Shattered Hart (25 page)

It takes every ounce of self-control that I possess not to burst in to tears. Instead, I stand there stock still as I feel the blood leaving my face and I hear Dominique and Delilah gasp from behind me.

I thought I’d known pain over Damien before.  I was wrong.  I’d take a thousand hours of the pain of him pushing me away in exchange for the agony I feel in my chest right now.  The thought that runs through my head is that now I know what a broken heart feels like.  I’d only thought I understood before.  The reality is far worse.

My brain screams “escape, escape” and without a word I turn
and make my way from the room and run upstairs in to the bathroom, sliding down the wall to sit on the floor with my head in my hands.
Inside myself I am screaming and crying, but on the outside I keep it in.
  I
can’t
cry. 
I
can’t
. 
I refuse to meet Damien and his
girlfriend
with a tear stained face. 

I hear the door to the bathroom open
and
I struggle to regain my composure before I look to see
who’s
here.  Taking a deep breath, I silently pray for strength as I lift my head and find Dominique and Delilah coming to sit in front of me.

Delilah wastes no time getting right to the point. 
“Brooke… I’m so sorry.
  We
didn’t
know there was a girlfriend.  Dominique and I both have known for a while that
you
and Damien have feelings for each other, but we
didn’t
want to upset you by saying anything. We’ve been waiting for
you
to come to us when you were ready.”

I feel relief that they know, but the relief is so muted by everything else that
it’s
almost non-existent.  I try to muster a smile but
can’t
quite get there, and I just shrug my shoulders.  “I’ve wanted desperately to discuss it with both of
you
, but I
didn’t
want Damien to be mad at me for spilling the beans. 
He’s
told me often enough that he
can’t
be with me in that way, but I was holding out hope in my heart of hearts.  I’m an idiot.”

Delilah and Dominique get on either side of me and wrap their arms around me, comforting me and letting me know that they support me.

A few moments
pass in silence and then Delilah says, “Let me guess. 
He told you he’s no good for you?”

I nod and say, “Yes. 
You
know your brother
very
well. 
He’s
been pushing me away for months. 
That’s
why I’ve been so absent lately.”

Delilah says nothing, just shakes her head with a sad look on her face and the room returns to silence until Dominique speaks. 

“I guess
being pushed
away hurts like a bitch.  It always seems like a good idea at the time, but I know that if Damien saw
you
right now,
he’d
know how wrong it was.”

I shake my head.  “It
doesn’t
matter now.  I’ve been a fool, and Damien bringing a girlfriend to dinner only proves that.  I’ve no choice but to
go down
there and make the best of it.”

After a few more minutes spent huddling against the bathroom wall with the girls, I take a deep breath and stand. 

“
Let’s go get this over with.”

Dominique
holds my ha
nd as we walk down the stairs as
Delilah leads the way.  I pause in the doorway to the kitchen when I see that Damien is facing away from me
,
talking to Dante and my sister. 
He’s got his arm around the girl he’s brought with him, and I feel it like I’ve been kicked in the gut.

I see my sister look at me
and
her face tells
me she
has questions, but I shake my head.  Later, I tell her with my eyes.  She
doesn’t
look happy, but she gives me an almost imperceptible nod.

Pulling my hand from Dominique’s, I step in to the kitchen and brace myself to meet the girl Damien cares enough about to have brought her to a family dinner.
 

Although we
aren’t
holding hands anymore, Dominique stays at my side as we cross the kitchen for the introductions.  We’re almost close enough to get the introductions started when Damien starts to turn toward us.

I
can’t
look at him, so I
don’t
. 
I focus on the back of the girls head and will her to turn around.
  I need to see the girl that has Damien.  When she turns, I feel sick to my core.  Of course, she has to be
absolutely
gorgeous. 

From next to me, I hear Dominique let out a shocked gasp at the same time that I see Damien’s girlfriend
’
s mouth drop open. 
What the hell? She looks like
she’s
just seen a ghost. 
Following her gaze, I turn to Dominique, only to find her staring at the girl in clear shock.

Stepping forward, Damien’s girlfriend walks toward us and stops in front of Dominique.  “Nikki? What are
you
doing here?”

The silence
is broken
by two more harsh gasps, and I spin to find Damien and Spencer gapi
ng at each other.  What the hell
is going on?

I look at Sabrina and Dante, but they seem as confused as I am.  Clearly the three of us are missing something.  With a cry of despair, Dominique runs from the room.  Delilah grabs my hand and the two of us head upstairs to look for her. 

We find her in one of the guest bedrooms, lying on the bed with her face jammed in to a pillow.  Delilah curls up next to her on one side
and
I take the other.  Could this day get any
freakin
g
weirder?

