Shades of Atlantis (21 page)

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Authors: Carol Oates

BOOK: Shades of Atlantis
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Rules? I exclaimed incredulously. I thought when I got to eighteen the rules would start to ease.

Do you want to see Caleb or not? Lewis said, his expression somewhere between defeat and anguish.

So, they weren’t going to say I couldn’t see him, but I could see from Lewis’s face he was hoping I would say no to his question. He should save his wishful thinking for things that had some chance of happening.

Triona, Lewis said, exasperated.

Oh, sorry. I had unconsciously picked up my phone and was once again twisting it in my hands. I put it back in position on my desk and rubbed my leg instead.

Lewis pinched the bridge of his nose and closed his eyes. Rules, he started again. You lied, so you’re grounded until further notice. I narrowed my eyes, already planning that Caleb could visit me here while Carmel and Lewis were at work and I was under house arrest.

No more overnights at Caleb’s. Is that understood?

Nothing happened, I protested. I couldn’t believe I had to say it out loud. Lewis winced, and his cheeks slightly reddened. I wasn’t sure if it was as embarrassing for him as it was for me, or if he was still angry. I got a secret satisfaction thinking it was probably embarrassment.

Caleb can see you here.

I was planning on that regardless.

We would rather that, than have you sneak around to see him behind our backs.

That’s fair. I forced a smile, thinking I couldn’t be getting off that easy.

He stood up, so apparently I was.

Yes, well, it won’t happen again. That was a warning; I could hear it in his tone. Oh, one other thing, he added, hoisting up his jeans.

I knew it couldn’t be that easy.

We would like it if Caleb came over for dinner later. My breath caught in my chest, and I was suddenly glad Lewis didn’t own a shotgun, although it did pass through my mind for a fraction of a second that he might be planning to borrow one.

It’s okay, Triona, you can breathe.

 

I took a breath.

We realize we can’t stop you seeing him and we can’t stop you leaving. He tightened his eyes. But you have to realize we love you, and both Carmel and I would lay down our lives for you and Ben. We’re trusting your judgment here and giving Caleb the benefit of the doubt. He said it so seriously and sincerely, my heart almost burst with love.

I leaped up and swung my arms around him. Thanks, I said sincerely.

He patted my back awkwardly. Yeah, well, I just hope we don’t all have to regret it later.

You won’t, I promised, releasing him and smiling. The relief I felt was tangible. Everything was falling into place, and I could handle being trapped in this house as long as Caleb was with me. It didn’t really feel like a punishment at all. I was curious about one thing, though. What did he say to make you change your mind?

I saw an emotion I couldn’t read flicker in Lewis’s eyes; his nostrils flared when he inhaled. I wasn’t eager to remind him of his anger, but I wanted to know. Lewis’s jaw clenched and relaxed inside of a moment.

He told me more or less what I just said about Carmel and me. I couldn’t see if he was still annoyed or scared. Lewis couldn’t be scared; he was much too big to be afraid of anything. He apologized for worrying us and assured me he won’t allow anything or anyone to hurt you.

And? I knew by his hesitation there was more, and I narrowed my eyes quizzically.

He said he’d die for you. Lewis’s eyebrows rose. I have to say I believe him.

 

I waited until Lewis left, satisfied that we’d convinced him Caleb wasn’t the serial killer or dangerous monster they’d initially thought. I ached to hear his voice, and I even grabbed up the phone the minute Lewis was out the door, before I stopped myself. What if he was busy? What if he’d had enough of my company for now I had spent the night with him, after all. I knew Caleb loved me, so I was probably being stupid, but I couldn’t stand the idea of being one of those clingy girlfriends who never let their boyfriends have a moment’s peace.

Instead of calling, I went back to my laptop and typed sword of light into the search engine. It kind of worked; just thinking about the stories he’d told me made me feel closer to him. I didn’t want to push him for answers he wasn’t ready to give me, but I really was curious about the stories he’d told me. Among numerous fantasy game references were links to both of the stories Caleb told me about. I clicked on Excalibur first, but there was nothing about Merlin being one of the race of gods Caleb had mentioned.

