Something Like Winter (10 page)

She pulled away instantly,
face beet red. “Sorry,” she said.

“
What?” he asked,
completely puzzled.

“
I just don’t…” She looked
scared! “I don’t want to do that.”

“
Okay,” Tim said quickly.
“That’s all right.”

The look of fear didn’t
fade.

“
Seriously,” he said. “I
don’t mind.”

And he didn’t. As much as
he wanted to get laid, it wasn’t with her.

Krista flashed a nervous
smile. “Really?”

“
Really. We’re good. Come
here.”

Tim pulled her close, and
she leaned into him, resting her head on his chest. He grasped
around for a subject, anything that didn’t have to do with Ben,
being gay, or sex. “So have you missed me being at school?” he
tried.

“
Yes! Stacy told Bryce he
had to bring me my lunch while you were gone, but he can’t carry
three trays at once, so he had to go back and wait in line for his
food. I thought it was mean and told her to stop, but Stacy thought
it was funny. Finally—”

The “finally” was just the
beginning of what Krista did best. She prattled on, and Tim
relaxed. He let her talk for the next hour, kissing her a few more
times, but only to show her that things were okay. Then he lied and
said the pills were making him tired. He walked her to the door and
kissed her goodbye, but she didn’t go just yet.

“
Timmy?”

“
Yeah?”

“
Do you think I’m a
prude?”

And there was the hint of
fear again. Of course she had heard what everyone said. Rumors
always made it around to the person they were about. She was
terrified of what other people thought of her. Just like he
was.

“
You’re not a prude,” Tim
said. “You’re perfect.”

She stared at him. Then
Krista kissed him one more time and practically skipped to her car.
He’d probably regret that. Lord knows it would only make her like
him more. But maybe, just for today, it would be enough to make her
feel good about herself.

* * * * *

Tim’s breath caught as the
phone rang. Was he really going to do this? His body responded.
Yeah, he was. Assuming Ben didn’t say no. The story Tim had
concocted was so stu—

“
What?” snarled a voice in
his ear.

“
Benjamin?”

“
Tim?”

Okay. Contact established.
“Man, I’m glad I didn’t get one of your parents. Are they still
gone?”

“
Don’t worry about it.”
Ben’s tone sounded warmer. “What’s up? Are you calling to brag or
something? Tell me you aren’t screwing her right now!”

“
No, almost.” Tim did his
best to sound frustrated, which wasn’t a stretch. “Came close, but
she got freaked out by the European standard.”

“
O-kay.”

Tim winced inwardly. Had he
really said that? Brody used to give him hell after noticing in the
shower room that Tim was uncut. For a while he called Tim “the
Frenchman” because he claimed that only the French were
uncircumcised. Tim did a little research and found that most of
Europe didn’t circumcise. Of course Brody only gave him more hell
for this, eventually referring to it as the European
standard.

“
Uh, anyway,” Tim said,
changing tactics, “we got into an argument and she’s
gone.”

“
Sorry?” Ben said, sounding
anything but.

“
So you want to come over?”
The phone line was silent. This wasn’t going well. “Maybe you and I
can pick up where she left off.”

“
I’ll be right there!” The
line clicked and went dead.

Tim grinned. That was more
like it! Ben was on his way over and… Man! Was he really going to
go through with this? If he was, he was going to do it right. Tim
hurried to the bathroom as fast as his crutches would allow,
brushing his teeth, spraying on cologne, and trying to fix his hair
before he gave up. He considered waiting by the door until he
realized how pathetic that would seem, so he returned to the couch
in the den.

You can kiss me, if you
want,
said the ghost in Tim’s mind, but
this time he had an answer.
Hell yeah I’m
going to kiss you!

Tim heard the front door
open. His loose fitting jogging shorts—easy to get on over his
cast—doing nothing to hide his anticipation. But maybe that was
okay. This is what they both wanted, right?

He looked up to find Ben
standing in the doorway. He appeared uncertain too, but when their
eyes locked, Tim guided his gaze downward. When he looked back up
again, Ben’s expression was just as lustful as his own.

