Shallow Love (3 page)

Still in her
party dress, she woke up the next morning with sunlight streaming in her bedroom, realising she must have slept in, as she gazed at the alarm clock, that she had forgotten to set. She was shocked to see that it was ten in the morning and she had slept like a rock.

“Carrie,” she said aloud, “why didn’t you get me up? I never sleep in that late?”

But her words fell on deaf ears, Carrie was not home and she got up to go to the bathroom and saw a note left on her dresser.

Dear Sis,
I came home early this morning, let myself in and saw you were sleeping like a baby, so I didn’t want to wake you. I will be at Liam’s place, we have moved in together, I picked up some of my things this morning. Talk to you soon, Carrie.

Jackie glimpsed in
the mirror in the bathroom and her face looked wretched, she showered, dried her hair, brushed her teeth and then dressed. Her amazing sister and best friend had finally spread her wings. She had moved out and was now living with the love of her life. She felt a gush of happiness for Carrie, but she also felt a little sorry for herself, that she was going to be living alone and she disliked the idea, that there was no one to come home to anymore. She didn’t like the notion of being single and she was really hurting, at the prospect of coming home to an empty house. It wasn’t going to be an easy adjustment, she would probably be talking to herself for a while. She only imagined what it was like for widows or widowers who had lost their partners. Or the newly separated or divorced, who had no one to come home too. It was a devastating, unassuming reality for many people, who had to adjust. She just needed to get out of the house, do some retail therapy and order a strong latte, to be rid of the headache, that had surfaced.

She had lost her faith in men so many times, that she felt she was destined to be alone. It was a horrible feeling, knowing that you had so much to offer a man and you just couldn’t meet the one that valued you. Her ex-boyfriend had left the country and her parents had lived and worked overseas and now her sister had left her too. It was like everyone she cared about had gone their separate ways.

She changed into
a pair of black, wet look jeans and a black frilly blouse. She wasn’t accustomed to wearing all black, but she was in a dark mood and she didn’t feel like wearing anything bright. She picked up her gold clutch and her car keys and closed the door behind her. Then turned up the volume on the radio and drove to the city, where the bustling crowds of people, made her feel so much better.

Chapter Three

J
ackie stayed in touch with her sister in the past few weeks by phone, as they had both been too busy to catch up in person. Jackie worked full-time and by the time she got home she had to make something to eat and go to bed. Her sister had dropped by quickly, one Saturday afternoon to pick up her belongings, before going back to be with her fiancé. It wasn’t an easy adjustment for Jackie, but she had to grin and bear it, until she met the man of her dreams too. She always believed that there was someone for everyone, the only problem was that she hadn’t met him yet.

When Sunday came
around, there was a cool breeze blowing outside and a gentle speck of sunlight. Jackie went for a twenty minute stroll by the lake, to get some fresh air to relieve some anxiety. It felt good to breathe in the fresh air, as she was so accustomed to being indoors due to her work. Although she enjoyed going for short walks on Sunday afternoons, there was one thing that always made her feel uneasy.

She would always see couples walking together holding hands and chatting to each other blissfully and sometimes she would see them kissing and that would always hurt. In her heart of hearts, she knew she could offer the right man all her love and make him happy. She believed relationships were significant and were worth all the work, to grow and prosper into something beautiful. She longed to be married someday and live a long and happy life, filled with lots of love and laughter with the right man, who would cherish her.

Going home that
afternoon to an empty house gave her a cold feeling, she hated not having someone around, she was so used to her sister being there, that she sometimes didn’t know how to cope. She wanted to call her most nights, that’s when she felt the void more, but she didn’t want to impose on her new life with Liam. She knew what couples in love got up to in the evenings and she didn’t want to interfere, it had only been a few weeks, since they had moved in together.

She was overjoyed with her sister’s happiness and although she felt sorry for herself, she was determined to remain optimistic about her love life. She had learnt from past relationships, that you can’t force someone to be with you, they are either into you or they are not. That’s what she found so fascinating about Carrie’s relationship with Liam, that they were so in sync with each other. He was so supportive, even when she had lost her job, Carrie had told her, that Liam had joked but embraced her newly unemployed status, saying how he didn’t care if she worked ever again, he would always provide for her, in good times and in bad. That was a real man, one who loved you unconditionally, this was not just love, in Jackie’s eyes, it was pure love!

She knew Liam was truly the right man for her sister, because if someone loves you when you are down and out, they always will. She always believed true love was unconditional, it never set rules on you, nor did it try to make you do something you didn’t feel comfortable with. The real men, the good men of this world loved you unconditionally, not for your bank balance. Jackie knew her sister Carrie had a huge personality, wasn’t afraid to be herself and was immensely helpful and giving. Liam was a lucky man to have met her sister, she was easy to live with and always handy around the home. She could change light bulbs, fix anything that broke and she was an extraordinary cook. For someone who had never attended a single cooking class, she was ace at it. That’s what Jackie missed most, Carrie’s talent for home cooked meals. She would always offer to make dinner, when she was home early, as Jackie wouldn’t get home, until six in the evening on most nights. The house would often smell of aromatic spices, Mexican, Indian, Mediterranean. Carrie knew how to make your taste buds go wild, that’s what she really loved about her sister, that she didn’t do something for you and ask for something in return. Jackie hardly ever cooked, given her hectic work schedule and she was out of practice in the kitchen. What she loved most about Carrie, was that she would do things just to see her smile and that made her happy, she was very kind and they had shared a special bond between them.

