissing my cheek and grabbing shorts. I don’t argue as I watch him walk away, admiring the amazing view.

We spend the rest of the evening together in bed, eating, watching TV, and laughing together. I know I shouldn’t have stayed, but I could
n’t deny my need to be around him. The night is perfect.

As night turns into morning even before
the sun rises, I wake up and decide I need to have him one more time. He’s sleeping peacefully by my side as I give kisses up his arm, to his shoulder, then his neck, and eventually his lips. He wakes up and kisses me back, feeling the urgency to have him again.

This time it’s slow, sensual, and exhilarating. I let him set the pace as he grinds into me, making my body quiver every time he thrusts into me.
He slams into me harder and harder before I release around him. The way his hands caress my skin leaving little tingles behind, the way his lips move across my skin leaving wet, passionate kisses…it’s perfect. The perfect way to say goodbye.

***

We fall asleep tangled in each other. The sun rising finally wakes me, and I begin to plot my plan. I have to make this whole thing believable so he won’t come after me. He needs to think I can’t handle the emotional aspects of a relationship. It’s going to be the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

I dress and quietly kiss Eric on the forehead. I whisper, “I love you. Always,” in his ear before tiptoeing out of his apartment.

I know what I have to do—but it’s killing me. It’s going to be nearly impossible living in the same building as him. I have to make sure we don’t awkwardly run into each other, which means I’ll have to plan my runs around his normal times.

Walking back to my apartment I can’t keep the gut-wrenching stabbing feeling under control. I run into my bathroom as soon as I get to my apartment
.

Afte
r I’m done hurling
again
, I step in the shower and let myself sob.
Uncontrollably.
Every memory of Eric, and of Eric and I together flood my mind. The first time I felt his touch, every single time he’s come to my rescue…always protecting me and saving me, every time A I pushed him away…

I should have never let him get close to me. This is more heartbreaking than I ever imagined possible.

I slowly get it together and crawl into my bed.

Step One
—Avoid Eric

Eric calls me when he wakes up that morning to which I ignore. I can’t take the constant calls so I turn my phone off completely.
I know he’ll be at my door soon, so I tell Carissa to lie for me.

“Tell him I’m not
home; make something up…whatever you have to do. Just don’t let him in, please.”

“
What happened, Lane? You look like you’re panicking.” She sits on the couch next to me, curling her legs underneath her.

I have to lie. I can’t tell her the truth. “I slept with him. And now every time I see him, I have a panic attack,” I lie, knowing she’ll understand.

“Oh, Lane. You know I’m always here for you, but are you going to ruin the best thing that has ever happens to you?” I can tell she’s trying to sound sincere, which I love her for, but I need to convince her.

“I thought I loved him
, Lane. But I was just looking for someone to replace the empty feeling inside me, and now that I’ve realized it, I have to end it before he gets hurt.” Even I’m proud of myself for how convincing I sound.

“Wow, Laney. I’m sorry. I’ll do whatever I can to keep him out of here, but he’s like three times my size, so no promises.” She smiles, making light of the situation.

“Thanks, Riss. I’m sorry to put you in the middle of all this.” She shrugs, knowing darn well I’ve done my duty of keeping old flings out of the apartment for her.

“No worries. I got this.” I inch closer to her and rest my head on her lap.

I hate this. I hate lying to my best friend, I hate being controlled by Aiden, I hate my parents, and I hate myself…for putting Eric in danger.

We snuggle up on the sofa together and start watching one of Carissa’s infamous smutty movies. Tears start to flood down my cheeks, thinking of only the few times I had with Eric.

A loud pounding on the door startles me out of my lost thoughts. I jump off the couch and immediately run to my room and close the door. I knew it was Eric. I know I’m being a coward, but if I face him, I’ll break down and tell him everything.

“She’s not here, Eric,” I hear Carissa through the door.

“Where is she? I’ve been calling her all day.” I hear the pain in his voice, and I want to retract this
completely stupid plan, but I can’t.

“I’m going to be honest with you, Eric,” Carissa lies. “She wants to break up with you, and she’s not strong enough to tell you. She, um, is actually meeting with her ex-boyfriend right now.”
Oh, God.
I face palm my forehead, not believing the words that just came out of her mouth. Part of me wants to praise how brilliant she is for coming up with that suddenly, but the other part wants to smack her for bringing up my ex.