“
C’mere,” Tim
invited.

Ben came to him, sat next
to him on the couch. One of them would have to make the first move.
Ben took the initiative, reaching his hand toward Tim’s crotch, but
Tim caught his wrist and stopped him.

“
What’s the rush?” He used
his grip on Ben’s wrist to pull him closer. Hungry, Tim put his
other hand on the back of Ben’s neck and drew him in. He saw the
expression of surprise on Ben’s face just before their lips met,
the kiss clumsy. Then they tried again. Tim put all of himself into
that kiss, capturing Ben’s lips with his own over and over again,
holding Ben’s head in both his hands now as he let his tongue slip
inside.

This was good. Not so
different from kissing a girl, but somehow better, somehow right.
Tim never wanted to stop, but then Ben’s hand found his chest,
feeling his muscles and reminding Tim of what his body needed. He
stopped their kiss long enough to strip off his shirt, grinning
cockily as Ben looked him over with admiration. Then he put Ben’s
hands on those muscles, tingling where Ben’s palm moved across his
skin. Tim stole a few more kisses, but Ben’s hand was moving lower
and lower.

Tim squirmed, and Ben went
for it, grabbing his cock through the shorts.

“
Wow!” he said.

That sounded good! Tim had
no idea how he stacked up to other guys. Everyone snuck sly peeks
in the showers, doing a little covert comparison, but no one walked
around hard. None of them could really tell what anyone else was
packing, but Ben seemed impressed and intent on
un
packing. The elastic band of Tim’s
shorts was pulled down, causing him to tense and sit up.

Ben was staring at Tim’s
dick. Then he pulled the foreskin down experimentally before moving
it back up again.

“
The European standard?”
Ben inquired.

Oh, man. What if it
was
an issue? “It’s
normal over there,” Tim explained.

“
It’s gorgeous.”

To prove it, Ben took it
into his mouth, and Tim collapsed into pleasure. This wasn’t his
first blowjob, not by far, but Benny-boy knew his stuff! Tim
usually prided himself on lasting a long time, being able to run
the marathon until his partner was satisfied, but in Ben’s hands
and mouth, he was helpless. His hips started bucking of their own
accord, and he couldn’t stop moaning. Then he came like a frothing
horse across the finish line. Ben kept him in his mouth. No girl
had ever swallowed, and oh man, did it feel good. Too
good!

“
No more, no more, stop!”
Tim pleaded. He had to pull Ben off before he would let up. Then
Tim tried to catch his breath. “Fuck, that was good,” he panted.
Ben looked proud, but something a little unsure flickered on his
face.

Oh. Right. What about
him?

Tim had spent all his time
fantasizing about kissing Ben, maybe getting blown by him. But he
hadn’t taken it further. He needed time to figure this out. “Man. I
have to take a piss.”

“
That’s cool.”

Neither of them made eye
contact as Tim pulled up his shorts, fumbled with the crutches, and
left the room. Tim stared at himself in the bathroom mirror, his
hair twice as messy now, his silver eyes glazed over like he was on
drugs. The sex had been freaking incredible, but it had also been
selfish. Poor Ben was sitting out there, probably with an erection
so hard it threatened to tear through his shorts.

And the idea was kind of
exciting.

Tim grinned at his
reflection. Why the hell not? He was in this deep already. Tim
flushed the toilet, just for appearances, and headed back to the
den. Ben licked his lips nervously and stood when he
entered.

“
I guess I should get
back,” he said

“
What?” Tim laughed. Poor
guy thought he had served his purpose and was no longer needed
“You’re crazy.” Tim reached him and shoved Ben back on to the
couch. He tossed his crutches aside, falling on him in a clumsy
wrestling move. Ben cried out in amused shock. This was familiar
territory. Tim was the guy, Ben was the girl, and it was his role
to be the dominant one, to take what he wanted. He got Ben on his
back, kissing him, tasting his lips and indirectly tasting himself.
Jesus, this was crazy, but Tim was already getting hard again. He
reached down to Ben’s package and found it in the same
state.