Next I tried Celtic legends and found a link to Bres. I wasn’t exactly breaking any rules or promises. I’d said I wouldn’t ask about his secrets, and I wouldn’t, but this wasn’t his secret, it was history.

And it was disappointing. I found nothing to give me any clues about what he was really trying to tell me, if he really had been trying to tell me something. It was just a story. Bres was a nasty piece of work, the god-people were known as Tuatha DÈ Danann, and one of their enemies were the Formarians. They had trusted Bres to bring the two sides together, but instead he’d ripped them further apart, making his father-in-law dig ditches and selling the DÈ Danann’s magic. There was nothing about Brigid going to Greece, nothing about her hiding the sword. I gave up and shut the computer off when the need to hear Caleb’s voice became too overwhelming to resist.

 

The conversation at dinner was casual and a little stilted. Caleb was flawlessly polite, and Carmel and Lewis were the consummate hosts. It felt like a fifties family movie even Ben chewed with his mouth closed. It warmed my heart to know they were all doing this for me.

For the next three weeks, I was the perfect inmate. I went to school, or more accurately, Caleb took me and then picked me up afterward to bring me home. Ben was enjoying default ownership of my car, Bessie, since I had no need for her lately. Some days Caleb helped me make dinner, teaching me instantly forgotten culinary techniques, and some days he helped me with my homework or sat silently reading while I tackled my studies alone.

He ate with us most nights, and sometimes Amanda did too. I was grateful for the moral support.

After dinner we usually just hung out. I didn’t ask any of the questions I’d promised not to ask, but every now and then Caleb would offer a piece of information, sometimes even a relevant one. For example, his family was, as he called it, old money, and the restaurant was for pleasure rather than profit. Sometimes the information was completely irrelevant, like the vampire craze that swept Europe in the eighteenth century, when people were killed, their hearts ripped out, and family graves desecrated.

 

When Lewis and Carmel were out playing bridge one night, something Carmel enjoyed and Lewis endured, Caleb mentioned the sword again in conversation. He said it was one of four magical items belonging to the god-people, who I knew now as DÈ Danann. Those four items a cauldron, a spear, a stone, and the sword were represented as the four suits of the tarot and, in later years, playing cards. The sword became a spade.

Another time, he was reading about witch trials and told me how young women and men were viciously beaten and burned, how it was used as a cull of innocents.

Caleb was my own personal life-sized encyclopedia, except that this encyclopedia could wrap me up tightly in his arms when I shuddered at one of his stories and make my knees weak with his kisses.

The snow thawed, and so did the atmosphere between my aunt and uncle and Caleb. His persistence, constant politeness, and old-world manners were paying off. One evening when I was clearing up the kitchen with Carmel after dinner and Caleb was with Ben and Lewis in the TV room, she even went so far as to admit maybe they were wrong about not trusting Caleb at first. She said it was clear to anyone who had seen us together that he simply adored me.

The restaurant reopened in March, and by then Joshua had returned from New York. Seth, however, stayed in Europe, and by late spring still hadn’t come back. Caleb didn’t seem particularly eager to see him return, and I knew he was dreading telling Seth about our relationship.

Hey, Triona, I’m leaving now, Jen called from the kitchen door of the restaurant. Jonathan’s outside.

I was hanging out in the dining room while Caleb talked to Joshua.

Bye, I replied, absently folding and unfolding a napkin.

She hesitated a moment, turning toward the kitchen and then back before approaching. Did you ask him yet?

I scowled. I knew what she was referring to. Not yet. She rolled her eyes. Triona, what is the problem? It’s not as if he’ll tell you to go ahead and take someone else.

I know, I sighed, scrunching the napkin in my hand. But prom? It’s so high school.