The past few
weeks had dragged on for Jackie, she hated cooking when she would get home, as it was after six in the evening and coming home to an empty house, had made her feel sad. She wasn’t really one to watch television either, it wasn’t her thing, she preferred turning on the radio most of the time, when she was home. Cooking a proper meal would take hours, so she would often make a quick sandwich or heat up a pre- cooked meal from the freezer. A day off work, was what she really needed, a whole day to herself, just to unwind.

She often daydreamed about what it would feel like to be married one day and come home to her husband. She was a simple woman, who had so much love to give, to a man who appreciated her. She had tried online dating, but it had proved unreliable in finding an honest man. It was quite sickening, thought Jackie as she lay in bed thinking an early night wasn’t so bad. At least she wouldn’t waste her time with dishonest, dirty men, who didn’t have good intentions.

Most of her friends in college had been married and they had lost contact, she had a series of short relationships in the past, but they had all ended within a year. And she had often felt like she was a man magnet for attracting selfish, opportunistic men, that didn’t deserve her. Jackie loved to be romanced, but she had never met anyone romantic. Her ex-boyfriends had the stingy gene and they exploited the fact, that she had a high paying salary. She honestly couldn’t work out men and why most of them, only cared about themselves.

Although she was Editor of a fashion magazine, she was thinking of including a short column about relationships, she had a wealth of experience, that she could share with her readers.

This month’s edition
was dedicated to high trend make-up and the latest fashion in handbags and shoes. Women worshipped shoes around the world and Jackie had connections in Paris and Milan, who delivered. She had an incredible, fulfilling career, earning a prestigious award, as one of the most profitable publications in Australia. It was second to none on the fashion front, she had a passion for fashion, as it was part of her job criteria, to always be in vogue. She had purchased enough pairs of shoes to last her a lifetime and she had a flood of accessories in her wardrobe. But material things weren’t enough to make her happy, she felt an emptiness inside her heart, that had needed to be filled with love.

Another lonely night
and she was going to bed early, it was ten in the evening, she put on a pair of silky pyjamas, cleansed and toned her face. She pulled the sheets off her bed and replaced them with a warm, velvet blanket. It was a cold night and all she wanted to do was to bury her head under the blanket to keep warm. She slept in a sizeable bed and although comfortable, it always made her feel more alone. She longed for the day that she would meet someone, who cared enough to be with her forever and she felt too old to be single and unlucky to not have found love.

She switched on her mobile, as she lay in bed feeling lonely. She browsed the internet, checked her emails and found one from head office. It was an invitation inviting her to attend a night of pure indulgence! Canapés and unlimited bubbly, in honour of
Glamour
’s tenth birthday. It was going to be held at the Grand Hyatt Ballroom, on a Saturday night in a week’s time. She switched off her phone and turned off the down light in her bedroom, she smiled breathing a sigh of relief, that maybe this party is exactly what she needed. She picked up a Vogue brochure, from her magazine rack and flicked through it, fantasizing about what she would wear. She had an abundance of clothes in her wardrobe, but she always felt that she had nothing to wear.

Flicking through the brochure, she focused on a lacy, black dress. It looked classy, with a hint of seduction and she would wear it with a pair of blingy, high heels. She would team it up with bold, gold accessories on her wrist and a dazzling pair of earrings, that would turn heads.

The following morning
she had taken leave off work and gave her sister a call as she had missed her. She put the kettle on to make a coffee and she dialled her sister’s number.

“Hey sis,it’s me, how you doing I missed you?”

“Me too, I can’t wait to catch up for lunch, I told Liam I had missed my sister and we were going to do girly things today.”

Jackie laughed. She had always been close to Carrie and they had much to discuss over lunch.

“What did Liam say about that?’

“He was cool about it, he knows how close we are and he just wants us to have fun today.”

Jackie smiled. “How about we go to Johnnies Café in the city, I hear it’s new and it serves the best potatoes and the tastiest chicken schnitzel.”

“Sounds Yum!’’ said Carrie, I bet you could use a cooked meal hey?”

“Tell me about it, I come home and I just can’t be bothered cooking.”

“Well I’ll meet you there at twelve thirty.”

“I can’t wait sis,” said Jackie, delighted at the prospect of catching up with her sister and having a good chit chat over lunch. Jackie left an hour earlier and drove into the city, to purchase her dress for the upcoming event.

The attendant looked busy as Jackie looked for her size, relieved she found it hanging on the back wall. She charged hurriedly in to the change rooms, thrilled to try it on, but checking the time on her wrist, so she wasn’t running late. As she glanced in the mirror outside the change rooms, the consultant stood staring at her dress.

“Absolutely stunning, that dress looks amazing on you.”

Jackie double checked in the mirror, making sure it was right, before she decided.

“I do love it actually,” she smiled. “I think this is the one for me.”

“I want one too,” grinned the assistant.

“I’ll take it, thank you.” Jackie responded. Then she left the boutique on her way to meet Carrie.

Johnnie’s café was bustling with customers and Jackie was glad that she had booked a table, she arrived at exactly half past twelve and Carrie walked in at the same time and they bumped shoulders on the way in.

“I’m starving,’’ hinted Carrie. “I skipped breakfast this morning.

They were seated at their tables and the waitress handed them the menus.

“Can I get you girls some drinks?”

“Yes I’ll have a glass of lemon, lime bitters with no ice” said Jackie.

“Make that two,” added Carrie.

“Done,” said the waitress. I’ll come back for your order soon.

They ordered some wedges with sweet chilli and sour cream sauce as an appetiser, then a light salad, with crispy, baked potatoes and crumbed schnitzels as a main course.