Clearly Damien’s girlfriend knows Dominique, but she
can’t
know her
very
well
sin
ce
she called her Nikki. 
I’ve
never ever
heard someone call her that before.

Delilah and I each
lay
with a hand on Dominique’s back, rubbing in circular motions as we stare at each other.  I raise an eyebrow at her
and
she lifts her shoulders, letting me know that she has no clue either.

We each rub her back and encourage her to speak, but she says nothing.  After a few minutes, the
silence
is broken
when Dominique flips over and sits up. 
Looking at
Delilah
she says, “
I really wish it wasn’t coming out like this, and I apologize for being a coward and not saying something to you in particular before now.
I’m a lesbian.”

Turning to
me
she
says, “
I’m pretty sure I’m in love with the girl Damien has downstairs. 
She’s
gay too, which means she was only masquerading as his girlfriend
.”

My immediate reaction is to push everything about Damien and the girl out of my head.  I need to focus on Dominique, let her know that I
don’t
care that
she’s
gay.

Delilah speaks first, grabbing her twin in a massive hug.  “I’ve suspected as much for a long time. 
You can’t really have thought that any of us would care who you love!
  I love
you
no matter what. 
You’ve
been silly.”

When Delilah pulls back, I grab Dominique and hug her too. 
“I couldn’t possibly care less about you being a lesbian.
All I care about is that the person that
you
care about treats you well. 
You
never needed to keep this a secret.”

Pulling back, I see that
she’s
quietly crying.  “I love
you
girls so much.  I knew
you
guys would understand. 
It’s
Dante and Damien that I’ve been worried about.”

Delilah and I both stare at her
in surprise.  What the heck does she think those two are
going to do? 
They both
are far from
being close minded
.

Delilah asks the question before I can.  “Why would
you
be worried about them?  Those two adore
you
and they always will.  How can
you
not know that they
won’t
care?”

Swiping at her tears Dominique says, “Because of mom and dad.  I know that Damien and Dante both had issues with the fact that they swung both ways and had sex with any and everybody.  I
don’t
want them to think that I’m promiscuous or sex crazy like
our
parents were.”

Delilah brushes that off with a “
Humph
,” and so do I.  I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that neither of her brothers will blink an eye, as long as
she’s
happy.

Our
conversation
is interrupted
by a knock at the door. 
Without waiting for one of us to say come in, the door swings open and Dante, Sabrina, Damien and Spencer walk in.

My sister all but radiates anger in Damien’s direction, and I realize that while we’ve been sitting up here talking to Dominique, Damien must have confessed that she’s not really his girlfriend.

Coming to the end of the bed, Dante gestures for Dominique to come to him, and I watch with a lump in my throat as she
bounces off the bed in to his waiting arms.

“Dominique… I love
you
honey.  I’ll always love
you
, no matter what.  It breaks my heart that
you
thought you had to keep this a secret from me, from all of us.  We’re your family, and
that’s
forever.”

Damien walks to the side of her and grabs her from Dante.  “
I agree with everything that
big
lug just said. 
You’ll
always be my baby.  Nothing
you
can do would ever make me turn my back on you. 
I’m sorry about tonight but I’m in a way I’m also glad if it helps you to be able to get out there and
have
love.
 
That’s
all I’ve ever wanted for you.”

Spencer is next, followed by Sabrina.  The room all but overflows with love for Dominique, and I can see that a weight
has been lifted
from her shoulders. 

Gesturing toward the door Spencer says, “Tally is in the den. 
You
need to go talk to her. 
Clearly
you
have some explaining to do. 
You could have knocked me over with a feather when she identified you as being the Nikki that Damien and I have been hearing about.
 
She’s
a
wonderful
girl Dominique. 
Don’t
let her get away.”

After nodding at Spencer, Dominique looks at each one of us for a minute before smiling. 
“You all are the best family that a girl could ask for.
  I’m going to go make this right.  I love
you
guys!”

I think each of us has a tear in our eye as she leaves the room to go face her future.
 

For a few moments after Dominique leaves, the room is silent. 
When I see my sister coming toward me, I put up my hand in a “Stop” gesture.
  “I’d like to speak to Damien everybody.  Can we please have a few minutes?”

The emptying of the bedroom happens within seconds,
leaving
Damien and I alone.  My stomach is in knots, my thoughts a mish mash of angry thoughts.

After closing the door, he turns and looks at me, his mouth opening as he starts to say something. 

Holding my h
and up,
I say, “Shut up. 
You
shut your mouth until
you’re
ready to answer this question
, and answer it honestly. 
Don’t
you
dare lie to me about
this
.
Did
you
, or did you not, bring that poor girl here specifically to make me go away?”