Jen flicked her hair over her shoulder and gave me a disparaging look, blowing out air through her tightly pursed lips. You are in high school, she said pointedly.

 

I knew that, but Caleb wasn’t in high school, and I wasn’t sure how to ask him to take me to such a teenage rite of passage. He was so mature for his age, I just couldn’t see him wanting to go, but yet again I had stupidly promised my friends that I would.

Jen sighed and rested one arm on the top of the counter. Look, Triona, she started determinedly, Jonathan and I are going to Boston in the fall. Amanda’s going to be off decorating the planet and making it a more beautiful place, and you’re going to Europe with Caleb. We’ve got prom and graduation, and that’s it. Then we have to grow up. Can’t you just try to enjoy it? The irritation in her tone was only very thinly veiled.

I silently played with the crumpled napkin.

You could ask Chris, she suggested lightly.

My head shot up, but she was grinning sarcastically. Chris had avoided me like I’d contracted some deadly disease ever since Caleb’s return at Christmas.

Okay, okay, I conceded, breathing out heavily through my nose. I’ll ask him. Happy?

Jen nodded, smiling. If he will go as far as London with you, I’m sure this will be a breeze. She smiled again and headed back to the kitchen. See you.

Not if I see you first, I muttered dryly under my breath.

Just as she was about to push the door, it pushed in toward the dining room, almost hitting her.

Jen! Caleb exclaimed, visibly shaken. Are you hurt?

No, not at all, she said, grinning easily. It’s fine. You didn’t get me.

Are you sure? he asked anxiously. He held his hands up as if ready to catch her if she fell.

Absolutely. Her eyes darted to me, confounded.

Caleb’s arms settled by his side and his brow furrowed. He still looked concerned, like he didn’t believe her. Okay, then, if you’re sure. I’ll see you on your next shift.

Yep. She frowned. Looking forward to it. She looked back to me, and when she raised her eyebrows, I shrugged. She mouthed the words Don’t forget to ask him before she left.

Caleb was by my side with astonishing speed; it always shocked me the way he moved when we were alone. Sometimes it was almost like he didn’t notice he was doing it, like he forgot he was playing a role. He took my face in his hands and placed a long lingering kiss on my lips. The silken feel of his lips never failed to reignite the ache inside me or make my heart beat faster.

 

What was that about? I asked conversationally as I tried to regain my equilibrium before standing.

I was distracted. He attempted to dismiss what had just happened, but his jaw was tense, and the little vein on his neck stood out.

Distracted by what? I pushed. I kept my expression even so he wouldn’t know I wanted him to admit why a minor accident would concern him so much.

Caleb was stronger than the average person; it was one of the things I wasn’t allowed ask about. I was getting used to it, watching and saying nothing. I noticed things, even if my rational mind debated and then ignored them. His blue eyes gleamed as he placed the napkins I hadn’t managed to mangle back in their place.

It’s nothing.

I sighed in exasperation and looked down to my hands. At this rate we won’t be able to talk about anything.

Caleb gently placed a finger under my chin to lift my face and bent his knees to bring himself down to my eye level. His expression was soft, still uneasy but open. It’s nothing doesn’t always mean I can’t tell you.

Sometimes it’s just nothing for you to worry about. I placed my hand against the smooth golden skin on his face and told him straight, If it worries you, it worries me. He smiled. Of course. Forgive me.

I took my hand away and placed it on his waist instead, holding him close to me.

It’s Seth, he began bleakly. I don’t like the people he’s been mixing with.

Oh.

And Joshua. He stopped as if listening for something and then placed a hand on my shoulder and leaned in closer whispering into my ear. He’s having a few women problems. His voice was so low I had to strain to hear him.

Oh, I muttered again. I couldn’t imagine Joshua having women problems other than an excess of admirers. What kind of women problems? I asked in a hushed voice almost as quiet as Caleb’s.

His lips formed a straight line as he considered his answer. I’m not really sure. He refuses to discuss it.

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