“
Your turn,” he huffed into
Ben’s ear.

Tim slid off to the side,
his knees on the carpet. He pulled up Ben’s shirt, admiring the
narrow waist and the lines of ribs sticking out. So like a girl,
but still a guy. Speaking of which. Tim ripped open the jean
shorts, the buttons popping loose one by one, before yanking
them—and Ben’s underwear—down.

For the first time, he saw
another guy hard. Strange how different the same body part could be
when it belonged to someone else. Ben was cut, of course, the head
always exposed and much more purple than his own. But for a scrawny
little guy, he sure was packing. Tim was bigger, which made him
feel more like a man, but Ben had nothing to be ashamed
of.

“
Nice,” Tim said, taking
hold of it and starting to pump. Ben’s skin felt tighter, probably
because he was circumcised. That made the technique Tim used on
himself impossible, but Ben responded as if Tim was doing fine,
moaning and writhing beneath his touch. The experience was hotter
than Tim had imagined. He pulled Ben’s shirt higher with his free
hand, teasing his nipples with his tongue. Then Tim did what he
loved best, and started kissing Ben again. He was still kissing him
when Ben exploded in his hand.

Tim grinned as Ben groaned
and jerked, taking his revenge until Ben too begged him to stop.
“I’ll grab a towel,” he said. Tim’s stomach rumbled. “And then
you’re going to cook for me.”

Sliding back into their old
routine was easy. The more time Tim spent around Ben, the more he
appreciated that. Nothing was complicated with him. There was no
dramatic discussion about what any of this meant. They had sex,
simple as that. Then they hung out like they always did, watching
TV or putting on music and just talking about whatever.

Ben slept over that night,
making himself a bed on the floor and giving Tim the couch. Somehow
the idea of going upstairs to his room seemed too intimate. Would
they sleep cuddled up together? Despite everything they had done,
the idea sounded weird. Until the next morning, when Tim very much
wanted Ben on that couch with him.

They started off the day by
reenacting the events of the previous evening before it came time
to face the facts. Tim’s parents were coming home, which meant
dismantling this fantasy world, gathering up the pieces, and
putting them away. They were both a little subdued as they cleaned
the house, not wanting their fun to come to an end. But it had. Tim
had to say goodbye.

“
You should probably get
going,” he blurted out. Ben was wiping down the kitchen counters,
even though they clearly didn’t need it. “Just in case my parents
catch an early flight or something.”

Still Ben worked, his brow
furrowing as if the task required his full
concentration.

“
Look,” Tim began, but
while the words were easy to find, saying them wasn’t. “What
happened between us, well…”

Ben’s hand stopped wiping.
He looked Tim straight in the eye, giving his full attention. Maybe
they could still do this, if they could find somewhere to be alone.
But there was something even more crucial than that.

“It’s probably best we keep it a
secret,” Tim said. “I just don’t want people to get the wrong
idea.”

“
Wrong idea?” Ben
repeated.

“
There’s nothing
wrong
with it,” Tim
backpedaled. “I just don’t want people thinking I'm gay when I’m
not.”

Ben looked at Tim
curiously, like he was speaking a foreign language. But then he
said, very carefully, “Okay. Not a big deal.”

All right! That wasn’t so
hard. He thought Ben would be upset. In a strange way, Tim was kind
of disappointed he wasn’t.

“
So are you going to call
me?” Ben added.

“
Yeah, totally!” Tim felt
he said this with a little too much enthusiasm, so he added, “We’re
buds.”

“
Cool,” Ben replied. “I’m
off, then. Good luck with your parents when they get
here.”

“
Good luck with yours! I
hope you won’t be in too much trouble.” Tim reached out and tousled
Ben’s hair, thinking about drawing him in for a kiss, but that
wouldn’t be fair. Not if this was the end, and he couldn’t be sure
that it wasn’t.